So earlier I made a post about how my bestfriend and me. I don't know but it's bothering me for quite some time. After following the advice, I changed my seatmate and everything was going well. But my bestfriend kept making comments about how sad she is to see me sitting next to someone else. I just thought she was joking with me. But my bestfriend claims that she is not doing well after changing seats. She's literally hates her seatmate and always fights with her. After changing seats and after we talked out, I thought she would stop interfering me, when I talk to my others friend but it's not even been a month since we changed seats. Yesterday when I was sitting in my seat, she just suddenly came to me and asked me to let her sit next to me. She already talked to the teacher about it. I don't know why but that just scared me. She scared me at that moment. She insisted on a while and I refused to sit behind me. I was so tensed up. Then she angrily went away. After some time, our teacher came and changed her seat to sit beside me. I thought she would be angry because I refused to let her sit next to me but surprisingly she didn't say anything. She would just lean on me, play with my hairs or touch my arms at random moments and this makes me uncomfortable. None of my other friends would do so like that. And when I just take back mu arms, she would remark about how she thinks I hate her for having her as a bestfriend. When I talk to someone whom she doesn't like, she would try her best to get me away from them. She even dragged me by arms and away. She would ask me to not be friends with that person and not even look at her. I admit it frankly that she makes me uncomfortable. I want to avoid her but she'll always cling onto me. I tried talking to her several times buy she won't even listen. I just wish to avoid her.
*hugs* I don't know what to say. If you already acknowledged that the friendship is toxic, then you already are much better than many other people in a similar situation, which I think is a wonderful thing. But as for how to deal with it... Then I really don't know. You want to avoid her but she clings to you. You talk to her, but she won't even listen... I'm lost here. You could try being extremely blunt and say you want her out of your life or something, but I'm not sure if you want to cut ties completely or if you're okay with hurting her, so well... I dunno. Do your best? I hope you can solve this! >.<
Tell the teacher she’s harassing you. You did tell her to leave you alone and now she’s over stepping the boundaries. Idk how serious your school is, but the public schools where I am this would cause a huge storm. Honestly, I tend to overreact and I would go straight to screaming at her, but... yeah, just use everything you got this is nasty so fight nasty
Scream. No. Really. Scream in distress. Draw attention to the fact you're uncomfortable. The teacher most probably doesn't understand the extent of the situation. Tell her that the girl is harassing you and isn't actually your friend. Or better yet, scream loudly for her to stop. This might make you feel embarrassed or even anxious in the moment - however drawing others' attention to the fact you two are definitely not on good terms will help in the long run. Tell the teacher that she is touching you where you don't want to be touched. If that girl tries to drag you away from other people: scream. She is literally putting her hands on you and that is grounds to definitively separate her from you in a meaningful way. It gets attention, even if you get anxious when everyone starts paying attention to the situation- please remember that this so she gets away from you. Screaming is a non violent but disruptive way to draw immediate attention to a situation. It also stays with people's memories and makes them highlight that part of the day. She won't be able to get away with it if everyone is looking, and the teacher won't be able to deny you the right to sit far away from her.
The more you tried to evade your friend, the more your best friend will tried to cling on you. From your description, I felt as if your best friend have no friend other than you. If you didn't explain anything to your best friend, then your best friend might feel that you would be gone and it might scare your best friend enough to cling on you. I'm not personally there so what I'm writing was merely my speculation. My advice is. Go talk to your friend.
https://forum.novelupdates.com/posts/7153805/ she tried talking before and now its still occuring. https://forum.novelupdates.com/posts/7154133/ same forum page btw but I think what your saying is true, she probably only has Sleepy as a friend and doesn't want to feel alone, or is jealous of her friendships with others. Either way, now its stepping into a creepy zone.
You mean real life Yandere? This situation kind of remind me of my sister boyfriend and yeah, real life yandere is scary.
I think I understand what you're trying to say, and I agree that most of the time the best thing to do is try and talk it out with whomever you're having an issue because most people can come to an understanding and either fix or lessen an issue by talking heart to heart. But there are a couple things I am confused on. OP, you refer to this person in your post as your best friend. Do you truly consider this person as your best friend, are they just labeled that because they say they are, or is it because that's just how things have always been? If they REALLY see YOU as their best friend, then they should listen and respect your decision even if they don't like it when you set boundaries. Someone who either doesn't listen or doesn't care and oversteps your personal boundaries is someone who DOES NOT RESPECT YOU. I don't consider anyone who can't even give me basic respect as a friend, let alone a best friend. I think the best thing you can do is what you're already doing right now; you are taking some real time to think about how you feel and why you feel that way. Everything in life, especially complex things like human relationships, become easier when you've taken time to understand them better. I strongly recommend you see this video (if you haven't already) on human relationships. It's pretty short and really cute, but it's helped me a lot with all kinds of relationships and even my own self respect. I genuinely don't know you or your friend, but if they are having an overall negative affect on you and refuse to change, then sometimes you just have to tell them to their face, "I've asked you not to do X because it makes me feel uncomfortable/bad, but you keep doing it. I cannot be your friend." If the person's first reaction is, "Oh wow... I'm sorry I made you feel this way," then there might be hope for your relationship. But most people who ignore your boundaries at this point will either say they'll change to keep your friendship because it is beneficial to them, which is possible, but change is hard and unlikely. Or they will blow up and make it your fault by saying your selfish for not putting up with feeling bad for them to feel good. Again, I cannot stress enough how much that video helped me recognize some of the unhealthy relationships I had with others and myself (lots of self shame and blame that people used against me), so check it out . And this goes for men and women.
I've heard of a saying that a person is the average of the five people they spend the most time around. That's how much influence this person could have on the treatment that you think is normal, your outlook on life, and your opinion on other people in general.
I think this is past the point of a simple conversation about boundaries. It’s at the point we’re you need more help. Personally, I’d talk to my parents and have them help you move classes or in worst case move schools. Don’t put up with it. Also remember this is NOT your fault. You are NOT a bad person. It’s ok to want to be in a comfortable learning environment. Remember you shouldn’t light yourself on fire to keep someone else warm. It’s ok having an environment that doesn’t causes unneeded stress. I wish you luck
You friend is possessive she want your attention at all times and needs you so that she feels comfortable. she is like a dog it might be due to the lack of kindness and attention at home and you have indulged her when no one at home does. these types are very needy and if you don't speak out and create your own boundaries she will continue to cross them since she know you won't do anything. bring it to attention to the teacher tell her what is happening and if the teacher doesn't feel like remedying the situation threaten to bring this to the principal or talk to your school counselor before escalation. escalation is what most adults fear no one wants to be in the crosshairs of their boss. business/political language are the most feared in this world as the consequences of those who use it well can crush anything and anyone with just a few words.
1 of my friend rn is similar to that friend of yours, she's also my seatmate. Even bigger problem is the fact that I'm a social butterfly and have friends everywhere lol. She would get angry and sulky when i didn't hugged her first or didn't have the same level of enthusiasm like i do to my other friends, or when i started talking to other people, yadah yadah she easily gets jealous a lot lol. Would demand my attention all the time and would start to complain if my attention started to drift to somewhere else, she's very vocal about it. She also overthinks a lot, ask if I'm angry or mad at her cause she felt like i was ignoring her, yadah yadah, very clingy it pains me tho cuz she rlly got heavy hands.. my poor arms and would try to bring me everywhere she wanna go. But the difference between you and me is that this kind of behaviours just mildly affects me, in fact i find it amusing, but sometimes things also gets annoying like when she makes other people uncomfortable due to her attitude. Anyways the thing that i found is that she's actually easy to handle lol, I'm not a pushover when I don't like something I'm very expressive, raise my voice and act displease, or casually call out her attitude like "girl, Why are you so jealous?" AND LMAO she admitted that she got a dark heart or something and like she just feels mad whenever my attention's not on her, i replied with "You better learn how to control those girl, You know the world's too wide for you to be the focus of my attention, we just have many things to do and everytime my attentions not on you I'm not mad! I'm just busy" she isn't so bad from my eyes so i just lightly warned her about some things, anyways it was pretty funny i wasn't friends with her on social media so i didn't checked my dms from other people but damn there was a whole ass apology letter there, it wasn't a big deal to me, although her attitude was pretty annoying (she is bossy, sensitive, and possessive) when i spent sometime with her she's surprisingly sweet, although you just gotta bear the fact that you're the focus of her life now.. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i like the gifts, i like the effort she gives ok, it's pretty cute, she's pretty confused and a bit fast paced andd forceful but atleast she's trying. But that's from my experience, yours..*hugs* I agree to everyone above, i can just imagine how drainful this is, God i have the worst impression of this girl when we first met and i actively avoided her too but she just keeps clinging, anyways i was drained, i hope your situation goes well, i wish you luck and hope your friend give you some peace.
My first thought of reading this is that she's probably into you.. But after reading your previous thread, it feels like her inferiority complex is turning into a dependence.. she doesnt know how or she doesnt want to let a new 'friend' in her life. So.. first of all, you need to know that you are not responsible for her life. Second, if you do feel the need to help her. You can try to introduce her to your other friends. She might just forgot 'how' to let other people into her private social circle. Try to get her involved with more people than just 2 of you(and by this i dont mean you dumping her on your other friend. You need to be involved if you wanted your bff to actually like other people) Third, if you really cant deal with it anymore. talk to your parents, teacher, or even your bff's parent.