Short Story I found this really old short story I wrote, and I decided to add on a bit to it.

Discussion in 'Community Creations' started by Donutmindme, Mar 20, 2018.

  1. Donutmindme

    Donutmindme [dounut][Zodiac:Golden snake][PROcracinator]

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    My name is Hyacinths. I am an orphan with seven siblings. I just arrived from a theme park, that my friend invited me to. I slowly opened the door, but when I did there was complete silence. I creeped around for a while, called out my siblings, but no one responded. The stench of blood reeked very badly. I turned around and saw a mysterious black shadow creeping towards me, splashing in the blood. First, I saw my big brother Alex on the floor of the entrance. He was always a reliable brother. Next, I saw Mira who was a year younger than Alex. She was lying one the living room. I'll absolutely miss her and her cooking. I can see her protecting a little body. It belonged to Dan who loved helping Mira around the orphanage. I turn around to the stairs and Catherine and Ben’s bodies were on the staircase. Sure she was an annoying little girl who thinks she is diva, and Ben was not all bad either, but was still an annoying little brat. Next, I see the twins Mari and May. The twins lay on the couch with their video games controllers in hand. I still can't tell who was who. Then I stumbled into the kitchen, trying not to make much noise. I trip and fall on Aki. I hate him so much, but he is still my brother.

    The sound of creaking wood made me think just how old this place was. The creaking was getting louder, and louder. I just lay there traumatized. It was hard processing what was going on. Every time the water drops from the kitchen faucet. She was getting closer. It was that woman who was friends with mother Fern. Mother gave us shelter in this orphanage. The woman's footsteps kept coming closer, with each creeks she makes as she steps on the old Wooden floor. I close my eyes and lay dead. I really don’t want her to come here. I've always had a inkling suspicion about her. It was weird. I knew that she was pretending to be mother Fern's friend. It was clear now that she had ill intentions.

    “I didn't want all this to be real. I want my family back." I thought to myself as the woman came close. Her foot was right behind me. My body started to heat up, getting stressed and anxious. It was only a minute before she moved her foot and proceed to leave. However that one minute was like dread, and was really agonizing, and like an eternity. It felt like I was spending a long time in a very short time. All of this doesn't make sense. Why would she kill them? What benefit would there be for her?? This is freaking orphanage, there's nothing here. Well there used to be, until you killed them all.

    As all these thoughts were going through my head the lady finally left. I proceeded by going to the shower and cool off. As well as cleaning myself, and my thoughts. After I did that I headed to the one place that was left untouched. It was my hiding place. It’s where I went every time something happened. Then Aki would always come find me, and tell me that everyone is worried especially mother Fern. I call this place a my safe box. I go here every time to get rid of the boo boos I get in life, and from life.

    I cuddle up in my warm clean blankets in my Safe Box. I just lay there for hours. I go over every detail of my life thinking why did it have to come to this. I go over all my shared memories of everyone.

    "I miss them all deeply." Tears ran down my face as I whispered this.

    "It's not like anyone would hear this.. sniff..."

    "Someone..sniff....p-please help me." I cried, but of course no one could hear me. As time passed by I cried myself to sleep. I then had a dream of being back in my normal life.

    EDIT: I fixed stuff. I might continue this. I have so many ideas for this. There’s more I want to add with this. I can come back later add stuff later.
     
    Last edited: Mar 20, 2018
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  2. SmilePlease

    SmilePlease New Member

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    No offence @Dountmindme but someone needs to beta this. Other than that, it's good for a short story.
     
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  3. Omnicast

    Omnicast Well-Known Member

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    This is... 2spookyforme. :sweating_profusely:
     
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  4. SmilePlease

    SmilePlease New Member

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    So..... After she fell asleep, the woman came back and found her, right? And then she killed Hyacinths while she was asleep right?? And then Hyacinths stayed in her dream forever RIGHT???
     
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  5. Donutmindme

    Donutmindme [dounut][Zodiac:Golden snake][PROcracinator]

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    Wait what did you mean by this?
     
  6. SmilePlease

    SmilePlease New Member

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    That story needs a grammar check. And someone has to do it.
     
  7. Donutmindme

    Donutmindme [dounut][Zodiac:Golden snake][PROcracinator]

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    Oh.
     
  8. SmilePlease

    SmilePlease New Member

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    So.... are you gonna do it?
     
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  9. Donutmindme

    Donutmindme [dounut][Zodiac:Golden snake][PROcracinator]

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    Yeah I said I was gunnna fix stuff when I wake up.
     
  10. SmilePlease

    SmilePlease New Member

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    Ok. Don't mind me then :D
     
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