How realistic would be a character that created an benevolent image of her/his abuser of sorts in her/his memories? Would a setting influence such image or overall life style? I wrote a character, who was liberated from slavery at age of 7 by her adopted father, who immediately appointed her as his heir. She was then trained harshly, getting seriously hurt during those training sessions and disciplined with beating for any small mistake during training. By age of 10 the character became a disciplined soldier and a decent commander (but awful combatant because of physical limitations). Afterwards she was sent to learn magic... After a long time the character believed that her father was a loving and caring man who gave her everything in her life, including her strength and power. I was said that my character is kind of nuts. P.S. The setting was your classic darkish fantasy where monsters run rampaging and nobles has a lot of political and military power because of it.
Makes sense to me. Severely(?) abused in slavery to only moderately abused once out of it. It's all about perception.
I say make her know/realize the truth and get an emotional breakdown which causes her to become twisted or some sort of a maniac obsessed with power and then make her reach the top tricking and sacrificing all those that caused her pain
Objectively, the purpose is a border. If training doesn't serve the purpose, it is an abuse. Subjectively, feel free to write all the shit you like, because Stockholm syndrome is a thing, and she could've mistaken anything for kindness and it will be funny to use further into the story. @Edit. I mean, it's not really unrealistic to think: "Damn, my guardians were 'discipline nutjobs', but thanks to them going spartan i'm where i am."
Most discipline is abuse. Also, if you want to use punishment to teach something to someone, it won’t be very effective. Positive reinforcement is much more effective
It's not like that . there is a difference between being hard on a child to make them better at something ( maybe to insure a good future ) and just beating them for fun I think that it's a realistic to love her father as she grows up and realize that it was all for her good
I mean, she kinda got some benefits, right? Dad might be harsh, but at least she got to improve her life once it's over.
If they're seriously considering self-maiming or suicide repeatedly and sometimes even act on it, it's abuse. Anything up to that point is based on each individual case.
welp i think you should set a timeline setting for it. . . coz the view point of people in older times are considered to be harsh in the view point of people now. . . but at that time it is just normal everyday for them. . .
I think she would have a deep respect for her adoptive father, and maybe a principled kind of love. I don't think she would understand or have a familial love for him.
The setting is simple, it is darkish fantasy. The overall level of security is extremely low. Monsters can attack and overrun villages even in highly developed territories. Public security in general is bad.
Whether it is abuse or discipline really depends on the motivation and also the setting of the society. It would be abuse when there is no real reason behind. But discipline can also be debated. Like barely a century ago in my country, it was okay for a teacher to beat unruly students with a stick for disobeying but nowadays, just seperate fighting students by pushing them away may end up with the risk of their overprotective parents calling for lawyers As long as your worldsetting matches, then it should work out. In dark fantasy, the risk of dying for being weak is higher and therefore those teaching methods probably won't count as going overboard.
Abuse start when they are asking the children something unreasonable and getting punished for failing.