Being happy for a friend

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Jevanka926

Grumpy and Awkward <3, Female
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A friend, let's just call him Edmund, is so excited in our group chat, it turns out that he has confessed to his crush. He made a whatsapp story and the girl replied to it, asking who the girl is. He then admitted that it's her.

He told us that he's been liking her or years, 3 years to be exact. Everyone is so happy for him and the girl. I have to admmit that they are really cute, so, I wish all the best for them.

Liking someone sometimes feel beautiful but also painful at the same time, I'm happy that he could confess and the girl didn't react negatively. He told us that he coouldn't sleep last night because he was thinking on how to ask her out.

I asked, "Are you going to give her chocolate? Or maybe a flower? But that will be too conspicious."

He said, "Well, either that, or I'll sing her a song,"

Another friend, Fey, then replied, "Just do both,"

He's so happy that he's still talking baout it, he told us that he was so nervous and lost his composure. It's cute. The girl is also cute. They were also classmates and after three years, he finally confessed. By the way, he transferred to our clas (Science class) from another class (Social Science class).

I'm so happy for him. I bet another friend, Liam, who is also the class' president is so damn envious of him. Why? Because he couldn't even talk properly in front of his crush -though not everyone knows who she is, but Fey does- and he doesn't even have enough courage to text her.

He got sligtly bitter (?) and said something like Edmund is weak for confessing through texts, then some of us replied with;

"At least he's brave enough,"

"Shut up, Liam, you're the weakest,"

I also said, "Those who don't dare to text the person they like should stay quiet first,"

Then I remembered about me confessing through a text. It didn't end well and I was in denial for some time, wondering whether I'm not good enough or such, wondering where do I lack. I got angry, I got upset, I was reluctant. Now years have passed and time somehow flies in a blink, somehow the date on my phone and laptop keeps changing. The fleeting memories, the fleeting feelings. Before this year, I used to wonder; Why do the people I like never like me back? Where do I lack, to the point that no one likes me? Maybe that's because I don't look good enough, maybe my personality is just that annoying, maybe I'm simply someone as unbearable as what my family sometimes tell me.

Then one day I suddenly realized, just like the guy who liked me but I didn't like him back, just like the cute guys whose faces and figures I like to see but I never like them, the feeling of 'like' is just that complicated. Now I can finally understand, just like how I simply don't return someone's feeling, other people also have the right to do so. It's a simple truth that many has understood, but it took me quite some years before I can finally accept and understand that. I know the theory, but I never truly understood about it.

Now that I look back, I think life has made truly understood about it. It was hard and suffocating, but after years, I can finally recover from the pain. The scar may always be there, becoming a reminder, but now I can touch it differently.

I may get hurt in the future, I may get sad, I may get heartbroken, but maybe, that's just how life is? Ah, I remember a poem I wrote some years ago in my language.

About Life
The wind breeze brought me wrade through time
Back to the first time I bloomed
Life principals held since the start
A journey to maturity

Forged by the world's viciousness
Slowly wilted as time passed
A petal that fell because of the wind breeze
Almost gave up to life

But time never waits
Forcing me to get up and face the reality
Forgiving myself who is imperfect and full of flaws
Letting go of my story that is never started
Being acquintanced with my pain and trying to hide it alone

And now I can finally bloom again
Trying to do the best
Looking at the wide future ahead me
Valuing each and every event in my life

I welcome the new me
The flower who is now ready to walk my life

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Comments

    1. Eru101 Oct 2, 2021
      I also feel the same way for my friends who have their love life. They are just so adorable. Sometimes, I just found myself smiling at them whenever I had the chance to witness them being together. ( 〃▽〃)
      Jevanka926 likes this.