Yep, crazy title, right? Well... It's just a sort of resolution I arrived at today.
I work at home-office, I don't have many deadlines and am pretty free to determine my work schedule... While this is reaaaaaally nice, it also means I need a lot of discipline to actually work. I intend to increase it, but for now I can only bring myself to work 4h per day.
... I don't always work all the 4h though, there are many times I laze around too much before I start, so I end up not finishing my work in time before it's sleep time.
Putting aside the problem that I will earn less at the end of the month if I don't work properly, it isn't much more of an issue to not finish work before sleep, I can just finish it on the next day.
Well, guess what? Friday exists, and what comes after Friday...? Saturday.
Last week I worked on both Saturday and Sunday, but it was because I had just gotten back into working, so I didn't mind working on one weekend to get my rhythm going, but that was only for that one week, I have no intention of working on weekends because I need to rest... Well, I lazed around too much on Friday and didn't finish my job, so I finished it on Saturday...
Dear God, it's so hard to work on Saturday! I wanna laze around! I don't wanna work! Let me rest!!! >.<
I do like my work btw, it's just... Work is not a hobby, work is tiring, work takes a toll on you, and working on a day you programmed yourself to rest is incredibly tiring. I don't want to work on Saturday again.
So... I can't laze around on Friday anymore! For the sake of not working on Saturday, I'll make sure to not laze around on Friday!!!!
I feel like this has been one of the strongest motivators I have had in quite some time... Not the strongest though, my strongest one was my girlfriend incentivizing me to steadily get back into work~ <3
Still, I really felt like this was a serious motivator... I guess things affect us a lot when it affects our idle time... Idle time is important.
Like, very very important, we all need time to relax, I remember on some fights with my mom in which she called me (and my brother too) lazy and stuff, because she did "this that and that" at our age, while we only (because it's apparently a very easy and not taxing thing) needed to study, so how could we not do it well?
It is kinda funny because I remember her at a few times complaining she couldn't do everything because she "wasn't made of iron"... Well, I started saying she is made of iron at one point, because the things she did at my age were simply impossible for me, I simply accepted that she was some sort of monstrous being beyond human comprehension that could do 10x more work than a normal human can... Well, she kinda lived like that until her 50s, when she finally started having some time for herself... >.>
And I only look at this and think... "How?" How could she do as much as she did, resuming her whole life for some 40ish years to studying, working and working at home? It's impossible, it's absolutely impossible, and I saw her doing it anyway.
For me though? I know I can't do that, I need my free time, I need to laze around, I need to NUF everyday, it's not a want, it's a need. I need to rest and nothing can take my rest time away from me except myself... So... Seeing myself taking my rest time away worked as a pretty good motivator. I won't laze around again, because I want to laze around when I'm supposed to be lazing around.
It's a weird feeling, but somehow helps me, so I think it's okay~