Discussion I have a relationship question?

They say opposite attracts. I find this to be true, but in a long term relationship. Shouldn’t you also have a few common interest as well?
Thanks for all the advice

 

Nope I don't want to be in a relationship at all
Single day s the best

 

Single life does have its advantages, but so does relationship. So I understand

 

I think I'd need to have a few common interests to talk about or else the relationship will just be sooo awkward

 

From my experiance, interests do matter, but it's the people that matter the most. My wife and myself did share some common interests at first, but had quite some different ones, too.

Over time we explored both fields together and now have quite some things we enjoy doing together. On the other hand, we're the kind of couple that spend any free minute together, so maybe that's not the best excample ^^'

 

For a long term relationship you need a balance of things you can do together while also being able to do things apart. This balance is different for people, but if the only things you do together are sex, you aren't going to last long.

That being said there is a simple question you can ask yourself. Do you want to spend time with your partner or do anything else? If the answer is "anything else" most times this is not a long term relationship waiting to happen.

 

That is one of biggest lies that alot if not most of the people believe, opposite attracts only true when talking about different immune system XD
Look it up or read this if you want

 

I have a buttload of things in common with my boyfriend, and I never felt as attached to someone as I am to him, so... I dunno, I feel like I am more attracted to people that are similar to me than people that are my opposite~

 

Opposites attract is for personalities~ Not for interests!
Aki thinks opposite interests sounds super silly! If someone likes swimming, what is the opposite? Drowning? Being interested in someone who likes drowning sounds like a short term relationship.

 

personally you don't neet to have a common interest, learning and understanding each other interests and hobbies can be joyful and rewarding experience.

 

I am single as dollar and not looking for change.

 

Not complete opposites...some people like to argue so they can end up with a person that always has something different to say so they argue in good fun.
Another example of opposites is probably more common, leader and follower, the one who wears the pants and the one who doesn't, dom and sub but it doesn't have to be really kinky. Some people just don't wanna decide anything and some people want to take control.

If a couple is starting to date, everything seems fine but then it gets more serious, they start sharing stuff, living together a for weekends or more... but then they realise they both wanna be in charge....not good. While a compromise is possible, if it's favoring one side too much and that one isn't reasonable or fair, resentment will grow, this person will start tallying everytime they gave in for the sake of their relationship and then one day they explode.

There are some things that are core, you can't have these to be opposites. I haven't really thought about this much but for example lazy + active person. At worst case the relationship will work but the active person will stop keeping fit, going to various activities the enjoy and just end up at home with the lazy person getting their life sucked out. Think about it, active person will try to get lazy to become active, they will likely fail and eventually lose motivation to those activities themselves because the one they spend the most time with, their environment is negative.

 

My cousin and her husband are opposites and are always fiercely fighting (according to what I heard from my mom). I personally think it’s better to be with someone similar to you, as you will get along more comfortably. For example, Mr. Hamster and I are both introverts, but because of that, we got along just fine during lock down and didn’t get on each other’s nerves. Meanwhile, my more extroverted than me but still introverted ex-step mom has been driven up the wall lately by her extraverted husband. Also, without common interests, Mr. Hamster and I would have nothing to talk about. I’m sure there’s things we talk about to each other that the other person finds boring, but we at least have things we can talk about and find interesting.

 

I'd say yes. I had lots of different interests and opinions with my ex. It was fun with all the banter going on about different topics but at the end of the day, what made that relationship last long are those common interests that felt like a safe zone. It's was comforting to know that there is someone who will understand how crazy you can be about certain things and why.

It's really really really hard when someone doesn't know/understand/agree with your entire being. It's like you can hear the disapproval in their voice even before they start talking and that just... hurts.

 

What about your "Y"?

 

The two people in a relationship might not be perfect for each other. Infact, more often than not they aren't. There's always someone out there who'd probably be a better fit for you out there.

Relationships don't work out because of common interests or because you're polar opposites. Those are just the magnets that attract you to each other. To make a relationship work requires patience, understanding and forgiveness. This is what I've learned.

 

Thats an awesome post. Thanks