A Glimpse

Author

Bad Storm

[Directionally Challenged]
Messages:
150
Likes:
283
Points:
138
Blog Posts:
12
Schizophrenia. One word. This is just one word. But, this one damn word defined who I am today. A crucial block on the foundation of the person I have become and will ever be. This one word, I never knew it then, is the reason for so much heartaches and pain that even now is still buried deeply in my bones, carved to my flesh, and seared to my soul.

People always say that our childhood will always be a part of us. Every lesson learned, every affection earned, every pain that burned are little puzzle pieces formed together to make the image of us. I believe them. Because, I still feel the shadows of my past lurking beneath the surface, just waiting for a trigger that will unleash it- destroying everything I tried to build from the shambles I call my life.

I used to think crazy is normal. Will that not be the case for everyone if they grew up with crazy? I don't really know because I can't simply put myself in someone else's shoes and declare that I understand them. That would be an insult. We never know. We never really know how people feel unless we have felt that ourselves. And even then, we might still not understand. We are different people living with different circumstances. Every factor could make a world of difference. For me, that big and defining factor is my mother and every crazy thing she did that I thought was normal. All those crazy talks, strange paranoia, anti-social tendencies, and neglectful behavior--I grew up thinking this is normal. My kind of normal. A normal that no one around me really know about because they are already locked down inside my heart, never to see the light of day again. If it ever did, that would be the day that everyone realizes that I never have know their kind of normal; I will be just someone different.

P. S. Finally wrote something blog-like. :blobowoevil::blobparty:
As the title states, this is just a glimpse of who I am. I put it out for the world to see not because I want sympathy and all those whatnot. I just want to write, to take it out of myself and let it go where it will go.

Clozdark and Emmyy like this.

Comments

    1. Bad Storm Jun 13, 2018
      I basically have kinds of normal by now. One never really seeing the light of day (unless expressed cryptically)...
    2. Clozdark Jun 13, 2018
      that's though i hope you find your new standard of normality
    3. Bad Storm Jun 12, 2018
      I kinda noticed. Read Admiring a Writter hehe. Sure, I love to try any blog recommendations. I'll probably post more since my classes won't start until 2 months later.
      Clozdark and Emmyy like this.
    4. Emmyy Jun 12, 2018
      I'm a big fan of his writings @Clozdark! The blog section is my favorite part of NUF..
      Noche I also enjoy very much..looking forward to more blogs from you ! :)
      Clozdark and Bad Storm like this.
    5. Bad Storm Jun 12, 2018
      Thank you! It was my pleasure sharing. :aww:

      I was already planning to binge read blogs. Actually, just finished Clozdark's blog post just minutes ago haha.
      Clozdark and Emmyy like this.
    6. Emmyy Jun 12, 2018
      I love your poems..there is a blog here by @AliceShiki called Normality that is very good.. I reccomend all her blogs ! She has heartfelt blogs dealing with her life:)
      Clozdark and Bad Storm like this.