Corrupt a Wish

granted, but you would get banned for double posting

I wish for a new pet

 

Hookworms take a liking to you.

I wish humanity evolved positively.

 

granted, but in doing so humanity never discovered technology due to not needing it

I wish for a stork

 

A dead stork, you mean?

I wish help came when needed.

 

? i don't get it

granted, but it was the help you deserved, not needed

I wish for all pain in the world to end

 

All the pain worldwide is equally distributed to anyone who comes into contact with you.

I wish dreams came true.

 

​

Granted, all dreams came true, but all the nightmares came to you.

I wish to live leisurely life.

 

granted, but its as a pet for some alien

I wish for the world to be united

 

Granted.
We’re united in our hatred for you.

I wish everyone had pancakes.

 

granted, but they go to war with each other to hoard the most pancakes

I wish for something nice to happen

 

Granted.
Something nice happened to everyone but you.

I wish for three more wishes.

 

Granted but they all have to be about cats.

I wish for snow.

 

Granted, you get @Osamaru's yellow snow.
I wish to no longer be ill.

X

 

Granted, but now everyone else is.
I wish for a Cookie. I could really do with a Cookie.

 

Granted.
You get a Brown cookie filled with Green things - you seem to become paralysed and unable to control your bowels for a few hours.
'-'

I wish for a merry Christmas!
\o/

X

 

Granted but it's a day late.

I wish for happiness!

 

Granted, you become happy as you eat @Osamaru's yellow snow.

I wish to be confident irl.
X

 

Granted but it only last for 24 hours

I wish to be able to speak 10 different languages

 

Granted, but you keep replying using the wrong language during conversations

I wish I could watch a meteor shower.

 

Granted but you get hit.

I wish for knowing what to wish.