Does that count as consent?

It's the Public Standing Offer, she will only do it with the guy she approves. Damn it business knowledge.

 

If she'd replace the word "want" with the word "allow", then that is consent. Otherwise, no.

'Wanting' and 'agreeing to' are different things. For example, a person might say "I really want someone to give me a puppy as a present right now" but it doesn't mean that they are allowed to keep the puppy, can afford to keep the puppy and were serious about wanting the puppy. Forcing a puppy on them without confirming that they can and agree to keep it could lead to puppy being neglected or even dead.

Don't do things that make puppies dead.

 

Please be responsible and have the puppy neutered. Remember, the PETA is watching you...

 

There are a few things.

First, I would argue that it's wrong to assume consent unless you're 100% clear that you have consent.

Clearly, the guy in your scenario misinterpreted something, because otherwise the woman would not have claimed there wasn't consent after the fact. It is still the top's burden of responsibility to ensure that there isn't a misunderstanding. If you decided to take the risk to assume unilaterally that your partner gave you consent without confirming it, then it's your responsibility if you were wrong. It literally takes a single sentence (or a few words) to confirm it -- and it's your negligence when the scenario is such that there is not enough time/opportunity or it's not easy for the other party to voice their own objection.

If there is any degree of doubt, regardless of what it feels like to you, it's possible that it still feels like rape to your partner. If the idea of being a rapist sounds sickening to you, then maybe the conscientious thing to do would be to stop if there's the slightest amount of doubt it isn't consensual.

The scenario is definitely on the extreme side, but realistically I've heard of many cases that were like this where one party misinterpreted that consent was given when really it was not.

Let me given an example:

Person A: "Do you think I'm fuckable?"

Person B: "Haha, yeah, I think you're pretty hot."

Person A: "Guess who else is pretty hot in this room?"

Person B: "Mhmm, I dunnooo~" *flirty*

Person A: *Proceeds to kiss and make out*

(scene skip)

Person A: *Pants start to come off*

Person B: "...Uh, why are you stripping? Sorry, but I'm not interested in sex right now."

Person A: "Huh? What? I thought you said you wanted to do it."

Person B: "........No I didn't........"​

This kind of thing is incredibly common, and outside of the scenario you gave, the only thing I'm really asking for is to make sure you have proper communication with whoever your sexual partners are. You are literally asking for problems if you decide that you don't need communication in your sexual relationships. Misunderstandings WILL happen (sooner or later), and even if it doesn't result in rape or something extreme, in all likelihood your relationship is going to run into problems sooner or later.

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Second, consent can be retracted after it is given.

People can change their mind, and you'd be an asshole if you continued when the other people is clearly screaming no/stop (unless you have some kind of pre-existing BDSM arrangement/agreement of some kind).

Similarly speaking, consent given yesterday doesn't imply consent today, among many other things.

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Third, as @MangoGuy said, consent can't be given by someone who is mentally impaired.

Alcohol is the most common scenario, but it isn't restricted to this. Lots of things can cause cognitive or mental impairment.

If you suspect that that your partner is mentally whoozy, then you shouldn't take what they say as consent.

 

Let's make it more clear with my opening post: the woman didn't say or give any signs that she wants to retract this possible consent.

Also, if she said something like "I offer my virginity right here and now to the first available guy! I want it dirty baby!", I think that is pretty much a sign of consent!

 

One reason I am asking this hypothetical is so I could use it to rebutt 1 of those hardcore feminists that are strong adherents of #MeToo.

 

Or intoxication.

 

When I say she doesn't show signs, this means that that fight or flight thing is not taking place and she was devoid of any intoxication or mental conditions when she shouted such a declaration. It was more of her saying something stupid.

 

Um, honestly it depends on your point of view.

A lot of guys misunderstand gestures or reactions from their partners during sex.

Like if she squirms and flails with her arms -- does that mean "more" or "too much"?

Some women can be screamers during sex -- so does that mean they're enjoying it or hating it?

Others can completely freeze up like a rock -- so is this how she regularly acts or did you strike some PTSD or something?

Frankly, it's impossible to know unless you've been with your partner for a while. A sexual relationship with someone is a learning process, and every person is different. You really shouldn't be assuming certain reactions are consent or isn't consent from the first time. It takes time to learn about another person intimately, and if you're a good partner in any way, you should be trying to figure out what your partner likes and doesn't like -- because everyone has things that they like/dislike sexually.

My problem with this scenario is that you're pushing the female character to the point of pure fantasy that you'd start to wonder if such a woman actually exists in reality.

When you construct such an extreme fantasy character, the inferences you make start to become irrelevant to reality.

Like I can give a counter-example:

Imagine a naked guy who hides in the broom closet in a department wearing underwear on his head. Every time a woman walks by, he opens the door and covers her mouth with a piece of chloroform and drags her into the closet to do XXXX-rated things. He does this continually until there's a pile of about ten bodies in the closet and then he douses everything with oil and sets it on fire. After that, he runs around the mall with a machine gun and shoots everybody on sight, but preferring to shoot women because he's a misogynist. After killing around 50 people he shoots himself because it's a shame to the hentai god if the police take him alive.

...What's wrong with a hypothetical scenario like this?

A guy like this probably doesn't exist in reality. So why even bother????

 

With my example, the women's body language/gestures indicate she wants more (from an arguably objective standpoint) and so does the look on her face. The only thing that is absent is her verbally saying "Yes". Compared to your example, my example has the woman saying she wants her virginity taken. So, whether or not that that is legally consent is debatable. However, one might say that her declaration might have been consent from a practical standpoint.

 

But this is exactly the problem with prevailing sexual culture.

The female body can sometimes make reflexive physiologic reactions regardless of what the woman thinks.

I don't know how many times I've heard the argument: "Because she was wet, it must have meant she wanted it!"

But that's a myth! It's soooo wrong and so misunderstood that it's a legitimate issue. There's all these men all over the world who think that a woman gives her consent if her body reacts favorably, but that's simply and flatly not true.

 

Well, given that my thread here is out there, all the body signs that would indicate she wants more are happening. The woman might say after they finish that "while I may have not said verbally to continue or stop, my body language was saying to continue and I should have verbally said that I want you to continue".

 

I mean all I'm really trying to encourage is communication between sexual partners.

Sex isn't completely silent (e.g. dirty talk!), and realistically most people won't be during the process.

If I were a man having sex with a woman who was inexperienced, I would be concerned if she wasn't responding verbally or freezing up -- because maybe that means it hurts for her or she isn't ready/felt pressured into sex/wants to do it to please her partner even though she really doesn't want to personally.

And honestly with the last example -- maybe not everybody would agree with me -- but you would be an asshole of a sexual partner if you didn't care about what the other side felt and decided to keep going for your own pleasure regardless of how the other is feeling (consent formally given, or not).

Sexual relationships are complicated, and if you're the more experienced party (regardless of gender), then you should be taking every effort to make sure that the experience is enjoyable for both yourself and your sexual partner.

 

Brain Damage...

 

Idk how it's going in US, but it's difficult to say since the legislature regarding sexual abuse is still a wip in my country. From the existing jurisprudence, it's far more likely that the judges would say that the woman have already given her 'consent' to the man, although there's so many problem with that kind of thinking. But the most common problem about rape cases was the matter of witnesses. Since this scenario happens in a public area, the testimony from the witnesses regarding the woman's consent (aside from testifying that it's a "publicly immoral act") can be regarded as either a blessing or a curse since the one of the most important point in the court, after all, are evidences.

I completely agree with this regarding consent.

This is what rapists mainly say to defend themselves. The thing is, what kind of 'body signs' that would indicate that the woman has given her consent? keep in mind that there are some body reactions that actually happens outside whether the woman consented the sex or not, and that doesn't mean that she have consented, and couldn't and shouldn't be counted as unspoken consent .

 

Please and thank you to the mod that locks this thread! I think this thread has served its purpose, I guess.

 

For the record, Ai-chan hasn't yelled out in public that Ai-chan wanted to have sex. Ai-chan is quite comfortable with the quality and volume of Ai-chan's sex life. After all, how many here can claim to have had sex with a hot girl and her mother in the same day?

But yes, Ai-chan has had sex in a public place before. Ai-chan has had sex in public many times before, if a nudist island is considered a public place. That nudist resort in Ai-chan's profile page isn't just there to sit pretty yo! Now that is a place that Ai-chan did say, "I want many dicks!"

 

Lewd Ai-chan. Too lewd.