The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System fan fiction

Look. For the poor sods who are about to suffer/ already suffering, they probably think it's angsty and heartwrenching, okay?

 

***
ATDSVT
***
When he, Ao Jiang, Mu Gang, Wu Guen and Qiang Xin had all come to Cang Qiong's territory, they had quickly taken note of the truly terrifying number of visible defenses around the village closest to the peaks, where the families of outer sect disciples (and the outer sect disciples themselves) all supposedly lived. It wasn't even a village anymore. It was a walled fortress trading town that looked like it might eventually be expanded even further.

Since their actual goal was Qing Jing, Ao Jiang's suggestion that they break the place open wasn't taken seriously. They had more important things to do, after all, so it would be best to simply enter and investigate the now famous market. In the distance, they could see unusually tall stone buildings with shining ceramic-tiled roofs, with painted carved simple bas reliefs of some kind of plantlike shapes. Supposedly those were dormitories. There was one closer to the town gate, which was supposedly an inn.

Stone and wood. Stone and wood. No rammed earth buildings here. though earth and clay had been wrapped around the stone buildings and town walls as further cushioning against arrows and the like.

Even the market was well warded, what the hell?!

The market was full of various luxury goods, spices, medicines, foods and various items from many places and many countries, some of which were even seen only in cosmopolitan cities, sold by far-traveling merchants. Here and there, one saw goods from fabrics and ceramics to glassware, the now very much in vogue brightly colored feathers and iridescent beetle wings and shells used for decoration of clothing and accessories.

The town looked peaceful and prosperous... and some of the mortals were even better looking than Mang Aoxing and his companions themselves; which Qiang Xin clearly found infuriating.

Qiang Xin was used to being the most beautiful, pampered maiden in their province and its small immortal sects and cultivating lineages. The granddaughter of one of the Purple Cloud Chasing Peak's elders and daughter of two of its lost heroes, praises for her beauty had been sung throughout the province, and her virtues and skill were both well known. People in that province considered her to be as graceful and beautiful as a fairy. People had said her manner was elegant, otherworldly and refined, her beauty was matchless and exceptional, her curves were exquisite and her face was perfect and faultless.

And yet right now, she could see at least five maidens in the marketplace who were even prettier than her!

It was enough to make one vomit blood!

 

*whispers* kitty is happy now

 

G, the exceptionally dazzling and utterly BEWITCHING man of everyone's DESIRE.

 

*whispers* does kitty wants to see more?

 

Yes kitty wants to see more~

 

the prelude to some intense chrysanthemum gate exercise~~

 

tbh always want to see more especially about people's pelvises and reproductory organs exploding G, the exceptionally dazzling and utterly BEWITCHING man of everyone's DESIRE.

 

G always mutters that they only say those things about him because they lack pornography and the internet for comparison.*
*This is probably completely true.

 

waiting for


some hot plant action~

 

ehm.

what does this makes us with all the abundance of internet...?

 

Happy perverts who will agree Yue Qingyuan is the fairest of them all.

 

***
ATDSVT
***
Mang Aoxing had thought this would be easy. So had all his companions including Qiang Xin, who had been eager to find out what kinds of treasures would be on the bodies of Qing Jing Inner sect disciples.

None of them had been prepared for what they were getting into.

First there had been their attempts to lure and corner Qing Jing Outer Sect disciples in the nearby forests around the mountain. That had failed miserably.

For one, none of the Qing Jing Outer sect disciples were as weak as their own sect's outer disciples were and for another, they traveled in packs. Very able packs.

Packs that, like wolves, could tear down a much bigger opponent and packs that seemed to know where their fellows were.

For another, the forests themselves were a formation. Not only had their attempts to lure and attack the outer sect disciples not failed miserably, but they had also gotten themselves horribly lost. Over and over again.

Then for the third, the forests were full of mythical and magical and mystical beasts, spirit beasts and summons....

And all of them were of a much higher level than all of the Purple Cloud Chasing Peak disciples were.

When they fled from the beasts that had been happily throwing them around and beating them to a pulp, they fell into quick sand.

When everyone except the now terrified and hysterical Mu Gang managed to finally escape from the quicksand after losing everything they had been carrying with them, they twisted their ankles in rabbit holes.

Hobbling away from the rabbit holes, poor Ao Jiang stepped into a concealed magma pit. While he was able to grab on to a nearby bush and prevent himself from falling into the pit to die, he had to crawl away, screaming, from it. None of his companions helped him.

Wu Guen stepped into an equally concealed acid pit and suffered the same dire fate... of losing his legs.

Mang Aoxing and Qiang Xin were then the last members of their group.

They couldn't even find the comrades they had abandoned.

Alas for Qiang Xin, who had thought they would be able to capture and threaten the much younger Qing Jing apprentices to tell them where the peak's treasures were.

The sight of the two beautiful girls (they must have been from Xian Shu Peak!) that she had caught, at least two years younger than her own fifteen, had infuriated her. How could there be women who were so much more beautiful than her in this world?! It wasn't fair! She had always been the fairest!

Naturally she demanded their grooming supplies along with all the treasures on their bodies.

The resultant horrible, unarmed beatdown that the two invading disciples now suffered was... anticlimactic.

***

The thing was, thanks to the fact that a certain peak lord had been working with the system and could thus pick from more advanced worlds, it could not be denied that many of those other worlds had ways to develop their cores much, much faster and more safely.

In light of these facts, Qing Jing and Cang Qiong's people had rapidly been strengthened though that same peak lord's attempts to get the rest of the sect-yes, even the pathetically weak An Ding peak, even if it was only the inner sect disciples..
- to at least pump it up a notch.

In short, unknown to the rest of the cultivation world, the smaller sects had basically been left in their wake.

Even as these last two idiots had been knocked unconscious by the two boys who the foolish girl had just demanded cosmetics from, and hauled off by Ushabtis to be bound in power draining vines and investigated... since Shizun liked knowing what groups of idiots to take righteous vengeance on..

Zhao Fu snarled angrily, "This is the fourth group of morons this week! You'd think that they would have learned their lessons by now."

Wang An shrugged."Morons will be morons. Come on, let's go pick up their equally stupid friends from the pits."

"I'd really love to shove pumpkins up their asses and roll them downhill." muttered the annoyed Zhao Fu. "They're getting on my nerves."

"Patience, brother." Wang An stated darkly. "There will be time for tuber planting later."

***

 

Ohohoho~
just tuber...???
what about the infamous Corn...????



the legendary yaoi corn

 

Because "troll"?

 

Right, I just woke up, who is online?

 

sneaks in and throws popcorn everywhere

 

*Raises hand

*cleans up the thrown popcorn

 

*flicks an ear*