Death

Author

AliceShiki

『Ms. Tree』『Magical Girl of Love and Justice』, Female
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Today I discovered someone I knew died. It wasn't unexpected, that person had health problems and I didn't hear of them for over a year, but I had no way of contacting them, so I couldn't really know... A relative of them ended up contacting me about it though, so I discovered it.

It was... Weird, I felt sad no doubt, it's never happy to see someone you liked dying... At the same time I got happy, because that relative was someone I hadn't talked to before, and now we had a chance to meet, a new person, someone I wanted to be close with too.

It is a strange feeling, I guess we weren't that close because I don't really feel that sad, I feel happier to know that their relative bothered to talk to me about it and help me understand the situation than I was saddened by the death... I honestly feel guilty about it.

Death is not supposed to be a happy thing, it's not supposed to be something you don't care much about... Yet it's how I feel right now... Happy for meeting a new person, happy for being told about it, happy that they might be in a better place now... Happy to understand a bit more about them from a person that knew them way better than I did.

It honestly feels just wrong to feel like this, but it's how I'm feeling right now... Of course the sadness is still there though, much more than having their relative talking to me, I'd be happier if they could both be still in this world, still talking, laughing and playing together... We can't have everything I suppose...

I don't know, I just felt like I needed to say this, I never felt like this about someone's death, it's definitely not a feeling I enjoy having... But it is what it is.

Comments

    1. BookDevourer Mar 22, 2019
      Oh?
    2. Osamaru Mar 21, 2019
      *lights candles*
      It's never a fun thing to go through or experience, but at the same time, it's part of life. Yes, there is a time for morning, but when we lose someone when also have to remeber to take time to celebrate too. Not that they are gone, but that they were a part of our lifes at all. To celebrate the memories and good times that you shared.
      I belive that's the best thing you can give them.
      AliceShiki likes this.
    3. Clozdark Mar 20, 2019
      not being left out about information especially about families&relatives i think its fine being happy about it,since by informing that you realize the bond between your families&relatives still exist
      AMissingLinguist and AliceShiki like this.
    4. AliceShiki Mar 20, 2019
      @BookDevourer Absolutely not, I feel pretty horrible when people close to me die.
    5. BookDevourer Mar 20, 2019
      it just means you're at peace with the fact that people will die no matter what.
      Bitter Sweet and TwilightForest like this.