A few quickies for the night ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

A boy was born of an Indian, Chinese, Irish, and Italian grandmother

Spoiler: ...

They couldn't settle on a name, until it hit them!
They named him Ravi O. Lee

My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot.

Spoiler: ...

It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.

Spoiler: Kinda offensive...please dont kill me...

I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!"

Spoiler: ...

Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

Spoiler: last one...kinda of a mini paragraph

A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"

 

First joke: no idea what the joke is
Second: that makes no sense, i cant understand the joke and appreciate how funny it is.
Fourth: this one is so old
Third: i plead the fifth

 

hmm I still remember the last one
as for other

 

I hope this is a joke. In my country the official from the town hall could ask the Prosecutor to take you to court and get the name changed.

 

Spoiler: First Joke

Ravi O. Lee
Ravi - Indian; O. - Irish; Lee - Chinese; Ravioli - Italian

Spoiler: Second Joke

Play on words

 

Look at thread: no idea whats happening

Look at URL: what? that happens!? The face!!! But I can't copy and paste

 

I liked the fourth one. The first three made me groan.

 

What did the ocean say to the island?

Spoiler: Answer

Nothing it just waved

How long does it take a gymnast to get to class?

Spoiler: Answer

A split second

What did the 0 say to the 8?

Spoiler: Answer

Nice belt

What did one strand of DNA say to the other?

Spoiler: Answer

Do these 'genes' make me look fat

I'm bored and wanted to torture you with dad jokes (I've got to practice for when i'm an actual dad)

 

Ah, I realized the O was meant to be Irish but I thought it had to be O' something. That's interesting. I might start learning Irish now.

 

(I could be wrong and it was never passed) it's possible here to refuses to sign off on a birth certificate with names that are likely to cause a child harm.

 

Hopefully most countries have some kind of procedure against this. :|

 

I think most do

 

Q is O with its dick out.

 

I wish they did that here. When I was a kid I knew a pair of twins named Orongelo and Yelogelo, a.k.a Orange jello and Yellow jello . . .

 

Were they made of slime? Did the parents work at a jelly factory?

 

No, and no. From what I know their mom craved jello when she was pregnant and they couldn't think of names . . .

 

German roadway construction contractor invites his Czech friend of same profession to his villa.
He shows of his large villa and collection of ten expensive cars.
After he is done, Czech asks him: "So, where did you get money for this?"
German contractor points at the nearby highway and says: "See that highway? It was supposed to be 10 cm wider."
Czech smiles and invites German to his own villa.

Next week, German visits his Czech friend and is surprised, as Czech's villa is at least two times larger than his own. Czech contractor then shows him his collection of fifty expensive cars.
Filled with envy, German contractor asks: "Where did you get money for this?"

Spoiler

Czech points at nearby field and says: "Do you see that highway?"
"What highway?"
"Exactly!"

 

They should be able to engage in legal procedures to get their names changed.

 

What an old joke....

 

New to me...