Spoiler: Rant One desire is a human desire and the other desire is also human, yet both desires are extreme opposites! The former selfish and the latter selfless. Ah, near morning and slept not a wink I have, as pass midnight thoughts dull my reasoning below normalcy. You see~ I reaffirm my belief that humans are a mistake. They make no reason other than create reason to be unreasonable~ Ah, quite a messed up sentient life-form, are we? Speak, what says the flesh to covet the flesh yet the spirit hungers the spirit? Too many skeletons, too many hearts devoured~ Truth! I desire truth! I desire the ultimate and absolute! I desire it All! Why? Why? Disappointment on humans including my lowly self! Woe~ woe! I want to protect yet harm? I want to create yet destroy? I laughed at my stupidity, because I don't know what I truly want anymore... no more. Why can't we be just one thing, and not everything? A mistake was made, I, if not we, shall correct this mistake. Illogical. Unreasonable. Indescribable. Meaningless. Unnecessary. All but words and abstractions, not real at all. Make it unreal; all become unreal. Unreality. Null. Empty. Void. Nothing. I desire nothing? Everything is something... maybe one dawn or dusk, all will cease to exist, and so shall me as well. Peace. Paradise. Grant me eternal rest. No life. No death. Just nothingness, O World. My bad, forget the rant I made above, but this thread asks our fellow members what are you most conflicting desires that make you remember you're human? Mine are innocence and corruption; to make the world without faults yet to make faults in the world.
When i bought cars from someone who desperately needed money to pay for his mother hospital fee when his debt interest already close to liquidated it. Bought them dirt cheap. Problem is neither i had the money to help him paying more than i could at the time.
lurking in the forum or reading a novel, or more likely lowest kind of time killing procrastination or trying to practice productivity even if it isn't
Very poetic (the rant) I think I might have written something similar in my diary a few years back... we probably all have felt like that at some point. On your question: I wish I was not a responsible adult sometimes. But during my childhood I was often more “mature” than the childish me now.
Actually it's quite simple. There are things we want. But we don't like the cost at which they come. So you may like a Ferrari or a Bugatti, but they cost a shit load of money. A shit load of money would require you to work your ass off for several dozen years while pitifully spending your life on a measly amount of money. The cost is just unbearable. A more realistic example is of fitness. Who wouldn't like a fit body? The iconic six packs? Those biceps and triceps? But they want some work done. Not one day but every day, for hours long. They require literal sweat and time and you go through pain. You want the body. You do. But the cost is just unbearable. The same can be said about abstract concepts too. I would love to be innocent and gullible. But the cost of that would be easily manipulatable at the hands of people and be harmed by them. The cost is unbearable. So I would like to be innocent but I would like to be cunning. Innocent because that is how I want to be. Cunning because the cost of being innocent is unbearable. Us, humans have the tendency to avoid pain. This is a psychological rule. You know the adverts that go like this 'Learn English in 90days' or do that in 90days or heal cancer with no medication. They are cashing out on this very principle. It's like the ads 'grow inches through this weird trick', or 'they tried to shut down this grandma's traditional beauty recipe to grow beautiful overnight'. We want the benefit but we want to skip the work. We want a '4' but we aren't willing to add '2+2'. We just want that '4' delivered to us magically. Hence the conflict.
I wanna sit in front of my laptop 24/7 but I need to go to work in order to get money to pay the bill
Abhorring corruption in general and yet greatly revelling in corrupting, mostly sexually. Like watching a drop of the darkest ink fall on the whitest cloth. Ah, the delicious feeling of making someone fall into darkness...
Ignores rant because of sleepiness* Is the conflict you speak of about the choice I have to make every day about what spread I want on my bread sandwich but after half an hour of wasting time I bitterly smash it all in a bunch and gobble it up?