Discussion A Shameless Plug

Discussion in 'Novel General' started by Evil_Ginger, Nov 5, 2018.

?

Why aren't there any potatoes!?

  1. Because author forgot.

    1 vote(s)
    6.3%
  2. Because author is a little beech tree.

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  3. Perhaps there are no more potatoes. Good.

    2 vote(s)
    12.5%
  4. It's okay. We can just spam the word potato in the comments. Unlimited potatoes.

    13 vote(s)
    81.3%
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  1. Evil_Ginger

    Evil_Ginger 『Lawful Neutral』『Cheese Master』『安德鲁』

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    Wassup? Wanna waste about an hour of your time? Of the finite lifespan you carry?

    If so, great! Go read my recently released short story, Little Baron & Big General over on RRL!

    I don't even care if you call me out on my terrible and unprofessional attitude! Just go read my stinkin' novel!

    Ahem. Now that that is out of the way, I actually look forward to any and all criticism. However, if you can, I would like to know what you enjoyed or appreciated or found 'good.' Something that you saw and went, "oh, that was good."

    I don't want to be too depressed, you know? I am a simple person who likes being praised. But whatever. Here is the link.

    https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/21445/little-baron-big-general
     
  2. SoulZer0

    SoulZer0 Heaven Refining

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    Ads are getting smarter.
     
  3. Silver Snake

    Silver Snake Magician of NUF|Show-off|Awkward|Genius

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    Is this allowed?
     
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  4. PedoBear Version 2.0

    PedoBear Version 2.0 「 Lvl. 69 Legendary Pantsu Hunter !」

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    "So you're a masochist..."
     
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  5. Evil_Ginger

    Evil_Ginger 『Lawful Neutral』『Cheese Master』『安德鲁』

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    Yes because this is a discussion page for the novel, Little Baron & Big General

    :blobowoevil:
     
  6. Ddraig

    Ddraig Frostfire Dragon|Retired lurker|FFF|Loved by RNG

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    It's called shameless advertisement and it is okay for most part, aint that right @LysUltima -chan?
     
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  7. PedoBear Version 2.0

    PedoBear Version 2.0 「 Lvl. 69 Legendary Pantsu Hunter !」

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    Ok so let me be honest with you.
    The way you describe things are terrible, your english... Nvm.
    Well its not like im good at it too but still,it just hurt to read those stiff sentences
     
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  8. Evil_Ginger

    Evil_Ginger 『Lawful Neutral』『Cheese Master』『安德鲁』

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    :blobfearful:
    Uh, of course it's fine!:blobsweat_2:
    No need to be like that!:blobsweat:
    Let's just discuss my novel!:blobtired:

    Which one in particular?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 5, 2018
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  9. Silver Snake

    Silver Snake Magician of NUF|Show-off|Awkward|Genius

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    I also feel you should be more specific, I mean, if you're going to criticize then give good reason.
     
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  10. ChickenBakuba

    ChickenBakuba Well-Known Member

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    Actually pretty good

    Edit: the writing is excellent and the story is nice
     
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  11. PedoBear Version 2.0

    PedoBear Version 2.0 「 Lvl. 69 Legendary Pantsu Hunter !」

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    Well for example here
    "It won’t matter once I leave"
    I think it would sound better if you make it like this
    "It doesn't matter once i leave anyway"
    But hey im also bad at this kind of thing too,its just that it doesn't click when i read yours
     
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  12. Suijin

    Suijin Blood God [Medic]

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    no
     
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  13. Evil_Ginger

    Evil_Ginger 『Lawful Neutral』『Cheese Master』『安德鲁』

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    Ah, I thought it was the way my sentences were structured. In this particular case, Ivan doesn't care so his dialogue is lazy and not quite mannered.

    'Won't' is faster to say than 'doesn't'
     
  14. Evil_Ginger

    Evil_Ginger 『Lawful Neutral』『Cheese Master』『安德鲁』

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    :blobshh:
     
  15. PedoBear Version 2.0

    PedoBear Version 2.0 「 Lvl. 69 Legendary Pantsu Hunter !」

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    Ohh but what does this sentence mean?

    “You also don’t own this place. I do.”
     
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  16. ChickenBakuba

    ChickenBakuba Well-Known Member

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    Original dialogue is definitely better imo
     
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  17. Tilgarial

    Tilgarial [Chaos Tiger] [Paradox] [ded][Houseplant]

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    Haha.
    I havent read that particular story yet(!), but while we are at this, there is this (possibly) nice and for now still fairly short story on RR called A Tiger's Journey. For me, its definitely worth taking note of.
    Link: https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/20805/a-tigers-journey
     
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  18. Evil_Ginger

    Evil_Ginger 『Lawful Neutral』『Cheese Master』『安德鲁』

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    :blobamused:
     
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  19. ChickenBakuba

    ChickenBakuba Well-Known Member

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    please number your chapters
     
  20. Evil_Ginger

    Evil_Ginger 『Lawful Neutral』『Cheese Master』『安德鲁』

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    In response to Ivan saying 'get out of my house,' the Duke reveals he is the owner of the house. He also mentions that he originally wanted to take in Ivan but can't due to his position. I was making it known that the two have a history and that, at least at some point, Ivan relied on Dalton.
     
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