Corrupt a Wish

Granted. Congratulations, the entirety of Earth just conglomerated into a giant 1 and is now planet Numeritron enemies to those of Alphabetrium! (Rick and Morty anyone?)

I wish for The biggest Strawberry rhubarb pie ever created.

 

granted, you find out the universe is a microverse in the shape of a strawberry rhubarb pie, just cuz

I wish for a new identity

 

Granted, you are now a crumb on the bottom of @Svalinn 's shoe.

I wish for the most supreme toaster know or unknown to man.

 

Granted, but it always holds bread for too long.

I wish for good grades in this current exam session.

 

granted, you are accused of cheating though

I wish for a pet duck

 

Granted but it's an annoying donald duck.

I wish I wasn't born.

 

granted, you find out that your just a clone of your original self

I wish for meaning in my life

 

Granted. You got “meaning” tattooed on your heart.

I wish for sausage.

 

Granted, everything you own is now constructed of sausages.

I wish that my car never ran out of gas.

 

granted, but it can never move nor the gas can be extracted

I wish I can eat and digest anything

 

Granted. Not sure what an anything is, but if you find it, you’d surely be able to eat and digest it!

I wish the mail was delivered via squads of delivery dogs.

 

Granted. They're police dogs too, and they always bark to indicate you have drugs on you. Oh, and they tackle you to the ground each time.

I wish happiness didn't exist.

 

granted, everyone's now gay and joyful

I wish for a indomitable body

 

Granted But you become Spongebob Squarepants

I wish for nothing.

 

granted


I wish to forget all the memes

 

Granted but from now on you'll live in a dead meme world

I wish my wish would not be granted

 

okay, you stop wishing since there's no point in making it anyways

I wish streetlamps were powered by gigantic fireflies

 

granted, but giant moths keep on smothering them

I wish for more penguins in the world

 

granted, prepare for the great penguin invasion where all of humanity was reduced to a few fishing towns made to fish for food for the great penguin overlords

I wish for a world war fought with pillows.

 

granted, they're stuffed with left over nuclear waste though

I wish for the god emperor of the universe to show up