Novel ✪ Memory Corruption (R-18) (Book 1 and 2 Finished) (Book 3 on release now)

NEW CHAPTER POSTED ON 10/28/23!!!
Hi, I'm writing a story called "Memory Corruption"

Synopsis:
Her best friend turned out to be her worst enemy. The hero from her dreams has come back into her life after nine years, to save her, once again, or arrest her for a crime she doesn't know if she took part in.

Isabelle Arwen Ross is a 19 yo that got involved with the wrong kind of people and got herself caught up in a series of events that put her life in danger and might get her in jail for crimes she didn't committed (or at least doesn't remember committing them).

Ryan Alexander Desmond is a 26 yo FBI agent that spent more than two years by now trying to solve this case that plunged his life even deeper into darkness.

While trying to recover her memory, Belle will have to deal with the conflict of being in love for the first time and keeping herself safe, with Ryan's help.


Genre: Action, Drama, Fiction, Romance
Warning: Contains +18 and sensitive topics

Side Notes from the Author and Trivia from the characters/from the story

BOOK 1:
Chapter 1 > The spark that lit the candle (Jersey)
Chapter 2 > A little bit of loneliness, a little bit of disregard (Faint)
Chapter 3 > The murderer sitting next to you (Heathens)
Chapter 4 > Between the lines of fear and blame (How to save a life)
Chapter 5 > Dust off your highest hopes (Everything has changed)
Chapter 6 > Bet it all on black (I knew I couldn't trust you)
Chapter 7 > Taking sides (Decode)
Chapter 8 > The hate rise up (Wait and Bleed)
Chapter 9 > Ups and Downs (My Sacrifice)
Chapter 10 > When push comes to shove (boyfriend)
Chapter 11 > So close yet so far (Give Your Heart a Break)
Chapter 12 > Nothing is what it seems (Duality)
Chapter 13 > Turn the tides (Save Me)
Chapter 14 > The Warning Signs (Graveyard)
Chapter 15 > To anyone who might care (everything I wanted)
Chapter 16 > It'll be alright (Never Too Late)
Chapter 17 > Loving can hurt (Photograph)
Chapter 18 > Hanging on a wire (Suddenly I See)
Chapter 19 > Broken inside (Nobody's Home)
Chapter 20 > Dead words for closed ears (The Ponytail Parades)
Chapter 21 > Impaired (Unwell)
Chapter 22 > Not real (Losing Grip)
Chapter 23 > Time to Sink or Swim (Papercut)
Chapter 24 > Jumping through hoops (positions)
Chapter 25 > Feeling the tension (Every Time You Leave)
Chapter 26 > Broken Ties (In A Lose, Lose Situation)
Chapter 27 > Sickness and Pain (Southern Weather)
Chapter 28 > No turning around (Hero/Heroine)
Chapter 29 > Lighting up the dark (Memories)
Chapter 30 > Point a finger (Playing God)
Chapter 31 > Dig the grave (When The Sun Sleeps)
Chapter 32 > On the other side (Mirrors)
Chapter 33 > In the spotlight (Losing my Religion)
Chapter 34 > Truth or Dare (Beat it)
Chapter 35 > Rule the Roost (Penguins and Polar Bears)
Chapter 36 > Tunnel vision (Monsters)
Chapter 37 > Moving Slower (In a Win Win Situation)
Chapter 38 > Trapped in yearning (Possession)
Chapter 39 > Back off (Headstrong)
Chapter 40 > Perfect Imperfections (All of Me)
Chapter 41 > Hell-bound (Demons)
Chapter 42 > Too weak to give in, Too strong to lose (Best of You)
Chapter 43 > Dealing in Percents (Studying Politics)
Chapter 44 > Fall apart (Playing for Keeps)
Chapter 45 > Caught in the Undertow (Numb)
Chapter 46 > A breeding ground for hate (Miss You Love)
Chapter 47 > Holding on (Emergency)
Chapter 48 > Supernova (Space Bound)
Chapter 49 > Remember Every Second (Lose You Now)
Chapter 50 > Invincible (Could It Be Any Harder)


BOOK 2
Warning: Contains +18 and sensitive topics (sex, drugs, violence and suicide). *Contains explicit sex scenes, with detailed description.*

Chapter 1 > Another Mentality (no tears left to cry)
Chapter 2 > Keep breathing (Far Away)
Chapter 3 > Calm the Storms (Everything)
Chapter 4 > Sordid little insurrections (Before I Forget)
Chapter 5 > Guilty as charged (Search and Destroy)
Chapter 6 > Simmer down and pucker up (Do I Wanna Know?)
Chapter 7 > Trust (Conspiracy)
Chapter 8 > Without a trace (Every Breath You Take)
Chapter 9 > Pull down the shade (Crazy)
Chapter 10 > A man of three fears (Bad Liar)
Chapter 11 > Cross the line (Into you)
Chapter 12 > Hide and Seek (Give me love) R
Chapter 13 > Sea of blankets (Your Body Is a Wonderland) R
Chapter 14 > Such a Softer Sin (I caught fire) R
Chapter 15 > Jealousy (Mr. Brightside)
Chapter 16 > The darkest place (Away from the sun)
Chapter 17 > Disengage (Over my Head)
Chapter 18 > Getting Closer (Please Forgive Me)
Chapter 19 > Beyond Bliss (Love Me Harder) R
Chapter 20 > A way into the darkness (Already Dead)
Chapter 21 > Where the road crashed into the ocean (No, it isn't)
Chapter 22 > Time cannot erase (My Immortal)
Chapter 23 > It comes with a price (Cat and Mouse)
Chapter 24 > Settle down / Give it up (Kiss Me) R
Chapter 25 > Running in circles (Circles)
Chapter 26 > Settling the final score (That's what you get)
Chapter 27 > Nothing left to lose (With or Without You)
Chapter 28 > Picking up the pieces (Under Serious Attack)
Chapter 29 > Another wound to discover (Everything you want)
Chapter 30 > Bend the truth (Lying from you)
Chapter 31 > Ripple effect (Face Down)
Chapter 32 > Start out by starting over (Lovers and Liars)
Chapter 33 > After the storm (Call it what you want)
Chapter 34 > Pulling on the reins (Start Again)
Chapter 35 > Back to the ground again (Halo)
Chapter 36 > A Higher Law (One)
Chapter 37 > Taste the bright lights (Welcome to the Jungle)
Chapter 38 > Twisted Thoughts (Black)
Chapter 39 > Hypocrisy (Over My Head)
Chapter 40 > A world of fools (How Deep Is Your Love)
Chapter 41 > If shame had a face (Sick Cycle Carousel)
Chapter 42 > From deep inside (Time After Time)
Chapter 43 > Make it sunny (Milk and Toast and Honey)
Chapter 44 > The sweetest dream (I Don't Want to Miss a Thing) R
Chapter 45 > Always have and never hold (Look after you)
Chapter 46 > Thinking too much (Ride)
Chapter 47 > Make it last, Take it slow (God is a Woman) R
Chapter 48 > Perfect Match (Fire meets Gasoline) R
Chapter 49 > Turning Point (Good Riddance)
Chapter 50 > Looking down the barrel (Mardy Bum)
Chapter 51 > Bury the castle (Brick by Boring Brick)
Chapter 52 > A breakable thread (My Happy Ending)
Chapter 53 > Hero (High Hopes)
Chapter 54 > Pulling apart and coming together (Never say Never)
Chapter 55 > An old enemy (Come as you are)
Chapter 56 > Stirring the truth and the lies (Going Under)
Chapter 57 > Never to touch and never to keep (Let her go)
Chapter 58 > A Violent Farewell (Learn to be still)
Chapter 59 > The rings of past fatalities (Vermilion)
Chapter 60 > Shaking the wreckage (It was fear of myself that made me odd)
Epilogue (The march of Mephisto)

BOOK 3:
Warning: Contains +18 and sensitive topics (sex, drugs, violence, rape, torture and murder). *Contains explicit sex and violence scenes, with detailed description.* *won't contain explicit descriptions of rape, just for the record*

Chapter 1 > Living at the mercy of the pain and the fear (Waiting for the end)
Chapter 2 > Where hate don't need a reason > (Nightmare) !
Chapter 3 > Something to hold onto (Be like that) !
Chapter 4 > Woken up the demon (Down with the sickness)
Chapter 5 > Pride and faith (Closer to the edge) !
Chapter 6 > You don't really know what you got 'til it's gone (Where'd you go)
Chapter 7 > The sex, the purge, the pain, the book (The Terrible Secret)
Chapter 8 > Break the chains (Whatever it takes)
Chapter 9 > Secrets (Secrets)
Chapter 10 > Looking for friends at high tide (I Am Mine)
Chapter 11 > Bury the hatchet or bury a friend (bury a friend)
Chapter 12 > A master plan (Not Now)
Chapter 13 > A whisper to a riot (Walk)
Chapter 14 > Between the thorns and the roses (Who Do You Trust?)
Chapter 15 > Face the facts (Paint it, black )
Chapter 16 > Ricochet (Titanium)
Chapter 17 > Play the role (Bad guy)
Chapter 18 > A new dawn (Feeling Good)
Chapter 19 > Take what comes (Walking the wire)
Chapter 20 > Carried Away (Pressure)
Chapter 21 > Prices and Vices (Anti-Hero)
Chapter 22 > The sharpest knife (This Is Where I Came In)
Chapter 23 > The path to Heaven runs through miles of clouded hell (It's Time)
Chapter 24 > Bent and broken (Not gonna die)
Chapter 25 > The powers at play (Enemy) NEW
Chapter 26 > Breathe again (Broken)

RYAN'S POV (Spin-off/Gaiden)
*I must warn that this is purely drama and smut -.- don't judge me, it's being pretty fun to write*

Prologue (Hurt -Johnny Cash)
Chapter 1 > Fatally flawed (Sexed up - Robbin Williams) R
Interlude (How Can You Mend a Broken Heart - Bee Gees)
Chapter 2 > The wound heals, but the scar remains (Every Rose Has Its Thorn - Poison)
Chapter 3 > Looking for a little romance (The Lady in Red -Chris De Burgh)
Chapter 4 > Working double time (You shook me all night long - ACDC) R
Chapter 5 > No stop signs (Highway to Hell - ACDC) R
Chapter 6 > Masquerading as a man with a reason (Carry on Wayward Son -Kansas)

Chapter 12 > The match you strike to incinerate (Helena - My Chemical Romance) !
Interlude (In the end - Linkin Park)

Chapter ? > A girl can do what she wants to do (Bad Reputation - Joan Jett & the Blackhearts)
Chapter ? > Not that different at all (You'll Be In My Heart - Phil Collins)

Chapter ? > The Damaged One (The blister Exists - Slipknot)
Chapter ? > The Wall (Another Brick on the Wall - Pink Floyd)

Chapter ? > A camouflage for what resembles rage (Snuff - Slipknot)

Chapter ? > The World Turns Cold (My Guardian Angel - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus)
Chapter ? > Nothing left to lose (With or Without you -U2)
Chapter ? > Made to Break (Perfectly Wrong - Shawn Mendes)

 

Chapter 1


-Isabelle, you need to wake up! - She blinked as ashes got into her eyes and made it burn and itch.

She hurriedly tried to rub it to clean it, but her sight was blurred by some red sticky liquid she herself brought to her face. She looked down at her hand, blinking repeatedly and saw the blood. She gasped and tried to wipe it off her fingers in her shirt, which was torn from her navel to the side of her body.

Belle looked around, confused, and realized her leg was stuck under a heavy pile of debris. It wasn't hurting too much, but as she tried to pull it, she felt like she would rip her foot off.

She coughed, desperately as she realized the whole house was aflame. The fire hadn’t invaded the room yet, but the smell of burned hair, ashes and burning wood flooded her nostrils. She desperately tried to lift part of the debris that was pinning her to the ground, but she didn't have the strength.

-Help! -She tried to scream, but breathed in a great amount of smoke and put her hand up to cover her nose and mouth, coughing. -Help…

Dying from asphyxiation would be less painful than burning alive, she thought to herself, taking the hand out of her face, but instinctively putting it back as her lungs started to burn.

Suddenly, someone kicked the window, shattering the glass. She looked up, confused. Maybe she was dreaming, since it wasn't a fireman. It was a handsome young man. He was wearing an army’s uniform, with camouflage patterns and heavy boots. He stomped to her side, and she noticed he was completely soaked with water and sweat. She couldn't see his face as it was half covered by his shirt, tied around his face, and his broad chest was covered by a white almost transparent sleeveless shirt. Belle grimaced as she felt his hand press under her eyes and force her to open her mouth so he could check inside it.

-Can you hear me? -He asked, taking a soaked napkin from his pocket, and putting it to her mouth and nose too. -Nod if you can't talk.

She nodded.

-Hold this. Make sure you breathe through it, not under it. -He instructed, mimicking with his own hands.

She nodded again. It was easier to breathe, but her lungs were burning a lot from the effort.

-I'm gonna lift it off from you, do you think you can pull your leg out on your own? -He asked, urgently.

She nodded and he quickly examined the debris, taking one bigger raft from the top of the pile with great difficulty and checking if there was any risk of something collapsing before lifting it off her leg.

She crawled backwards, using her elbows, still trying to keep the napkin pressed on her face. He lowered the heavy burden carefully, to avoid another cave-in.

-Here. -He took her face roughly and tied the napkin around her head and neck, improvising a mask. It was so tight it hurt, but she didn't complain. He bent down and checked her leg, lifting the hem carefully. -We're leaving through the window. Hold on to me. Don't let go, it's high, if you fall you're gonna get very hurt. Did you understand what I told you?

She nodded. He held her and put her arms around his neck, lifting her up and instructing her to wrap her legs around him. “Like a baby monkey”, he explained, earning a shy smile in response. He opened the window, making sure it wouldn't fall on their heads as they went through.

-I got the girl! -He shouted, then started climbing down.

She held on to him, clumsily, trying not to get in the way of his strong arms as he supported both his and her weight on the way down. Her face was buried in his neck, she could feel the faint smell of his perfume through the wet napkin, but he didn't seem to care. She wondered how old he was, as he didn't look like he was more than eighteen.

She held more tightly to his neck as he jumped to the ground and held her in his arms, offering her to a fireman nearby for him to examine her.

-I think her ankle might be broken, sir, she was buried by debris. Did you manage to get the mother out?

The fireman shook his head, mournfully.

-There was a backdraft when a door collapsed. We can't get in now, it's too dangerous. We're trying to find another way to get to the bedroom, but she stopped screaming too long ago. -He shook his head again. He looked at the girl with a sad look. - She's lucky she's alive, I don't think someone would survive a fire that bad. I'm inclined to believe it wasn't an accident.

The boy nodded, looking at her with pitiful eyes.

Now that he took the shirt off his face, using it to wipe the ashes, she could tell his features could belong to a model. She blushed when his eyes turned back into her direction and he gave her a thin smile.

-You did very well, my boy. Good thing you heard her and acted fast. It wasn't even your duty. -A fat fireman came to compliment him, offering his hand.

The boy wiped his hand on his pants before shaking it and glanced at her again.

-It was nothing, sir. My duty is to protect every citizen of this country. You'd do the same, I was just faster, sir. -He nodded. -I really have to go, I'll probably get in big trouble for staying behind during the training…

He turned to her with a sympathetic smile.

-My name is Ryan. What's your name? -He crouched in front of her.

-Isabelle… - She coughed and her voice came out hoarse and strangled, leaving only the “Belle” really audible.

-Well, Belle, take care of yourself, ok? I'm sorry for your loss, but you'll grow up and turn into a beautiful strong woman. -He held his hand out for her to shake it. -Don't let this take you down, ok?

She just nodded embarrassed and puzzled by his words. She held his hand, but didn't shake it. He looked surprised when she stretched her small fingers and intertwined them in his. He looked at their hands for a few seconds, then smiled empathetically and untangled his fingers from hers. She watched him as he walked away, smiling at him as he looked back at her from a distance, starting to run as he turned away from her again.

-Belle! -She looked around, to check who had been calling for her. -Isabelle, wake up!

She opened her eyes, confused, turning her head over her arms.

Chloe’s fairy like face was so close, they could kiss. Belle clicked her tongue and pulled her friend by the forehead.

-Get out, you freak. -She moaned, lifting her head and checking her surroundings. The classroom was almost empty.

She blushed and rubbed her eyes with her long sleeves.

-Haven't you slept at night again? -The girl asked, sitting on the desk. She was showing a scandalous amount of legs. -Aren't you taking the pills Daniel got you? He said it used to help you before...

-No, it wasn't helping...I had nightmares. Cover it up, you're gonna get suspended again. -Belle blushed, pulling her skirt down.

-The guys like it. And he is gonna be here again today…I saw his car in the parking lot. - She chanted, slapping Belle's hand away from her skirt. -I don't care if they suspend me, I'm gonna know exactly the same by the end of the year. You're lucky you're so smart, the teachers don't even mind it when you sleep anymore, for they know you'll get good grades. Still, you should do something about it, I think it's the fifth...

-Do you think he'll come to our class again? -Belle involuntarily brushed her hair down with her fingers. -Is it because of the fire, again?

-Terrorist attack, have more respect for the assholes that exploded in it. -Chloe corrected her.

-Chloe! - She hushed her. -Are you crazy? Don't talk like that! What if someone hears you?

-You and I know what kind of people all of them were. They were rapists and abusers, nothing more than that. They shouldn't get a memorial, they should get bananas, way up their asses.

Belle opened her mouth to reprimand her, but paused and took her things.

-Let's eat something, I think I'm gonna stay till late today. -She walked toward the door, with Chloe on her heels.

-To be interrogated by the hot detective? -Chloe joked as they left the room. -Do you think he will inspect you with his big hands? Like in the biblical way? He seems to be very interested in “interrogating” you in a dark room, if you know what I mean...

Belle blushed looking down, then looked up and her face got very pale. She froze and stood there with her eyes open wide.

-What's with that face? -Chloe looked at her and kept walking, tumbling against someone. -Hey, you moron, look where you're…

She shut up as dark eyes looked down on her.

-Miss Darling! -The principal scolded her, taken aback. -Mind your manners! And unroll that skirt immediately, what are you thinking this place is?

The detective didn't spend much time staring at her, taking a step back to avoid any more contact with her body and looking directly into Belle’s eyes. She thought he signaled some kind of recognition the first time he saw her, but now she wasn't so sure. If he did recognize her, it didn't make any difference to him.

-Miss Ross… - The principal turned in Belle’s direction and she flinched. She wanted to dig a hole and disappear inside it. Her head was spinning with indecision: should she avoid his gaze or should she stare back to at least check for any sign that he heard the foul things Chloe has been saying out loud?

-Miss Ross! -The principal snapped his fingers for her to look into his eyes.

-Yes, sir. -She answered, blushing.

-Are you too occupied?

-No sir, we were heading to the cafeteria… But I can go there later, what do you need, sir? -She said, ignoring Chloe's outraged grimace.

-I'm actually very hungry. -Chloe protested.

-Then you may go, Miss Darling. And unroll that skirt right now, or I'll get you suspended! -The principal made a gesture, dismissing her.

Chloe looked at Belle, signaling her to say she was hungry too, but she blatantly ignored it. The girl gave up and went away, unrolling her skirt to get it back to its original length.

-I'm sorry, they are difficult sometimes. It's their last year, they think they are adults already. -The principal explained, darting his gaze from the girl walking away to the stern looking man beside him. -Isabelle here, Miss Ross, she's a bit older, and more mature too. I think she can help you.

Belle's eyes flew toward the detective and she blushed again. Help him with what?

-I'm sure she can. -The detective nodded and looked into her eyes. His gaze raptured her and she couldn't look away. It was as if he could read her mind, as if he was inspecting every thought and every idea inside her head. She trembled.

-I… -She mumbled. -How can I help?

The principal sighed and walked away.

-I'll leave him in your capable hands. -He muttered, apparently glad to get rid of him. -Show him the football camp, the gym, the locker rooms, and training grounds. In fact, let him check anywhere he wants. I don't think there's a reason for this investigation to go on anyway, it was just a very sad accident…

He went away still muttering to himself.

Belle stood there, still shaking slightly under the gaze of the investigator.

-So? -He cleared his throat. -Lead the way.

She was confused.

-Hm… My name is Isa…

-Isabelle Arwen Ross, nineteen years old, first of your class, leader of the orientation team, student leader… I'm here to check the school, not to get your curriculum. -He rolled his eyes impatiently. -Move, I don't have time to waste.

-Ok… I'm sorry, Mister Ryan. -She answered, looking down and leading the way toward the football camp.

-What did you just call me? -He said, putting his arm in front of her to block her way.

-Mister Ryan… I'm sorry, I don't know your surname, we weren't properly introduced.

-Don't call me by my first name, I'm not your friend. -He frowned. The sight scared her, he looked angry or offended. -For you it's Desmond. Inspector Desmond if you want to be polite.

She blushed and nodded.

-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you, Mister Desmond.

-No mister. Either you call me detective or inspector. Don't call me mister. -He glared at her. -Go on, lead the way.

She wondered what she did to get him so angry. Maybe it was Chloe’s stupid jokes. He must have heard it, it was so loud.

-Belle! -She turned her head and saw Daniel's red face as he ran toward her. -There you are… Chloe said you had nightmares tonight, are you ok?

-Daniel, we can talk later, I have to show the school grounds for detective Desmond… -She signaled him to shut up, knowing he was about to offer her his mother's pills.

-Oh… -He looked at the inspector with a disgusted face. -Why do you have to do this?

-I don't know, the principal asked me to… So… -She didn't know how to dismiss him.

-Don't you have any classes to attend? - Desmond asked him, looking him up and down. He didn't seem to like Daniel either.

-I do, but what are you planning to do about it, cop? Arrest me?

-Daniel! -Belle blushed and shoved him away. -Shut up! I'm sorry, he didn't mean it…

-I can get you arrested for obstruction of justice, actually… -Desmond smirked. -Get lost, boy, you don't wanna get me started.

Daniel gazed into his eyes, then looked away.

-Call me if you feel unsafe. -Daniel told her in a lower tone, but she knew it was impossible for the detective not to hear it. -I don't like that guy… Chloe said he didn't take his eyes off of you last week. Be careful, don't be alone with him.

She looked away and nodded. Daniel went away. As she guided him through the corridors, a lot of students waved and smiled at her, glancing at the detective with curious faces.

She realized he glanced at her face with knit brows from time to time, as if something has been bothering him profoundly. Then, he suddenly started to make random questions about her or about the school.

-Are you popular? -Desmond asked her as they walked out of the lockers, heading for the gym.

-Not really, I'm not a cheerleader or something.

-In your file it said you were selected for cheerleading… -He tilted his head.

-I got preselected because the girls thought I would be a good… That I had a nice…-She blushed, not wanting to sound arrogant. - Face... And body. But I'm too clumsy, I'm not good at sports… I don't have rhythm too. So I skipped the tryouts and gave up. I didn't want it anyway, the guys get weird once you're in.

-You don't like the attention? -He seemed surprised.

-Not really… I try to keep my head down, it's not worth it to get people judging or envying you for things you don't need to show them… -She muttered. -It's enough to have people criticizing me for taking good grades, for example.

-Teenagers are stupid. -He shook his head, opening a door and peering inside it, only to find it was a janitor’s closet. -But if you have a talent, you should work on it, so you don't lose it. Fill your time with useful things, get better friends, those things…

-I don't really have any outstanding skills… -She was getting nervous as the conversation was taking turns that didn't make any sense to her. -I'm actually kind of average... Maybe even a bit disappointing.

-Or so you want people to think…-He lifted one eyebrow. -Anyway... You can sing very well, right? Why aren't you in the school band?

She looked up, startled. This information wasn't in her file. She never did anything noticeable for the school, like a presentation or getting into some band for her singing to be reported in her file.

 

Chapter 2


-How did you…

-What is this place? -He cut her off, pointing toward a maroon door to the side of the burned down gym. She didn't realize she was walking in this direction, but her foot was already over the first step of the iron stairs that would lead them to the almost hidden door.

-To be honest, I don't know. -She looked around, confused. -I'm sorry, I was nervous by your questions, I got distracted.

He grunted and passed by her, climbing the steps in three strides. He got to the door and fidgeted with the padlock.

-Maybe the principal will have the key… I can run there and ask him if you… -She turned and looked around, as she saw him taking something out of his pocket and kneeling to get a better view of the lock. -Are you breaking in?

She opened her eyes wide, getting closer.

-Please, don't do it. Are you lockpicking it? -She didn't know what to do. -Please, stop! Oh my God, why are you doing it? What if someone sees you, how are we gonna explain it?

-Shut up. -He looked up and snorted. -I have a warrant. I can break in if I want to, I just don't wanna ruin the padlock.

He got up and opened the door, making a weird gesture as if proud of his work. She took a step back.

-Ladies first.

-I'm not getting in, I don't know what's inside, I don't even know if I'm allowed to be here. -She looked into his eyes and bit her lower lip. -Look, I don't want to get in trouble, we should go see another place.

He grabbed her by the arm and shoved her inside. She staggered and tried to fight against his strength, to no avail.

-What is this place, Isabelle? -He looked around.

It looked like a maintenance corridor, with iron stairs that led above the gym, behind its walls.

-Do you think those stairs are still safe? Maybe the fire has compromised the structure. -She tried to stay as close as possible to the door, but the place was very narrow and as she took a step toward the door, her back bumped on his body.

He tested the stairs, putting some weight before going up. She followed him, feeling uneasy.

-Explosion. -He corrected. -There was an explosion, the fire wasn't even that big. You should know, you got caught in it, didn't you? I heard you passed out by the door.

She nodded, looking at him, confused. Was she being investigated? How did he know so much about her?

-I've been trying to understand how they got to detonate it with so much precision, I mean, people keep talking it was exactly by the time the football team was popping the champagnes, did you know it? -He pointed down and she could see the destroyed benches where the football team was blown up last month. -They were here, watching it, waiting for the right time.

She shivered. The image was still very clear in her mind, even though everything else was all a blur.

-What were you doing? -He asked her. -Before the explosion, where were you?

-Hm... Getting dressed? Getting to the gym? I just came in exactly by the time the explosion happened. I was lucky they didn't stomp me to death.

-Yeah, so I heard. -He examined her face. -But you forgot what you were doing before you got in, right?

-I have a problem… With my memory. -She crossed her arms and looked away. -I have panic attacks and sometimes I'll forget things that are… Traumatic… I can't control it, I'm sorry.

-Still, you remember my name.

She flinched. So he remembered her.

-You saved my life. It's hard to forget it. -She explained.

-You lost both your parents in a criminal fire, I think if that's not traumatic, I don't know what is. -He shook his head and glared at her.

She didn't answer, because she didn't know what to say.

-I think your memory loss is very convenient.

She was stunned by his lack of empathy. He couldn't be the same guy that saved her that night, he was now a block of ice.

-How did you know about this place anyway? -He inquired.

-I didn't, I told you, I just walked randomly without thinking. I didn't even know there was a door here. -She said, honestly.

-Don't lie to me. Who brought you to this place before and when? -His eyes pierced through her soul.

-I already told you, I've never been here, I didn't know this place existed. -She looked into his eyes, trying to make him see she was telling the truth. -I didn't have anything with that explosion, I swear.

He kept staring until she felt uncomfortable, and she looked around, feeling trapped. Then her eyes got caught in something hanging from the ceiling.

-Do you really think the person who did this came here that night? -She asked him.

-I'm almost sure now. I'll have a team come and try to find some digitals, maybe there's still some under the ashes. -He looked down, trying to identify some footprints beside theirs.

-Maybe you won't need to. -She pointed to the camera hanging from the ceiling. It was half concealed by a joist, but it would provide a full image of anyone that entered through the door.

He looked up and smiled, following the direction she was pointing.

-Fuck, so you are really a clever motherfucker, aren't you? -He praised her, with a laugh.

She sulked at his foul language, but didn't complain.

-Where do you think the images are stored? -She looked around, trying to follow the wires.

-None of your business. -He took some pictures with his phone and started texting, with a broad smile on his face.

-Take me to the next mysterious place, Isabelle. I might start liking you a bit. -He winked at her, and her heart skipped a beat. Why do you have to be so sexy, mister icy? She asked herself and turned her back to him.

They walked through the school grounds, stopping by every place he thought would be worth investigating. When they passed by the gym again, she saw there were a bunch of cops running around, wearing gloves and masks.

-So, tell me. Do you know many students that are good at chemistry and physics? Someone that's outstanding?

She wondered if it was a tricky question.

-I'm pretty good at it. I'm good at most school subjects. -She added.

-Someone better than you. -He looked into her eyes and stopped walking.

She turned to him and creased her eyebrows.

-There must be a lot of students that are better than me at a lot of things. -She shrugged. -Why?

His eyes narrowed at her modesty.

-Someone in your inner circle. -He insisted.

-Are you talking about Daniel? -She creased her eyebrows, not understanding where he was trying to lead her.

-Is he better than you?

-In chemistry, yes. - She nodded. -Certainly. He plans to pursue a career in the area. Now are you taking curriculums?

-So, he's very good? Like good enough to make drugs or explosives?

She squinted and shook her head.

-What are you talking about? He had nothing to do with that, too! -She was outraged by his accusations.

-Look… -He put an arm on her shoulder and led her to the parking lot, where no one could hear them. She took a deep breath as his perfume hit her nose. -I'm pretty good at reading people. That's what I do for a living and I'm astoundingly good at it.

She listened to his words and bit her lower lip, afraid that he might've noticed her interest in him.

-I like you. -He said it without preambles. She blushed. -I thought you'd be a totally different person, but now that I met you, from what I see now, I think I'm starting to understand how you got into this shit. I mean, you're kind of lovely, I sympathize with you, and if I do, most people must do too…

Belle looked down and felt her face burn violently. She was used to having the boys flirting with her now and then, but they were always very direct and almost rude. This was different, she had a feeling that he was trying to manipulate her somehow while flattering her. He put a finger under her chin and forced her to look up into his eyes.

-What I mean to say is this: You have a future. You have perfect grades, you're pretty and you have social skills… A bit too shy, and more naive than expected for your looks, but people like you can get what they want without having to work their asses. -He shrugged. -Don't throw it away because of people you might never see again in your life.

She squinted her eyes. At first, she thought he was flirting with her. Then she thought he would make an indecent proposal. But now she realized that she didn't understand anything.

-I can get you protection if you decide to talk. -He said, nonchalantly. -He would never know it was you, and I can get you free of almost any criminal charge, too… Of course, that depends on how much you got involved in his shit, but I'm willing to get out of my way for you if you turn him in to me. If you’ve done something you regret, you only have to call me, and tell me what you “don't remember”.

He rolled his eyes at the mention of her memory loss and handed out a card.

-Call me. Believe me, it's gonna be worse if you wait till we get you. And I will get you, you can't hide from me.

She looked down at the card, it was handwritten and only had his number, not his name.

-Is it some kind of joke? -She frowned deeply.

-What do you mean? -He frowned back.

-Oh, I don't know, maybe it's something that cops do, try to scare the girl, give her your number and expect her to call in fright… Maybe you think I'm gonna call you in the middle of the night and ask you to come over or something. -She shoved the card to his chest. -I'm not that kind of girl, and I'm not flirting with you, I'm just a nice person.

He took her hand off his chest and put the card back in her palm.

-Take the damn number. -He glared at her. -I'm not here for this. You'll regret not telling us what you know. If you don't feel like calling me, you can call 911, I don't care. But tell me what you know before I find it out.

He snorted and took a step back.

-You have a talent for getting into trouble, don't you? I heard your boyfriend is some kind of drug dealer too. -He put his hand to his hip and rubbed his forehead. -Was he the one who taught you not to trust cops?

She was taken aback. She didn't know William’s condition was that obvious. He was on drugs for years, and she was trying to help him get clean. Everyone thought they were together and she didn't mind correcting it, as it kept the guys away. No one wanted to mess up with the basketball star’s girlfriend.

-I… How… Please, don't tell anyone about Bill… He's a good guy, he got into bad company, but he's trying hard to get clean before he goes to college. -She stuttered and moistened her lips with her tongue, then bit her lower lip.

-Who the fuck is Bill? -He frowned deeply, tilting his head.

-Who were you talking about?

He stared at her, with a puzzled face. Since none of them was willing to provide any explanation, he took some steps back and sighed.

-Call me if you decide to talk. Don't call me in the middle of the night, anyway. I won't come over. -He mocked her, eyeing her from head to toes. -I'm into women, not little girls.

He turned away and she watched him as he disappeared inside his car. Her eyes watered because of the stiff rejection, but she held the tears away. He never looked back.

 

Chapter 3


-I'm telling you, the guy is nothing but a weirdo. -Daniel laughed as they sat at the cafe, with Chloe by his left and Belle by his right. Bill was laying on the bench, playing with a strand of Belle's hair. Trevor was sitting on a chair a bit far from the table, with his legs over the bench.

-Did he just give you his number, out of the blue? -Bill laughed. -Damn, imagine being so cocky you walk around with your number written on a card! Here's my card, lady, call me when you wanna fuck!

-Totally weirdo. -Daniel took a sip on his coffee and laughed.

-I think he's very sexy. If you don't want the card, just give it to me… I might send him some pictures… -Chloe gave her a naughty smile. -He’ll have a lot of things to investigate...

-Chloe, don't you ever feel ashamed of saying those kinds of things? I think he heard you this morning… -Belle blushed and covered her face. -God, why do you even say those things?

-You shouldn't worry. He's totally into you. -Chloe was nibbling on a licorice and her eyes were far away, fantasizing. -Fuck, I wish he would eat me with the eyes the way he did to you…

-Then he would go full pedophile. -Daniel shook his head. -Which he already is, since there's no way he could know Belle is not underaged.

-He knows...He read my file.

All eyes turned in her direction.

-Why? -Daniel looked annoyed and confused.

-I don't know… Maybe I'm a suspect. Do you think he knows about the party? I thought about showing him the sex cabin, but I didn't want to get near it… -She shivered. -Besides, it would be providing proof against myself, right?

They all just stared at her.

-Why did he read your file? Why didn't you ask him why? -Daniel pressed.

-I don't know, it didn't seem like a big deal, he knew about you being good at chemistry, for example.

-Did he, now? Why did you even talk about me? -He looked puzzled.

-I don't know. -She shrugged, not wanting to say in front of others that he was suspecting of Daniel.

-Be careful with that guy, Belle. -Bill sat up. -He seems to be obsessive about you. Just throw his number away and avoid him.

She nodded and drank her cappuccino.

-Are you coming over tonight? -He looked at her with pleading eyes.

-Sure. We can spend the weekend together. -She smiled.

She knew he’d had a relapse this week and that he would probably miss a lot of classes in the next two or three weeks trying to get clean again. Chloe and Trevor shared glances, implying something. Daniel knew the truth and just looked away. He thought Belle shouldn't even try to help Bill anymore. His parents didn't seem to care, as they were always traveling and never even noticed their son was on heroin. It's been three years already and the guy always relapsed.

-So, how are we gonna get rid of mister muscles… -Trevor asked them, playing with his lighter.

-We won't. -Daniel shrugged. -He’ll keep coming over and we'll keep ignoring him like we do every time he shows his ugly face at the school grounds. He'll get sick of chasing Belle and go away. There's nothing to investigate there, I don't know what they are still trying to find out.

-Well, they might find something now, if there's something to find… -Belle shrugged.

-What do you mean? -Trevor asked, looking at her intently.

-We found a camera in a hidden room to the side of the gym. He believes the detonation occurred by someone's remote command from there. -She explained. -Now they just have to analyze the images and get whoever did it.

They all stared at her. No one moved. Trevor’s jaw dropped. Chloe's eyes flew from Belle to Daniel. Daniel shrugged.

-I don't really think they'll find anything. -He smiled. -It wasn't a terrorist attack, it was just an accident. The assholes had a bunch of fireworks hidden under the bleachers, they sat there with a bunch of alcohol and lit a fire. Kaboom, end of story.

Belle flinched at his cold attitude toward the death of eleven colleagues. But she knew he was right, they basically committed collective suicide, hiding that amount of explosive material inside the gym. They could have caused the death of hundreds of students, it was through pure luck that the explosion happened right before the prom took place.

-I need to go, I need to do that chemistry homework for next week. Do you want a ride, Trevor?

-Sure. Bye, losers. -He kissed Chloe's and Belle's cheeks and got out.

Daniel kissed Belle's forehead and patted Chloe's head, waving at Bill's direction.

-Behave yourselves, you two. If you don’t take good care of her tonight, Bill, God knows I’ll kill you. -He chuckled and winked at Belle. -Do you want a ride too, Chloe?

-Thought you'd never ask! -She jumped up and kissed Belle's cheek and almost kissed Bill's mouth. -Bye, Bibell, I love you both!

Belle flushed and watched as her crazy friend took glances from all the men in all the tables, as her skirt showed the tip of her ass. She shook her head.

-Why do you even hang with her? - Bill shook his head too.

-I don't, she follows me around. -She laughed. -No, really, she's a good girl, she just needs someone near to remind her of it.

-And you're the saint Belle, that saves everyone. -He nodded. -Really, you should get rid of us.

She looked at him, with pitiful eyes.

-I'll never want to get rid of you, Bill, you're my friend, we'll get over it together, ok? -She smiled, putting her hand on his cheek. -You too are a good guy, you just took the wrong way once and now you're trying to find the right path.

-You are my guiding star… -He smiled, closing his eyes. -I love you, Belle… I hope someday I'll be able to pay back everything you've done for me.

-Get clean. That will be the most amazing thing you can do for me. -She smiled and hugged him.

That night they talked and laughed for hours, but then Belle’s phone rang. It was Chloe. She checked the time, 2 a.m. She sounded drunk, and was crying. Belle wasn't sure if she could leave Bill alone. He was shivering and sweating but he told her he would be fine, so she went to meet Chloe, at the school. She wondered what she was doing there at dawn on a Saturday.

She woke up in a hospital room. Her head hurt. A lot.

She looked around and saw Desmond’s dark eyes fixed on hers. She felt a chill run down her spine. His look told her that she was in great trouble.

-What happened? -She asked him, checking the drip connected to her arm. She pulled the blanket to cover the arm that didn't have a drip.

-You passed out in the middle of the street. You almost got run over while lying there. -He frowned. -But you called me before all that happened.

The last words made her frown too.

-Why did I call you? -She asked him, puzzled.

-I wish I knew. You called me and said “Ryan, please, help”. And hung up. - He shook his head in disbelief. -You sounded very drunk too. I asked for an analysis of your blood, since they didn't identify alcohol in your breath. Are you on drugs?

-No, I don't do drugs, never did, never will. How did you find me? -She blushed and tried to avoid the subject.

-I didn't! I went to your place but it was empty, so I warned the precinct and some colleagues to let me know if they found you. And here we are! - He lifted his hands in her direction. -At least now I know who was Bill.

-What do you mean? Did Bill find you? -She asked him, puzzled. -No, he wouldn't leave his place… Did you go after him? How is he?

He looked at her, squinting his eyes, with a somber face. Then his eyebrows went up.

-You really don't know.

-What? What don't I know? -She tried to sit up, but her head was throbbing.

-Nothing. We can talk about that later. -He looked away and leaned forward, resting his forehead on his hand, leaning his elbows on his knees. It was a beautiful sight, like a sculpture of a Greek God thinking. -What do you remember about this night, Belle?

She looked up as she heard him saying her nickname. He didn't notice.

-I was with Bill, at his place… -She tried to remember the order of events. -I got a call, it was Chloe, she asked me to meet her at the school. She was crying a lot.

-No, wait, why were you alone at his place? -He was puzzled.

-I wasn't alone, I was with him.

-Why were you alone with a guy at three a.m. at his place? -He looked up, in judgement. -Doesn't sound like something you would do.

She blushed. She couldn't tell him she was keeping an eye on her drugged friend who was trying to get clean, but she knew exactly what he was thinking she'd been doing.

-We were just talking. -She answered, honestly. -I was helping him. It's nothing wrong, really.

-It's none of my business, anyway. -He shrugged. -But then you're telling me he was with you, at his place when Chloe called you, and she was already at the school's grounds?

-Exactly.

-Are you sure? That doesn't fit.

-I'm sure, Desmond. I'm not stupid. -She rolled her eyes.

-You forget shit, you could be confused…

-I know I forget things, but this part I remember. -She explained.

-Ok, then you got to the school and what happened? -He waved her words away, pressing her to give more information.

-That's the problem… I think I passed out. It happens sometimes when I have a panic attack… I don't think I got to the school grounds, I must have passed out on the way there… In the middle of the street, apparently.

Desmond looked at her, with a serious expression. He got up and went to a cabinet, taking a transparent plastic bag with something inside it. It was a shirt. Her shirt.

-Belle… -He muttered looking at the shirt. -Do you know what this is?

He showed her an enormous stain on the front of her shirt. It was deep red, brown at the extremities.

-Blood? -She asked, looking down and pressing her belly to check for a wound.

-It's not yours. -He shook his head. -I'll send it for lab analysis, but I'm pretty sure I can guess who's blood it is, can you?

-Is Chloe ok? What happened to her? Oh God, that's a lot of blood! -She covered her mouth with her hand, scared by the thought of her friend bleeding that much.

He snorted and threw the shirt to the chair. Then he towered above her and took her jaw in his hand.

-Stop playing games, motherfucker. -He glared at her. -Why would it be Chloe's blood?

She looked at him, scared and confused. His grip to her chin was firm and started to hurt a bit.

-You're hurting me. -She muttered under his grip. -Why are you doing this?

He glared more fiercely.

-You're so lucky you're a girl, I would beat the shit out of you if you weren't. -He let go of her chin and rubbed his face with both hands. -Who's blood is it, Isabelle?

-I don't know. -She whined, rubbing her chin.

-Who did you kill tonight? -He asked her, glaring at her intently.

-What? -She was totally stunned.

He saw her face and sighed.

-How can you not remember killing someone? How is that even possible? -He grunted, his jaw firm as iron.

-I didn't kill anyone, what are you talking about? Look at me, I weigh a bit more than 100 pounds, I can't kill someone. -She whined and started to cry. -Why are you saying those things?

She cried and he watched her, in silence. There was a knock on the door and he was called by another cop. He left her alone, taking the plastic bag with the shirt inside it with him, and she cried until she was too tired and fell asleep.

By the afternoon there was another cop there. He questioned her and, in the end, she ended up having to tell them about Bill’s addiction and how she'd been playing an important part in his recovery. She explained that the school couldn't know about it because he might lose his scholarship and even have his career as a basketball player ruined, which would ruin his plans of going to college. The cop took notes with a stern look, making a sad face as she urged him not to ruin the boy's future. The next day she was questioned a bunch of times again, but never changed her version.

Desmond watched one of the questionings pacing around the room while she repeated the same thing she had said a couple of times before.

The doctor let her go, since she didn't seem to have a concussion and the fainting had been caused only by stress. She couldn't take her clothes back home, so they got her a shirt from a blood donation campaign. She insisted on getting a long-sleeved shirt, even though they didn't have one that fit her. Desmond drove her home in silence, and she forgot to say thanks or goodbye as she ran to her apartment, locked the door and cried until she fell asleep again.

She tried to call Bill, but he didn't answer. Maybe he felt abandoned by her, after all she left him alone when he needed her the most. She tried to call Chloe too, but she didn't answer either.

She considered calling Daniel, but she was afraid the police were monitoring her phone calls and didn't want to drag him into this mess. She cried more and tried to understand what happened.

In the end she gave up and called Desmond.

-Have you decided to talk? -His voice was tired and angry.

-Help me understand what I've done, please. -She said, sniffing. -Did I really hurt someone? Is Chloe alright?

-So you'll keep pretending you don't remember it? If you're gonna keep lying, don't waste my time! -He sighed. -Isabelle… It doesn't matter. We got the images anyway, you're screwed up anyway.

-What images? -She asked him, confused.

-The ones you and your friends tried to destroy. I got them. -He said in a nonchalant voice. -And I'm gonna get the recordings of last night too, so, don't worry, you won't have to confess, ‘cause they'll show you how you killed him when you get on trial. Don't call me again.

He hung up and she stared at the phone, stunned and trembling.

She didn't go to school the next day. Her head was hurting terribly and she felt guilty for abandoning Bill. She knew he would be alone and would need someone to support him. She hoped he hadn't given up and got stoned.

She took a shower and went to his place, with her hair still wet.

When she got there, she saw a bunch of cops getting in and out of his house.

-Hey! -She ran towards the door and shouted at them. -What are you doing? Leave him alone, he doesn't deal, he's just addicted!

One cop noticed her and looked from the house to her back and forth.

-Do you live here? -He looked down at her.

-No. -She blushed, thinking he was mocking her. -My boyfriend lives here.

-Oh… -He looked around and sighed. -Well… Hm… There's not an easy way of saying it… Your boyfriend's name… Was it William?

-Yes, that's him. -She nodded. -He's addicted, but he's a good person, he just needs help. You can't take his things. Do you even have a warrant to take those things?

She glared at a cop that passed by, carrying his notebook.

-Look, lady… Your boyfriend… He passed away on Saturday morning. I'm sorry for your loss.

 

Chapter 4


She blinked, trying to understand what he was saying.

-He… What? -She looked at him and felt a strange taste in her mouth. It was sour and salty.

-I'm so sorry. Do you want me to call someone to come get you? You don't look so well. Are you feeling sick? -The cop put his hand on her shoulder, but she shoved it away and took a few steps back.

She lost her balance and fell to the grass, feeling dizzy, then crawled to her side and vomited. She started to cry, desperately.

-Oh no, are you ok? -He tried to help her get to her feet, but her legs were weak and throbbing. She fell to the floor again and started to sweat.

-It's ok, leave it to me. -She heard a firm voice as her body was lifted from the ground.

-It was my fault, I just told her that her boyfriend passed away, I should have been more… I’m so sorry. -The cop was very worried.

-She'll be ok, go back inside, they need help there. -Desmond's voice was as cold as his gaze as he looked into her eyes, but the intense warmth of his body numbed her senses and she leaned on his chest, seeking for protection.

He seated her inside his car and got in, closing the doors with more strength than needed. He snorted as he stared at the wheel, shaking his head and clenching his jaw.

-I'm gonna ask this just once, Isabelle. -He sighed as he turned to look straight into her eyes. -What the hell are you doing here?

She wiped the tears and looked at the house.

-I came to check if he was doing fine… -She answered, sobbing violently.

-How in the world would it make sense? -He asked her, impatiently, gripping at the wheel. -Do you realize how guilty you’d look? Do you understand that you’re fucking lucky I was the one who caught you here?

-I didn't know. Did I kill him? -She asked him, starting to cry again. She sobbed so violently that she started to cough.

-Don't you dare throw up inside my car! -He warned her. -Calm down or I can’t help you.

-You said I killed someone. You said that the blood on my shirt… You said it wasn't Chloe's blood. Was it Bill’s?

He nodded.

-Oh my God! -She sobbed and pulled her hair, burying her head between her knees, while she curled into a ball on the seat.

-Stop crying. -He said with the same cold voice.

-Oh God, why? -She asked, clutching to her chest and shoulders, trying to find a position where her chest would stop hurting. -Why would I kill him? How? How did I do it? Desmond, please help me understand it!

-Maybe… -He started but lost his words as she stared at him with pleading eyes. He cleared his throat and looked away. -Maybe it wasn't you.

-What? -She looked up at him with eyes full of hope and despair.

-Maybe you were only in the wrong place at the wrong time. -He scratched his head. -I found it hard to believe, but now I'm starting to think it's a possibility, that you're just the unluckiest person I’ve ever met.

She stared at him, still sobbing.

-Are you saying Bill may still be alive? -She asked him, dumbfounded, sitting up.

-No, he's dead. I'm sorry for your loss. -He added seeing her face contorted with pain.

-What happened? How did he die? Why did you think it was me? How do you know it wasn't me? -She felt dizzy and realized she wasn't breathing. Are you taking me to jail? Oh my God, his parents, did someone tell them?

-Calm down, you're acting stupid. There's no point in panicking, you're gonna pass out. -He patted her shoulder, trying to calm her down. -You've been drugged, ok? That's the real reason why you passed out, someone drugged you.

-What? -She asked him, wiping her eyes with her sleeves. -That's ridiculous, how would someone drug me without me knowing?

-That's what I'm trying to find out. Was it the first time you slept over in Bill's house? Did he give you something to drink?

-No, I always come over when his parents are away, so he doesn't have to stay alone. His parents travel a lot, so he's left alone a lot too and gets stoned when he feels depressed. -She looked down, remembering his condition before she left him alone for the last time. -I only drank water I got directly from the tap myself. I took care of him, he never left the couch. I always took care of him when he needed. I live alone, so it's not a problem.

-Why do you live alone? -He furrowed his eyebrows. -You're only nineteen and you don't have a job. Who pays the bills?

-I thought you knew everything about me, detective. -She provoked him, clinging desperately to any subject that would take her mind away from her current dreadful situation.

-Look here, you little brat… -His face contorted with rage.

-Don't get mad, I'm sorry. -She winced. - I pay my own bills, my parents left me some money... I only use the investments incomes and the stock earnings. I keep the expenses low enough, so I don't eat it up. I got myself emancipated when I turned fifteen to get rid of my relatives that were trying to spend it all at once.

-How did you get emancipated in New York? -He examined her with a puzzled look.

-It was… Complicated… But my family's lawyers are very good, and we proved to the court that it was the best for me… -She glanced down to her arm and then looked away. -I wasn't in a good shape under guardianship.

-Did you live by yourself since you were fifteen?

-Yes. -She nodded, sniffing and trying to block the uncomfortable memories.

-Ah… -He was speechless. -Must have been tough.

-Believe me, it was way better than when I lived with my aunt. -She held her forearm and sighed. -But I learned a bunch of things, and I feel a lot more capable than my colleagues too… Maybe a bit of responsibility would do them good.

-I think it's more about your character than opportunities… -He shrugged. -You could lay on drugs, or just rebel and do nothing, but you decided to focus on your studies. Your parents would be proud.

-I don't know. I don't think they would even notice it, if they were alive. -She looked at the house and her throat hurt again. -They didn't have much time for me back then. They worked a lot. Just like Bill’s...

Her eyes filled with tears and she looked at him just to avoid looking out the window. He sighed and observed her face intently.

-You're not a very happy person, are you? -He said absentmindedly, almost to himself.

-Everyone… Everything around me seems to be broken… -The tears rolled through her cheeks as she forced a bitter smile. -I don't think happiness should be my main concern right now.

She cried silently with both hands covering her face. He watched her with a blank expression, then looked away and waited until she lifted her head again.

-I'm gonna get to death row, won't I? -She whispered without looking at him, wiping the tears on her already soaked sleeves.

-No. -He shook his head. Then added as she looked straight into his eyes, surprised. -I believe in you. I don't think you took part in any of those two events. I think you just have bad luck and very bad timing.

She just stared in silence.

-I'm gonna help you, Belle. We'll find out what you forgot, ok? -He smiled. -In return, you'll tell me anything, anything you remember or find out. Do we have a deal?

He held out his hand for her to shake. She looked at it for a few seconds, then took it, but didn't shake it, just held it firmly.

-Why do you do this? -He made a face at their intertwined fingers.

-What?

-You don't shake the hand, you just hold it in this awkward position. Don't do that, it's a bit disturbing…

-I'm sorry. -She tried to retrieve her hand, but he held it.

-I asked why you do that. I don't like having to repeat myself. -His frown deepened and she flinched. -When I ask you something, you answer.

-I don't know why I do that, your hand is warm and big, it feels good holding it. -She shrugged, sniffing. -I'm sorry, I'll try not to do that again.

He took his hand away and put it on the wheel.

-Where do you want me to take you? -He sighed. -I think his parents came back this morning and they're gonna hold a funeral. I'm not sure when, though, I hadn't read the report yet, but his body was supposed to be released only by afternoon.

-I don't like funerals. -She shook her head and her eyes brimmed with tears again. -I don't wanna see him like that...

-People will talk if you don't show up, won't they? After all, he was your boyfriend, right? -He checked, just to be sure.

-I don't really care about what people say. -She shrugged, ignoring his question. -I care about the truth, and I need to know the truth now. He deserved it too, he was a good guy, he deserved way better than dying this young. I need to know who did this and make sure they suffer the consequences under the law.

He stared at her as the corner of his mouth lifted in an empathetic smile. They stared into each other's eyes for a while and she felt calm and safe.

-There's something I wanna show you… I know it's gonna look bad and you might think I did something wrong… But I don't wanna hide things from you. -She looked away. -Can you drive us to the school?

He nodded and started the car without making questions. She was opening up, and he wanted her to have time to organize her thoughts this time.

They arrived at school at the start of the first break between class periods. There were a bunch of students lying on the grass or leaning against the trees. It was a beautiful sunny day.

Desmond avoided them, parking near the woods that bordered the west side of the school grounds, as she asked him to. They got out of the car and walked together.

-Where the hell are you taking me, Belle? -He grabbed her wrist after they walked a bit too deep into the woods.

-We call it a sex cabin… -She avoided his gaze.

-What? -He grimaced and took his hand away from her as if touching her skin had burned his hand.

-I didn't go to that place often. I've been there only once, for a party… -She blushed. -But me and Chloe, we went away as soon as we realized they wanted to get us drunk and rape us. I've never been there again after that night.

-You shouldn't have been there in the first place. -He scolded her. -Whose cabin is it?

She shook her head and shrugged.

-All I know is that the football team used it as a sort of HQ… They took girls there, they told us there would be a party and that everyone would be there, but when we got there, it was only full of men. -She shivered again. -Most of the times there were more men than women, I think it was easier for them to hold the girls down if they tried to run away or fight against it.

-That's awful. Did you tell the principal? Did you look for the authorities? -He asked her.

-Hell, no. Imagine if the principal would punish the whole football team… They would probably shut us up and pretend it didn't happen.

Desmond looked at her, looking like he would protest, but shook his head and signaled her to keep leading him.

They arrived at the cabin and he opened the lock without any trouble. The smell inside was awful as there was stale food and drugs spread on the table and couch.

-Holly crap… -He grunted, taking his cellphone and illuminating the small cabin.

Belle reached out and turned on the lights with a switch on the wall. He smiled at her and put his phone back in his pocket.

-Did they rape you? - He examined her face. -You don't need to be ashamed, I won't judge you and I won't tell anyone.

-No, Daniel got us out before things got worse. -She brushed her sleeve with her hand and trembled at the memory. -I never felt so scared, not even on the night of the fire that killed my parents. When I told them I wanted to go home, two of them shoved me to the floor and started laughing. They said I would go home only after I earned it.

He looked at her face and nodded.

-Daniel took part in those parties?

-No, he came after us. He rescued us. -She frowned. -I never asked him how he found out we were here, we avoid talking about it. But I'm sure he never took part in it. He's not this kind of person.

-Were you two the only girls here on that day? - He asked, opening the cabinet to look inside.

-And a newcomer. She was crying a lot when we got here, but she didn't tell us what they did to her. -She closed her eyes and made a disgusted face. - Her clothes were totally ripped, though, and her lipstick was all over her face...

He sighed.

-How many?

-How many men? -She asked, puzzled.

-Yes.

-Eleven. The whole main football team.

He closed his eyes and shook his head.

-We asked around and found out they did it for as long as they were on the team. The former football team used to do this too, it was some kind of tradition. They filmed the girls and blackmailed them, so they wouldn't talk.

He nodded, as he found a notebook. He checked if it was charged and put it aside. He took pictures of the drugs and from stains on the couch and carpet.

-Do you think Daniel got angry? Did he seem angry?

-He was furious. -She nodded. -He even said…

She froze, shutting her mouth and frowned.

-He said…? -Desmond looked up. -Tell me.

-He didn't kill them. -She glared at him, offended. -Don't do this, don't try to make it look like Daniel killed them as revenge. I trusted you, I showed you this place.

-Fuck you! -He scolded. -You can't tell me how to conduct my investigation!

-He didn't do it. -She crossed her arms and averted her eyes.

-Good, are you gonna cry? Are you gonna pout and make a fuss? -He glared at her. -Grow up, Belle! Someone killed those bastards. Just because they were pieces of shit that deserved it, that doesn't mean it's right to let someone get away with murder.

She was worried for Daniel. She felt very anxious and tried to think of a way of cleaning his image.

-Thank you for showing me this place, anyway. Too bad it's too late. You should have gone to the police right away, so they could be judged and condemned. -He pointed to some HDs he found. -I'm pretty sure we'll find nasty things in those. It would have enough material to get them to serve a couple of years. You should have come to us, not to Daniel.

-He saved us. -She protested, panting

-I'm not telling you he didn't. I'm glad he was there. I'm glad he stepped up and had the courage to intervene. -He nodded. -Still, after that, you should have come to us. It would've saved eleven lives and put them in jail. It would also have made it possible to hold the school accountable for allowing this to happen here. You should be able to trust justice and authorities.

She looked away. She didn't think it would happen as he said, but she didn't want to argue with him, as she didn't want to get him angry. She was suddenly aware she was alone with a man that had twice her weight, with shoulders twice as broad as hers and that had a gun on his hip, on a place they called “sex cabin”. He could easily subjugate her and no one knew they were here. She stepped back, away from him, and stumbled against a trunk, falling down and hitting her head on the side of the table. The trunk had a padlock in it, with a password.

-Are you ok? - He helped her get up. Holding her by the waist to steady her. -Did you get hurt?

-No, please, don't! -She pushed him and got away.

He looked at her with a puzzled look and turned to the trunk. He got a baseball bat nearby and broke the padlock, lifting the lid. Seeing him doing it so easily, she got even more afraid of him. He sighed and looked away. Inside there was a bunch of stuff, lacy panties, bras, headbands, and pictures of girls in shameful positions, some of them with parts of naked masculine bodies all around them.

-Don't look. -He warned her, but it was too late.

She staggered and stumbled on the carpet, leaning against the couch for balance and letting out a shriek as she jumped away from it. Only then she recognized the sensation: she was having a panic attack.

-Belle? - He tried to get her to look into his eyes. -Stop breathing like that, you're gonna pass out! Belle, look at my face, what is happening?

She put her hand to her chest as if she was having a heart attack. Her eyes were wide open and she darted them in all directions, getting more and more desperate as she took the details of the cabin in. There was a rope on one corner, there was a stick that looked like a horse whip leaning by the couch, there were dirty sheets piled up on another corner and a huge amount of bottles and cans of alcoholic beverages that filled half a wall.

-Let me take you out of here. -He grabbed her as she shoved him away, kicking him when he approached. -Stop! Calm down, let me take you out of this place, calm down, Belle!

She tried to get rid of his hands as he tried to restrain her. She cried and sobbed, taking shallow breaths and feeling dizzy. He managed to take her in his arms, locking her arms to his chest and her legs to one side. She bit his neck and shoulders, hard.

-Stop, motherfucker, I'm trying to help you! -He put her on the ground right outside the cabin and rubbed his neck. -Calm down, what got you started?

He crouched in front of her and put his hands on her cheeks, forcing her to look into his eyes. She started to calm down, breathing deeply, her tears soaking his hands and wrists.

-Holly crap, I thought you were possessed. -He was sweating and panting. -What happened?

She reached on in a pocket and took a small Ziplock bag, opening it with trembling fingers. Inside there were some white unbranded pills.

She took one and was about to swallow it, but he quickly slapped her hand and picked up the pill from among the leaves.

-What the fuck is that? You said you didn't do drugs. -He snatched the plastic bag from her hand.

-Give it back, it's a medicine, just relaxing pills. -She tried to get it back, but he held it out of her reach.

-I read your medical history, you don't have a prescription for relaxing pills. You haven't been to a psychologist or psychiatrist since you were thirteen. Don't try to lie to me. -He glared at her.

She blushed.

-I'm not lying. They aren't mine, but they are just relaxing pills, I take them and they help me get better when things go wrong.

-You shouldn't auto medicate, it's dangerous. -He reprimanded her and put the plastic bag inside his wallet. -I'll keep it and send this for analysis. Did Daniel give this to you?

She nodded.

-It’s his mother's.

-Of course it is. -He said ironically.

-He was just trying to help me. -She added.

-Of course he was… -He glared at her as if she was stupid. -Don't ever take pills someone gives you, unless they are your doctor.

She looked up at him and blushed. She wasn't stupid, she just trusted her friend. The pills helped her fall asleep and stopped her panic attacks that happened now and then since she was twelve.

-Let's get back, I'll have someone collect evidence here later. -He got up and locked the door. - I don't feel like leaving you alone after what I just witnessed. Do you have somewhere to stay?

-Sometimes I stay at Chloe's, when things get out of hand.

-Chloe is an outlaw now, if you can reach her, she'll have an appointment with the justice before you two can hang out. -He said as if it was something normal to say. -I don't think her father is in a good shape to take care of you today, he was very unsettled.

-Outlaw? Why? -She looked at his face, confused.

-Well, she probably killed your boyfriend. And even if she didn't, she tried to destroy crime evidence and she might have something to do with the terrorist attack. And she ran away when a cop tried to approach her to interrogate her too.

Belle blinked. She didn't know what to say, so she just looked down.

-Do you have someone that can take care of you tonight? And don't say Daniel, or I'll get really annoyed.

She shook her head.

-There's no need to. I'll be fine.

-Like hell you will. You bit me. -He showed her the marks on his neck.

-Are you poisonous? -She said ironically, wiping the dried tears from her cheeks. Then she got serious as his face turned sullen. -I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking straight. I'm really sorry for hurting you.

-It was nothing… Still, you were out of control. -He put an arm around her shoulder and started leading her back to the car. -What do you do when this shit happens if you're alone?

-I take a pill and sleep. -She shrugged. -I feel better when I take the pill.

-You can't live your life based on drugs. That's wrong. -He scolded her. -Why did that asshole give you those pills anyway?

-What do you mean? He just wants to help me, cause I have trouble sleeping. -She took his arm away and walked alone. -His mother has trouble sleeping too, so he gets some of her pills and gives them to me.

-Ah, then it's alright… He just takes his mother's pills and gives them to you. -He nodded. -You can have them back, then…

-Really? -She smiled and held out her hand to receive the pills back.

-Of course not, are you crazy? -He grimaced at her. -Unbelievable. How can you be so smart and so naive at the same time? Don't take those pills anymore, you may be damaging your brain! There's a reason why they don't sell it without a prescription…

By the time they got to the car, the students had gone back to the building. Soon they would be released again for lunchtime. He sighed and looked at her. Then he took a brand-new pack of chewing gum from his glove compartment and handed it to her.

-Here, when you feel like having a pill, chew one. - He snorted and took another for himself. -bloody hell… What am I supposed to do with you, Belle?

-Just drop me by my house, I'll be fine. -She sighed at the mint refreshing taste, as she had been feeling nauseated. -Thank you for worrying enough to want to do something, though…

He stared at her for a long time, sitting and tapping the wheel. She liked the feeling of having him observing her, not angry or annoyed, but with affection.

-Do you drink coffee? -He smiled, finally.

-Yes. -She nodded. -If mocha and cappuccino count as coffee.

-It counts, if you're a baby. -He chuckled. -I know a place that serves the best doughnuts in the world. They also have a nice expresso. They probably have a decent mocha or cappuccino. Even if they don't, their hot chocolate is really good. Wanna stop?

She smiled shyly. Are you calling me out for a date? She wanted to ask him but was afraid of being rejected again, so she just nodded slowly.

He smiled back and started the car, throwing glances at her from time to time as he drove.

 

Chapter 5


He was an amazing company, when he wasn't frowning or cursing. She knew he was only playing the therapist part, trying to make sure she was fully recovered from the trauma, or at least enough so he could drop her by her house without feeling guilty, but it felt good.

He started the conversation in light waves, encouraging her to talk by giving trivial information about himself, then asking about her. Her mood lifted slowly, with sudden drops every time her mind drifted toward Bill's death. She cried twice and he tried to get her to think about something else.

They talked about the weather, then he tried to talk about trips, but she told him she had never traveled. Desmond seemed surprised but let go when he realized the subject was making her feel uncomfortable. They talked about silly things and eventually he managed to make her laugh. He tried every subject that came to his mind, until he finally found a common ground: they both were foodies.

-Not even to make tea or warm a cup of milk? You spent one whole year, living by yourself, without getting near the cooker? -He looked scandalized, as he took a big bite on his doughnut. -That's horrible, I think I would die if I had to eat only microwaved food and salad for a year! Good thing you got over it.

-So you too know how to cook? -She wiped the tears of joy from the corner of her eyes. Her mouth was hurting from laughing.

-I'm not a great chef, but I get along. My fiancée never complained. -He shrugged.

-Oh… -She used her fingers to cut a small piece of her doughnut and put it in her mouth so she wouldn't have to talk for some time.

-But now you'll have to tell me, what type of food do you like to cook?

She shrugged, still shocked by the information that he had a fiancée. What am I doing here? I thought you wanted to know me better… She had been sure that he had some interest in her, not only because of the flirting smiles and winks, but because he clearly was very jealous of her. Especially with Daniel. Every time she said his name, Desmond's eyes would lit up like bonfires and he would make a negative remark.

-I don't mean to brag, but my food is surprisingly good. -She swallowed and took a sip on her hot chocolate. -I cook all sorts of foods... Pasta, roasted, pastry, cakes… I've been learning some Chinese, Thailand, and Japanese techniques… I like to create some recipes too. Sometimes I call my friends over and cook for them...

She noticed she had started talking nonstop and took the cup to her lips to shut herself up. What must his fiancée look like? She must be a top model, at least…

-Really? I love Asian food… But I don't know how to cook it, I just order from delivery. -He smiled, taking another doughnut. -Did you like those? I'm feeling like I'm eating way more than you.

-They are very good, just too big for me. I'm eating this one out of pure gluttony. -She smiled back, putting another small bite in her mouth.

He nodded and looked down.

-So… How long do you cook for your fiancée? -She tried to get more information, even though all hope was gone. She would never approach an engaged man. -Do you cook together?

-Ah, no. She never liked to cook. I always wondered if she would try to get better at it after we got married. -He dipped his finger on the red cream and licked it, making a face. Then he chuckled and shook his head with a smirk. - Once, she burned an egg, trying to boil it. Can you believe it? The entire house smelled as if an old fat lady had farted all over the place for weeks!

He looked away and sighed.

-Yeah, here's something I'll never miss... I really don't miss it at all! -He smirked. -Waking up to the smell of something burning. It used to happen quite often.

-What? -She turned her head sideways, not sure if she understood it. -Did she go away?

-Ah, no. -He shook his head. He took a bite of the doughnut, eating almost half of it at once. -She died.

There was an uncomfortable silence. She observed him with a blank expression, as he chewed, not knowing what she could say.

-Was it recent? -She felt stupid for being jealous, and a terrible person for feeling relief that he was still single. She blushed with shame and added quickly. -Sorry for your loss.

-No, it was two years ago. Don't be sorry, there's nothing you can do about it. -He shrugged, still chewing the doughnut inside his mouth. -Did you like the hot chocolate?

She nodded and took another sip. They stayed silent and then the curiosity took over and she couldn't keep it to herself.

-What happened? -She couldn't hold her curiosity.

He grimaced and looked down.

-She got killed... In a robbery attempt. -He said, simply.

-Oh… Was that the reason why you joined the police? -She asked, curious.

-What? No, I'm an inspector, a supervisory special agent, most people take at least 6 years to get to my rank and I even refused a promotion. -He seemed offended. -Did you think I was a recruit? A trainee?

-I'm sorry, I have no idea what you're talking about…

He frowned, but let it go.

-Why did you skip a promotion? -She looked up.

-Because I've been working on a case for more than two years now… If I had accepted the promotion, it would be handed to someone else. -He shrugged. -I can get promoted after I close this case.

She looked surprised, but just observed him, taking in his expression, trying to understand what it meant. She couldn't tell if he was angry, sad, frustrated, proud, annoyed… His face was undaunted. That was the only way to describe it.

-What's on your mind? -He asked her, suddenly and she realized she had been staring at him for a long time.

-Nothing. -She put another piece of the doughnut in her mouth.

-I told you before… I never ask the same question twice. Answer me. -He leaned back with an authoritarian tone.

-I was just admiring how handsome you are. -She meant to sound ironic, but it sounded flirty.

-Oh… -He blushed and looked away.

Oh my God, he can act shy! She was totally amused. For a moment she could understand why Chloe enjoyed making the boys go purple in shame at her indecent proposals. It felt good to have the upper hand once.

-Are you done? -He tilted his head to point to the almost empty plate. She looked through the window, surprised by the sight of the sun going down. -We'd better get going.

-I'll just go to the toilet… -She bet she had a bunch of sugar on her face and chest.

-Alright, I'll pay and wait for you outside. -He used the paper napkins to wipe his face and hands. There was still a bit of sugar on his nose but she didn't tell him.

-Let's split. -She bent over to get her wallet inside her backpack.

-No. I'm the one who invited you, I've got this. -He dismissed her. -Go do your girl things, I'll wait for you inside the car.

She nodded and went to the bathroom. She rinsed her mouth and washed her face and hands. She felt ridiculous when she realized her mouth and the tip of her nose were slightly red because of the sprinkles. The tip of her thumb and first finger were stained and she couldn't clean it up even as she rubbed it vigorously. She cleaned her nose, although it was still a bit red because of the rubbing. She didn't insist too much on the mouth though. Not being used to wearing lipsticks, her mouth never looked that red. She liked it.

She cleaned her shirt, even though the sleeves of the long-sleeved shirt she was wearing under it were stained with colorful dots. She sighed and went out.

When she got to the parking lot, she was stunned by the scene. Desmond was leaning on his car while Daniel shoved his finger in front of his face, calling him a pedophile and saying he should be ashamed of himself. He threatened going to the police and filing a charge, saying he had kidnapped her. Desmond yawned and looked away, ignoring him.

-There you are… Was the sight that good, or did the doughnuts give you a bellyache? -He walked and opened up the door for her.

-What's going on? -She looked from him to Daniel, confused. -What are you doing here, Daniel?

-What are you doing here? Your boyfriend dies and you go have a fling with a pedophile? -Daniel shouted. A lot of people looked in their direction. Desmond waved and leaned on his car again.

-C’mon, Belle, he's just jealous that you didn't want to have a fling with him… Let's take you home. -He shrugged. -Just ignore him and he'll go away, like a Jehovah’s witness.

She couldn't hold back a chuckle, but didn't move. She looked into Daniel's eyes.

-How did you know I was here? -She squinted her eyes. -And since when did you start talking to me like that?

-I didn't know you were here. I came to buy some doughnuts for Bill's parents and saw this pedophile leaning on that car. He was waiting for someone, so I connected the dots. - Desmond let out a loud mocking laugh. Daniel glared at him, then shrugged. -And since when do you go out with men that are twice your age?

-He's not that old! And we weren't doing anything wrong, I was feeling down, I had a panic attack and he bought donuts for us. -She embraced herself. -He was nice… I feel better now, the pain inside is lighter, that was only that.

-Can't you see? The pedophile takes you to a hole far away from your home and your friends and feeds you sugar! Can't you understand what's happening here? -Daniel shook his arms in front of her as if to illustrate the obvious. -It's John and Mary, but the witch has a large and thick dick!

-Why, thank you for the free advertising. -Desmond mocked again. -C’mon Belle, I still have to fill out some reports today and check the material they got from the cabin. Let's go.

-This conversation isn't over, Daniel. I'm very upset with you. -She shook her head and walked in Desmond's direction.

-Did you take your pills? -He urged her. -Come with me, I'll take care of you.

-I'm fine, Daniel. I have an adult taking care of me right now, don't worry. -She glared at him. -Go home.

She started getting inside the car but stopped and put her head out.

-Daniel, if Chloe calls you, tell her to go directly to the police or call me. -She said, her eyes full of worry. -Tell her we'll get through this, no matter what.

-What are you talking about? -Daniel frowned.

-Leave this to me. -Desmond told her and pushed her shoulder to get her inside the car. He closed the door and walked toward Daniel.

She couldn't hear what he said to him, but Daniel's eyes opened wide and he took his hand to his mouth, backing away a few steps. Desmond watched it without moving an inch. He then glanced at Belle and said something that made Daniel’s face go very red. For a moment she thought he would punch the policeman in the face, but the muscles of Desmond's arms and back responded immediately to the menace, and he corrected his posture. The agent said something else, and, this time, Daniel seemed to have had enough.

He took a few steps back again and shook his head, looking into her with murdering eyes. Then, he gave his back to them and walked toward the doughnut store.

Desmond stared at his back until he disappeared through the door, then got into the car.

-What happened? What did you tell him? -She asked him.

-I let him know that he's gonna see me a lot more now. -He smirked, starting the car, and maneuvering it using only one hand. She flushed as she noticed how seducing his movements were. -And I might have told him that if I find out he's been abusing you through drugs I'm gonna rip his penis off and make him swallow it.

She gasped and winced.

-Why did you do that?

-’Cause it's what I've been willing to tell him ever since I found out he's been drugging you. -He shrugged. -Don't you realize how wrong this is?

-He was only trying to help me. Sometimes something looks wrong but is right. -She shrugged. -It's as he said, it looked weird that you and I...

-I swear to God, if you try to compare me taking you to eat some doughnuts to make you feel better, to that asshole giving you drugs to keep you coming back to him, I'm gonna turn around and leave you with him. -He glared at her.

She shut up as she was exactly about to do that.

-I don't get you. -He shook his head after a while, in frustration. -You're simply unbelievable.

-I beg your pardon? -She looked up, confused.

-You're smart and funny… You're mature for your age and you look after the people you care about. You have responsibility when it comes to money and housing. -He pointed out, tapping on the wheel at each affirmation. -But you're an imbecile at reading people. Really, thick as a plank. Look at the friends you keep around you! Could they be any worse?

-Don't talk like that about my friends! -She almost screamed, offended. -You don't know anything about them!

-A boy addicted to heroin whose parents don't even seem to care that he died; a miniature of a whore that is so dumb, she tried to break into a room the police was monitoring; a wannabe hacker that is stupid enough to try to invade an FBI account; a drug dealer that has been drugging you since God knows when, to God knows what purpose and think he's God himself... -He counted in his free hand. -And then there's you. You're a diamond on a pigpen. You're diving into mud and shit and you're smiling all along! Why do you do that to yourself? Do you want to punish yourself for something?

He snorted harshly and shook his head. She didn't say anything. She had been feeling so good for the last hours, and now she was feeling worse than before. She embraced herself and leaned toward the door, trying to put distance to him.

After some minutes he pulled over in front of her apartment.

-Look… -He muttered. -I'm really sorry for what I just told you. I meant every word, but I know it's not my place to tell you those things. I hope someday you'll realize it's all true and that I meant you no harm. For now, all I can do is apologize...

She didn't look up.

-Thank you for the doughnuts… And the chewing gum… And the ride. -She said, slowly. -But I just realized you don't have a warrant to confiscate my pills, so I'd like to have them back.

He frowned and stared at her, dumbfounded.

-Please? -She looked up with an innocent face.

His brows furrowed even harder.

-Why don't you file a formal complaint at the precinct? I'll wait for your visit there. -He bent toward her and for a moment she thought he was going to kiss her in the mouth, but he just opened up the door for her. -Get out of my car.

She stared at him and sighed, getting out, reluctantly. She got into the apartment and rubbed her forehead, realizing she was craving for the pills.

-It's ok, I don't need to relax… I have a bunch of things to organize and think about, I don't really need those pills. -She told herself, cleaning her sweaty hands on her pants.

The next day she wouldn't go to school again. She would put her life back on track.

She sat down and began to write a list of places where Chloe could be hiding herself. Her friend needed help, her other friend deserved justice for his murder and she herself needed answers, so there was no time to feel sorry for herself.

 

Chapter 6


It was Chloe's messy handwriting, even though it was shaken and blurred by water (or tears).
She had come with the idea of looking at the cafe after considering asking for Daniel's help.

Chloe's phone and backpack were with the police, at least that's what her father has told. He begged Belle to not go after his daughter, to leave her be, that she would eventually come back if she believed no one was looking for her. He was a mess. Belle felt very sorry for him and tried to comfort him, saying she didn't believe his daughter had anything to do with the murders. He wasn't that sure, though.

She had asked for her cappuccino, at first hoping that a hooded girl would approach her and sit on her table. But then she had the idea of asking the barman if someone had left a message for her, Daniel, Trevor, or William. The barman started to shake his head, but then remembered that someone left a note and a bill for Daniel to pay.

The message read. “You lied. 2 a.m. Under bleachers. If > Friday = I +cups+ belly.”

She must be “belly”. Belle furrowed her eyebrows and bit her lower lip. You lied… Daniel lied? Chloe would wait for him under the exploded bleachers of the gym at 2 a.m. until Friday… After that she would go to the cops? And to Belle?

She frowned, reading the message again and again, not finding another meaning.

-What's that, a love letter from that asshole? What is it, this time? -Daniel's voice startled her. She looked up and wrapped the paper, putting it inside her pocket. She put it deep down, making sure it wouldn't fall off.

-I… Yes, he's asking me to go out on a date tonight. -She lied, trying to avert her eyes.

-You're not thinking about going, right? -He asked her, incredulous. -You already lost two days of school, Belle, this guy is messing up with your head to get on your pants. Chloe is fine, she'll probably come back and explain to the police that she wanted to play a prank or something. You don't need to seduce the guy to free her face from trouble.

She looked away, uncomfortable. He hadn’t said a word about Bill. They were used to avoiding bad subjects, for Belle’s mental health’s sake, but still, it was their beloved friend. She couldn’t believe he cared more about her supposed relationship with Desmond than the terrible event of their friend’s death.

-Do you want another cappuccino? I'm gonna pay my debt, I can pay yours too. -He said nonchalantly, clearly unaware of her brimming eyes.

-Ah, no, let me pay for your coffee today, as a peace sign after our fight. -She muttered clumsily. He stopped tapping on the table and tilted his head.

-You don't need to do that, Belle… You know you don’t. -He shook his head and tried to put his hand over hers.

-I was going there to get a licorice stick, it's ok. -She faked a smile, nervously, getting up to avoid his touch. -Expresso? Short?

She grimaced as she realized this was what Desmond ordered the day before.

-Long, with cream. -He corrected her, frowning and scrutinizing her.

She rushed to the counter and discreetly pulled the bartender’s sleeve to call his attention. When he looked at her, startled by her attitude, she smiled and slid a fifty dollar’s bill in his direction, asking him to never tell Daniel or anyone else about the note he gave her earlier. He slid the bill back, saying she didn't need to pay for it, that he would keep it only between them, giving her a wink, but she slid it back and asked him to take it as a tip for his kindness, then. She never bribed anyone, so she didn't understand his gloomy look, as he took it.

She came back to the table sliding the cup of coffee in Daniel's direction and chewing on the licorice stick.

-Are you ok? -He asked her, seeing her tapping nervously at the table.

-Yes… I'm just thinking that I shouldn’t go to the meeting. -She eyed him, looking for any sign that he knew what she was talking about.

-The date with that pervert? Of course you will. That guy just wanna fuck you and discard you, Belle. -He frowned angrily. -He's a cop, he's not willing to hold hands and brush your hair.

-I know, Daniel, but he can help us get Chloe out of prison if worse comes to worst. Aren't you worried about her? -She needed to be sure that there was really something wrong with him.

-Hell, no! It's been time that chick learns a lesson. She’s too crazy for her own good. -He shook his head. -Besides, she never had any justice problems. She'll probably have to serve soup for beggars, it'll be good for her. Or for the beggars, who'll get to see some cleavage.

He smirked and looked away.

-I'm worried about her well-being. Do you have any idea where she could be? -She asked him.

-No… I was half hoping she would appear at our table wearing a hood. -He laughed and shook his head. -She's not clever enough to avoid the police for that long, she's gonna appear soon, don't worry.

She nodded.

-Did he kiss you? Or put his hands on you?

-Who? -She asked, confused by the sudden change of subject. -Desmond?

-My father. Of course it's Desmond. -He rolled his eyes, irritated.

-No, he didn't touch me. He was nice, I'm telling you. -She said, calmly. -The only time he touched me was when I had a panic attack, and he was only trying to help me. If he hadn't restrained me, I think I could've hurt myself badly.

-Why didn't you take a pill? -He asked her, worried.

-I took it, right after. -She lied, unwilling to tell him that Desmond probably already asked some lab to analyze the contents of the pill and that his mother might have problems because of her stupid act of trying to take the pills in front of a cop. -I bit him...

-You what? -He laughed. -Did you draw blood?

-I hope not. I didn't feel the taste of blood, but it was a strong bite, I don't know how he didn't beat me in reflex. -She blushed, remembering him calling her a “motherfucker”. -He cursed me though. It must have hurt a lot.

-He probably deserved it. Maybe he'll think twice the next time he looks at you as if he wants to strip you.

-Why do you keep saying that? He never looked at me in an improper way. He even treats me like a kid sometimes. -She protested. -He's a good person, and even gentle, most of the time.

Daniel squinted his eyes, but shrugged.

-I gotta go, I didn't do the chemistry homework and I need to clean up the house tonight. -She avoided his eyes.

-Sure, go ahead. -He smiled. -And Belle…

He called her as she passed by him.

-Yes? -She was tense, thinking he might have read something in her eyes.

-Promise me you won't meet that asshole tonight.

She nodded and he sighed.

-Seriously, not tonight. Ok? -He squinted his eyes. She didn't answer.

She got out of the cafe but kept observing him from the other side of the street. After a while, he got up and talked to the barman, scratching his head and smiling. The barman shrugged and shook his head. His shoulders dropped slightly and he rubbed his mouth, contemplating.

What lie did you tell her, Daniel? What are you hiding from me?

She went home and paced, then decided she was gonna deal with it alone. Or almost alone.

 

Chapter 7


She emptied her backpack and put a bottle of water, two panties, one pair of socks, some packs of protein bars, one coat and a first aid kit. She sighed as she thought she might be committing a crime, but she couldn't let Chloe be arrested if she was innocent, and she didn't even know where to start to prove her innocence. What if she wasn't innocent? That's when she would need Desmond.

She looked down at the cellphone, not able to decide if she would or wouldn't call him before going to the school. She was gonna have to wait, anyway, she got time to decide.

She took a shower, drying her hair with a towel as she paced around and listed the pros and cons of trusting Desmond. She was nervous. Not only nervous, she felt electrical. Her brain didn't seem to be working properly, she was tired and agitated at the same time. Her stomach growled and she realized she hadn't had a proper meal the whole day.

Her phone rang.

-We need to talk. -Desmond's voice was somber. She shivered, thinking he had found out. She reached for her backpack and checked if the note was still there. How did he know? -Can I come over and take you somewhere? We can go somewhere public, I know it's late but I need to hear from you what's your explanation for what you did.

-What are you talking about? -She asked, sincerely confused. What do you mean by what I did?

-I'll come over in ten minutes. -He hung up and she stared at the screen, confused.

She still had four hours. Plenty of time for them to talk and for her to decide if she would ask for his help or not.

He stopped by in six minutes, not ten. She took her backpack with her, not wanting to risk getting late to meet Chloe.

-Are you planning on going somewhere? Leave the backpack behind. -He demanded as he walked over to open the door of the car for her.

-No, there's things here I'll need. -She answered getting in and holding the backpack to her chest.

-Did you get more pills with him? -He frowned heavily as he sat by her side. He fastened his belt, signaling her to do the same. -Don't lie to me, I know you met with him this afternoon.

-No. -She answered honestly. He checked her face to see if she was lying. Her fingers were trembling so much that she couldn't fasten her belt, and he had to do it for her.

-You don't look so well, are you feeling sick? Please don't throw up inside of my car.

-I'm not used to throwing up, it was only an accident, I was very nervous and anxious… -She blushed. -Besides, I haven't eaten today, so I don't have anything in my stomach to put out…

-Why didn't you eat? -He frowned again.

-I forgot. I'm hungry, though, I don't have a food disorder, don't worry… -She added, realizing he might think she was a sick person.

-I know, I read your medical history. -He shrugged, starting the car. -Do you like Japanese food? We can go to a sushi bar I know about.

-Are we going out on a date? -She gathered the courage to ask.

-No. -He answered bluntly. -I need to ask you some questions and Daniel hates Japanese food, so he won't have an excuse to meet us there.

He looked at her face intently, checking for her reaction. She blushed at the rejection, and felt uneasy about him knowing about Daniel’s distaste for sushi.

-I like Japanese food. I told you that before. -She muttered, seriously.

-Good… Look, I'm not flirting with you. -He added as he maneuvered and accelerated. -You're a witness. I'm trying to get information from you, that's all. I'm being nice with you because you're cooperating. If you stop, I'll treat you like I treat Daniel. Do you get it?

She nodded, but she didn't fully believe it.

-What about Chloe?

-What about her? Did she contact you? -He glanced in her direction. -Do you have some new information about her?

-What if she were willing to help you, and to give new information? -She ignored his questions, not wanting to lie to him. -Would you make sure she wasn't condemned?

-I could arrange an agreement for her, but she would have to be willing to talk. -He answered, trying to check on her while keeping his eyes on the road. -And she'd have to have something interesting to give to the police, especially if she killed someone.

Belle nodded, pressing her lips. She couldn't tell him, then. Not until she was sure Chloe was innocent and that whatever she knew would be useful for the police. She would meet Chloe first, then she would call him.

-What’s on your mind? -He asked. She found it disturbing. He always seemed to catch her red handed. Every time she was thinking about things she'd like to keep from him, he came up with that question.

-I wish she would come and ask for an agreement. I wish she has nothing to do with Bill's death and that she can explain what she did and why.

-Do you know something I should know about, Belle? -He reached out and took her chin, turning her face toward him, still with his eyes on the road. -Look at me when I'm talking to you. Are you hiding something from me?

She shook her head.

-Say it! -He frowned.

-No, Desmond. -She gulped.

-Belle… -He sighed. -You yourself might need to get an agreement after tonight. Don't fuck with me, if you know something, anything, tell me before I find it out myself.

She stared at him, still feeling the warmth of his grip on her chin. She nodded and sighed.

-Don't you have something to tell me now? - He pulled over in front of a narrow door and looked into her eyes. She shivered and shook her head. He clearly didn't believe her. -What the fuck have you done, girl?

He let it go and got out of the car, carrying a notebook case under his arm. He looked sideways, then came to her side and opened up the door for her, offering his hand for her to lean on. She grabbed her backpack, but he took it from her arms and threw it back inside the car, closing the door before she could retrieve it.

-You're not going anywhere. You don't need it. -He glared at her. Only then she realized he was worried about her trying to run away.

She nodded and followed him through the narrow door. A man greeted them by the corridor. It was a weird atmosphere, and she felt as if she was walking into a forbidden place. There were only Japanese customers inside, all of them very old and wearing expensive suits. She noticed all of them had at least one big golden ring on their fingers.

-Desmond… What is this place? -She was tense and tried to get as close as possible to him, grabbing his arm.

-It's a very traditional Japanese restaurant… -He noticed her reaction to the atmosphere and added in a nonchalant tone. -It belongs to a branch of the Yakuza.

Her eyes opened wide and she felt even more tense, pressing up her body against his. He put an arm around her and smiled.

-They won't harm you, don't be silly. -He looked at her and chuckled. -I wouldn't bring you here if it wasn't safe.

As they got deeper inside, an old woman with a sullen face guided them to a small cabin with a table and square pillows on the floor. Desmond took a seat and opened the notebook on the table.

The woman asked him something in Japanese. He nodded and answered something, only four or five words in what she guessed was Japanese too.

-Do you speak Japanese? -She asked him as the old lady bowed and left.

-Hell, no. I came here a lot of times. For... Business dinners...I memorized some phrases and now I can order things properly on my own. - He shrugged.

-Why did you choose this place to bring me? -She was a bit mad at him for bringing her to a place where the mafia ruled.

-First of all because only a few here can understand what we say, so we don't have to worry about eavesdropping. And they'll give us a lot of privacy... They are very discreet. -He gave her a meaningful look. -Secondly because if Daniel's crew decide to go crazy and invade the restaurant, I probably won't even have to take my gun out. And third, because the food is absurdly good, and I think I deserve it for what I'll have to endure because of you and your friends in the weeks to come.

She stared at him, not understanding his words completely.

-Where's your phone? Give it to me. -He commanded her, and she put her phone on the table, wondering why he needed it.

-Do you have another cellphone with you or in your apartment? -He asked her.

-No.

-Good. I'm confiscating it. -He put her phone inside a transparent plastic bag he took from his pocket and handed her a folded paper. -This is the warrant. You are officially a suspect from now on and there's nothing I can do about it. You may refuse to talk with me without a lawyer, but I would appreciate it if you kept our deal. I still believe in you, but I'll need your help to prove you're innocent, ok?

She was bewildered by his calm and unabashed attitude as he put her phone in his jacket’s pocket. She read the warrant but it didn't tell what she was being accused of, just gave him full permission to confiscate her electronic devices.

She pouted, but knew he wouldn't give her phone back anyway, so she just nodded. He seemed very satisfied with her posture and went on.

-Now, I want you to watch those videos and explain to me what happened. -He pointed up to the screen.

The old woman came back with two waitresses, both of them wearing traditional Japanese clothing. They served tea and sake for both of them, then filled the table with a bunch of small dishes, two of each. The sushi and sashimi were served last, but the woman urged them to eat it first. She did it in Japanese, and Desmond translated it for Belle. He bowed his head to her and Belle mimicked him. The old woman went away, sliding the door closed.

Belle watched Desmond as he wiped his hands with the hot towel and mimicked him. He leaned over and took the square cup containing the sake that they put in front of her.

-Since you're still a baby… You'll have only tea tonight. -He mocked her.

Then he took a nigiri with his hand and put it in his mouth, closing his eyes and moaning.

-Fuck! -He nodded and pointed at her dish. -Now that's what I'm talking about, try it!

She searched for the chopsticks, but as soon as she took it, he put his hand on her way and told her to use her fingers. She paused, unwilling, but did as he told her too. It was weird to feel it touching her skin, but she was very hungry. She nodded as she felt the amazing flavor of the rice and the fresh fish on her tongue.

-Oh my God, I think I never ate something that good! It must be very expensive. -She blushed, feeling guilty for him expending money on her.

-No, it's not, it's a very fair price. -He shook his head. -Now, watch the video, please.

She pressed the spacebar to play the video. She took some time to realize that the person in the images was herself. She frowned.

-You don't remember it, do you? -He asked her, observing her as he put another piece into his mouth. -Holly crap, this is so good!

She stared at the images feeling like she was being pranked. The Images couldn't be real, they never happened in her memories. It was so unnerving that she didn't pay any attention to what she was doing in them.

She sighed and pressed space, to watch it all over again. He urged her to eat more, but she felt dizzy and didn't move. She was paralyzed.

The images showed her looking around, not paying any attention to the stairs she found out about only a few days ago, with Desmond. She was holding her dress up, uncomfortable with the high heels that she wasn't used to wearing, especially on an uneven floor. Then Chloe got out of that door and ran down the stairs, grabbing her hands and jumping up and down on her platforms. Her dress was scandalous, with a bare back and very short and tight. Belle probably reprimanded her for it, as she turned around and pretended to be on a parade. She then pulled Belle's hand, forcing her to go up the stairs. Belle seemed uneasy and tried to resist, but ended up entering through the door, seeming afraid and unsure about what might be inside.

Desmond observed her, as he chewed. He took one nigiri with his own finger and put it in her mouth. She opened her mouth without even realizing it, as she pressed the spacebar to watch it again.

-You don't remember it, do you? -He repeated, analyzing her face intently.

-No, this is an awful sensation. -She said, not caring that her mouth was full.

He nodded and stopped the video. She tried to take his hand away as she wanted to watch it once again.

-I’m gonna show you another one, about twenty minutes after it. Those images are from the exterior of the building, the camera was hidden by the roof. We would never find it without you, Belle, you did something priceless for this investigation by showing me this place. -He then added. -I'm sure I would eventually find it, but you showed me the camera inside too, it saved us a bunch of time. Besides, they could have destroyed the recordings if we took too long.

She wasn't paying any attention to what he said, looking intently at her own figure on the screen.

In the images she saw herself getting down those iron stairs, with a zombie-like posture. She got out of the iron door with her head hanging down and leaned on the wall, putting her hands to her head and circling around on top of the stairs with her arms hanging around her. Then she leaned on the handrail and looked dizzy and sick. She threw up, shaking her head after it and putting both hands on her forehead. She made a gesture as if she would go back through the door but shook her head and went downstairs. She then sat on a step of the stair and grabbed her head with both hands, looking desperate. She got up and looked around, panting, as if trying to decide where to go. She started running toward one direction, stumbling on her dress, but then shook her head and ran the other way instead. She knew it was the direction of the gym’s entrance. A few seconds later there was a flash as the image went all white and the camera trembled and stopped recording.

-Do you remember that? -Desmond said, looking at her face. She shook her head. -About the camera inside… The images were half destroyed. They set fire to the room and damaged the HD where it was stored. Fortunately, there were two cops taking turns on watching the room so one of them extinguished the fire before it could destroy the DVR. It's a very old device, so it took us some time to be able to access it and retrieve the images. The principal didn't know the password… He didn't even know about the security cameras. The images were corrupted and we lost a bunch of them, including the ones recorded by the camera inside. I have a team working on it to recover the files we managed to get.

She was paralyzed, looking at the screen with horror.

-You should eat more, you look pale… Please, try to eat something, Belle. -He insisted, but she just stared at the screen.

He took another piece of sushi and put it in her mouth. It felt weird to be fed like a baby, but she opened her mouth anyway. She was feeling numb and dumbfounded. Her arms were tingling and her head was spinning.

Then her brain connected the facts and Belle started to tremble, shaking her head violently as she tried to look away from the recording. She sat back and tried to get away from the table, but her back hit a wooden wall. Desmond reached out and held her so she didn't put her weight to the wall.

-What is that? Did you remember it? -He asked her. -Did you remember what happened that night, Isabelle? Who was there with you? Do you remember it?

She looked at him with terrified eyes and hugged him tightly, starting to cry.

He pulled her to his chest and tried to calm her, as she sobbed silently. She was ashamed and confused and her chest hurt.

-Tell me what happened, Belle, please?

She just shook her head violently and sobbed. He grabbed the cup of tea and tried to force her to drink it, but she drooled it and pushed his hand away. He wiped her mouth and his wet shirt with a napkin and pushed her to take a good look on her face.

-You have to calm down. What's done is done. What happened, Belle?

-He did this to me… You were right all along... -She cried. -Why did he do this to me, Desmond?

-What, Belle?

-He hypnotized me. He used to do this when we were younger to help me stop thinking about bad things. I asked him to stop ‘cause I felt weird afterwards. I thought he only did it when I asked him to. - She sobbed. -He made me forget things… Why did he do this that day? Why did he make me forget? Why?

 

Chapter 8


-What the fuck are you talking about? -He shook his head, trying to get her to say something that made sense.

-I think he was there and that he got control over me… -She shook her head. -He hypnotized me.

-First of all, who is he? Daniel? Was he there with you? Was he inside? -He frowned. -Are you saying he was there and that he “hypnotized” you?

She nodded frantically, putting her hand over her mouth and sobbing.

-Are you saying he can control your mind? -He frowned. -Like make you do things and forget them?

-I think so. -She nodded, crying violently. -I think he knew about the explosion. I think I tried to warn the boys... I think he made me forget about it. Oh my god, why would he do all that?

-So, you still don't remember it? -He stared at her.

-No. -She looked down, wiping the tears with her sleeves. -But I know this posture I assumed, he hypnotized me. I'm sure.

-You must agree that's very hard to believe, Belle. I don't think a judge would believe it.

She nodded. He hugged her and let her cry on his chest. After some minutes she stopped crying and sat back on the pillow. He put his hand on her shoulder and pressed it.

-I'm sorry. I should've imagined you would feel bad if you saw it… I'm really sorry. -He grimaced. -Do you think you can still eat?

-I'm feeling very hungry. -She nodded.

He raised his eyebrows and pointed to the table, turning off the notebook and putting it away.

They ate in silence. Everything was delicious and she felt a lot better with a full stomach. When they finished it, they were both satisfied and not a single piece was left behind. He pressed a button on the wall and paid for the meal after the same old woman came back with a waiter that brought the check. He paid it with money instead of a card, but Belle was feeling so dizzy that she didn't manage to check how much he paid.

He helped her walk out of the building and led her to the car, helping her sit and fastening her belt for her. As they were about to leave, though, an old Japanese man knocked on his window. He opened the door and got out. They talked briefly, he took a note from the old man's hand and nodded. He bowed deeply and got back into the car, with a stern face.

-What's wrong? -Belle asked him.

His posture told her something wasn't right. He exhaled and said in a tired voice.

-Remember I told you Samantha died in a robbery? -He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he leaned his elbow on the wheel and took a deep breath.

-Your fiancée? -She frowned, puzzled.

-I lied.- He pressed his lips firmly and sighed, holding the wheel with both hands. -Short story, they wanted to get me but she was in the car with me, so they took her too. She died because I let them take us out of the car.

He looked through the mirror, analyzing the cars on the street.

-I can't let this happen again, so, I'm gonna get us out of here. -He handed her the piece of paper. It was a description of two cars and the plates. - They didn't follow us here. They got here a long time after we were already eating. I wonder how he knew exactly where we were, since I didn't tell anyone…

He looked at her, with a serious expression. She could tell he was restraining his anger.

-So, I'm gonna ask you one time, Isabelle. -His voice was calm, but his gloomy face made her tremble in fear. -Did you share our location with someone tonight?

-No, Desmond. -She whispered.

-If I frisk through your backpack or if I search your body, am I gonna find a tracking device, Isabelle?

She gulped and shook her head.

-Tell me now, Belle, your life is at risk as much as mine. I won't be that mad if you tell me now.

-I swear, Desmond, I didn't share my location with anyone.

He nodded. There was another knock on the window and he made a signal with his hand.

-This car is armoured, so we are fairly protected against bullets. Don't get out of it, no matter what. -He muttered. -I can't say the same for if they take us out of the road in a collision. Don't panic, please, I'm gonna need to be able to pay attention on the road and on the cars. Can you do this for me?

-I'm already terrified. -She looked around and trembled. -But I'll try to keep my mouth shut.

He nodded. He took the radio and called for help, saying his car was being followed and giving them the description and the plates. After a few seconds, he received some answers about cars nearby that would come up for reinforcement.

-They are gonna block the street so no one can follow behind us. This will give us an advantage.

He sighed and started the car. She grabbed the seat as the car’s engine roared furiously and they turned violently in the opposite direction and ran faster than she thought it would be possible in so little amount of time. As soon as they passed through, a car moved and blocked the street. Not allowing the other cars to pass. She wondered if one of the blocked cars belonged to someone who was following them.

He drove dangerously, running way above the speed limit, surpassing other vehicles and not slowing down in any light, even if it was red. She felt the panic building up, but didn't say anything, just shut her eyes tightly and hoped it would end soon. After a while he slowed down and exhaled hard. They drove in silence, his forehead was damp with sweat.

-Your friend is a psychopath, did you know it? -He smirked. Then he squinted and frowned. -What the fuck?

Ahead of them one of the cars described on the note was blocking the way. He turned the wheel violently and changed direction.

-How the fuck did they know we were heading this way? -He glanced at her. -Belle, are you sure you don't have any tracking device on you or your backpack? What's inside it?

-I'm sure, Desmond! -She whined, holding on to her seat. -The only electronic device I had was my phone and you took it.

He grimaced and turned the wheel again. The tires squealed loudly as he changed direction and the engine roared violently as he accelerated. Soon they heard sirens and he sighed.

-Get your phone from my pocket. -He checked the mirror and pressed his lips. -Hurry, Belle, are you deaf?

She fumbled at his chest, looking for the phone, then took it out of his pocket.

-What are you waiting for? Turn it off! -He shouted at her as she looked at him, waiting for instructions. -Take the chip and the battery out and throw them both inside the plastic bag.

He looked at the mirror and stepped hard on the breaks. The car spinned and he managed to change to the opposite direction. The car that had been following them missed their rear by a few inches, trying to stop, but they were already at full speed entering a tunnel.

-I'm gonna take you to the precinct… Those assoles won't give up, even if they can't track us down anymore, I can't risk taking you to your apartment tonight.

She remembered of Chloe and grimaced. She couldn't spend the night at the precinct.

-What? -He looked at her briefly. -You look like you saw a ghost.

-There's something I need to tell you. I'm gonna need your help.

 

oh my godd!! the storyline is just so good!! Im already hooked :>> please update quicklyyy author :>>>

 

I am liking where this is going so far. . . The snusnu teaser really got me but now seeing some preamble. . .you definitely have the start of something potentially new and exciting here!! I cannot wait to read more!

 

This is amazinggggg !!!!
Where's the rest?

 

Made an account just so I could comment and let you know that this is so good! Please keep posting the chapters!! The snusnu scene on the UOT thread got me interested but the story line is so good! Thanks for sharing it

 

Omg you guys are so kind, I'm flattered

I'm fixing some parts to make it seem more realistic (I know it's not realistic but I get frustrated when I see something that is totally impossible to happen in a story that claims to happen in real world)
please, be patient, I'll post again soon
I already have a good amount of chapters ready, but the story isn't any close to finish, and I need to make sure I don't let loose ends in the middle of it so I don't repeat myself or trap myself in a situation that would ruin the story...
Ty for the feedbacks, you guys are awesome!

 

Chapter 9


They got to the precinct escorted by two police cars. Desmond pulled over in a restricted area of the underground parking garage. The parking lot was almost totally empty, as it was almost midnight.

He took a deep breath and leaned his head on the wheel for a moment. His forehead was glistening and his ears were red.

-What the fuck was he planning to do? -He mumbled under his breath. -He would kill me and get you, then what?

She stared at him, wiping her own sweat from her forehead.

-Are you sure Chloe is willing to cooperate? I don't wanna risk going to your school at 2 a.m. only to get caught in a trap and a crossfire.

-You can see the note… -She handed him the piece of paper. -She was willing to wait till Friday, then go to the police… And to me, but I swear, I don't know why me.

-Maybe she planned to tell you about what he did to you that night. -He nodded, examining the note. -Damn, Belle, I can't hold this information. We have to go and get her, we can't risk letting her flee.

-No, Desmond, please, don't send people to get her. Let me talk to her, she'll turn herself in. -She grabbed his arm and shook it. -Please, she must be very scared! We don't know if Daniel didn't do to her exactly what he did to me...

Desmond looked away, then sighed.

-You'll have to wait inside the car while I discuss it with the team and call the chief. I'm gonna lock you up, so don't waste your time trying to open any door. -He cursed a lot, then opened the door. -Is the air good? You can adjust it to your liking here, on that panel. Don't touch anything else. I'll come back soon.

She just nodded. She took the bottle of water from her backpack and took some gulps of it.

-What do you have there? -He frowned and got back to his seat, closing the door again.

She tried to keep it away from his reach, but his arms were longer than hers and he was quicker. He rummaged through her things, frowning deeper as he took things from inside. She blushed violently when he pulled out the panties and frowned.

-What the fuck were you planning? -He put her things back into the backpack and glared at her. -What are those things for?

She blushed and flinched.

-Are you deaf? -His dark eyes flared in anger. She trembled involuntarily.

-It was for Chloe… Just in case she refused to come with me… I was worried about her. -She looked down. -She's just a girl, Desmond.

He stared at her in silence, clenching his teeth. The muscles on his jaw protruded with the movements, in a menacing way. His voice came so loud and so suddenly that she was startled by it.

-Are you fucking stupid? I could arrest you for this, did you know? It's called accessory after the fact! -His face was red and he looked like he wanted to strangle her. -What's wrong with you? You could be condemned to pay the same sentence as her, only for being stupid!

He threw her backpack on the back seat then grabbed her shoulders and shook her vigorously.

-Stop doing reckless shit! -He shouted on her face. -For god sake, Isabelle! I'm working my ass, as an imbecile, to keep you safe, you asshole!

Her eyes were wide open, and her lips were trembling. He sighed and let go of her.

-Is there anything else I need to know? Are you planning to commit another crime tonight? -He sighed and snorted, trying to calm himself.

-I didn't know it was this serious. I'm sorry. -She whined. -I just didn't want to let her starve or feel cold…

-You'd give her resources to keep being a fugitive, you moron! Feeling cold or hungry are some of the motives someone decides to turn in! -He glared at her. -You're intelligent, Belle, there's no way you didn't think this shit through!

She hadn't thought it through. She had been feeling confused and had trouble concentrating since he took her pills away. She considered telling him that, but realized it would only get him angrier.

-I'm sorry. -She decided it was the only thing she could say to calm him. -You're right, it was a stupid idea. I won't do anything like that anymore, I swear.

-I'm committing a crime for you right now! I could lose my job for this if someone finds out, an FBI detective can't cover up this kind of shit and get scatheless! -He leaned on the wheel and bit his upper lip. -I should arrest you, right now.

-I didn't give it to her. -She whined. -I didn't help her.

-The evidence is very clear, Belle! Your intentions were clear! -He shouted again. -You even confessed it to me!

-I already said I'm sorry, what else do you want me to do? If you're gonna arrest me, do it already, stop threatening me! -She shouted back, pushing him by the chest with both hands.

He was surprised by her attitude. He stared at her taken aback. She crossed her arms and frowned.

-Don't be stupid, I won't arrest you. -He mumbled in a softer tone.

-Then stop saying you will. What's done is done, isn't it what you say? I can't go back in time and not pack those things. I thought I would be helping her get the courage to turn herself in. -She blushed, realizing it didn't make sense.

He reached out and took her face between his hands.

-Stop screwing yourself up for those bastards. -His eyes darted from one of her eyes to the other, back and forth. - They won't do the same for you, do you understand? They don't give a shit about you. They'll kill you, as they killed your boyfriend, in a blink of an eye, and pretend nothing happened on the next day. Stop being an idiot for people that aren't worth it.

He let go of her and looked away.

-She left you to die, did you know it? -He mumbled, not looking at her face. -When the cop approached, she ran away and left you in the middle of the road, unconscious.

She didn't know about it. She contemplated the information, trying to process what it meant.

-It was just for luck that you weren't run over. The cop didn't see your body, because he ran after her, finding it suspect that she ran away from him. The car stopped a few inches from your body. It was pure luck. -He let out a bitter laugh. -The driver was riding slower ‘cause he was texting. He only saw you cause he wasn't keeping his eyes on the road. Isn't it wonderful?

He rubbed his eyes and moaned.

-I'm so tired. I wish I could go back in time and ignore your existence. - He shook his head. -I wish I could just turn it off and not care about what happens to you. But I do care. Why do I still care if you yourself don't?

He looked into her eyes and she realized he was very worried for her. She smiled, shyly.

-I'm glad you still care… Please, don't give up on me. -She reached out and put her hand in his, with a light touch. -I'll try to deserve it.

He blinked at her words and smiled back, lifting only one side of his mouth. He stroked her head and got out of the car, slamming the door. She heard as the locks activated.

She looked around and tried to stay quiet as he instructed. She realized he took her phone with him. She realized he took her music away with her phone and pouted, wondering when he would give it back. She sang as low as she could manage and drummed the rhythm on her thighs. The minutes passed and she took her backpack and retrieved a vitamin bar. She was on the third bar when he got back into the car.

He eyed her, seeing the empty packages and frowned.

-Are you still hungry? -He laughed as she nodded. -If I hadn't spent most of the night with you, I'd say you were getting the munchies… Did you lie to me when you said you didn't do drugs?

She shook her head.

-You know pot is a drug too, right? That would explain a lot if you smoked… -He mocked her.

She just glared.

-Ok, here's what we're gonna do. I talked to the chief of counterterrorism, she agreed on keeping things low. We're going in my car and another special agent, a close friend of mine, will give us cover. Don't make that face. -He warned her as she was about to protest. - It's just in case she tries to run away again.

Belle didn't like it, but nodded.

-I'll give you fifteen minutes. If she doesn't come out and give herself in, I'll get in and take her. -He explained. -Do you understand it?

She nodded. She hoped fifteen minutes were enough. She started to run over in her mind all the phrases she had planned to say to Chloe to convince her to turn herself in.

He drove to the school and parked very close to the gym.

-I'm regretting agreeing to do this… -He scratched his chin. -If that's a trap… They could easily get you or kill you.

-It's not a trap, Desmond. She's not that smart. -She tried to act bold, but she was trembling.

-If anything happens, anything, get back here as fast as you can, ok? Run far from the door as soon as you leave so I can have a clear view to shoot. Don't react if they point a gun, though. Don't be reckless. -He instructed, then leaned over to rapture her gaze, with a stern look. -And Belle… Promise me you won't try to be a hero. Promise me you won't do anything stupid.

She stared at him and nodded, unable to look away. He was so close that she realized for the first time that his dark brown eyes had a golden greenish ring that splashed to the edge of the iris. It was a gorgeous detail that made his face even more beautiful.

-You have fifteen minutes, starting now. -His voice hit her like a whip.

She jumped from the car and ran to the door, startled.

As she got in, she had to crouch to avoid the tape that signaled people should keep out.

-Chloe? -She called her, timidly at first, then louder. -Chloe? I'm here to help you, please, come out.

But the place was dead silent. It was very dark and somber and she felt a shiver run up her spine. She approached the bleachers, and looked under it. There was no one there. She felt the sweat dripping on her forehead as she got sure it was a trap. Then her eyes, which were adapting to the darkness, spotted a piece of white paper, that almost seemed to shine among the darkened wood splinters.

She got out of the gym, with the piece of paper in her hand.

-That was way quicker than I expected… -Desmond lowered his gun as he saw her coming alone. -Isn't she inside?

-No, but she left a note. -She showed him.

-She's on the south wing… It's under construction, but it's been abandoned for a while now. -She watched him as he read the note over and over again.

-This looks like something Daniel would plan, not your dumb friend. -He shook his head. -I'm not letting you go there.

-Why? -She frowned.

-Because… -He grabbed her by the shoulder and forced her to get in the car. -Because they'll just kill you there and make it look like an accident.

He shut the door before she answered it.

She watched him as he sat by her side and explained to his partner what happened using the radio.

-Roger. -It was all that came from the other part.

They sat in silence, as Desmond thought over what he could do. He took his phone out and checked the time.

-Fuck… -He cursed.

-Let me go and try to convince her, Desmond. -She urged him. -I don't feel like it's a trap.

-It is a trap, Belle, and you're gonna get hurt. -He shook his head.

-I don't think Daniel has any idea of where she is… I hid the note from him.

-What if she left other notes in other places? Have you considered it? -He looked down on her, irritated. -What if Daniel came here, convinced her to follow him, put that note there where you or a cop could find it and planned a trap for whoever tried to come after her? Have you thought about this possibility?

She hadn't. He cursed again and pressed his lips.

-Wait here. -He got out of the car and opened the trunk. He came back after a while, wearing a bulletproof vest. He grabbed the radio and gave instructions.

He used a lot of terms she didn't understand, but she deduced that they were gonna get in the building and try to get whoever was inside by force. He allowed the other cop to open fire if the person tried to run or resisted. He also called for reinforcements.

She was terrified by the idea that Chloe could get shot or killed. She begged him to withdraw the permission to shoot but he ignored her, driving toward the south wing without even looking her way. When he signaled he was gonna lock her inside the car, she slipped through the open door on his side, sliding between the seat and his hip and ran.

-Isabelle, no! -Caught by surprise, as his eyes were occupied analyzing the structure, he tried to grab her, but she dove forward and slipped inside the building, disappearing in the dark. -Come back here! Isabelle!

She was trembling and panting, but didn't stop running. The note instructed her to come alone and head to the last floor of the east building of the south wing. She blinked in the dark, afraid of stumbling on something that could hurt her.

The construction site has been abandoned for months, as structure irregularities were found during the excavations. There was water mining from the ground, so the soil wasn't steady enough for the building.

She went up the stairs and looked around. She considered going back and begging Desmond to let her come along but she knew he would just drag her back to the car and lock her inside, after scolding her heavily. She was very scared. She moved her head frantically fearing at all times that someone would jump from the shadows.

When she got to the last floor, her legs were hurting and she was very tired. She realized that was the plan. If the person was tired, Chloe would be able to run from them, since she was probably well rested.

She looked around and decided to call her.

-Chloe? I'm here to help you, please, come out.

-What are you doing here? -Chloe's voice came from behind. She turned, startled.

Chloe was in the other building that was separated by a gap of only four or five feet's wide. Belle went to the edge and looked down. There was a square gap full of damp water far below. Belle realized they must have planned to put stairs there from other material, in order to connect the two buildings. The gap between them was so short, she felt the urge to jump through.

She looked at her side and saw there was a scaffolding connecting the buildings too. Chloe followed her gaze and shook her head.

-Don't try to get near me, I'll just run and you'll never see me again. -She said, in a calm voice. -Is Daniel with you?

-No. Chloe, you need to listen to me, Daniel might be involved in terrible things and be using us both to cover his tracks. -She said urgently, afraid Desmond would appear at any moment. -I can help you, you can get an agreement to tell the cops what you know and not go to jail. Let me help you, Chloe, please.

-You don't understand, Belle… The football team… It was just the tip of the iceberg. Oh, you have no idea… -Chloe shook her head and a tear ran down her face, followed by others. -I'm not turning myself in. If I do, they'll arrest me and torture me.

-Please Chloe. Desmond will help you, come with us.

-The hot detective? You brought him here? You betrayed me too, you bitch! -Her eyes went wild and she backed away.

-No, Chloe, listen! I'm trying to help you. -She shouted, almost losing her balance as she walked too close to the edge.

Then Chloe's eyes flew behind Belle's body and she saw Desmond appear by the stairs as she turned to check what the other was staring at. He had his gun out and pointed it in Chloe's direction.

-Move, Belle! -He shouted, trying to get a better angle as she stood between them.

-No. -She opened her arms in a protective gesture. -She's unarmed, you don't need to point a gun at her.

He grunted and walked in her direction, still pointing his gun. She heard Chloe moving away and looked back.

-No! Chloe, please, wait!

Chloe was backing away,half bent, trying to use her body as a shield. She looked down and took some steps back, to leap over the gap.

-Belle, no. Don't jump, it's too far! -Desmond urged her, running in her direction as he put his gun down. -No!

But she ran and took the leap. Chloe froze, watching her. It was farther than she had calculated and she fell on her stomach as her feet slipped on the edge dirty with cement.

-Are you crazy? -Chloe screamed as she helped her get to her feet.

She grabbed her friend's arm, decided not to let go, no matter what.

-Please, Chloe, don't go. Come with us, he's willing to help… -She brushed her scratched arm, grimacing. -Please, trust him. Trust me.

There was the sound of a car horn. Five times, then two. Trevor? Chloe looked in the direction of the sound and bit her lip.

-Belle, you know I love you, right? Let go of my arm, I don't wanna hurt you. -She said, very low.

Belle frowned. She let go of her arm out of pure shock at the cold tone in her voice.

-Please, I'm begging you, hold on tight and don't let go. Clasp at anything, just survive, please. -Chloe said in the same low tone.-I'll only do it if I have to.

Belle frowned, not understanding what she meant.

-Hey detective. -Chloe shouted at him, as he came closer to the edge. -Put your gun away. Throw it to the floor.

Belle turned to Desmond with a puzzled face. Then, she felt Chloe's hand grabbing her by her hair and a razor being pressed against her neck.

-I told you to put it on the floor, hottie. -She repeated, shielding her head behind Belle’s.

Desmond's face contorted and he looked straight into Belle's eyes as if saying he wanted to beat her to death.

-What makes you think I care enough for her to let you get away? -His voice was icy, his gun was pointed to Belle's head.

-I have nothing to lose anymore. -Chloe answered. -If you think you're gonna buy time so your friend can get me from behind, forget it. I smacked his head hard as he was coming up. Drop the gun or I'll take her with me to the stairs and cut her throat so you'll have to stop to help her. Put the fucking gun on the floor or I'll do it, now!

He grimaced and put the gun on the floor, slowly. His eyes were fixed on Belle's, as she cried softly. She wanted to say she was sorry, that she didn't think that could happen, but she was afraid that the razor would cut her if she moved her neck. She was even trying not to swallow.

-Kick it down. -Chloe's voice instructed.

-Look, let's talk… - Desmond tried to calm her.

The horn came again.

-Is that Daniel? -Desmond asked her. -He’ll go down, Chloe. Choose the right side, put that knife down, I can help you.

Belle felt a sting to her neck as the razor dug on her skin. She sobbed.

-No! -Desmond stepped forward and stopped less than one inch from the edge. -Please, don't! You don't wanna do it, she's your friend! She put her life at risk just to save you, more than once! You owe her!

-Fuck you, cop! -Chloe answered. -Kick it down or I'll slit her throat right here, right now!

-Will you let her go? Will you leave her alone, in one piece if I let you escape? -His voice was calm, but his hands were shaking slightly.

Chloe nodded.

He sighed and kicked the gun down through the gap, backing up a few steps. There was a deep silence and Chloe backed away, taking the razor away from Belle's throat.

What happened then was so fast that Belle's eyes didn't catch it all. Chloe started to turn to run away, but Desmond jumped over the gap and reached out to grab her. Chloe then shoved Belle with great strength toward the gap, kicking with one leg and pushing with both arms. The impact was so strong that Belle's body bumped on Desmond's leg, skidding through the dusty floor. Her body rolled and turned and she fell with her back to the gap, not being able to cling to the border.

As Belle fell, she looked to the sky, desperately trying to grab something, anything. She saw Desmond's arm coming after her, too late to hold her.

 

Chapter 10


Her foot hit the water first, then her elbows, then her legs, then her back, then her head. She gasped as the dirt water got into her eyes and her open mouth and she tried to sit up.

Desmond jumped to the scaffolding, sliding down on it to get to her as fast as he could. He kneeled beside her and helped her sit up, checking the back of her head, then running his fingers down her spine, desperately asking her if she could feel it.

-Can you move your arms? Can you move your legs? -He asked her, sighing in relief as he saw her moving her limbs.

-I think I broke my foot. -She moaned.

-If that's the only thing you broke, you're a very lucky bastard. -He answered holding her so tightly that she thought he would break her ribs. The bulletproof vest made his chest feel even harder. -I wanna skin you alive, you know?

-I'm sorry. -She whined, holding him as tight as she could with her sore arms.

-You could've died. -His trembling voice sounded weird to her ears.

-I know, I'm sorry. -She answered, the pain on her foot starting to get stronger by the second.

-You promised me you wouldn't do anything stupid! -He pressed her face against his neck until her cheek got numb. The rough fabric of the vest scratched her chin. -Are you crazy? Why did you jump there?

-You're hurting me. -She managed to say with her cold lips pressed against the skin of his neck.

He let go of her and she realized his eyes were moist. She couldn't tell if it was from sweat or tears.

-I wanna beat the shit out of you, Isabelle. -He said, looking into her eyes. -I swear to god, I'm hating you so much right now!

He pulled her against his chest again, this time softer, brushing her soaked hair with his fingers. She leaned her head on his chest and closed her eyes, enjoying his caressing.

-Don't you fucking dare to sleep! -He shook her.

-I won't, I don't feel sleepy, my foot is really hurting.

Desmond looked around and retrieved his gun, which was completely soaked, checking it and putting it back in the holster. He lifted her body from the murky water and tried to get a way of leaving the square ditch with her in his arms to access the closest floor. The walls were too high, and he sighed.

-Hold on tight to me. -He grabbed her arms and put them around his neck. -I know you won't be able to put strength to that leg, but try to wrap them around my waist…

-Like a baby monkey. -She murmured with a smile in her voice.

His brows furrowed a bit.

-Yes, like that… -He gave her a weird look, then chuckled as he realized why she said it. -Holly crap, how did you remember it? I was so embarrassed at the time for saying it…

-Why? It was cute… -She blushed and hid her face on his neck, doing as he instructed her.

Her leg throbbed and stinged painfully as she tried to put pressure with it to hold on to him, but she bit her lip and endured it.

He escalated the scaffolding carefully, sitting her on the edge of the floor before jumping to her side.

-Are you ok? -He checked her face, looking for signs of pain.

She just nodded. He lifted her in his arms and took her downstairs, heading out of the building. On the first floor they found his colleague sprawled on the ground. He sat her on the steps and leaned to check his friend's condition. He called for help on the radio and gave him first aid. He then bent over her ankle and checked it. It was very swollen, but he said nothing was broken, just sprained.

As the ambulance stopped and the paramedics helped reanimate his friend and checked on his condition, one paramedic checked on her and said she was ok. He cleaned her cuts and examined her ankle. He said she didn't seem to have a concussion but should be under observation for the next few hours. He also confirmed that her ankle was sprained and gave Desmond instructions on how to handle it so it could heal faster.

A female cop came by and talked to Desmond, taking notes and asking him questions. When they got into the car the sun was starting to rise on the horizon.

-I wanna beat the crap out of you, Belle. -He moaned, leaning his head against the wheel. -You're a motherfucking train wreck!

Belle looked at him and suppressed a smile as she remembered a song lyric and had to hold herself not to sing along.

-Really? Do you think it's funny? -He frowned at her.

-No. -She quickly covered her mouth, blushing.

-Why are you smiling, then?

-Nothing.

His face contorted in anger.

-It's a silly thing, you almost said a line of a song that I like. That's just it. -She quickly explained.

He frowned and opened his mouth.

-Is your friend ok? Will he be ok? -She asked him quickly, trying to change the direction of his thoughts.

-You should be worrying about yourself. -He cut her off, coldly, shaking his head. -I can't take you to your house. It's clear to me they want to kill you.

She nodded.

-We have two options. I can take you to the precinct and offer you to join the witness protection program. -He hesitated, looking like he wanted to say something but decided not to, then he went on. -If we do that, they'll take you away tonight. I probably won't be able to contact you anymore, but you'll be as safe as we can make it possible, with a new identity, in another state, probably.

Her brows furrowed at the idea of being sent away to live alone in a strange place.

-Or I can take you to my house and try to convince my boss to let you stay there till we can find out exactly what you know, that is so important that they are trying to kill you to keep you from telling us.

-Your place. -She didn't have to think much. Between never seeing him again, while being alone, and being under his protection full time, it wasn't a difficult decision to take. -Or a hospital.

-You don't need to go to a hospital. -He looked at her with a somber look. -Let's go to the precinct, so I can convince the chief to let me keep you in my house.

She was very tired and felt cold, but she nodded.

He stopped by a drive thru and got hamburgers and French fries for them. He ate his sandwich while driving, eating it so fast that she hadn't even eaten half of hers. He left her waiting, alone, inside the car. The heater was on its maximum capacity, but it wasn't enough to dry her clothes or make her feel less cold. She tried to distract herself to keep awake, humming “boyfriend” very low, laughing as she associated the lyrics with their situation.

As he came back into the car, it was night again and she was sleeping soundly. She woke up to the sound of him slamming the door shut.

-I told you not to sleep. -He scolded her as he got in.

-I'm not a robot, I'm almost dying from lack of sleep. -She protested. -How are you taking it that easily?

-If you wanted to sleep, you shouldn't have fallen from that height. -He glared at her. -I have adrenaline running through my veins enough to keep me awake for a week. I think you stole ten years of my lifetime last night.

She put her hand over his and squeezed it lightly.

-I'm really sorry. I just wanted to help. -She gave him a shy smile.

-The chief said she will support me… Let's go home and have some rest, ok? -He sighed, taking his hand away and putting it on the wheel. -Look…

She looked up, waiting. He sighed and averted his eyes.

-Do you really need to go to the hospital? -His eyes were begging her to say no.

She shook her head.

-Are you sure? Don't die on me, please.

-I'm ok now, I just need to rest. -Belle wondered why he was avoiding going to the hospital so much, but really didn't feel the need anymore.

Desmond stared at her face intently, pressing his lips. Then he nodded and started the car, maneuvering it with only one hand again.

-Are you in pain? -He asked her.

-My ankle is hurting a lot… And my back is a bit sore. But I can take it, it's nothing unbearable…

-Are you hungry?

-I'd eat, but I'm not dying from it too… -It was a lie. She was very hungry but she realized she was eating way more than she was used to. Concluding it was caused by the stress of the events, she decided to keep it under control, rationally.

The silence was uncomfortable but she could feel that Desmond was eager to fill it in order of keeping her awake.

-What song was it? -He asked, not taking his eyes from the road.

-I'm sorry? -She made a puzzled face.

-You said you remembered a song that you like when we got in the car… What song is that? -He took a glance at her but turned back to the road quickly.

-Ah… - She blushed, wishing he wouldn't make her tell him what the song was about. -It's a silly song, I just like to sing the songs of that singer…It isn't even her best song, really.

-Ok, but the song has a name, right? It's not usual to have a song that says “I wanna beat the crap out of you”. -He smirked. -Especially if it's sung by a woman.

-Ah, that wasn't the line. She says “I'm a motherfuckin’ trainwreck”. -She sang and blushed.

He laughed and shook his head.

-Well, that line isn't conventional, either.

She nodded and looked away, embarrassed that she just sang in front of him.

-What are you thinking about? -He asked.

How do you do that? She blushed violently.

-Just thinking about the lyrics. -She shrugged.

-Sing it. -He smiled. -We'll arrive in eight minutes, it's enough time for you to sing it all if you want to, I presume.

-I don't wanna sing it. -She backed away, terrified by the idea.

-Why is that? -He frowned. -You seem to enjoy singing…

-How do you know that? I've been wanting to ask you ever since that day at school. How do you know that I sing?

-I saw some videos of you singing. -He shrugged. -You seemed to be enjoying yourself and to be flattered that people around were enjoying it too. I thought you felt better when you sang, was I wrong?

-I like singing with my friends, or alone… But I'm embarrassed by the idea of singing in front of you. -She hid her face in her hair as she looked down. -What videos did you watch, anyway?

-One of your friends were stupid enough to try to invade an account of an acquaintance of mine… So I decided to get a warrant and do the same to him. -He smirked as if it was a joke. -He had a bunch of videos and pictures of you and your friends. There were a lot of videos of you at a karaoke or a party, singing.

-Oh… -She cringed at the idea of someone seeing those videos.

In one of them she was very drunk. It was the first and only time she tried to drink something alcoholic and she still remembered the uncomfortable sensations she had that night.

-Isn't it illegal? To watch those videos without my permission? -She frowned at him, feeling offended.

-I had a warrant. -He shrugged. -Don't worry, I didn't keep it or did something with it, I just rummaged through his stuff to find out what kind of things he'd been doing and bumped into you, it's no big deal.

She crossed her arms and looked down.

-What? -He turned on a corner and checked on her.

-Nothing.

-Tell me! -His tone indicated he was annoyed.

-It's unfair that you know a lot of things about me, without me having a say in it. -She pouted, frowning. -I feel kind of violated, like you're a stalker or something. It's unfair that you know those things about me but I know nothing about you!

He was speechless and just nodded.

-You reminded me of her. On the videos, I mean, that's why I spent my time watching it. I was just curious to understand what the resemblance was. -He said after a while. -You had nothing in common, to be honest, the more I know you, the less I understand why I felt like that. Maybe it's the way you laugh, it's kind of… No, I don't think that's it. But something made me wanna watch it, I wasn't willing to invade your privacy or stalk you.

She looked sideways to him, perplexed by his confession. She looked through the window and sighed, trying to suppress her unjustified jealousy toward him.

-Are we driving in circles? I have the impression we’ve just been here a moment ago. -She looked through the window.

-I'm checking if someone has been following us or if there is something strange in the surroundings. -He answered nonchalantly. -Don't worry, it's just for safety.

He then got into a garage that opened and closed in perfect synchrony with his maneuver.

-Welcome to my Batcave. -He mocked, opening the door for her and taking her into his arms.

-Oh! I knew I knew you from somewhere! So you're the real Batman! -She mocked him back.

He chuckled and unlocked the door, using his forearm to support her legs while he turned the key and hurrying to turn off the alarm. She pressed her face to his neck to assure him that she wasn't looking at his password, although she could guess it by the tone of the beeps.

-I never missed my home so much… -He sighed, sitting her in a chair by a dining table and going back to lock the door. She noticed he had three locks in it.

-Do you mind it if I sit a bit before tending to you? -He asked, taking a seat beside her as she shook her head.

He leaned on the table and rested his head on his arms, moaning.

-You can sleep in my bedroom, I'm gonna sleep on here, on the couch. -He explained.

-No, that doesn't make sense, I can sleep on the couch, I'm not gonna kick you out of your own bed! -She protested.

-It's alright, it's been years since the last time I slept there. But I keep it all clean, don't worry. -He shrugged. Then, seeing her curious expression, he added. -I don't like to sleep there, it brings back memories and I get up in a bad mood. So I just gave up. The couch is cozy, though, so I got used to it.

She suppressed her frown.

-Now you know something personal about me. Are you feeling better? -He winked and smiled.

She smiled back but looked down, feeling awkward.

-Desmond… -She murmured.

-Yes? -He answered, rubbing his hair and looking up.

-Why didn't you want to take me to the hospital? -She asked as she couldn't come to a good reason on her own.

He looked away and grimaced and she regretted asking it. She thought he wouldn't answer, but then he turned his chair in her direction, so he could face her.

-I don't like driving people to hospitals. -He said. -I know I drove you away from it, but I don't feel comfortable taking you to it…

He shook his head and snorted.

-I know it's stupid, but… -He snorted again and leaned on his knees, supporting his body on his elbows, holding his head down. -She was pregnant. I was driving her to the hospital for an appointment… A prenatal visit.

He shook his head and stayed like that for a few seconds. She didn't make a sound. In fact she stopped breathing.

-I know it's stupid, but I feel bad only by thinking of the idea of having to go through it again. -He shook his head again and rubbed his face, still not looking up. -I know it won't happen again, it's just… Bad. Does it make sense to you?

 

My friend you have such a great talent. You're blessed. Everything about this is great!! I started reading this yesterday after reading the smut scene which you posted under UOT. Ever since I started reading this I visited this page 5 to 6 times yesterday and today I was soooooo happy to see the update. Keep posting often cause I'm addicted to this. I feel like I might get over UOT cause the this story is quite intense and realistic compared to UOT. KEEP UP THIS WORK MATE

 

Side Notes from the Author:

Hi, here are some things I think I should explain to you, just in case you're liking or disliking it =.

-I wrote it mostly during a rough time, as I was really sick of Covid19 and couldn't stay out of bed for long periods, so, if you feel sometimes it's a bit depressing... Yeah, I was in a depressing state... Sorry for that =/ but I'm better now, so hopefully the story will follow my mood too and they'll have some moments of peace =P

-The first book is done and the second book is being written. It has explicit sex scenes, so I don't recommend it for underaged readers (not that the first one is light, but almost nothing is explicit, neither violence nor romance)

-I try to get it as realistic as possible in the fictional situation. That said, if you read something that you say: hold on, that's impossible to happen in real life, please, send me a message so I can analyze it and fix it. Really, it will help me and I take polite criticism very well (please don't send hate messages, though, it's not helpful and you might hurt/offend me or someone). If for any reason you have information about U.S. witness program, FBI or NYPD or United States laws in general, I'd welcome you to send me a message too.

-In case you're wondering: I'm a girl. And older than the main characters (I'll let you wonder about how old )

-English isn't my first language (I'm from Brazil, so my first language is Portuguese). If you find something that doesn't make sense/some typo, please warn me. I like to write in English to improve my vocabulary/practice. I'll appreciate it if you correct me(politely, please xD)

Characters profiles:

-Ryan Alexander Desmond :

Birthday: 6th November
The male character is inspired in Riftan from Under the Oak Tree, in case you noticed the resemblance/is needing a reference to imagine the physical appearance of him.
He's a bit shorter (He's 1,88 m / 6'2 ft, while Riftan is 1,96 m / 6'5ft )
He's more real life muscled xD a lot more realistic. Not a horse, just hot and strong. I don't have any idea of how the BMI would work for someone that fit, but I guess he weighs around 194lbs / 88kg (I won't talk about it, because I'm clueless about those things, I'm sedentary and I want to keep it like that.
His hair is straighter and neatly cut (but is always messy cause he has an habit of messing it up when he gets annoyed). I've created this picture of him (I'm not 100% satisfied with it), but to tell you the truth, if I had to choose someone in real life to play Ryan Desmond, it would be Jensen Ackless when he was younger (judge me, I know the description doesn't fit).

Spoiler: About Ryan A. Desmond:

He isn't an asshole. He's just a man that's been through difficult things in his life. Like any normal person he has his shades of personality, which means he can go all the way from kind and lovely to cruel and violent (like any human being if they believe their acts are justified or that their lives depend on it). He's just a bit more intense because of traumas.
In case you want to know more about him:
-He has OCD to some extent. I try to illustrate it with subtle signs, in the second book I'll try to explore it better.
-He suffers from PTSD, but he mostly uses it as an excuse (don't misinterpret it, people who suffers from it really suffer and should be respected, my character in specific doesn't want to "heal", because he came to this comfortable point where he can do what comes to his mind and not be judged for it as a "normal" person would). Samantha was a breakpoint in it. He started to get bad feelings toward her and couldn't see them as justified (even if they were totally normal), so he put the blame on himself and his inner hell. With Belle he's starting to learn to put it down and eventually not even feeling it.
-He's NOT perfectly honest. He does questionable things, some even illegal, and he doesn't feel any guilty. In a RPG aspect, I'd say he tilts between Lawful Bad and Chaotic Good.

Here's a simple Ryan's timeline:
Was homeschooled till 15y. He traveled a lot with his brother (before he joined the army), worldwide. In one of those travels he met his first love and obviously it ended bad (long distance relationships + juvenile love = WRONG)

15y to 16y - Decided to follow his brother's path and joined Military Academy school. He was bullied at first because of his appearance and arrogance, but he decided to become a bully of bullies (yeah, good Idea). He made more than a name for himself because of it, some good, some bad. I don't need to say that his appearance was a problem to the boys but not a real problem for the girls... He used it properly .
17y - Joined the Army and met some good friends from the Academy and some bad enemies too. Met young Belle (saved her life)

18y- Got through the snipper's selection and went to war (incidental, he went because the army needed people with his skills, he wouldn't be sent otherwise, because he was described as "undisciplined, boastful and obstinate" by his superiors. In other words, no one wanted him as a subordinate and he often was punished because of it. He learned the hard wat to pick his fights.)
20y- Got stabbed, spent some time in infirmary and lost his brother
20 to 21y- Was sent back to US, got into college (here his father used an influent friend to get him into college, because he was late to apply, hoping he would be still if he got anchored to the favor).
21y - joined NYPD, using the time of service in army. Captain Williams immediately got interested in him and pulled him close.
22y* almost 23y- Got promoted to sergeant. He was skilled for the job, but other people could get this promotion and were on the line years before he even joined the precinct. He got enemies because of it, but proved his value. Andrews introduced him to Samantha and set everything so they would get along. He put effort into takin care of Samantha, and ended up neglecting his own mental health. He pushed his family and friends away in hopes that it would help her with her declining psychological state, but she realized that her depression could be used as leverage to keep him beside her and did so. Seeking change in his life (not understanding that the problem was inside his house), he applied for FBI, hoping that spend more time working and less time fighting would make him feel better.
23y- Got into FBI and helped Riviera solve some personal problems, and, by doing that earned her full attention. She eventually used her influence to promote him so he could work under her, but expecting him to eventually turn into some sort of right hand.
24y- Got the case and 2 months later Samantha was killed.
25y- Skipped promotion and started chasing Daniel and Belle
26y- Met Belle again

-Isabelle Arwen Ross:

Birthday: 6th July
Belle is 5 ft tall (153 cm, to be more precise) and 112 lbs (about 50,8 kg).
In case you're wondering her other measures: Bust:36" (91 cm) , Waist: 20" (50,8 cm) and Hip: a little bit less than 39" (98 cm)
Hair chocolate brown, and it shines reddish in the sun, but Idk if I'll describe it at some point in te story.
Her eyes are brown. Plain brown. Like milk chocolate. (f*ck you society where characters have to have blue or green eyes to be gorgeous!)

Spoiler: About Isabelle A. Ross:

She's not weak minded. She's been drugged and victim of psychological and emotional abuse. Most people that go through abusive relationships (in her case by her aunt and best friend, but it can be by parents, husband/wife etc) simply can't see that the problem isn't exactly themselves, and most of them will blame themselves instead of the agressor. Belle was taught to fear her feelings instead of understanding them, but her parents gave her base to be smart and intelligent, so she can grow out of it, if she has help. Desmond provides it in his own tortuous way.

-I know some of you are here because of my snusnu scene on UOT, so, just for transparency:

Spoiler: About the Snusnu scene

The scene I posted on UOT forum is part of a chapter of book two. It takes part in book two, chapter 12 to 14. I just thought I should make it clear to avoid upsetting you. =. In case you're curious, it's this scene

-About the titles of the chapters: You can google it =P No, really, those songs aren't exactly an illustration of the chapter, but if you read the lyrics/hear the melody, you can grip what I meant. And they are awesome songs. My intention was to simulate Belle's playlist on shuffle.

 

I think this is a beautiful way to have boosted yourself while having been sick! We all need creative outlets to express our experiences, good, bad, and everything in between. You took a crappy situation/experience and made something wonderful from it!! I truly admire what you've done!! Don't let anyone tell you any different. Keep up the phenomenal work

 

Chapter 11


The silence sank between them like a heavy stone. Belle stared down at the top of his head, lost in the strange patterns of his straight dark hair. She wanted to run her fingers through it. If the urge was in order to comfort him or sparked by pure desire to touch him, she couldn't tell. She gulped loudly, then blushed as he looked up, worried.

-Are you in pain? Do you want some water?-He didn't wait for a reply, which came too late in the form of a shy nod. He hurried to get away from her like trying to escape the subject. She had only a glimpse of his eyes under the dim light of the table lamp, but she could tell they were welled up.

-Desmond?-She tried to call him, but the hoarse voice came out so low that she thought it would have been impossible to hear it even if he were in front of her, what more with him vanishing quickly through the kitchen door.

-Yes? - He came back instantly, leaning against the door with one arm, with an empty glass in the other hand.

Those sharp ears… How could you hear it? She considered saying, but got distracted by the sight of him leaning his forehead in the arm that was supporting his body. What are those thoughts? Control yourself, girl! She reprimanded herself, holding her breath as she blushed violently. Gladly, he didn't seem to notice or politely ignored it.

-Hm…- She mumbled, trying to remember what she planned to say. It seemed stupid now that she could see his impassive face, as if nothing had just happened. I'm sorry for reminding you of her? Kind of a jerk to say it. I wish it didn't happen? Oh yeah, genius! I wish you'll never ever go through something like this again? I want to be close to you and make you happy? What was she, a teenager in love? He already saw her as a kid with stupid bright eyes, that would be good enough to bury any chance of him seeing her as a woman instead of a girl.

-What?- He pressed her, a small wrinkle forming between his brows.-You may ask, and if I can, I'll provide it… You're not a prisoner here you know? Try to get comfortable.

-Well I… I'd really like to take a shower. - She improvised, only then realizing it was a genuine wish. She was filthy and very tired. Her leg was hurting because of the sprained ankle but her whole body was tense and throbbing because of the damp clothes. The smell wasn't exactly the same as sewage but it didn't smell anything near good either.

Desmond just stared at her for a few seconds, hesitating, then nodded and disappeared again through the door. She waited, wondering if she said something wrong. She tried to keep her face straight as he walked back into the room with a jar full of water and a couple of glasses. He took his time pouring it, first for her, then for himself, clearly avoiding looking at her face. He leaned back slowly in the chair, and sipped after sliding hers in her direction. All too slow, like buying time. She was staring distractedly at the bottom of her own glass, playing with the tiny bubbles on it, trying to guess what it was he was dwelling about.

-Ok… How… -He started, but sighed. -I should have taken you to a hospital. I'm sorry.

She just stared at him with a confused expression, as he rubbed his palm through his mouth, seeming annoyed or frustrated. She too felt annoyed at his tone and...Sad.

-How the fuck are you gonna take a shower on your own if you can't stand up? How are you gonna even take your pants off without hurting yourself even more?

Isabelle blinked. She didn't really think about it.

-I can sit and you know, pull it… And lean on the wall. -She started, a bit confused by the situation .-I can jump to the shower.

-Really? I would like to see you trying. Jump your way to the stairs like you said. - He smirked, crossing his arms in front of his puffed chest.

She blushed. It couldn't be that difficult. It's been what, fifteen or sixteen hours since she fell? Her body would be strong enough for her to jump a few meters in one foot. She got up and tried. Her muscles screamed in protest and her hand instinctively grabbed the back of the chair. He clicked his tongue. She didn't spare a look in his direction and tried to jump to the stairs. Her leg gave in to her own weight and she fell toward the table. He reached out, quickly putting his body between her and the table, grabbing her with one arm to steady her and the jar that she almost knocked down with his other hand.

-Damn, you're stubborn as a mule. - He groaned, forcing her to sit back in the chair. Then he dove into an impatient lecture.- You fell from a height even I would get hurt. And I know how to fall, you clearly don't! You could've died if you had hit your head there, do you realize it? You could have broken both your legs or your pelvis. You’re tremendously lucky you just sprained your ankle! It was pure luck, not skill. You could get paraplegic, just because of that one stupid decision...But was it enough to learn a lesson? No, now you wanna slam your head on my bathroom sink or something like that!

She glared at him as he scolded her again as if she were a stubborn child.

-So what? Am I gonna sleep with those filthy clothes and hair in your bed? Am I gonna stay like this for the whole time you keep me here?- Belle scolded back. She felt too tired to argue, though. - At least I'm trying to come up with a solution.

-Your solutions seem to always involve you getting hurt or almost dying. Even if I let you use the bathtub you can't get in or out on your own.

-So, what are you thinking about? Are you gonna strip me and bathe me? -She tried to sound mockingly, but her face went red and hot immediately, as he frowned deep at the suggestion. The atmosphere got heavy and dark.

-You know what? Fuck you. -He answered after a while with a snort, shaking his head slowly in reproach. -I'm gonna help you with your pants and put you inside the bathtub. When you're done, you'll sit on the side of the bathtub on your own, wrap yourself and call me. It's the best I can think about now.

-I beg your pardon? - She said in astonishment. He bent down and started to take off her wet sneakers and socks. She grimaced as he touched the sprained foot but he steadied her leg by the calf in a wieldy movement, so it almost didn't hurt. As he was taking off the other shoe she tried to avoid him. - I didn't say I agree with that idea. I won't let you take my pants off! Get off!

He looked up with an icy expression, grabbed her ankle roughly and took the shoe off and then the sock, never taking his eyes from hers. She tried to pull her leg away, but she couldn't even move it.

-Do you really believe you can compete with my physical strength? You're half my weight!- Belle couldn't tell if he was finding it funny or annoying, because his face went expressionless again. - I'm not gonna take it off here, we're gonna do it in the bathroom. Don't worry I won't touch you in an inappropriate way or whatever.

He added this last phrase with an offended tone, as if the idea was ridiculous. She blushed again.
They just stared at each other for a moment, as if challenging one another to say anything.

Desmond was the first to move. He leaned close and took her in his arms, walking up the stairs and turning into the second door to the left. He took away the arm from her back to turn on the light and she saw a beautifully adorned bathroom as she clung to his neck to keep her back straight. His fiancée must have chosen all the elements, from the delicate full length chiseled mirror beside the light marble countertop to the huge bathtub.

He sat her on the toilet lid and grabbed a red towel that was hanging on the wall, putting it over her lap.

-Ok, so you're gonna take it off from under you and I'm gonna try to get your foot off without hurting your ankle. See? I'm not a pedophile or abuser. -He rolled his eyes at her, clearly offended.

-You know I'm not a child anymore, right? - She almost cried out.

-Yeah, by a year or so. -He murmured, turning the hem of her pants up to make it easier to avoid touching her skin. - You must know it does not award you the title of an adult since you don't really act like one.

She gasped at his words, indignantly. Her eyes burned and he suddenly looked up as if daring her to cry.
She didn't budge, fixing her gaze in his eyes as if she could burn him down with just her stare. He was the first to break eye contact, pretending to be checking the hem again.

-I'm sorry, Belle, I didn't mean it. - Desmond murmured. -I didn't mean to underestimate you, either. I got angry when you implied I wanted to take advantage of you, that's all. I don't really think you're immature, I swear... I'm sorry.

-I’ve never said that. -She replied bluntly. -I just felt frustrated for not being able to do something simple on my own. I never said you wanted to grope me or force me to...

-Just shut up. Let's get this shit off of you and end this, I too am tired and need to take a shower, so… -He looked down again, clearly uncomfortable with her words. -Damn...My head is killing me.

She did as he said, and he never looked up, trying to avoid seeing something by accident. After taking her pants off, he carefully took off the improvised bandage and massaged her ankle slightly to check the swollenness. It was a very cute gesture, and she felt bad for questioning his intentions before.

-I’m almost twenty.-The sound of her own voice surprised her. She didn't mean to say it.

-And almost nineteen. -He mocked, without looking up. -I read your file, did you forget it? There's still five months to go.

-Still, not a child anymore. You're not that older either, what are you? Thirty something, at the most? -She replied.Taking his deep frown and silence as a reproach, she continued. -I know the panic attacks and the memory problems make me seem fragile and naive, but it could happen to anyone, even to you, you know? I've been through some heavy stuff in my life! You shouldn't judge me just for my mental…

-Cut the bullshit, Isabelle! -He interrupted her harshly. -I suffer from PTSD, ok? I've seen more people dying and losing their limbs than you talked to in your whole life. That's no excuse for being reckless. There's no excuse for what you did.

He finally looked up, avoiding her body and looking straight to her face.

-Look…- He sighed heavily, as if his patience had run out. -I'm not who you think I am. I'm not a hero and I can't help you. I'm all fucked up. I haven't slept properly for the past two years and I breathe, eat and drink this case everyday of my life for that long. There's no way I'm gonna let you ruin it for some kind of...

His face was red and his hands were slightly trembling as he threw her pants against the door. He shook his head and exhaled hard before continuing.

-You're not a woman, I'm not a man. You're a victim and a witness... - And a suspect, she read the unspoken words in his face that contorted in discomfort. Desmond sustained his gaze forcing her to look at him by grabbing her chin when she tried to look away. -And I'm the main investigator of this case. That's just it. That's all there is in our relationship, do you understand it?

Belle looked down, even though his hand still firmly held her jaw. He shook it lightly to force her to look at him again.

-Do you understand it? -He almost spelled each word. She felt a chill and got goosebumps from his firm, almost menacing tone.

A bunch of emotions burst inside her. She felt scared by his anger, ashamed by the rejection, sad for the gap she herself was creating between them just because she couldn't disguise her feelings toward him... Her eyes got red and wet. Desmond noticed it and lowered his voice, softening his face just a bit and letting go of her chin.

-There can't be another idea running through your head or mine, ok? Can you do this for me? Don't make things harder than they have to be…-His eyes assumed some kind of pleading shape.

She didn't answer and he didn't force it. He told her to wrap the towel around her waist and lifted her, sitting her at the bottom of the bathtub.

-I'm gonna fetch a clean towel and some clothes for you. They won't exactly fit you, but it will be better than nothing.

She wondered what clothes he would bring her. Goosebumps erupted from her whole body as she thought about the possibility of having to wear his fiancée's clothes. She was about to call him to tell him she didn't want to, when he got back with a small bench, a white fluffy towel and clothes. He put the bench beside the bathtub with the towel on top of it and unfolded the clothes for her to check them. She didn't have to ask, it was a long sleeved shirt and some kind of shorts that clearly belonged to him when he was younger and thinner.

-I'm sorry but you'll have to go without underwear for now. I don't think mine will suit you and I'm not willing to go through Samantha’s things now. -He said nonchalantly but she was dismayed by the thought of wearing another woman's underwear, especially in this case. He sniffed the clothes before putting them down on the marble countertop. -They are very old, but are the smallest I have… They are clean, don't worry. I have the maid wash everything in our room once per month… So, do you need something else?

He looked around clearly eager to get out.

-Hm, soap if you have one. -She looked around.

-Oh, yes, sorry. I never used this bathroom again ever since… - He crouched in front of the storage under the sink and took out a bunch of bottles. -You women use like a hundred things, I wonder why, in the end you smell good with only one thing, right? Wouldn't soap and shampoo be enough?

She never had him so talkative. It was funny to watch him mumbling with embarrassment for once. She almost felt avenged by all the times he made her feel stupid trying to fill the awkward silence. Almost. She felt guilty and sorry for him, for invading his sanctuary. After all, he slept on the couch to avoid using the bed she used to sleep in with him, he avoided this bathroom probably because it reminded him too much of her... How hurt was this man by those memories?

-Is this good enough? There's more there, but I have no idea if you're supposed to use them to bathe.- He brought eight different bottles and lined them up on a flat surface beside the bathtub. Just very expensive brands. She recognized shampoo, hair conditioner, body wash and body lotion among them and nodded.

-Do you happen to have a new toothbrush? And toothpaste if it's not too much to ask… -She had a bad taste in her mouth because of the blood and the long time without eating anything.

-Sure.-Desmond crouched again and rummaged inside a drawer, putting both items on top of the towel.-Something else?

-Hm…

-What? - He asked impatiently. -Stop acting shy, just say it.

-I just realized…-She grimaced, embarrassed.- I really need to pee.

He stared at her and blinked.

-Do it there, I don't mind. -He shrugged. -I'm not willing to take you out of there now.

-What? That's disgusting...

-The maid will clean it up on Thursday, anyway. And you just have to wash it afterwards before bathing. It's no big deal.-He started to turn toward the door. - Oh, and one thing: I swear to god, if I hear you trying to get to that toilet on your own I'm gonna get in here and spank you, get it?

She sank down and pointed back to the vessels and the bathtub trying to change the subject.

-Are you sure it's ok if I use it? - She looked back at his face, concerned.

-Sure. -He shrugged as if it didn't matter, though his eyes lingered on the bottles with some kind of painful longing. -It's not like she's gonna come back and claim them. If she does, I'm gonna owe you for the rest of my life.

He added with a smirk and turned away. But before closing the door he added.

-I'm just gonna go down and get my laptop. Try not to hurt yourself while I'm away. I'm gonna sit by the door. If some shit happens, call me. Don't try to do something stupid on your own.-She rolled her eyes, and he frowned in response. Then he instructed. -You know how to use it, right? Be careful not to burn your skin. The water will be very hot. You have to temper it with cold water from the tap to the right. Don't let it get too hot, for your pressure will drop and you may faint.

-Ok, dad. - She mocked.

-I'm serious. You lost some blood, you had a pretty bad fall and you're hurt. Besides, you look tired. Your foot won't get any better with hot water too, we should put some ice in it.- Desmond paused and sighed, looking straight into her eyes.-Look, I'm not used to taking care of people, I'm better at hurting them instead. I'm trusting you that you won't screw it up. Warm it just enough to feel comfortable. If you feel weird, just call me, ok? And don't fucking fall asleep inside the bathtub! You're too short, you might drown.

-Ok. -She felt bad that he didn't trust her even to take a shower on her own. Her head was throbbing a bit and her legs were numb from the cold. Still she wasn't stupid.

-I'm gonna check on you from time to time. Answer immediately. - He started to close the door and added. -I'm serious, if you don't want me to burst in, answer me when I call you, right?

She nodded. He closed the door and she heard his footsteps as he ran down the stairs. She took off the shirt and underwear. They weren't damp, but she had sweated a lot. She decided to wash them in the shower, just in case. She took off the red towel and turned the left tap. Warm water quickly turned into very hot water. It felt like heaven. She let the water run down her stiffened and sore muscles.