So I've noticed how in quite a few novels that the breaking up of engagements is used to generate enemys in the early chapters (my most recent discovery being BTTH) and now I wonder why it's such a big deal. I know of the ridiculous importance of face in xianxia etc. but in BTTH they even try it in a somewhat polite way with a reasonable excuse and yet everyone acts as if they just killed his firstborn or something, can someone explain?
face my dear boy those guys (and girls) care a lot about face and breaking a engagement without a good reason is for them like saying that the girl or boy isn't good enough for them
It's like a trope for novels.... Want to humiliate MC, Break off engagement....Just something to make the MC wanna become stronger...
Well I mean considering the circumstances the reason wasn't to bad but I guess you are right they just care to much about a useless concept
If I remember correctly, in BTTH they weren't very polite about it. You need to remember that this is more of an eastern culture than a western culture. Giving money is more of a mocking charity than reparations. It's like intentionally running over someone's dog and then throwing money in their face. You know it's wrong to do, you know it's a wrong way to go about it, but you still do it that way.
it is all about prestige.Also,it is considered especially bad if it is the female side that is breaking the engagement..Often times,it is assumed that this was done cuz the guy was 'incompetent'.
Arranged marriages tend to lean toward the female character marrying into the male characters family. Using a crude metaphor of Cake... The baker gifts a slice of the cake as a pre-taste of what is to come. The buyer of the cake enjoys the taste and sits in anticipation for the day for the full cake to come of similar taste. But something occurs to the Buyer preventing him to actually pay for the cake. But he wants to postpone the payment. The Baker wants the payment on the spot and breaks up the cake sale which results in a Buyer without a cake for someone's special day. Vice versa if the Buyer doesn't pay for the cake albeit it already has been baked and is too late to turn around. Because this cake is specially produced for this buyer. As consequence it will be hard to sell the cake to another person unless they do not mind second-hand goods. Generally, this also means the product will be sold at a cheaper price. Also known as a Loss.
They were polite in BTTH? I thought the problem was not what the girl did but the way she did it that was the problem. If she truly was polite then Xiao Yan probably wouldn't have cared and said fine~
"Xiao Yan’s face darkened. At this moment he was furious, not because Nalan Yanran did not want him as her husband but rather, because Nalan Yanran is trying to cancel the marriage with the entire clan present! If that happens then his father would lose much of his dignity and respect within the clan!" - Chapter 4 "Using the dishonorable title, Xiao Yan forced the elders to be silent. In the strict clan, doing something as blasphemous as disrespecting one’s ancestors would be enough for them to lose their spot as an elder of the clan." - chapter 6 "Even though Xiao Yan had endured countless taunts over the past three years, even he had a limit. Nalan Yanran’s actions had roughly stepped on the final shred of dignity hidden deep within Xiao Yan’s heart." - Chapter 7 So, you've got disrespect towards his father, which undermines his position as clan head. Disrespect towards his ancestors, which is a big no no in a lot of traditions, but notably in ancient Chinese ones. And disrespect towards Xiao Yan, when he was already down and getting kicked around.
Breaking engagement in BTTH is polite? As Asian I don't think what Nalan Yan Ran doing is polite... For breaking engagement politely usually parent will do the talk privately and reparations usually is something that will be paid by agreement of both side. What she does is bring high level sect member and threaten Xiao Yan and his father to break the engagement without consulting her own parent
It's all about face. If they were simply two people getting married and only their parents and friends knew about it and one of them broke off the engagement, the situation will be more manageable. If the person breaking off the engagement does not have a good reason to do so, the family of the other will be pissed. If the reason is that, let's say, the man cheated on his fiancee and the fiancee broke off the engament, then people will think it was right to do so. The girl in BTTH doesn't really have a good reason to break off the engagement. The MC is a cripple with no future, and while you can say that's a good enough reason, it still is quite of a douche move to say you aren't going to marry, because the future looks grim. If you were engaged to a girl and you were waiting for a job that will pay you a lot, or you began a company and it's doing well in the beginning, then you either don't get the job or your company stops being profitable and then your fiancee breaks off the engagement, because your future doesn't look that good anymore, wouldn't you be angry? I would. And then you have the arranged marriage thing, tradition and so on, and a teenage girl comes your house to break off the engagement your grandfather had made with her grandfather. She is the one getting married, but the ones in an arranged marriage don't have much say in it. You can run away from it, but it's hard to break it off. She was just being an ass. That's how I see it anyways. It's not that weird, but it's a cheap way to make antagonists.