The Iron Teeth: a dark fantasy web serial

Discussion in 'Community Fictions' started by ClearMadness, Nov 25, 2015.

  1. zgulf

    zgulf 『Lini-chan's Plaything』

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  2. ClearMadness

    ClearMadness Well-Known Member

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    It doesn't really matter to me. I put up my ads more to offer other artists a chance to advertise on my site, I don't really earn anything from them at all. Also, don't forget to rate my story on rrl, and vote for me on top web fiction! :)
     
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  3. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    Queen of Swords 7.6 has now been released!

    That giggle as he came from above amused me to no end
     
  4. winter woods

    winter woods [no Title]

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    im gonna read it to the end it sounds pretty good
     
  5. ClearMadness

    ClearMadness Well-Known Member

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    Up to Queen of Swords 7.11 is now out!
     
  6. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    Wow I've been busy and forgot to update
     
  7. Cien

    Cien 『Omnivore Reader』Inactive

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    Finally got around to reading this, it very good. Stalking is so much fun.. lol

    Proofread a bit ? is when im not sure if its an error or not,

    1-2. Sater -> Saeter
    1-3. Sater -> Saeter
    1-6. practically ->Particularly (?)
    0-2. Zekus -> Zeckus
    3-2. He had decided to work on his human by talking as much as possible. -> human language?
    4-4. Bandit's -> Bandits
    4-5. ‘Maybe, but there’s still something off about him. Something different…” -> double quotes
    4-6. He enjoyed eating them raw, but after so many days on the road he felt like hot food -> eating hot food (?)
    4-6. In fact he felt like more than just rabbit. (?)
    5-5. He then hurried back onto the street and away. -> ran away (?)
    5-7 & 5-8 [inconsistency]. 2 days for the meeting @ 5.7 but several days @ 5.8
    7-1. idot -> idiot(?)
    Zelen’s pet -> Zelena's pet
     
  8. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    I would say that several of these are less grammatical errors and more a distinct part of the author's writing style (they fall in the grey zone of English Grammar).

    3-2 "work on his human" contextually implies 'language' without having to explicitly say it.
    Similarly, the 4.6, "felt like hot food" also implies that he felt like 'eating' hot food without saying it. The next line too, "felt like more than just rabbit" builds off of the contextual implications of the previous sentence to mean 'he felt like eating more than just rabbit' without having to say eating

    And 5.5 does not need the verb 'ran' added because hurry itself is the verb. The meaning of the sentence is simply, "He then hurried back onto the street and 'hurried' away" with the second hurried being unnecessary to explicitly write
     
  9. Cien

    Cien 『Omnivore Reader』Inactive

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    hence the question mark...
     
  10. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    Yeah I was simply explaining the ones I thought weren't errors and why
     
  11. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    Queen of Swords 7.12-14 have now been released!

    Go enjoy the game of Cat and mouse!
     
  12. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    I haven't updated this in awhile.
    Queen of Swords 7.15-17 have now been released!
    Epilogue: The Flow of Shadows, Prologue: Rooting in Broken Earth are also released.
    And the first 4 chapters of the new added-in arc Playing with Fire 4.1-4.4 have also been released
     
  13. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    Playing with Fire 4.5-4.6 have been released!

    Since they don't appear in the latest chapters feed for whatever reason, go to the table of contents to access them.
     
  14. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    Playing with Fire 4.7-4.8 have been released!

    Again go to the table of contents to read from Book 1.

    Also Rolling the Dice 1 the first part of the first chapter of Book 3, has been released.
     
  15. ClearMadness

    ClearMadness Well-Known Member

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    I had no idea that people were still replying to this thread.I had assumed it got buried. :p

    Thanks @Arcturus .
     
  16. ClearMadness

    ClearMadness Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for pointing these out.
     
  17. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    I've been updating it with some irregularity. You write and I'll post for you.
     
  18. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    An update:
    Rolling the Dice 2-4 have been released.

    Also @ClearMadness in Rolling the Dice 3, I spotted a typo:
    Manpower isn’t hard to come by out here, with all the deserters feeling the southern wars.”
    It should be "fleeing" not "feeling"
     
  19. ClearMadness

    ClearMadness Well-Known Member

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    They are actually very sensitive people...
    Okay, not really. Fixed, thanks. :p
     
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  20. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    An update:
    Rolling the Dice 5-7 have been released. And I thought you said something about BN doing some evolving of some sort soon?