[Poll] Would you join the dark side when you die?

This poll isn't about evil at all!

The other day you were walking home from school/work and on the opposite side of the street, you saw Truck-kun hurtling towards an old grandma with a baby carriage. Oh no! At the last moment a magical girl appeared out of the nowhere and *flipped* the 12-wheel trailer truck out of the way, thus saving the day.

...until the flying Truck did several somersaults through the air and crashed straight into the sidewalk... right on top of your head.

You died instantaneously. Official cause of death: Truck-kun.

Anyways, since you were hit by Truck-kun, you figured that a goddess would probably come to get you reincarnated into an isekai world anytime now... but unfortunately that didn't happen either. God wasn't interested in your resume.

However, Satan (the god of all evil) was.

Basically the summary of Satan's reincarnation offer was that the Forces of Evil were re-building their undead army (again), blah blah blah blah... zombies... skeletons... goblins... orcs... you get the picture. In either case, the bad guys were recruiting to fill those massive cannon fodder golden horde armies of millions again, and Satan was offering pretty much every soul that died an opportunity to reincarnate as a foot soldier of the Dark Side.

If you accept the offer, you will get reincarnated as one of the weakest types of evil creatures (note: exactly which one is somewhat unclear) -- but retain all of your memories from your past life.

If you reject the offer, you will just die normally -- and since God rejected you already, there won't be any reincarnation whatsoever.

Satan is quite blunt that the Dark Side is quite a lawless and violent place. Might makes right in his kingdom, and basically everything will suck horribly unless you somehow become stronger than everyone else.

The method to gain power is to eat the heart of your enemies in order to absorb their strength. Additionally, if you fail to eat any human or demon hearts for a period of time (~2-3 months) you will starve to death. In short, this is the kind of setting where you have to kill or die.
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Do you accept Satan's reincarnation offer?

 

What does "the weakest type of evil creature" entail?
Goblin, Kobold, Slime, etc?

 

Dunno~~ I don't know my fantasy evil monsters well enough?

Maybe I'll just edit the OP and just say "one of the weakest types" -- so there's ambiguity about exactly which one -- the point is just a weak mob minion monster!

 

Says the guy with an avatar of devil... I probably would try to thrive, most likely to die...

 

Sounds like a very sucky life. I'd rather just be dead tbh

 

Pretty much this. Heck, I'm not even gonna be paid in PWP BL doujinshis! No waaayyyyyy

 

@Satan she's using your name again

 

It's an environment of bloodshed to survive. Do not worry, it's only every 2-3 months in devouring a human or demon's heart. If one were smart, they could create an environment or a certain something that would grow said hearts.

 

I will leave that to my soul to decide because I won't have any brains anyway.

 

Eat the heart of my enemy?
Nope, i don't even like chiken heart so no thank you

 

Pass, no benefits and will likely just end up in oblivion soon there after with more negative karma for my next existence.

 

Wait, why would I accept the devil's offer right after dying? That seems like a fairly obvious test to me.

 

Hey! The last time I used @Satan in a thread was all the way back in 2016!!!!!!

 

Man, it's just meat. All you have to do is figure out how to cook it the way you like it

"God wasn't interested in your resume"

 

So I was right.

 

Now what is Karma? Is it not the ability or measurement of one's ability to do the role they had in life? That way it affects their next life due to how well they did.

 

This is a scam. If satan is asking you to join hell to means that he didn't have the right to just take you. Chances are good that you were headed to a good place. Die in his army and you... End up back with him? No. Satan needs a better con.

 

There's no proof at that, and rejecting the devil might just be the thing that gets my resume accepted? I don't know but I'll still hope for those things.

 

Hey if I was Satan. You'd take me for a great guy. I mean if you strive to survive, I'd applaud you for it. If I was the God of All Evil, I'd give every reincarnator some insurance, give them a chance to acquire a power they desire greatly, I can't just give it freely you have to prove worthy. Though, I wouldn't act idiotically like Rodcorte or Alda, I wouldn't try to guide you into doing something I wanted you to do, I'd help guide you into doing what you wanted to do while also having you help me so that you do some things I want you to do along the way. Life must be enjoyable for you to help me and I help you. Simply because Evil and Life have always been together, in order to live one must have a hint of evil. Live and Evil are anagrams. Evil has always been done in life, no helping it. Evil always finds a way~

A con, you're in the midst of the God of All Evil's divine realm. All he has to do is snap his fingers and poof. The only way I could see you getting out of this deal is gain the blessings of another God while in his army. Hey, the God of All Evil has all of evil serving him, it doesn't matter what you do, in some aspect of your life you will be evil. Whether you like it or not, it's subjective.

What is God going to do to save you from Satan? Nothing. Why? Because Satan works in God's order, simple as that. Unless you're saying Satan will send you to God if you reject.

 

Well, given that my understanding of Satan is usually a being designed to temp man so we can learn and become stronger, so I don't see why it would be any different in this case. Also, working for basically anyone is better than working for satan so I'll just try my luck.