Why is writing so difficult? I thought I was done once I got 2300 words down, but then I read through it and saw how it was barely legible. It took me three days to write this trash. When did it become trash!? Writing it I thought it was amazing! Ugh. I try to cobble together the meanings of the words I wrote and patch them up. And then Once I finish with one paragraph I notice an hour has gone by. WHY IS IT SO DIFFICULT!?
I'm almost done with a quarter of it, but then I notice a gigantic flaw in the flow of the logic of the story and have to think of a way around it. Do I just scrap everything, be done with it and start anew? No, I can still salvage this into something I'm proud of! This wasn't all a waste of time! After changing this sentence over and over again I fail to see a fix and then take a nap because of how fried my brain feels. I realized I only needed to add a single adjective to the original sentence to make it make sense. Am I stupid? But I found the answer as well! So only the past me is stupid! Right?
I finally move on to the next portion, If I finish it I'll be at the halfway point. Thank goodness this part was mostly comedy. Am I being lazy by relying on comedy so much? And even after I rewrite it to make sense, I still have to rewrite it again to make the words "come alive". What the hell does that even mean? WRITING IS A TERRIBLE PASS TIME! WHO THE HELL WOULD SUBJECT THEMSELVES TO THIS!? Reading was so much fun, so much easier. Not to mention how it took me hours to write my first sentence. Why is this fun? Am I a sadist?