[Short Story] Dim Smoke

Discussion in 'Community Creations' started by MungMan, Aug 19, 2016.

  1. MungMan

    MungMan Well-Known Member

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    Here's something I wrote for fun:

    “This way ma’am,” he instructed before turning away from the young woman.

    He was a tall and sharply dressed young man, his voice and expression however carried anything but youthful energy. Feeling a presence from behind her, the woman turned to see another young man appear. He was similarly dressed and his face wore the same lifeless expression. His stature however could not compare. His eyes on the woman, he gestured towards her to follow the taller boy, and she quickly complied. The journey through the poorly lit hallway was short and uneventful. However, as the taller boy’s massive strides threatened to leave her behind and the short boy drawing a bead on the back of her neck, the woman felt that she had been walking for hours.

    While feeling her heart continuously assault her chest, the three of them reached their destination. The tall boy swiftly opened the dusky door that they had stopped at. He politely gestured to the woman to enter, the short boy’s eyes still latched onto her like a fishing line. She stepped forward, her slender limbs almost shivering. As she made her way through the doorway, a river current of cigarette smoke blasted in her face. She felt her lungs complain to her as her breath shortened. She felt the need to cough, to release whatever she had unintentionally inhaled. However, showing any form of weakness now would be seen as nothing but surrender. She desperately held her breath, not wanting to make her situation any worse. A single mediocre light bulb provided the illumination for the windowless room, giving the room only slightly better light than the hallway. Under the hanging light was the only furnishing in the room: a simple wooden table, two chairs on each end that complimented the table, and a single solitary figure who sat on one of the chairs.

    The door that connected the room to the outside world smashed closed like a gunshot. The woman’s heart almost exploded in response. The snip of a scream that escaped her mouth likely went unnoticed by the figure. His head was facing the table which held playing cards arranged in a peculiar order. Much of the cards were held by his own hands and the entirety of his attention was dedicated to whatever he was playing. A clean auburn hat was perched atop his head, and he wore a simple white dress shirt and no tie. Soft smoke floated above a pile of extinguished cigarettes which sat inside an ash tray on the table. The light of the room was not sufficient to reveal his face which continued to focus on his cards.

    “Sit down,” a simple phrase shot towards the woman with unrelenting pressure.

    She did not dare respond vocally, and did not dare disobey, all she dared to do was quickly comply and make her way to the vacant seat. The man continued to repeatedly rearrange his cards for several minutes. The woman, still uncertain of what to do, opened her mouth for the first time but was quickly interrupted.

    “Name?” he barked at her with an expectedly husky and cigarette infused voice, his attention still devoted to his cards.

    “Julie,” she spoke for the first time since entering the building, but her voice was an ounce of her usual confidence and energy.

    “Julie what?” he asked quickly his head still facing the table.

    “Virgo, Julie Virgo,” she responded nervously.

    “Virgo huh? You’re from out of town,” his voice seemed to mellow out slightly, but Julie was still on high alert.

    The man continued to play with his cards with his cards without interruption, the only sounds being the rattling of the paper cards, his own hissing breathing, and to Julie only the beating of her heart.

    “You know why you’re here right now?” the man finally resumed his questions.

    “It’s because my-,” Julie started, but didn’t end.

    “Because he fucking ran away!” the man’s deafening roar erupted and seemed to rattle the entire room as he slammed all the cards he was holding onto the desk.

    Julie almost felt her heart finally stop as the man’s focus snapped from the cards and towards Julie, his eyes stared straight into her soul. His face was no longer hidden from the light, now it was perfectly clear. His rough face was freshly shaven, and appeared plastic smooth under the dim light. Balding grey hair peaked from under his hat. His eyes were squinting and fraught with malice.

    “That good-for-nothing piece of garbage ran away!” he continued to bark at Julie to keep her in a daze.

    “Do you realize how much he owes us, the Mazerati Family?” Julie was visibly shaking and unable to respond, “more than three of you will ever make in a lifetime! Now he’s fucking gone!” his deafening cry continued to shake the room.

    “I’m sorry, I didn’t know,” Julie’s words came out with a sob as she unsuccessfully tried to fight back tears.

    “Do you think I care!? With your husband gone, who in hell will pay his damned debt!?” he violently demanded.

    “He isn’t my husband, he was just providing for me,” Julie’s words were messy and could only be barely understood, “I had nothing when I came to the city, and he-.“

    “Don’t you dare try to feed me bullshit. You were involved with him, now you will cover for him,” the man shot his words at Julie like a machinegun, “this isn’t about choice, this is about compliance. You either comply, or I will personally force you to.”

    Tears had already flooded Julie’s face as she began to lightly sob, the figure of the man becoming quickly blurry before her tears. The man collected the cards from the table and began to rearrange them in the same peculiar order as before.

    His attention was once again on his cards when he inquired from the now broken Julie, “name?”

    Julie could not respond.

    “Name!?” the man slightly raised his voice.

    “Julie Virgo,” Julie responded with a quivering voice.

    “Wrong,” the man snapped, “you’re now Julie Mazerati.”

    “We’re done here,” the man momentarily stopped playing to say.

    The entrance door suddenly swung open to reveal the tall boy from before. The noise of the door opening caught Julie’s attention as did the boy gesturing her to leave. Upon reaching the door, she turned back to gaze at the dim, smoke filled room. She was surprised to have already grown used to the pungent stench of cigarette smoke. Julie followed the tall boy back through the hallway. The short boy was nowhere to be seen. Julie’s head faced the floor while she walked, when the tall boy began speaking.

    “It’s scary, the first time talking to him,” he enlightened Julie in an emotionless voice, “but don’t worry, you’ll get used to it.”

    Julie looked up at the tall boy as he spoke, and then turned her head back towards the door she had stepped out of. Her life had taken a more dramatic turn than when she first arrived in the city, but she will never forget the dim smoke surrounding the Mazerati Family boss.
     
    Balthazzar likes this.
  2. Balthazzar

    Balthazzar 『Reformed Member of NuF Society』

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    ITSS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD
     
  3. CandleLight

    CandleLight Well-Known Member

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    Do we have anything like a list of original short-stories or one-shots? Cuz it'll be nice to just dump them all in same place for collection's sake.
     
  4. emry987

    emry987 can not think of one just too lazy

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    yh good story
     
  5. Unde-kyun

    Unde-kyun 【FLOATING】【Rowing a rowboat】

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    It says «short story» >:'c I believe you.
     
  6. Twilight Fox

    Twilight Fox 【Foxy】【Ayayayay!】

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    huh...now i want to write one!

    Gimme a week or so and ill do it.