Corrupt a Wish

granted but every other person is better at everything you do

I wish to have a deep soothing voice

 

Granted but everyone faints whenever they hear your voice.

I wish to be free

 

granted, you were bought for the low low price of free, now get to work

I wish for a relaxing break

 

granted, but only for your students

I wish for a new moon

 

granted but only once every month

I wish for a way to be immortal

 

granted, but your body would be drugged and dissect for researched to find out how you ended up like that

I wish for a cure all pill

 

granted but you misplaced the pill while someone suddenly called you for an emergency and you just have to answer for some plot based reason

I wish more people are more objective

 

granted, you get isekaied over to a game/fantasy world where all the world is made up of generic NPCs

I wish to whose best girl?

 

granted, you realized every girl is best girls aside from yandere girls

I wish for a stab proof vest

 

granted, you would be murder uses a chainsaw though

I wish more history to be known

 

granted but humanity was turned to stone, practically resetting whatever civilization was there

I wish for faster updates

 

granted, but it was a false alarm, due to the poster re uploading old chapters

I wish to be able to survive on nothing

 

Granted, you can survive on top of nothing... Until you fall down to your death that is, but you'll have a few seconds of life to enjoy when you jump from the airplane~

I wish for a magical wand~

 

granted, it has the amazing ability to turn into a flower, and can't be changed back

I wish for a first aid kit

 

granted, here's a a pistol and a single bullet, when your mission fails, that's your first aid...

I wish for a wittier comeback

 

granted, but the humor is lost to everyone but you

I wish for my one true love

 

Granted; it's a potato. Unfortunately, it's kidnapped by a mighty fast food joint with suspicious golden arches that shreds your true love and serves them as food for the starving masses.

I wish for a snack; a tasty, healthy snack.

 

granted, but a seagull from overhead snatches it away before you even take a bite

I wish for more computer knowledge

 

Granted. You and your computer get to know each other really well. Maybe a little too well. Are you sure you're the original @wonderer ?

I wish I could remember my dreams.

 

granted, you remember the face of a eldritch horror that was long banished to some far corner of your mind, and a once implausible conspiracy that you had dismissed as some weird dream

I wish for proof of god