Virtual and Physical

Author

AliceShiki

『Ms. Tree』『Magical Girl of Love and Justice』, Female
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The idea that the virtual is somehow less real than the physical is often held onto by those who do not see the power of the imagination and the mind.
In this infinite of universes we are but echoes of minds infinitely beyond our own.
And our own minds echo endlessly.
The pain that some feel even now attests to the power of the virtual and of the physical.
Love is joy.
Love is pain.
Love is meant to be eternal.
- Falerin Ardendor.

I wanted to start this blog post by quoting this. I'm not sure if I could call it a poem, but it's something that was said by my favorite writer... And it's written in his in-game memorial after he passed away.

My relationship with the virtual world is a bit... Strange perhaps? I'm not sure... When I was younger I didn't really care for online relationships or people I met online in general, if I ever added someone to my in-game friend list, it was mainly because I felt pressured. Which is why I immediately deleted them as soon as I logged in in the next day, I didn't feel like there was any point in calling someone a "friend" if I wasn't a friend of them IRL.

This started changing a bit circa 2012-2014 when I started becoming active in the AE forums... It was my first online community and I made some friends there, that was pretty much the only place I was active online until I found NUF in 2016. At that point I kinda abandoned AE forums completely and became a total NUF addict and uhn... Well, lots of stuff happened I guess? I entered 2 LDRs with people I met in NUF, made very close friendly relationships with people on the other side of the world, found people that I cared more for than I ever cared for my family, discovered more about myself and... Even helped out some people that were going through heavy emotional distress at times.

Time passed and my addiction to NUF faded a bit, I still love it in here, but it's not the same thing... Especially because many of the people I cared for aren't here anymore... So I went back to AE forums, and I didn't stop there, I started becoming more active in reddit, youtube and other places that I could talk to others... My entire socialization became restricted to talking to other people online, and honestly? I love it. It's a lot more fun to me to spend my whole day talking to others than it is to spend that day reading a novel.

I realized quite some time ago how much those online relationships matter to me, and how much I can grow to care for someone that I never met IRL and whose face I don't even know. It's quite surprising how real those relationships can be... The fact that there is a computer between us doesn't make the fact that there are 2 people talking to each other any less real, that's what I believe, and I know I'm not the only one that believes on that.

And because of that... It just strikes me as weird when I find someone that simply... Can't see the validity of an online relationship.

I talked to my godmother yesterday, we were never on the best terms, but we try keeping a good relationship... I wanted to tell her about a pretty personal issue, and the conversation ended up going to this part of my online life because I'm kinda addicted to it... Yeah, I don't really deny I'm addicted to it, I'm absolutely in love with my online life... Perhaps because it's a lot better than my IRL life, but that's besides the point.

And well, my godmother really really can't understand or care for online relationships, for her the only ones that matter are the IRL ones... But at that point I just have to ask... Why? Why does being near to each other in flesh make any difference? And... Well, we couldn't quite reach an agreement there.

I wonder if it's a generation gap of sorts? It's kinda weird because she has a youtube channel with almost 100,000 subscribers yet she can't see why an online relationship is important... Does she not interact with her subscribers? Does she not care for them? I don't really understand how that works.

I have just went through so much and met so many people through my computer's screen that I... Can't quite get how could someone think that those relationships aren't important, they mean everything to me.

Perhaps it's a thing of not wanting to see? If you never allow yourself to have a meaningful online relationship, I suppose you'll never have one... I dunno, I don't think I'm wrong on this, I can't fathom a world where talking to others online doesn't mean that you're actively interacting in a way that is as meaningful as interacting IRL.

It's tiring and sad to hear someone diminish the validity of experiences that changed one's life... But I suppose that's a part of life. We can't always be understood I guess.

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Comments

    1. Suton Sep 2, 2019
      I like this blog. (◕▿◕✿)
    2. Everlasting Spring Sep 2, 2019
      ++ Looks like your virtual DOPAMINES are on high from long ++
      :blobhyperthink::blobhyperthink:
    3. AliceShiki Sep 2, 2019
      @kyuukestu Glad you could get help to solve the part you had trouble with! \(^^)/

      And yeah, people we've met online can definitely be godsends at times~
      kyuukestu likes this.
    4. kyuukestu Sep 2, 2019
      Do what you can, I guess. I have friends online who were absolute god-sends! Last year while I was doing my project for programming I got stuck for weeks on a segment and the project in question was due for a final grade. It was actually an online friend who in turn had another online friend who was a programmer, and she managed to get me some professional help.

      I think you've got a bit more leeway with your relationships, but it will depend on how you (and the other person as well, relationships are a two-party thing after all) see things, and your own circumstances.

      If you've got the money, and intention to turn an online relationship into something face-to-face then you most definitely can. Don't they have all those advertisements going around about how successful online dating is?
      AliceShiki likes this.
    5. AliceShiki Sep 1, 2019
      @kyuukestu I agree! Really depends on how you define your own relationships~

      @UnGrave That's true, online we can't offer anything more than our thoughts and advices, we can definitely do a lot more IRL... And at the same time, that's many times all we need to do~
      kyuukestu likes this.
    6. asriu Sep 1, 2019
      heh back then pen friends was on rage, only exchange messages via postmail can considered as friend

      anyway to each own
      mental support is complicate yet simple thing I guess
      yes I consider this problem as mental support
      it similar with how someone can change just because of reading a book
      time change but few thing imo stay same maybe on future people will just fine living with a robot

      space exploration era I guess

      anyway virtual relationships is effect of information evolution
      different era have different way to define connection
      put balance between virtual and physical relationships is da main problem lay
      social live functions cuz human expected to have it to sime degree to be accepted by society

      pfft take it easy la~
      kyuukestu, AliceShiki and hitedo like this.
    7. UnGrave Sep 1, 2019
      I mean, for me the only difference between in person and online interactions is the difference in the limits my relationship with that individual can go. I treat everyone with the same level of indifference when I first meet them, both online and in person, and can grow to be more familiar with them. I can even grow exited to talk to individuals from both these groups. However, only in the real world can I actually gain benefits from being close to them. I can never rely a purely online friend for more than psychological comforts and miscellaneous entertainments. I can't actually do anything to help them but offer my own misguided advice; often things better off figured out personally. My relationships irl can go much further, are much more stable, and actually benefit me greatly. I can get those individuals to help pay for things when I'm running low on money, I can drive them places if they can't themselves. And if I ever entered a relationship, I could never have a family with a person online.

      I don't know what I'm really saying here since it's too late at night to be thinking about this stuff, but I probably got my thoughts out here.
      kyuukestu, AliceShiki and hitedo like this.
    8. kyuukestu Sep 1, 2019
      Well, I suppose that now depends on what you're calling a 'real' relationship.

      If we're going to say that only relationships where you know the person and meet them face-to-face are 'real' relationships, then I suppose there's nothing we can do about that ~w~

      in the end, I guess it's really up to each individual to define their own relationships.

      @AliceShiki
      AliceShiki and hitedo like this.
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