Discussion How satisfied are you?

Discussion in 'Novel General' started by Okuri Ookami, Jan 1, 2016.

?

Which style do you like best?

Poll closed Jan 1, 2017.
  1. Journal style (1st style)

    1 vote(s)
    8.3%
  2. HP & TC stlye (2nd style)

    2 vote(s)
    16.7%
  3. They're both bad!

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  4. I have no preferences!

    5 vote(s)
    41.7%
  5. I like them both.

    2 vote(s)
    16.7%
  6. None, they are equally bad.

    2 vote(s)
    16.7%
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  1. Okuri Ookami

    Okuri Ookami 'Chi Chi Chi' calls the Sparrow

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    Are you satisfied by the new trend of e-book authors, web novelist, and bloggers (that post web stories) writing their books in journal format? How about a narrative that catches even the littlest details simultaneously describing everything but never in any detail or in to much detail that you loose track of what they've said before or how you feel about it? Or to boot the classic protag that says everything but misses a lot or even more?

    I was replying to an author's request for an editor and I got carried away teasing them for a bit at first then after getting serious and asking some questions and trying to give an helpful idea. He didn't get what I was going for through a rough explanation (really was rough) so I made up a little story passage to explain my concept of how story flow should actually be presented in a good book that immerses the reader.

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    I gave an example of what I thought a journal or standard for todays web-novels looked like:
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    The night sky cast the world into a deep darkness that made Dave feel a sense of dread in his heart as he slowly traversed the sea of flora that was the "Widows Morn" forest. A deep penetrating howl suddenly pierces the night sky as Dave and Kyle make their way past the territory of the Tarmeir! It was sending the intruders a warning to "stay away this is my land".
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Then I gave an example of what I thought a decent or good story should progress like:
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Making their way through the depths of "Widows Morn", anxious Dave places his hands on his hilt as he and Kyle walk two man abreast through the shadowed forest.

    Dave: "Do we have to leave tonight of all nights? There isn't a spec of light in the sky, even the moon and stars seem to hide from such an ominous day as today."

    Kyle: "...It's not like I want to go either but it's the only way to get to ...."

    *Awoo~~* A piercing howl cuts through the nights sky!

    Kyle: "Shit!!!"

    Dave: "What is that!"

    Kyle:"..."

    Dave:"..."

    Both settle down to listen to the howling once more, but the sound never came.

    Dave: "Kyle what is that, talk to me!"

    Kyle: "I-I think, that mmi-ight have beeb~" he stutters then bites his tongue. Collecting himself he once again tries to speak.

    Kyle: "I think, that might have been a Tarmeir!"

    Dave: "!!"

    Kyle: It was most likely a calling sign as it howled only once, we should hurry and leave its territory as fast as we can!
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Now this is just something I'd made up on the spot so don't judge me to hard!!

    But I was wondering which style do you prefer? The style I tried to write in was one I think I got from the old Harry Potter and Tom Clancy novels. I want the characters to be the ones interacting with their world but far enough away (not so in-depth that they know or have to say everything) that you can get an over view of the situation and not be stuck in one mind frame. An "outsider looking in" should still be an outsider right? To me the journal style is without though, more conversational than immersive and often not / too challenging... I either know where their going or I'm lost entirely, if the author tries to go for mystery.
     
  2. Okuri Ookami

    Okuri Ookami 'Chi Chi Chi' calls the Sparrow

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    Uhh~ this wound up being a very long post...

    Sorry bout that!
     
  3. little king

    little king Ruler of Sloth [Neko-form]

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    It doesnt matter for me Sir as long as it doesnt hurt my eyes...
     
    Last edited: Jan 1, 2016
  4. Thunder Dragon

    Thunder Dragon [Supreme Being][Dragon of Thunder Bone Body]

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    seconded
     
  5. Dreken01

    Dreken01 Well-Known Member

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    Thirded
     
  6. Azure

    Azure The True Blue Sky

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    Personally, I prefer the former. I was into fantasy books before I got into webnovels so I'm much more accustomed to that sort of style. As for the second, I liked Harry Potter a lot and enjoyed how it was written, but I don't think you really captured the way HP was written very well. Your example read more like Kumo Desu Ga, Nani Ka? than a book.
     
  7. the_cheater17

    the_cheater17 17 is not my age

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    Fourthed.
     
  8. pristineallyn

    pristineallyn Well-Known Member

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    Fifthed
     
  9. little king

    little king Ruler of Sloth [Neko-form]

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    (ノ ゚Д゚)ノ ==== ┻━━┻
     
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  10. Jaded

    Jaded Majoring in Erology

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    That's not journal format. Journal format would be novels like Re:Monster, where the story is told from a first persons point of view. The first one you posted is a story being told from a third person's point of view.

    The second one you wrote seems more similar to a play script. I agree with @Azure , it doesn't seem similar to a Harry Potter novel.

    I don't think there's any better style on how to write a story. Depends on how comfortable the author is in writing in a particular style.
     
  11. Okuri Ookami

    Okuri Ookami 'Chi Chi Chi' calls the Sparrow

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    Well I did just come up with it... I'm no author (T_T), what is this Kumo Desu Ga, Nani Ka? book...

    You people are breaking my heart!
     
  12. heartantares

    heartantares One Who Provides Uselessly Detailed Information

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    im the type to like long blocks of logical explanations only when needed(usually in the beginning when world building or introducing systems). otherwise the 2nd is useful in creating story mood and character depth. letting one see into how characters feel without having to state so and so feel sad/happy/stupid/however they feel.

    for the most part i think its more a matter of use either where ever when ever is appropriate.

    ps. Kumo Desu Ga, Nani Ka? is a novel, you can seach it on this site

    also when i read journal format.... i keep thinking diaries >_<
     
  13. Jaded

    Jaded Majoring in Erology

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    It's a Japanese WN where the MC is reincarnated into a spider. A good read. Everything gets explained at some point in the story, as to how she has been reincarnated, why did she become a spider of all things etc.
    LOL!!!
     
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  14. qzty

    qzty From normal-fag to F5-er Jack of Spades

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    For me the synopsis should interest me.
    If it is interesting I don't care about style, I will give it a try
     
  15. Senros

    Senros Well-Known Member

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    Mhmm for me both are good. It's just a different way of writting. Just like some like to read the books of some authors but not others, you prefer what I would call more adventure like story. For some reason it kind of reminds me of LOTR (don't judge me if it's not quite similar as I read those books around 7 years ago). The second one is sure more fantasy like and idk forever alone? I guess... The first one for me is good for a while, but then it gets too dense and hard to read, but that depends on how its written. There are books that are written that way that are easy to read, but there are some that fry your brain after a few pages... The second one is easier to read as you can imagine quite a vivid scene of what is happening. Idk the second one I imagine it in a theater/movie way and the first one just like a normal fantasy story. Both have pros and cons, but as long as the writter doesn't suck or makes the story feel too dense I would be ok with either way if writting.
     
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  16. Ogami-kun

    Ogami-kun 『Blue Shadow ensnaring demons』『FA sect disciple』

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    Damn, I thought that this was a post like the ones in the novel where is asked:" are you satisfied with your life?" and boom trasported to another world ;.;
     
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  17. Okuri Ookami

    Okuri Ookami 'Chi Chi Chi' calls the Sparrow

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    How come I feel your the only one who understands me :( though I rage hate LOTR :eek:o_O:confused::mad: (The 4 stages of me watching LOTR's first movie so many years ago)

    If I could right something like that I'd have done it for myself before anyone else lol

    :cool:: And monopolize the next world all for myself babes included!!

    :oops:: If I could get up the courage to talk to one
     
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