Square Room (Poems, Trigger Warning)

A stack of books
Unwritten essays
And piles of tissues

Blood trickled down from the nose
Sighs from dark lips
Hoping the lights will go out soon

What are you fighting for, Little Girl?
Is it for the expectations,
that weighs down your chest?
Or is it for the dreams,
that slowly burns your will to live alive?

You want to give up
Sinking deep under the blue water
Letting go of your burdens, love, and hatred
Yet you know you can't
So you stay inside that square room
Writing numbers that slowly kills you

You're afraid God will never forgive you
So you stay inside that square room
Where you always wish to sleep,
and never wake up ever again

You hate the truth that you're alive
Yet at the same time, you also enjoy it a little bit
But at the same time, you wonder
How nice would it be to stop breathing?

You want to die
Yet you're scared of pain
You just want to die quietly
Like a burning candle

In that square room
Filled with laughter and noises
You sit alone on your chair
Wondering how nice would it be to have a dagger

In that square room
You swallow your loneliness
You know your temper isn't the best
And you swear you're trying

But when anger filled your heart
Numbers filled your brain
Numbness starts seeping to your bones
You no longer care

And in that square room
No one notices
A girl with her books
Secretly painting with her lovely pins


-----------
Table of Contents


It's not that I hate math, but I really can't understand it and no matter how hard I've tried I just can't. Feel so damn stupid rn. If you have time, please pray for me so I could graduate my school with A in my math and science report