Discussion Love vs. Lust at First Sight

I've recently finished the novel: There is an Angel in that Church. I highly recommend you guys to read it. It will only take a few mins.
The characters talked to each other saying that love at first sight is not possible and that the feeling is actually lust.

What do you guys think? Is love at first sight possible? Or is it actually lust that we are experiencing?

 

I guess when you see a visually pleasing person you go "Oh, that person's a beaty" that's normal, and the 'love at first sight' thing is like when you see some1 who is like a personification of all your desires so to speak. (dunno how 2 phrase it) but u can either be "I wanna look, look, look, so gorgeous (ˉ﹃ˉ)" or you act on it (a.k.a love at first sight)

In short- your dream lover is your love (it's lust)

 

Magic exists, but those who have never experienced it do not believe in it, that is what makes it magic.

 

I believe that non-familial love requires understanding the other person. So no, I don't think love at first sight is possible, only lust.

 

Technically speaking I agree with this.
However, there's also several ocassion where they fall in love with what the person do, thus creating a deep impression that is not actually a first sight...

What gibberish am i talking about...
Well, let's just say I don't know

 

Don't think it is likely you will meet someone who fulfills all your desires.
Also that last line, are you saying that it is not possible to love someone without feeling any kind of lust for him/her? (Romantic sense btw, not referring to other types of love like familial)

Spoiler

no wincest gang here

 

I'd say lust + the assumptions you have about their personalities based on how they look.
They look cute and innocent, then they are an angel in your eyes. They are a good person, kind... because they look cute and innocent. And you will probably fit them into a box you like (the personality you assume they have is the one of your ideal partner.)

 

no, no, no I mean the love at first sight kind that u find in most stories. It IS possible to love some1 without lust but in that case wouldn't you have fallen in love with their personality? that means u've gotten 2 know that person and it's not 'love at first sight'

 

If love at first sight exists, I feel it must apply to all forms of love.
That means it should include friendship and familiar love. Have you ever looked at a person from across the room and thought, "yep, that's my brother now."?
It's certainly has happened with puppies and cats with me. One look and you melt and then they live with you and steal your pretzels and blankets.

 

It's tough for that to happen irl. In my experience, people who are good looking get with good looking people and that couples will be similar in terms of attractiveness.
Maybe the legendary childhood friend can thwart this

rip white text.
I have never met someone and immediately thought this guy is my brother/sister/friend. It has only happened with crushes which is why I'm thinking it isn't love at first sight.

 

With the way some stories are written, especially fan service-leaning ones, it can be hard to know if it is love or lust or even both at first sight.

 

It’s happened to me, although rarely. I’ve also met someone and thought they were an enemy at first sight. Fortunately that happened only once.

But no, I don’t believe in love at first sight. I’ve been attracted at first sight, but that isn’t really love.

 

If I put it into words - love starts as objectification (That thing is beautiful, I want that thing to be mine), idealization (That person looks perfect, everything about them must be perfect as well) and a degree of self-sacrifice and humility - a willingness to do something for that person, so they'll notice you and form a favorable opinion about you. Lust is rather straightforward - That person is sexy, I want to mix our genes.

 

it is possible for love at first sight also, love not same with lust or vice versa~ many may mistake it~ this cat suspect those who think love also lust is never see type such thing cuz as lover people will go snu snu maybe never see grandma or grandpa people who fall in love stuff, which too old to think about lust~

on another side love can start or born from lust or other way around, this cat suspect is the culprit for mindset love at first sight is lust... well not everyone think with their lower half, some do tho~

 

Well, romantic attraction is a thing as opposed to sexual attraction, even fully asexual people can have the former despite not feeling lust.
So I would absolutely not attribute "love at first sight" to just lust alone, although you can still question if it really is love or not prior to getting to know the person.

 

Lust at first sight is certainly possible.

Love at first sight is far less certain without objective ways to capture its presence.

But my response here isn't very relevant, sorry, because I experienced neither.

Had my heart flutter upon seeing a girl once, as a kid, and never again despite seeing her not long after that.

Whatever it is, treasure it. Both can lead to doing stupid shit, but its better than a pale life of nothing.

 

i always interpreted "love at first sight" as liking someone/something at the first meeting, but not to the point you call it love.

 

Since you are differentiating romantic and sexual attraction, is it fine to feel lust to someone other than your partner?

I think your definition of love is dangerous. If you impose your ideals onto your partner, you fail to recognize them as an individual with flaws. This can cause estrangement if not resolved.

Same thing happened to me but I quickly forgot those I fell for at first sight.

 

I don't know. Love and lust are the same without lust you cant fall in love with someone and love can lust because of jealousy.

You need to describe in your own way because you need that option to love and lust it.

 

I don't think there can ever be a definite answer to that question to be honest, it depends on how both persons in a relationship feel about it and if they are honest to each other.
I wouldn't consider it as something bad in for example an open relationship.