So it's a continuation of the I Experienced Love thread where i rant on how broken hearted i am. 3 days after i blocked her, a new account of hers suddenly message me, inviting me for a meal. I already said everything i wanter to say to her. I even stated my stance, that I don't want to get hurt anymore. SHE KNEW THAT I STILL FUCKING LOVE HER, SHE KNEW THAT IT BREAKS MY HEART EVERYTIME IM REMINDED THAT SHE ALREADY BELONG TO SOMEONE YET she still wants me to stay as her more than a friend but less than a boyfriend role. A very fucking painful role where im just floating around, I don't have any right to feel jealous, I don't have any assurance of being able to stay with her. She even said that she missed hanging out with me. I then said "You remember the day of your birthday, the time i hold your hands tightly for a long time? I did that because i knew that was the last time i can touch you after you confessed that your officially dating. I cant kiss nor touch you anymore." She then replied with "That's still possible " Like fuck, i know that's fucked up, that it's not the right thing. B-but im fuxking tempted...She keeps saying that the whole sex thing is just a joke...im fucking disgusted to myself for wanting it to be true, that it was just a whole joke and im just thinking too much...even thought it changes nothing. She's still someone's girlfriend... i think you guys can now somewhat understand why i stayed in that weird situation back then. P.s im not tempted by the idea of having sex but rather being with her. P.s2 you might find it weird that im conscious about her doing it with her boyfriend. That's the final line i wouldn't cross, if she belong to someone to that degree, i would rather die than cling to someone's else . P.s3 Please don't badmouth her and say that she's a b*tch. I want to think that she would only allow those because of the years we spent together even if it was a bit of a stretch.
run. just run as far and fast as you can. not even having read your first thread, and just reading this one, i can see a forest of red flags. she's obviously a *blank* because she has a boyfriend but wants you as an obedient on-call simp that she can use as a door mat toy. dont just burn the bridges with her, NUKE THEM. nothing good can come from being involved with her and if you let the little brain fool you into being her simp, if anything gets found out she'll probably throw you under the bus as fast as she can. depending on her boyfriend's attitude, it might even earn you an ass-kicking and a really bad rep.
Dude, have some self worth. You need to cut all ties and block her. She toxic. I’ll give you some joy for the future alright. Give it 3 to 6 months of no contact and you won’t believe how much better you will feel. The pain will never leave, but time dulls it. Always remember Bro. It’s not your fault. Focus on your goals, dreams or purpose. Whatever. Just move. Head to the gym and beat the shit out of the weights. If she comes around pull the “180” and “Gray Rock” her. The 180 is to do the opposite of what your doing. The opposite of happiness isn’t sadness or anger. It’s indifference. So do that. Be so indifferent that cake she is trying to eat will taste sour. Gray Rock is to become as emotionless as a rock. Do not use the pick me dance. Be strong and move on. The best Revenge is a well lived life. So don’t seek out closer. You won’t get it. Find closer, happiness or self worth within yourself. Take a big breath and face life with a chip on your shoulder and something to prove. Than prove your worth to the world. You got this Bro. We’re cheering you on. Good luck
You don't need to see her. Treat her like she doesn't exist. Post breakup is the time for yourself. To heal you and let you get used to your new routine. It only takes 6 months to break a habit, no matter how long it had been, just 6 months if you allow yourself and commit to the fact that it's going to be a new start for yourself. You don't deserve the pain, so let it go away with acceptance. There is nothing we can do for the past, it's gone, what's been done and said is already there and nothing can erase it, not her sweet talks. Don't be manipulated as you are not a weak and stupid person she can control, prove her how strong your will is. The best revenge is to live a life being happy without them. It shows how little impact they created in your life. Wishing them is nice and romantic but we don't live in novels or dramas and the most important here is you. You should be the center of your universe. Accept what has past and realize the mistakes and lessons you learned along the way. Acceptance is something you should allow yourself and closure is something only you can realize. Enough is enough and allow yourself to treat you right and give you the respect you need. Nothing matters, especially the words of a person who didn't care and treated you as a human worthy of respect. Always remember you have control of your mind, it's you who give power to her words because you wanted her to be special but put that to a stop and allow yourself release to all this emotions and allow yourself to move on with hopes. She's not special, she's just like every person in the world, don't put her on a pedestal. Don't allow a person who doesn't even posses basic human value to affect your mind. Thousand years of evolution gone and wasted, she seems like an otome game MC, a attention seeker but no matter what it's you who you should care for not people from the past. You are deserving of all the good in the world, to be treated right just like how you treated her. Only if you allow yourself to release all this grief and pay no mind to her. It's time to focus on yourself, love yourself a little more, give yourself the respect it deserve. If you're ready for company in the future, just tune in and be hopeful as you once we're because now you're a person with experience and as long as you project the same energy, it'll attract the same energy back to you. Don't ever allow an insignificant person live in your head rent free. Inflation is all time high right now you know.
Bro....no, she is a bitch. Take this from a girl that has guys friends and has seen all tok many times. She is stringing you along and enjoying every second of it. She likes the attention you give her and relishes in it. You don't do that to someone you consider a friend. Especially if it's someone you've known for as long as you say you have. There's no defending that in any way. Call it like it is.
While I barely know the story, I can understand what your coming from. Its hard to forget someone you love from the bottom of your heart. I know that since I have that kind of experience and its hard not to relate. But one thing you need to do is follow what others say and just ignore her. You can't just think that it would work out or it will change. No. It won't and it'll only hurt you more. You have your own standards and you'll just waste your life just chasing after a person that would make you regret a life worth of pain. So, its better take the short route rather than a painful long term suffering. I cause so many people pain just by thinking I would have a chance with a girl, only to regret it forever but seeing that you still have time, I want to at least help someone take the opposite route I took. Think about yourself and the choices that would escalate in the future. Would you rather take the short route and recover to become a better man? Or wasting your entire life, just chasing after someone that would hurt you? People gave you a better choice but I want you to follow what you want to do rather than letting us help you. We can give you a good advice but its your life and its your choice to pick. So you can see whether you made the right call or not and regret it in the future.
Is it really that bad? I thought it was a weird situation where there is no bad guy but only a bunch of adults having their own choices. She chose to break up with me so she's free to date whoever she wanted, i chose to cling to that little hope of getting back together by being pathetic. The other dude chose to date her. But on another note, we do kinda approaching the cheating category..i guess that was really bad...
Just make a decision, if you want to destroy your life and hurt those who care about you than stay with her, if not, drop her from your life.
Bro, look at it from the boyfriend's perspective. Would you be okay if your girlfriend had a 'friend' she did all that with? You wouldn't think twice about the relationship? You wouldn't feel jealous, betrayed, cheated on? You may be in pain right now but it's still no reason to cause pain for another person. Also, forget her. Go cold turkey. Block her number, her social media, everything for 6 months. Get over her completely before trying to be friends again before you do shit that you would regret. Nothing is worth you losing your conscience or peace over. NOTHING.
Bro look up the “Pick Me Dance”. She a cake eater. She wants to have her cake and eat it too. Let me explain something Bro. For a relationship that she is try to push on to you. Will Never Work. For a relationship like this to even work out for the short term. All parties must understand and agree to this relationship. Before hand. Let me ask you. Do you at anytime need to hide anything. That’s a dead giveaway. If you have to hide something. Than there must be a reason and it’s usually something shade reason.
You're still in denial stage, where you think your need to know what went wrong, and trying to take in the mistake and owe up the mistakes etc. Whether it's not that bad doesn't matter at all, Whether who did what or not doesn't matter, you broke up in the end. I mean what do you want? Have you ask yourself? I mean you can choose to be a Doormat and be at her becks and calls, do what makes you happy. But if it you need advice it is to Get self respect and move on. You're in denial still, you won't listen no matter what and that's normal, it's basic for majority of people. I mean it's still fresh so you'll eventually pass through the stages of grief by yourself, hard or easy way, whether you like it or not.
Bro, you want to know what you should be feeling. I’ll tell you what you should be thinking. You should feel LUCKY. You know why? Because you dodge a bullet the size of the moon. You saw how she acted. Now believe her. She has shown her true self. Just imagine if she was your girlfriend or worse. Your wife. Dude this lottery level lucky. Say a prayer and move on
if you expected people to call her that word from your ps 3, you probably are clear of what kind of person she is. I would see this as a red flag and steer clear. I don't want to be a 3rd party nor a spare tire no matter how much I like someone
That's also the reason why im reluctant in staying. But on another note maybe she simply wanted me as a friend and nothing more. Maybe im just the only one who's thinking too much... Ok that's too much of a stretch after she said it's still ok for the kiss and hug part lol. Im fucking desperate to even came up with that reason lolol
Staying platonic friends after a break up is something good - and even that takes time to really work. But the situation you describe? Yeah, I'm with the rest of the crew - stay away from that type of person. I know it'll break your heart but frankly - anything happening in regards to her will do that, sooner or later. Rip that band aid of fast and as painless as possible. And once your hormones settle down (in quite some time, gotta be realistic here, sorry) and you see her for what she is - just another human being. Then will come a time, I suppose, when you may question yourself for ever feeling for a person capable of that type of sh*t, but that last part is just an assumption of mine.
Bro, I’ll tell you straight. Your not the first man to fall into this type of mess and your probably won’t be the last. Unfortunately people in these situations tend to have two outcomes. The one we suggested. Which will I guarantee you. Will work out the best for you. Or the path your leaning towards that if I had to guess. The majority of people do. Dude, remember this. Your not a Psychologist. You can’t change her. You can’t save her. You don’t have a choice. The only thing you have control over is yourself. Bro not even her parents have the power to do anything if she is dead set on doing. Stop trying to come up with excuses for her. Other guys wait around hope against hope that they were wrong. That it’s a misunderstanding. I know she cares about me. Bro your not helping her. Your enabling her. You being there is making it worse. Bro, even if she threatens bodily harm. It’s not your job to be her white knight. You call the police because this is exactly what they do. Bro just STOP. Be the man you wish to be for her. For yourself. Do me favor Bro don’t drink and make sure you talk to people. Family, friends or a councilor. It’s not evil to take care of yourself. Good luck Bro