[Poll] Could you cook to save your life?

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by lychee, Nov 14, 2019.

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How confident are you that you could cook a restaurant-quality meal in this setting?

  1. 1000% - My cooking is BETTER than restaurant quality! In fact I am a MASTER CHEF!

    6 vote(s)
    5.7%
  2. 200% - I'm confident my cooking would be better than restaurant quality

    3 vote(s)
    2.8%
  3. 100% - I think my cooking would be restaurant quality

    6 vote(s)
    5.7%
  4. 90% - I think my cooking would be nearly restaurant quality

    6 vote(s)
    5.7%
  5. 75% - I think my cooking would be better than the average Earth family's meal

    10 vote(s)
    9.4%
  6. 50% - I think my cooking would be about as good as an average Earth family's meal

    29 vote(s)
    27.4%
  7. 25% - I think my cooking would be worse than an average Earth family's meal

    14 vote(s)
    13.2%
  8. 10% - My cooking would be pretty bad but I can cook

    15 vote(s)
    14.2%
  9. 5% - I can cook... instant ramen? But I'd be screwed here.

    9 vote(s)
    8.5%
  10. 1% - I can cook microwavable meals? But I'd be screwed here.

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  11. 0% - I can't cook to save my life

    3 vote(s)
    2.8%
  12. I'm unsure

    1 vote(s)
    0.9%
  13. I do not wish to answer

    2 vote(s)
    1.9%
  14. I would try to fight the monster or run away

    2 vote(s)
    1.9%
  1. The Hamster Overlord

    The Hamster Overlord Mad scientist/Revered wizard/Alleged antichrist

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    Cooking? Eh, I can only almost magically turn food into poisonous charcoal! *proudly lifts nose*
     
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  2. Azninvasion

    Azninvasion Well-Known Member

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    I work as a sushi chef in a relatively fancy restaurant so I can hold my own with fish but I would prefer to cook other meats like poultry and have yet to learn how to butcher that otherwise I’m in good hands
     
  3. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    I'm a solid cook, but the only proteins I know how to cook without processing would be eggs and seafood. So I'm very limited in my selection there. And by solid cook, I mean in terms of being about average household level.
     
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  4. lychee

    lychee [- slightly morbid fruit -] ❀[ 恋爱? ]❀

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    I kind of blanked on oil for a little bit -- because I don't know how to make vegetable oil. Butter is out of the question for me too, because I don't know how to churn it.

    But then I remembered that you can render fat.

    ...So I would probably take an entire pig and cut off pieces of fat just for oil. :notlikeblob::notlikeblob::notlikeblob:

    ...It's such a waste of a pig though.......
     
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  5. Arcturus

    Arcturus Cat, Hidden Sith Lord

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    Excuse me, let me rephrase this, The only proteins I know how to process from base materials are eggs and seafood(and by that I mean some fish, crab, lobster, and mussels).
     
  6. lychee

    lychee [- slightly morbid fruit -] ❀[ 恋爱? ]❀

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    So here's how to make your own vegetable oil, but you need an oil press.

    Since I kind have a hobby from making everyone from scratch... the oil press would be a problem for me because I'm not sure how that's made.

    Google... gooogle... goooogle... nom....

    The metal pipe version are probably not very feasible for a backyard version. The most primitive version I could find was this:

     
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  7. OldManGu

    OldManGu Legendary Member

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    This is all that I need to eat upload_2019-11-13_21-32-48.gif
     
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  8. lychee

    lychee [- slightly morbid fruit -] ❀[ 恋爱? ]❀

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  9. Tilgarial

    Tilgarial [Chaos Tiger] [Paradox] [ded][Houseplant]

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    1.
    beef stew
    2.
    Salad!!
    3.
    Depends on how active the restaurant is. Or if i can hire people or not
    4.
    Eh, money aint that important
    5.
    Hire people when it gezs too much to handle xD


    Also, I may be oddly prepared for this scenario. Its kinda weirding me out
     
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  10. ludagad

    ludagad Addicted to escapist novels

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    Cooking isn't that hard if you know the major principles and what goes with what. It's not like being a master chef, where you also have to be innovative and mix up a godly sauce. So, the average restaurant level is still possible. I do like to read lots of recipes and trying them out with some adjustments. Eating tasty food is pleasure to me, so absolutely no sweat in this setting. But as someone mentioned earlier - the prep (washing, cutting, peeling etc) and cleaning up afterwards are the more bothersome parts.

    1. I'll make teriyaki chicken and egg fried rice with veggies. It's quick enough.
    2. Can cook decently. Best thing, err, the most practice I got was on oven-baked veggies and various salads.
    3. Might as well operate the restaurant and hope the isekai world's restaurants business sucks so I have no competition. I'd hire help for the dirty work tho.
    4. Yeah, I'll try to turn over a profit eventually.
    5. Clean it up, make room for a separate area where you can get more privacy. Get a fan over the grill, so the smell of grilled meat wafts outside to seduce customers. Have promotions and daily lunch menu. Offer takeouts. Half price after 19 so I don't waste food.
     
    Last edited: Nov 14, 2019
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  11. VesperNyan

    VesperNyan Well-Known Member

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    1. What would you try making for the Monster?
    Fresh Monster liver sashimi with some fava beans and nice chianti

    2. Can you cook? Are you good at cooking? What is the best thing you can cook?

    Im not a five star chef, but I can pull my own weight. I can do Chinese and British cuisine very well, but sucks at Italian.

    3. Could you run a restaurant if it came down to it? In this isekai world, would you continue operating the restaurant or would you try to do something else with your life?


    I can cook but running a restaurant is a whole different ballpark. There is a lot of logistics involved and customer service. I would rather be a gourmet hunter who hunts monsters for clothes ripping experience like in food war or Toriko. Also do I have magic?

    4. Suppose a week later, a debt collector comes knocking at your door and they want you to pay rent. You find out that this restaurant is still under mortgage, and the rent payment alone takes up the majority of your income (almost no pocket money left). Would you keep running the restaurant even if it doesn't seem like you're making money?

    Can I cook the debt collector? Im sure he will go nice with something light maybe debt tartar.

    5. How would you try to improve your tavern/inn operations?

    Serve the bipedal shee.... I mean "guest" some delicacies that will be to die for...hehe
     
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  12. OldManGu

    OldManGu Legendary Member

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    Best cook ever upload_2019-11-13_21-38-8.jpeg
     
  13. thepope

    thepope Well-Known Member

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    I would cook like a master chef. It would look like one of those running gags when FL try to cook and the meal takes you down to 9 hells...
     
  14. jcochran

    jcochran Member

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    Looks like it's time to break out the lethal chef trope. I think a nicely decorative serving of improperly prepared fugu would serve nicely. The time oven would also allow a nice Clostridium botulinum culture to add a bit of extra flavor.
     
    Last edited: Nov 14, 2019
  15. natsume142

    natsume142 だが、断る

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    I can cook things I like to eat, thing I hate? No ways not gonna cook or learn about it.
     
  16. Astaroth

    Astaroth empty

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    Considering how basically every restaurant I've ever been to has been pretty meh I'd say I'd probably manage.

    My only real issue would be butchering I guess, but since there's an infinite amount of attempts or at least 'resources' I should be fine so long as there's not some kind of 20 minute deadline.


    So does flour count as a processed good? I mean it should (when I think about it), but for some reason it doesn't feel like you thought about it.


    Probably something with minced or ground meats, since I'm not as confident in butchering. At least for my very first try I should play something safe.

    If there's yeast I might make some pizza, or since there's probably no ready-made flour I'd probably save that for another time when my life isn't on the line. Also if there's no yeast then I'd give making some starters (with that time acceleration oven) some tries, I've thought about making sourdough bread and pizza several times but don't really want to spend all that time and waste so much flour in case it ends up not being good... (I've had over-proofed doughs with yeast quite a few times and I really don't like it when it becomes sour.)

    Well yeah, definitely above average I'd say (especially when taking into account all the peeps who can't cook at all). Though I don't actually like to cook, it's more like I just cook cause I need to eat and most other people's food is pretty meh so I end up being "forced" to cook... (Though I do bake cakes and sweets etc. every so often, but that doesn't really count as food imo.)

    Since i mostly just care about the taste and don't actually care about or enjoy cooking (especially not cleaning afterwards) I tend to just make simple dishes and especially if it's going to be lunch or dinner I'll make a huge batch and freeze so I don't have to cook for another week+.

    So usually it's something like a big (really big) pot of bolognese/meat sauce and then just cook some pasta each time. Unfortunately others get sick of eating the same thing every day so I have to make other stuff as well, but I've probably made meat sauce the most. So that should be my "best" dish so to speak.


    With that said, obviously if I could get ANY food without any cost etc. I'd be grilling Wagyu beef steaks every single day, grilling steaks is about as easy and simple as cooking can get, and still it's probably one of the foods that's taste the best, the only problem is how it's pretty expensive to be eating steaks... (Not to mention wagyu ofc)

    And with the time acceleration oven I'd finally get to try dry aged steaks without feeling like I'm throwing money down the toilet (and ofc not have to wait a week-month+)


    So long as its only cooking, sure. And well I guess I might have trouble with sanitary inspections, especially if I have to clean the place...

    But assuming I could live and cook there without having to do anything else then I might just become a foodie...


    I don't see how it could ever be possible to not make money if I can make any kind of raw ingredient appear, but either way I don't really spend any money of anything besides food and rent in the first place, so I wouldn't have a problem with not making money.

    Especially not if there's no computer or games to buy in the other world. Then I'd literally have nothing to buy or spend money on in the first place...

    I probably wouldn't :blobxd:
     
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  17. lychee

    lychee [- slightly morbid fruit -] ❀[ 恋爱? ]❀

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    Nope! You’re a weak flimsy human!

    You wouldn’t have known this without exploring, but you got dumped in the middle of the demon lord’s continent, and there are monsters/demons everywhere.

    The power gap is ridiculous and you’re basically walking free food for monsters in most places.

    The only reason why the restaurant exists is because a certain demon lord developed an odd taste for human food, so he created a magical restaurant that you wouldn’t ordinarily find anywhere else, and it’s outfitted with a ton of insanely expensive magical appliances. The restaurant has a special ability that causes it to summon a human if it doesn’t have one, so monsters are used to walking into the restaurant to bully the human (who’ve they’ve never seen before) into making them something.

    The human of the restaurant is technically also expendable. If the monsters hate the current proprietor (or their cooking sucks), they’ll just kill the owner and a few days later a new human will be summoned.

    The restaurant also has an “owner” system. If you walk greater than a kilometer or so away from the restaurant, the restaurant assumes you’re dead and you lose the ability to access the restaurant/lock the doors/power the magical appliances and you aren’t the owner anymore — and a few days later a new human will be summoned.
     
    Last edited: Nov 14, 2019
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  18. Astaroth

    Astaroth empty

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    So an oil press wouldn't apply to what you said earlier?
    For me personally it wouldn't really matter though, I'd be using fat and make butter regardless. Only reason I ever use cooking oil is because of the price (except olive oil) and smoke point (except olive oil :p) and that's not really an issue.

    Like basically anything becomes better with butter, and there can never be too much butter...
     
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  19. Liyus

    Liyus Laksha's Desu~ Cat

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    1000% - My cooking is BETTER than restaurant quality! In fact I am a MASTER CHEF!
    are you asking why i chose this? It's because for me good cooking is the one that can stuff my stomach, the small and expensive portion of a restarant doesn't qualify.......quantity = quality.....
     
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  20. lychee

    lychee [- slightly morbid fruit -] ❀[ 恋爱? ]❀

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    No, you’re right. There would be an oil press in the kitchen.

    Making stuff from scratch is just my hobby. :blobsweat_2:
     
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