Discussion 108 Maidens of Destiny Translation.

Discussion in 'Novel Discussion' started by Tobi, Nov 10, 2018 at 2:38 AM.

  1. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    Am I the only one that notices the shit quality drop on the translation at 120+ chapters? When did it go awry? It has such a good streak of being a well-translated novel, but dropped off then?

    It's unfortunate because the novel is a detailed piece of work. Every sentence has a meaning, and when you butcher that sentence with atrocious grammar, it becomes really vomit inducing.

    I really want to slap the translator's head and make him hire an editor, or use Grammarly or that kind of program. I know I can't complain, but criticisms are a must. There are 300+ chapters now, and if every chapter makes me lose my brain cells, then I have to say that it's unfortunate that such a good novel is currently being translated by a translator like that. EDITOR EDITOR EDITOR.

    No offense to the translator though, if you guys see this, then I'd recommend going back and fixing every chapter. It's simple, just copy and paste on Grammarly or a similar program, and then try and fix manually. For a good novel, that's the basic thing to do. Or at least that's what I'd like you to do, but if you don't want to then meh.
     
  2. DiabolicGod

    DiabolicGod [Chaotic Organizor] [Enemy of Productivity]

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    Copy what the translator releases and paste it in the program yourself
    Then you can read a slightly better version (y)
     
  3. Akemua

    Akemua [Code of Conduct]

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    Talks shit about the translator and wishes to slap him on the head... But, intends no offense. Nani the fuck? No, sir, your attitude is vomit inducing. If it's so goddam bad to you, then take your own advice. Copy the text into Grammarly and edit it while you read.
     
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  4. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    Again, no offense to the translator. My brain is programmed to be rough, also that's a saying. And I should've then become the editor right? It's really nothing, the TL'er are translating the novel and I'm criticizing the fact that it's a bumpy translation. THE NOVEL IS GOOD, but the translation fell off halfway. What the fuck even happened? Did they change the translator or something? Also, what's up with the fact that I can't give advice on using Grammarly?

    The novel raws are good, the translation is lacking. It's such a good novel, and I don't want the translator to go full deep without really editing the bad parts away. And I don't know whether or not the translator is planning to edit the entire novel at the end.
    Meh anway. One of my personal pet peeves is that they use "Tsundere" and not "Mischievious-Stubborn-Naughty" It's just, why?
     
  5. Sabruness

    Sabruness [Goddess Shigure-Sama Religion's Founder-Pope]

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    Because it's easier? and "Tsundere", one word, sounds better than using "Mischievious-Stubborn-Naughty" which is three words in a horrible sounding mish mash which conveys meaning in a very shitty way
     
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  6. Akemua

    Akemua [Code of Conduct]

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    I mean, that wasn't my point. I didn't even say you can't give advice about Grammarly or that the novel is bad (no idea why you caped that up, but okay). Just that if it's that bad of a tl/grammar instead of acting the way you are, to do it yourself. By all means, give the recommendation to the actual Tl'er.

    Dude, I am an asshole. I have a bad mouth and more times than not I let my emotions get the better of me. But, I have yet to actually want to slap a decent person because he didn't do a job properly (the way I would want) when I'm not even paying him. That's just plain ridiculous. If that's a saying, it's not very common since I have not once in my entire life heard that.

    Ya, his quality has gone down. But, I'm not gonna sit here and bitch about it. He has a life you know? He works and goes to school. He does this as a hobby, not a job. He is not required to fulfill your sense of entitlement... Look, it's not that you made the post or that you want to have a conversation about. That is completely cool. It's how you did it. It really does just come off as you being entitled but not willing to actually help the situation at all. Even the no offense to the translator bit. It just sounds disingenuous because of your attitude about it. But again, these are just words of text, for all I know you aren't actually trying to be mean.

    As for the tsundere, It's an archetype and for the majority of people reading these novels, they can easily picture her and how she is acting because of that.

    Anyway, by all means, go to his site and shoot him a comment or email to see if he could look into getting an editor or running a program to help him. I appreciate quality work as well, I just also am not paying for it and so I have no right to complain.
     
  7. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    Again, I never directly insulted him. I'm just saying that he really needs to find an editor or use some kind of common sense to put together an eligible sentence. It's really not that hard. I'm just criticizing his translation. And also, I'll stay true to my statement that bad grammars are vomit inducing( Zhu Xian's early translation is like this... and that translator is a special one), I don't necessarily need perfect grammar but there's A LOT, I mean A LOT, of sentences that completely went outside common sense. The least you can do when translating is make the translation a bit better (I've always said this to my translator friends which they agree) or else we can just use MTL. Especially, when you're doing 200+ chapters of it and post it publically.

    Again, due respect to the translator, he's a good guy. I've seen him responding to a lot of questions and comments, and I've had a question answered as well. He's a student and all, exam season is currently open, so big luck to him. I just wanted to get this off my chest, because the novel is beautiful and I simply love it.
     
  8. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    Are you misunderstanding something? I'm just saying that he can use a lot of different words to define her, the words I put out is just an example.
     
  9. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    I'm probs gonna contact the Translator, he's active here. It's just that...he's done 280 something chapters of it and a lot of the translation are iffy and quite frankly on the bad side of it. If @Schwarze_Kreuz wanted to edit them all, I would suggest asking the Forumers to re-read through the novel and point out each mistake. https://thesuniscold.translatednove...r-157-yin-yang-lovemaking-powder#fnref-7604-4 This chapter for example... It's...ahem indeed, the whole chapter is a mess.

    I personally can edit because I'm free literally 24/7 only reading novels and re-reading them, but I would be sacrificing valuable reading time for those time to edit. You could just give me permission to edit because I'm currently re-reading it.
     
  10. Akemua

    Akemua [Code of Conduct]

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    Meh, at least you can reply back in a decent manner. As I said, I understand and it sucks that the quality has dropped, but complaining about isn't gonna change anything. The best you can do is what I suggested, actually talk to him about it. Comparatively speaking, it's not horrible and I can put up with it because he's a good guy and just does this for a hobby. Even his worst edits are better than some people on QI that get paid to do it. Idk, I'm not so anal about this stuff anymore. I don't read as much as I used to so I don't get triggered when it's not the best quality. Just some advice, if you know the other party is doing their best, just be chill about and open a conversation, not rant about it. But, more power to ya. Cheers.
     
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  11. Schwarze_Kreuz

    Schwarze_Kreuz Well-Known Member

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    So, uh, what exactly are my grammar problems? An example, please, and no, an entire chapter does not count. I have seen your request, reviewed a few chapters, and I don't really see an issue here. Kinda stumped atm.
     
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  12. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    Kreuz, you're a great guy man. But damn do I have to say "WHAT?" do you not see the abundance of grammar mistakes?

    -This naked request of Chai Ling’s truly made Su Xing open wide his eyes ->"This naked request of Chai Ling's made Su Xing's eyes wide open (Simple fix, not really a problem)

    -“Could it be you feel I am that sort of person who enjoys sensual pleasures while leaving his own women to go risk life and limb?” Su Xing furrowed his brow. -> "Could you be thinking that I am the sort of person that enjoys sensual pleasures while leaving his own women to go and risk their lives and limbs?" Su Xing furrowed his brows

    Here's the biggest uhoh in that chapter
    "we wonder how is your sword dance?1 Care for a bout?”" -> "We wonder, how does your sword dance? Care for a bout?"
    At this point, I really wondered how you... possibly messed this up. You put an explanation there! You didn't notice it?

    Anyway, there's a lot, I don't want to sit here and go through every single chapter. Here's what my friend and I have come to term with "You translate it too literally, there's no flow behind the sentences, there's also a lot of misplaced words."

    Again, no offense, but this is an editor's job which I guess you don't have. There's a lot of rogue translators that translate and edit as well, I don't see why you can't take a moment and re-read the chapter to make sure everything makes sense and flow well.
     
  13. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    It's great tho that you interact with the community. It makes it possible to reach you and point out mistakes. I'm currently finishing this run of the novel, probably will re-read it in a week. At that time I'll be sure to remind you of every possible flow details o7
     
  14. Schwarze_Kreuz

    Schwarze_Kreuz Well-Known Member

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    TBH, some of those really are mistakes. Others, like the sword dance passage, are not. The underlying issue, however, is that I don't know how to identify underlying grammar issues. In spite of a college education, the main focus of which was emphasized on theses, analyses and conclusions, grammar was de-emphasized in favor of critical thinking; so long as the point could be articulated in some way, shape or form, Oxford comma present or lacking thereof, professors and TA's were perfectly content to let grammar mistakes slide. Writings for literature and writings for scientific or analytical study evidently have different rigors with which grammar is scrutinized. Suffice it to say, I was never alerted to any issues with my grammar, nor was I informed that I could use a refresher for such. In fact, the last grammar class I ever had was over a decade ago when I was in sixth grade. Obviously, a lot has deteriorated since then.

    I recognize there are tools out there to help with grammatical errors and proofreading, but it is to my slight regret that I must say grammar is not a central concern of mine for now. Note that in my translations, I take the most literal, word for word approach to translating, with the exception being figurative language, for which I will first attempt to find an English equivalent. So long as the spirit of the text is preserved, grammatical error present or not, I am content with presenting the chapter. In the future, when I don't have to worry about professional examinations, I most probably will go back and release second editions. For now, Grammarly will have to wait.

    That does remind me, you aren't the first to scrutinize my mistakes, and I do welcome all feedback. Just know I probably will not be able to make all revisions in a timely manner. I truly appreciate your concern for accuracy :)
     
  15. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    It's good my guy, It's just that I would appreciate that you try to make the chapters at least flow a bit better. The difference between Chinese Grammar and English Grammar are huge, so I usually ask new translators to try and use their understanding of English to try and make the sentences appropriate to a degree. A lot of big translators usually try and change the words in the chapters to best suit the situations and flow of the chapters.

    If you finish translating the novel, I'd appreciate you to find an editor or editors to fix the previous chapters. It's sad to not go 100% throttle on the translation if you do plan on finishing the novel.
     
  16. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    You don't really need any program or anything. Just use your basic understanding from your novel readings and common sense to try and piece together a coherence sentence. It's 100% better than MTL this one.

    This situation reminds me again of the Zhu Xian incident, the translator there completely butchered the novel, and then another translator comes in and translates it similar to you. He's also the same as you, easy to access and talk to (again for the 3rd time).
     
  17. aru

    aru Well-Known Member

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    I thought there was something truly outrageous going on for a translation to be "vomit inducing," but it turns out it was just a non-native speaker with an over-inflated view of their English.

    The original did not have an error.

    "Risk life and limb" is an idiomatic expression. While I guess you can have furrowed brows (as in eyebrows), a furrowed brow is a creased forehead and people only have one forehead.

    "Sword dance" is a noun.

    The examples provided weren't particularly indicative of grammar issues. While you may have issues with your text, the OP shouldn't be the one correcting you considering his issues with grammar.
     
  18. Schwarze_Kreuz

    Schwarze_Kreuz Well-Known Member

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    You wouldn't happen to be referring to me right, cuz I'm English native. American, to be precise.
     
  19. aru

    aru Well-Known Member

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    No, I was referring to the person complaining about you.
     
  20. Tobi

    Tobi Well-Known Member

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    Oh wow, an English native speaker that thinks their fucking English is the best. I'm sorry but these things have their difference.
    First of all the original really didn't have an error, but it's weird "This naked request of Chai Ling’s truly made Su Xing open wide his eyes"
    Open wide his eyes? Okay there Super Overlord of English Language. The shit doesn't make sense even if you talk normally.

    I get the "Risk life and limb" I was pretty wrong about it, but you can also see it from my perspective. It's weird without knowing the fucking idiom. The furrowed brow is interesting because I've always thought that a furrowed brow is talking about the eyebrows.

    And the sword dance can also be taken from my perspective. There's also the fact that I quickly went through the chapter to find at least 4 "mistakes" to post here. Wrong with half but understandable as well.

    -Here are some sentences that I really go "What?"
    -"Although This Palace is Liangshan’s richest person, neither is This Palace a philanthropist.” Cha Ling’s smile slightly carried ridicule
    =Why is neither used here?
    -"This Palace shall again give you a chance. If you take the Knowledge Star’s virgin part, this Red Ink Iron Certificate shall be lent to you. Even if this Knowledge Star lost her virginity, the effects are not great.”"
    =Again, this is too literal, there's no flow. I would change a few like "If you take the Knowledge Star's virginity" and "Even if the Knowledge Star lost her virginity, the effects won't be too severe"
    -“Do you really think yourself very rich, that money can be exceedingly high?”
    ="Do you really think of yourself as very rich, and that your money is in abundance? -> or maybe that your money is a lot? (much simpler)
    There are others, but I'm currently too busy reading.

    I'll say it again, literal translation SUCKS DICK in a novel or a story form of literature. There's a lot of translated chapters that started out with people that know how novels flow works and translate it properly but then to drop it and get picked up by a translator that uses MTL or knows Chinese but translate them shits too literally.

    Again, no offense to the translator, I'll still read it. It's just that an editor is good to have, there's a lot of freelancers in the community. That's why I really want to know whether or not the translator will finish the novel and then edit it completely.