Wrecked

I always pretending watching something tragic in my phone just to cry.
Because I couldn't find a quiet place to hide.
The people who saw me just shrug and walk away.
After seeing them ignoring me, I felt relieve and the same time trapped.

Trapped in an open space where everyone could see me bawling my eyes.
And can't find a place to hide.
Always doing this just to release some of the heavy emotions
That's killing me slowly.

Until one day I noticed I'm starting to use a mask.
A mask trying to laugh off or use a joking tone
To make it looked like that I'm doing fine
Even I do not.

Then cry again after they're gone, using the same old method.
Suddenly I feel numb.
Everything become silent.
Blankly staring at the phone, erasing all the things in my head
I stand up and walk aimlessly.