Novel My Job in Another World is Cheater

Discussion in 'Community Fictions' started by Wahyu123, Jul 26, 2018.

  1. Wahyu123

    Wahyu123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    24
    Reading List:
    Link
    Hello, this is the first web novel I've ever made. Don't know if it's good enough to fill your thirsts for good story. But, do give it a try and tell me your impressions.

    Synopsis:

    Sawada Saito, a 24 years old NEET college student who still haven't work on his last project to graduate from his university suddenly found himself in a completely white room after waking up from his sleep.
    After finding out he's actually died because of God's mistake, God told him that he will be reincarnated in another world just like in novel and be given one cheat ability.

    [Is there any restriction in making the cheat ability?] (Saito)

    [None.](God)

    What kind of cheat will he make? And what will he do for his new life in another world?

    Table of Contents:
    Prologue
    Chapter 1
    Chapter 2
    Chapter 3
    Chapter 4
    Chapter 5
     
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2018
    kenar and Cosmic_ like this.
  2. Wahyu123

    Wahyu123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    24
    Reading List:
    Link
    Prologue

    Hello, my name is Sawada Saito. I’m a 24 years old NEET college student who’s too lazy to work on his last project to graduate from my goddamn university. You might think “since you’re already one step away from graduating then quickly finish your project”. Well, I want to, but I just don’t have the motivation and the capability for it. Anyway, rather than talking about that depressing problem, I rather talk about my current problem.

    Right now, I am in a completely white room all by myself after I wake up from my sleep and in front of me there is a window just like in RPG games. I’ve tried to read what was written in it. And apparently, God has just made a mistake and put my name in His people’s time to die list and because He’s so busy with his work he’s decided to contact me this way. Since I am a fanatic of fantasy genre light novels, God has finally decided to grand my wish to lead a new life in another world and give me one cheat ability. After that, I was asked what kind of cheat ability I want. Since, I was asked to make it I might as well ask.

    [Is there any restriction in making the cheat ability?] (Saito)

    It feels a little weird asking that even though right now I’m in this room all by myself, but this is important after all. Then the window says

    [None.](God)

    Since He says that, I make my cheat ability as ridiculous as possible so I can enjoy my new life.

    [Then, I want an ability to make cheats.](Saito)

    After that, the window says.

    [Granted.](God)

    After I’ve decided the cheat that I want to make, my body suddenly shining brightly for a while then the window in front of me shows the cheat ability I’ve just made.

    [[Create Cheat]] Lv.EX
    This ability let the user to create a cheat skill using cheat points as the cost. Current cheat point:1.


    Alright, this should be good enough.

    After that, the window shows me something different again. This time, the window show an interface just like when you make a character in games. Well, seeing the face of the character in the window is my face, obviously this means I can customize my appearance. And, it’s quite detailed too, as in “that” kind of detail.

    Well, I guess I’ll just make my body thinner then do this and this. Done. After that, the window change interface and ask me the classic ‘Are you sure?’.

    Well, since I’m done, I can only choose ‘Yes’ of course. After that I suddenly lost my consciousness. Again.
     
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2018
    Lucid and GameMaster like this.
  3. polarbot

    polarbot Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2016
    Messages:
    292
    Likes Received:
    142
    Reading List:
    Link
  4. Cosmic_

    Cosmic_ [Novel Addict] [Lazy Writer] [Meh Editor]

    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2016
    Messages:
    2,680
    Likes Received:
    2,388
    Reading List:
    Link
    Maybe a Cheat Sharing Cheat for the harem?
    Also plural "cheat."
     
  5. Warlock Of The Void

    Warlock Of The Void Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2017
    Messages:
    717
    Likes Received:
    506
    Reading List:
    Link
    So far so good.
    By the way why not try RoyalRoad for writing ur story , it much more convenient to read on proper site than on forum
     
  6. Kid Kayor

    Kid Kayor The Cake is Fake, The Pie is a Lie

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2017
    Messages:
    112
    Likes Received:
    67
    Reading List:
    Link
    How bout a cheat point generating cheat skill
     
    Cosmic_ likes this.
  7. Cosmic_

    Cosmic_ [Novel Addict] [Lazy Writer] [Meh Editor]

    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2016
    Messages:
    2,680
    Likes Received:
    2,388
    Reading List:
    Link
    Yeah, there's a larger audience there. Tho you'd probably get more detailed, longer, and active criticism and advice on NUF.

    Also I'd feel that the "Hello, my name is..." intro is really bad...

    Edit: Also if you're thinking of uploading on RRL, contact/PM @RRL Vocaloid to get your fiction approved so you'd get to get past the plagiarism check and ownership verification progress faster.
     
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2018
  8. ChickenBakuba

    ChickenBakuba Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2017
    Messages:
    411
    Likes Received:
    345
    Reading List:
    Link
    Wow this is so generic it feels like an actual translated isekai
     
  9. Way

    Way Crimeless Raubritter

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2016
    Messages:
    232
    Likes Received:
    5,941
    Reading List:
    Link
    I mean, nothing much yet, but this actually reads like something translated +1
     
  10. Wahyu123

    Wahyu123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    24
    Reading List:
    Link
    I've decided I will stick on NUF more after reading what you've said. Since I like it more if I can be more interactive with the readers which are you guys.

    And as for the intro, sorry 'bout that. Since I really like 4th dimension joke, I try to make it like that. Maybe I got too many influence from Dragon Ball Super subconciously since I made this chapter when Dragon Ball Super still haven't come to an end yet. I mean, you know how they always start the episode by previewing the previous episode. Goku will always says, "Hello, I'm Goku".
    :blobcheeky::blobcheeky::blobcheeky:
     
  11. Wahyu123

    Wahyu123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    24
    Reading List:
    Link
    I have that kind of idea, but for now, I'm still considering it.
     
  12. Wahyu123

    Wahyu123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    24
    Reading List:
    Link
    Sorry about that, I thought that's the right way to write it.
     
  13. Cosmic_

    Cosmic_ [Novel Addict] [Lazy Writer] [Meh Editor]

    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2016
    Messages:
    2,680
    Likes Received:
    2,388
    Reading List:
    Link
    Yeah, it could be too much of a Cheat costing a lot of points.
     
  14. AndrewReads

    AndrewReads Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 11, 2016
    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    10
    Reading List:
    Link
    How about Quests / mission to complete for chest points otherwise it may be boring to ez get stuff? Mission may be like how to cheat money from people , tests, exams etc.
     
  15. Wahyu123

    Wahyu123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    24
    Reading List:
    Link
    Okay, I’ll try to think about it. Thank you for the idea though
     
  16. Wahyu123

    Wahyu123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    24
    Reading List:
    Link
    Chapter 1-First Thing To Do In Another World

    [U...ugh...](Saito)

    I finally regained my consciousness. I try to look around me and what do you know. It's an open field to the front, an open field to the left, an open field to right, and behind me..., another open field.

    [(sigh)... God, at the very least you should've make it near town. If it's like this it'll be bad if I end up going to a dangerous place instead of a town.]

    I give a long sigh. Well, since it's no use to dwell on it too much, I've decided to do something more important right now.

    [Status](Saito)

    After I said the cliche word, a window appeared in front of me with this contents.

    -----------------------------------------
    Name: Sawada Saito
    Age: 24 years old
    Gender: Male
    Race: Human
    Level: 1
    Job: Cheater
    HP:25/25
    MP:10/10
    STR:4
    VIT:2
    DEX:2
    AGI:4
    INT:7
    WIS:6
    LUC:0

    Cheat Points(CP):11
    Skill Points(SP):10
    Skill:
    Cheat:
    Create Cheat LV.EX
    Passive:
    Hand to Hand Combat LV.1
    Intuition LV.1
    Cooking LV.1
    Mathematics LV.2
    Chemistry LV.1
    Spirit Language LV.3
    Ancient Language LV.1
    Magic Programming LV.2
    Singing LV.1
    Music Instrument LV.1

    Title:
    The One Who Cheats
    Another World Traveller
    -------------------------------------------

    [........What... should I even say about this crappy status?](Saito)

    Wait, now that I think about it, this status might seem low, but maybe this is the standard of this world for level 1. Right, that must be it. Hmmm? What? My luck is 0? So, what's the problem with that? After all, I've always been unlucky, so I'm already used to it. What, are you saying that it is too sad? It is too pathetic? Well, for you it might be so, but for me, it is a blessing in disguise. After all, because of it, whenever I'm unlucky, I can easily stay positive. What? Why are there tears on my eyes? Ah, that's probably because of the dust which is being carried by the wind. Really, even though it's a sunny day, there are fresh winds, as expected of another world. Anyway, let's continue the inspection.

    Hmm, this SP is definitely used to learn skill. After that, on my skill list there is Create Cheat skill that I have decided as my cheat ability and also other skills. All of the other skills are passive skills. From the names of the skills, these skills are related to what I used to do most of the time as a NEET. But, what's with the Spirit Language, Ancient Language,and Magic Programming? Let's try to see the detail. This is also a good chance to test if I can control my status menu with only my mind.

    [[Spirit Language]] Lv.3
    The language of spirits. It allows the user to speak with spirits and use Spirit Magic.


    [[Ancient Language]] Lv.1
    The language used by the ancestors of every living being in Reivalice. Other than being used for communication in the past, it will increase the effect and the strength of nowadays magic and faster casting. It also allows the user to learn Lost Magic.


    [[Magic Programming]] Lv.2
    The skill to understand and make a magic formation which usually used to cast magic or added to a magic tool and magic weapon. This skill can also be used to make new magic.


    Oooooookay. First of all, I can actually control status menu with only my mind. But, what I don't understand is, when do I learn these three skills? Hmmmmm........ Could it be this is a pattern like in isekai novel which Japanese is actually the ancient language of this world? Hmmmm.... Not good, in the end there is no instant way to test this. Well, for now, let's just put this matters aside and move on.

    Next, let's check the Title.

    [[The One Who Cheats]]
    A person who cheats.
    Effect:
    Additional Initial CP (10 CP)
    Limit Break
    Cheater's Mind


    [[Another World Traveller]]
    A person who travel to another world.
    Effect:
    None


    Whatever, I won't say anything about the description of the titles being too short and why the Another World Traveller Title doesn't have any effect. Let's just stop wasting time and check the Limit Break and Cheater's Mind effect.

    [[Limit Break]]
    The person who has this effect will have no limit. The status can surpass the limit, can learn any kind of skill, and can use any kind of weapon.


    [[Cheater's Mind]]
    The person who has this effect will always has a normal mind state.


    The effect of Limit Break really is just like I thought. But, Cheater's Mind is quite vague. The only thing I can think of is that my mind state will be just like how I always play games, so I will be more resistant to panic and gore. This one is quite dangerous, but if my mind state will be just like how I play games, the possibility this effect make me into a cold blooded person is really small. Well, guess that's another matter to be worried about later.

    Alright, now that I'm done with my status, it's time to try the best skill I have.

    [Create Cheat: Private Room](Saito)

    Oops, I got a little excited and accidentally shout it even though there's no need for that. Good thing there's no one here or it'll be embarassing. After I said that, a window appear in front of me

    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    Private Room. LV. EX
    The user of this skill will be able to access his world and customize it.
    Current CP:11
    Cost: 1000 CP
    Insufficient CP
    --------------------------------------------------------------------

    [What the!?](Saito)

    What's with that cost!? That's just crazy. Well, I guess if I'm able to do it, it will actually make me no different than God I guess. But if it's like this I should check other cheat skills just in case.

    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    Infinite MP. LV. EX
    The user will have infinite MP
    Current CP:11
    Cost: 10 CP
    Do you want to learn it?
    Yes
    No
    --------------------------------------------------------------------

    Well, good thing it only takes 10 CP. Then, how about this?

    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    CP Multiplier. LV. EX
    The gained CP will be multiplied.
    Current CP:11
    Cost: 1000 CP
    Insufficient CP
    --------------------------------------------------------------------

    So, it's also 1000 CP. Wait a sec, it says here the gained CP will be multiplied by 20 times, then what if this time I make it so that the CP Multiplier only level 1.

    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    CP Multiplier. LV. 1
    The gained CP will be multiplied by 1 times.
    Current CP:11
    Cost: 90 CP
    Do you want to learn it?
    Yes
    No
    --------------------------------------------------------------------

    And here I thought, things can't get more idiotic. Well, if it's like this the effect of level 2 and so on of the CP Multiplier is already obvious.

    Well, I guess I end this test with that. For now, I'll just save my CP and SP, besides I've been spending some time only for checking and yet I haven't been attacked by monster or a bandit. Now, that I look at things more carefully, there is actually a ground which doesn't have grass on it and make it look like a path. Usually in RPG, if I just follow this path I should be able to get to a city or a village. Now then, the only problem is should I follow the path to the left or right. Hmmmmmmmm........ Alright. I've decided, let's decide it with this.

    [eenie meenie miney mo, the correct way is this one.](Saito)

    I sing the song while moving my finger to my left and to my right while I'm standing on the path. In the end, the finger ended up on my left.

    [Well then, left it is.](Saito)
    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    A.N:I've decided to change the story a little for every chapter on my site. So, for those who actually read this on my site, I'm sorry, but I suggest to read it again from this chapter. By the way, the big changes will begin to happen when the MC has finally reached the town.
     
    Nitoryuu likes this.
  17. NZPIEFACE

    NZPIEFACE Leecher

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2016
    Messages:
    6,216
    Likes Received:
    5,972
    Reading List:
    Link
    NEET = Not in Education, Employment, or Training
     
  18. Wahyu123

    Wahyu123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    24
    Reading List:
    Link
    yep, I though there is no need to describe it anymore since I'm sure everyone already know
     
  19. NZPIEFACE

    NZPIEFACE Leecher

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2016
    Messages:
    6,216
    Likes Received:
    5,972
    Reading List:
    Link
    Dude, he's in college. Use shut-in or something.
     
  20. Wahyu123

    Wahyu123 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    42
    Likes Received:
    24
    Reading List:
    Link
    well, I just thought I should use NEET, since he doesn't even do part time work and even though he's in college, there is no progress at all.