It's former name was: "The spiky cactus wants to give you a gentle hug"トゲトゲじかけのサボテンは優しく君をハグしたい Name:Blue us embrace a miracle 青い僕らは奇跡を抱きしめる Raw Link:link NU Link:none Description: Even if it has a lot of spikes. Please don't judge them by their appearance. I think some people have invisible spikes. They protect you or attack you. You may find yourself crying over those spikes. I want to help them when they are in pain. The cactus, full of spikes, becomes the main character in the shadows. It will save you. You are not alone. Let's get started. The cactus magic show is about to begin. I'll tell you the secret after everything is over. Spoiler ch1 When the alarm clock goes off and I lazily open my eyes, half asleep, it's the beginning of the worst day of my life. It was at this moment that I was most unhappy, as I shook off the visions of dreams that lingered on my mind and forced myself to sit up. The sharp aggression inside me had increased. Dragging it out and coming face to face with my father would be nothing but the worst. I tried to ignore him and went into the bathroom to try to get through it. "Hey, where's your morning greeting, can't you at least say 'good morning'? It started again. My father started his preemptive attack. "Shut up, we see each other every day, why don't we keep it simple? Frustrated, I closed the bathroom door roughly. While I was doing my business, my father was mumbling his complaints across the door. Sure enough, when I came out of the bathroom, my father was waiting for me as if he had been expecting me. It would have backfired on me to be so persistent in the morning, but my father is a stubborn man, so even if it offended me, he would continue his discipline. "Yes, yes, good morning, good morning. I responded as if I were swearing out of desperation. My father didn't seem to like that either. So what should I do? My father would do something like this in the morning to upset me, and I'd be in a bad mood for the rest of the day. He gets upset over the slightest thing, and for no reason at all, he just clicks his tongue and takes it out on me wherever he can. My bad moods are exposed at all times. It takes me a long time to get into a good mood, and I have to spend all my time with a grumpy, pouting face. I'm always mopey and selfish. i'm difficult. There was a selfishness that I could not control. I wanted to be left alone. Interference, especially from my parents, irritated my feelings. I didn't know what I didn't like about myself, and the closer I got to them, the more I felt that way and the sooner I got pissed off. I was aware that I was blessed in every way, and that I should be grateful for that, but I had this twisted idea that it was a sin to be honest with myself. You want to make yourself look big, and you get cocky because you want to show off. I was still at the age when i couldn't control myself. I would rebel against my parents and then swear even more at them for making me feel bad. I think we all get frustrated when we don't get what we want, or when things don't go our way and we become harsh with our words. That's why they revert even more. The parents can't stand to see it, so they interfere more and more, and when they can't accept it honestly, they get angry and rebel. My mother is careful as if she were touching a tumor, and my father is always trying to correct my mistakes by being righteous and arrogant, which is even more annoying. I know what I'm doing, but I'm too emotional to admit that I'm wrong, so I expose the sharp part of my body. The mind is like a knife that gets carried away. I didn't even try to see the true heart of things and people, and took it for granted that it was so, and that it was normal. I'm still immature, and I can't help but be stubborn. I was just a clown who hadn't yet realized what it was like. So one day, when I found out that I was hated at school, I was hit with a shock that felt like the sky was falling, and a despair that was a final blow at the same time. I saw with my own eyes, in slow motion, the timelessness of the moment when I was falling apart. The worst moment of my life had arrived. I was so devastated that I couldn't live anymore, and there I was, weak, cowardly, and stunned. The friend I thought I was getting along with was a spy who was watching me to find out what I was up to. I didn't know that, but I had been so forgiving that I had talked about everything. Sometimes, I could tell him things that I shouldn't have been, but I only shared them with him because I thought he felt the same way. But that was a trap. He took the story and turned it into something worse, and told the whole class. He was more popular than I was, and everyone took his word for it, even if it was laced with lies. The betrayal and the people around him who are swallowed up by it and sympathize with it. The stream is marginalized as an object of disgust, and the negative chains are wrapped around it for no reason. I was stuck, shivering in pain with frustration, and frightened every day. Perhaps it was just the beginning, but the negative chain of events continued from there, and those who looked at me as if they were looking at something dirty made me feel bad all the time. No matter how hard I struggled, I couldn't get any better, my luck was bad. My heart is scarred. I have scars in my heart and thorns in my body to protect myself as best I can. Even though I knew it was no good as a weapon, I was frustrated and tried to make a pointless stand against it. I was struggling with the ups and downs, barely able to get my face out of the water to catch my breath. Maybe there was a faint hope that I could still make it. If I had to say that I deserved it, that would be it, but in my heart I wanted someone to help me. I wanted someone to reach out to me. In the midst of my despair, I was trying to hold on to something. That's why, at that moment, on the road where cars were coming and going, I instinctively jumped into the air. There was desperation, a small hope to do something about it, and a reckless act of impulsive body movement. It was the worst possible combination of everything. And sure enough, I was run over by a car. The person who ran me over may have been annoyed and angry, because he probably didn't expect me to run into him. In this case, is there some kind of penalty for the person who hit me? If so, I'm sorry. The time it took for the car to run over me was so slow that I was able to think about it, and the surroundings mysteriously turned into slow motion, and I could see many things spinning around and around. I wondered if this was the right time to do it, or if it was fate. It was the best I could do for my tormentors. But without a suicide note, the school would never admit that there was any abuse. At the very least, I should have left something like that somewhere. On what day and month did he abuse me like this? On what day, he humiliated me like this, and I came to be hated and abused by everyone. On what day of the month, he and also they took advantage and began to abuse me. I should have recorded it somewhere in my textbook or notebook. For times like this. It's too late now, but at this point, there was nothing I could do. Out of nowhere, some kind of will came into my body as a sensation. It was like being enveloped by the light of God, as they say. I wondered where I was now. I might as well just disappear without waking up. Maybe it would be better if I didn't exist at all. I'm still feeling desperate. But in my heart, I was crying out of regret and loneliness. At times like this, I conveniently think about my father and mother. I'm sure they'll be the saddest people in the world when I'm gone. After all, I am their only daughter. I wandered aimlessly, feeling as if I were crossing the river of the three paths that I had heard about. I feel like I'm losing myself, like I'm in the middle of life and death, suspended in a state of incomprehensible blankness. It is often said that at times like this, people replay a lifetime's worth of memories like a running lantern. A lifetime? It was far too short a time to be described as a lifetime. Something was whimpering weakly at my side. As I listened to the voice, images emerged in my mind and gradually became clearer. It was a very strange and ridiculous image that had no meaning at all. But I had also become separated from the container called myself, and I didn't know who I was anymore. As the individual I am faded away, the images that played were incomprehensible. Someone was dressed strangely and singing. Why It Should Get Picked Up: Winner of スタ文大賞3 Because of being hated in school the main charecter attempts suicide and when she's in coma she starts having a dream about two people. Spoiler her parents One is a boy named Yuto who is bullied at school, whose parents fight all the time when he goes home, and who lives a boring life with nothing going right. From the point of view of Yuto, who is poor, has a discordant family, and is not doing well in school, Haba(the other person in mc's dream) appears to be a happy young lady who grew up without any worries, receiving a lot of love from her warm family. However, in reality, she is dealing with a serious problem, and yet she is still living her life without despair. That year's contest, the third in the series, was based on the theme of "Hope and Empathy," and they were also looking for works that fit their brand concept of "This one book will change me." The winner announser's opinion: Spoiler If I had to describe the message given by this work with its unique title in one word, it would be "courage to live." While tracing the difficulties of living and salvation in the human world, the confusion of adolescent minds, and youthful complications, a ray of hope can be seen: ...Rather than bemoaning the unfortunate events and circumstances, the story teaches us how important it is to change our perspective and look forward to life. The heaviness of the story can be a bit frustrating, especially in the first half, but the themes and motifs are well established throughout the work, making it a very worthwhile read. What I would also like to mention is the originality and the fun of the devices. While staying close to the reality that we all have in our daily lives, there are many key words such as cactus and magic tricks that are released with a unique sensibility, and at the end of the story, the reader is left wondering, "Oh! So that's what it's about! And the shocking development at the end that makes you realize, "Oh! It was a sensory experience with a refreshing aftertaste and a heartwarming message.