My Pick Up Artist System (R-18 comedy, top ranked)

Discussion in 'Community Fictions' started by samsarawithwords, Aug 23, 2020.

  1. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    My Pick Up Artist System (R-18 comedy)

    comedy, modern, evolution, supernatural, fantasy, r-18, harem, dungeon, litrpg, face smacking, weak to strong, cultivation, martial arts, shameless protagonist.


    "With this system, I'll become the world's greatest seducer! If it doesn't kill me first..." I was a nobody, a short fatty Otaku. Then a girl's voice popped into my head: [Seduce a woman within a month or die.]
    "What the I'm an 18-year-old virgin..."
    [7+ looks only. No slam donkeys.]
    "You’re forcing me to die!”

    Facing annihilation, I had no choice but to join the international community of pick up artists. That’s how my boring student life became filled with craziness and womanizing. I just had one problem: "Why are these guys all insane?"

    Pick Up Artist: One who uses specialized tactics to seduce women.

    15 chapters here but there are over 220 available at the following site where it is at the top of the rankings: My Pick Up Artist System - Webnovel

    2 new chapters almost every day.

    Warning: It's not recommended to eat or drink while reading this as many readers have commented on spitting things out from laughter. I, the author, am not immune, and have also stepped on such landmines of my own placement when editing.

    Table of Contents:
    Last edited: Jan 4, 2021
  2. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    Prologue: The perfect protagonist

    These were the most powerful and influential people in the world, yet as he approached them, he only had one thought. 'In my eyes, you're all nothing...'

    It was an extravagant hall, with men and women in lavish formal wear socializing, when the butler at the entrance glanced at the dark-haired man stepping inside, and made an announcement to the guests. "Sir. Roman Antonov!"

    At the mere mention of this name, the chatter in the party died down, as everyone turned towards the entrant, revealing gazes of curiosity, desire, and fear...

    In a black tuxedo, his imposing tall handsome presence loomed over the room, as everyone whispered amongst each other.

    "It's him! The famous billionaire in the flesh! I only just saw him on the cover of Forbes. What's he doing here? Wasn't his company listed on the Dow Jones yesterday?"

    "Yes, quite remarkable. I read he came from poverty only a few years ago. Just how did he accomplish it?"

    "Is that the famous playboy? I heard he bought a 400-foot yacht he fills with supermodels every weekend. They say his estate is a real-life harem!"

    "What I can't comprehend is how he finds time for so many things. I was there when he won the US Open this year. He's the best pro tennis player I've ever seen!"

    Even a couple of posh, sweet-looking elderly women in the corner couldn't help discussing the legends of this notorious figure. "Hmm…there are rumors he's involved with some unsavory elements as well…high stakes gambling, mafia, weapons dealing… I've heard whispers of another matter too, but remember—you didn't hear any of this from me."

    "What?" the listener replied.

    "I've heard he's got a big d*ck."

    "Gasp… Harriet, stop it!"

    Roman had already grown accustomed to people gazing at him in amazement long ago. In fact, he was renowned for his cool head and even colder heart. Despite that, there was a sheen of sweat on his forehead as he scanned around the room for someone.

    A moment later, when he spotted a conspicuous brown-haired beauty holding a glass of champagne under the chandelier, surrounded by aristocrats fawning over her, he narrowed his eyes, because he'd found her...

    This woman was most uncommon: gorgeous, elegant, and with one outstanding difference from all others in the hall—she wore a tiara.

    Gulping, Roman approached her, as he put on his confident smile; the one that had proved irresistible to hundreds of the most beautiful women in the world...

    A few seconds later, as she was chatting with a French diplomat, a familiar voice came from her side: "Princess…it's been so long."

    Hearing this deep charming tone, she recognized who it was in an instant, and did her best to stifle the quiver spreading throughout her body... A trace of dangerous desire flashed in her eyes though, before she restrained it with her strength of mind developed through decades of being in the public eye. Having regained composure, she turned to him. "Mr. Antonov, what a delight it is to see you again."

    With a self-assured expression, Roman stared into her eyes. "The pleasure is all mine..." Then, he took her white-gloved hand in his, and bowed as he brought it to his lips, holding it a moment longer than customary as he locked gazes with her.

    At his touch, her heart quaked...but the princess maintained her composure, despite her breathing becoming a touch heavier...

    From then on, Roman launched into conversation, his charisma overpowering everyone nearby, helping him gain a monopoly on the beauty's attention. One by one, everyone but him and her stepped away. Their instincts gave them a clear signal--they were no longer welcome here.

    Soon, chatting turned into subtle flirting, and not long after that, scandalous whispers…

    The princess' eyes glanced around with anxiety, as her mannerisms and occasional touches began to skirt on the line of what was appropriate...

    Roman smirked, because this was what he wanted to see. He'd been attempting to seduce this beautiful princess for a while now, but there were two big roadblocks standing in his way: the unwritten laws of high society, and the fact that she was married…

    Plus, for one reason or another, unlucky circumstances kept befalling him when he tried to advance with her, delaying his pursuit.

    Today though, as the sweat continued to accumulate on his face, he swore to himself he would conquer her. 'This is it. I only need to get her alone.' Roman already pre-arranged everything: paying off the staff of the event, accomplices in the background, and even every line that left his mouth. There was only one step remaining: to take her to the back of this hall to the chosen private room, and make love to her at last...

    Giggling and blushing, the princess' expression couldn't hide her lust...letting him know the moment arrived. 'She's ready!'

    However, as he was about to say the final line, a commotion ensued!

    *Tap* *Tap* *Tap* *Tap*

    Out of nowhere, a butler sprinted through the crowd, panting as he came over to the princess and whispered something into her ear, and as the words reached her, she turned pale!

    Her breathing became a mess as she lost all traces of her royal composure! With shaky lips, she only managed to say a few words to Roman. "I-I'm sorry...I have to go! The Queen! M-my mother had an accident!" Then, she rushed out of the ballroom!

    Frozen in disbelief, he watched as she ran out of the party. A few seconds later though, when Roman recovered from the shock, sweat poured down his face! He charged out after her with a frenzied expression!

    When he reached outside though, scanning the surroundings under the moonlight, he saw what he feared most--her pretty face through the window of a helicopter! As the rotor blades spun and it began to lift off!

    His eyes gleamed and without hesitation, he sprinted towards the chopper! Moving at an insane pace! Almost inhuman!

    Observing this, the security outside the helicopter became startled! They moved to bar his way in front! Yet they couldn't stop him at all! He pushed each one to the side with ease! Sending them flying several feet!

    Looking back at his target, Roman prepared to do anything it took!

    However, the helicopter…was already in the air, climbing high up above him...

    "NOOOOO!!!" As it flew into the distance, Roman's face lost all color, his arms going limp as he dropped to his knees...

    "It can't end like this... It can't end like this..." he mumbled and over.

    Everyone nearby stared, confused by his strange behavior.

    "What's the matter with him?"

    "Has he gone insane from wealth?"

    "No, I understand his pain. I've made the same mistake—that caviar was rubbish."


    A short while later...Roman stood up in a daze, staggering off alone into the nearby trees, as onlookers gazed on in doubt.


    Half an hour later, Roman had wandered to the edge of a majestic lake.

    Gazing down at his own reflection, he barely recognized himself; so different from only a few years ago…

    "It can't end like this. I've worked so hard...Changed so much..." His breaths became ragged as he gnashed his teeth with such force, he could taste blood...

    "I did everything you asked! I've come so far! You can't do this to me now!"

    Staring into the water, his eyes filled with unwillingness, and hatred, as they turned bloodshot, and then--crimson red...

    Shaking, he looked up at the moon, and howled!

    All of a sudden, his muscles began to bulge! His pristine tailored Savile Row tuxedo started to tear! Hair grew on his face and body, soon covering it! His skeletal structure morphed as his head extended outwards! His height and bulk grew! He ripped out of his suit! Leaving not a man, but a monster! A humanoid beast! A savage creature! A werewolf!


    Yet no matter how much he changed, one thing didn't—his fury! Glancing down at his raging reflection, Roman roared! Roaring at his failure! Roaring at the world! Roaring at his fate! In desperation, he punched down into the lake!


    It wasn't a splash but an explosion! Water shot up dozens of feet into the sky! Nearby animals ran in terror!

    You could even see the bottom of the lake! He'd split the water in two!

    However, regardless of how much he bellowed, and growled, and raged, the screen in front of him, the one only he could see, never stopped counting down.

    [Death Challenge: Royal Spreading - Seduce a married woman who is a nation's royal of at least princess-tier]

    [Time remaining: 00:00:03]

    [Time remaining: 00:00:02]

    [Time remaining: 00:00:01]

    With his clawed finger pointing to the sky, the infamous billionaire roared upwards, until...all his noise suddenly stopped, as he froze like a statue, viewing the last message he'd ever receive in his life.

    [Time remaining: 00:00:00]

    As his mind faded, there was only one last thought, a final glimmer of hope before potential oblivion. 'Maybe…I can reincarna—'

    [Death Challenge failed]

    [Punishment: Annihilation]

    [Commencing punishment]

    The next moment, from top to bottom, Roman's body...disintegrated into ashes...scattering into the wind over the once again tranquil lake...

    [Punishment completed: Host's body…and soul destroyed]


    No reincarnation for him. Just ashes…

    Maybe a passing turtle or some crabs...

    Regardless...there was only one thing remaining of him in this place--the screen, the one that no one could see anymore...and even that, would merely last a few moments.

    [Detecting lack of a host]

    [Previous host data stored for review. Searching for next host. Sigh...]

    A few minutes later, a man and woman wearing black cloaks walked out of the shadows of the forest area, stopping at the place where Roman died. If one could describe their facial features, they'd only give one word--perfect.

    They were the peak of beauty.

    Gazing at the lake, the man spoke. "It's over."

    The woman nodded. "Another system user wiped...Well done." She bent down and pushed her index finger into the sand, picking up a tiny inconspicuous piece of ash, which was now, just another piece of sand...

    She stared at it for a while...before standing up, and rubbing her hands together to clean them off. "Call our people holding the family of that chef from the Queen's staff. Tell them to follow procedure."

    However, out of her expectation, the man's face became grim. "I'm afraid I can't obey that command, my lady."

    Hearing that, she froze for a moment, as she prepared herself...for combat. "Oh…why not?" Turning to face him, her expression grew icy. 'Is he going to rebel?'

    The man stared at her, as tension filled the air like the clashing of blades. He hadn't planned for it to come to this, but now, there was no other choice but to make his declaration. His eyes narrowed. "I'm out..."

    'Does he really think he can quit?' At these words, the woman's bloodlust became almost tangible. It was time...for one of them to die.

    "Of minutes on my phone..."

    With his serious expression, he clarified. "I need a order murders."


    Her Samsung bounced off his forehead.


    1: Seduce or die

    Ben thought being a virgin was bad enough. Now, he even had to die for it.

    It all started when he began his freshman year at New York University in the entering class of 2019. When he got off the train in Manhattan, his eyes shone from the surrounding splendor. In every direction, there were skyscrapers, luxury shops, and most importantly...beauties of every type imaginable!

    'This is the beginning of my colorful student life!' is what he thought to himself, right before a taxi drove over a puddle and soaked him in grimy street water. He became brown and putrid.

    'That was just a little bad luck…it's nothing.' Full of unshakeable optimism, he walked through Times Square, gazing up with joy at the massive digital billboards. In particular, the caption of one caught his attention: "Billionaire Roman Antonov has mysteriously disappeared, after last being seen at a state ball in Stockholm." Reading this, Ben blinked. 'A billionaire vanished, huh? I wonder if he left to become the love interest in a cliche female romance novel...'

    Finished musing, Ben shook his head as he continued walking, not paying attention to the changing screen which read, "In other recent news, the health scare for the Queen of Sweden has proven to be a false alarm. Reporters have confirmed the fainting spell was nothing serious, and have quoted her as saying, 'It was just gas...'"

    A while later, Ben arrived at his university dormitory with a bright smile and a warm heart. It was a shame the other students didn't notice that, instead focusing on his filthy appearance from the puddle splash earlier. Many even pointed and laughed at the "Wet dirty burrito" passing through. A student on his floor from the graphic design department even made memes of him, posting them on flyers all over the walls of his dormitory floor: "Do you want me in a bowl or pita bread?"

    "Guacamole is extra."

    "Eat me if you want diarrhea."

    They were all signed "Wet Dirty Burrito King" and even had his room number written on them.

    "My colorful student life…I can't let it end like this!" is what he said to himself, right before he saw the 50 "Personal burrito orders" written on post-its glued to his door.

    The students had deemed him the unofficial mascot of Halden Dormitory.

    "How can it be like this?" he asked himself, as he sat on the tiny bed of his dorm room. "It hasn't even been a day and I'm already finished. Am I going to remain a virgin forever?"

    [Yes] A slightly robotic, bell-like female voice emerged out of nowhere.

    "Who said that?!?" He shot up from the bed, searching in every direction but finding no one.

    [Congratulations! You have been judged to possess the worst destiny with women]

    He responded, "How is that worthy of congratulations? I'm already at rock bottom, and now even ghosts are taking shots at me?!?"

    [I am not a ghost. I am the voice of the system speaking within your head]

    [Your plight has inspired the charity of the heavens. You've unlocked the Pick Up Artist System!]

    His ears perked up when he heard that. "For real?!? Yes! My time has arrived!"

    [You have one month to seduce a woman or you will die]

    Ben froze with his fists still in the air. "Can you repeat that?"

    [One month. Seduce or die]

    His excitement degenerated into desperation. "What the I'm an 18 year old virgin…"

    After taking a minute to calm down, Ben realized it wasn't as bad as he thought. "Ok, it's not impossible. It's college after all, so if I lower my standards to the absolute bottom, it should be doable."

    [No slam donkeys. 7+ looks only]

    "7+? You might as well tell me to seduce a goddess! And what kind of system talks like that?!?"

    Another minute later, Ben came up with another unstoppable plan.

    "In the worst case, I can borrow some money and get a prostitute somewhere…"

    [No pay-pigging]

    "You're forcing me to die!"

    This time the system didn't contradict him.

    Ben tried to come up with other ideas but all he came up with were songs for his funeral.

    'I've heard that people diagnosed with terminal illnesses feel more alive than ever before after they find out, so why do I feel like sh*t?' Ben sulked.

    "This system's been misnamed. You should call it the Execution System instead. Wait…it is a system in the end. Maybe there's more to it. System, what else can you tell or show me besides insults?"

    Appearing out of thin air like a hologram, a transparent blue screen appeared in front of him. It was a vertical menu with a few categories:

    [Stats, Challenges, Store]

    Ben sighed in relief. "At long last, things are looking up." He opened Stats and read down them one by one.

    [Looks: 2 - You're short, chubby, and have idiotic hair. This one was rounded up]

    "Rounded up? ...Ok, my looks aren't my strong suit."

    [Charisma: 0 - If someone had a choice between hugging you or a fire, they would hug the fire and then chase you for revenge]

    [Social Status: 2 - Better than a homeless person, but students are in the bottom rung of society where you live]

    "Fair enough."

    [Seduction skills: 0 - You might get rejected by a tree]

    "…I've never tried. You don't know."

    [Knowledge: 4 - More knowledge means more conversation topics. Not too bad]

    Ben's head rose upwards in pride.

    [Manliness: 1 - You're one step away from being a woman, and this isn't that kind of system]

    His head came right back down in shame.

    [Communication: 3: You spent your youth talking trash in video games. This achievement is the result of your effort]

    [Personal talent: 2. Art, music, sports. How hard is it to find something you're not bad at? Get your life together]

    "I've been trying!"

    [PUA Points: 550 - Points accrued for accomplishments in Pick Up Artistry. Can be used to purchase items in the Store]

    "550, how did I get that?" Ben scanned his memories. He couldn't even remember speaking to any girls since middle school. After a long time, he recalled that he did have a girlfriend in middle school for one summer, and even kissed several other girls that year. That was his golden age, when he was thin and a bit taller than others. It was a beautiful time when he had reason to be bright and optimistic about his future.

    It wasn't until high school arrived when everyone else grew, and he stayed the same height, that he realized everything changed. People considered him short from then on. As everyone else became taller and bulkier, his results in athletics became worse and worse, until he even started to get bullied. To escape, he stopped doing sports altogether. He became introverted, spending his time at home playing video games and reading web novels, gaining weight as a result. After that, everyone shunned him.

    Only later did he discover that he peaked in middle school, which still made him angry when he thought about it.

    "I'm not Harry Potter. Who the hell peaks at 13?!?"

    "Forget it. I'll be dead in a month anyway, so it's no time to be upset about the past." Ben decided to move forward and open the Challenges, where he discovered one entry.

    [Novice Welcome - Seduce a woman within one month or die]

    "…Thanks for the warm welcome." Ben opened Novice Welcome to see if there were any more details.

    [Reward: ???]

    [Punishment: Eradication]

    [Conditions: No slam donkeys, no pay-pigging, ???]

    He shook his head and went back to the main menu screen, opening the final Store selection. His brows knitted at what he saw. "Why is there only one item?"

    [The system has many functions that are hidden until they're unlocked. That includes store items that you cannot afford with your current balance of PUA Points]

    Ben examined the available item.

    [Low Level Mystery Box: 500 points - Contains a random item anywhere from trash to rare grade]

    Ben had enough points to acquire one of these. It only took him a few moments to come to a decision."I'm already on my way to the abyss. It seems like this Mystery Box is the only hope I have. Maybe I could get something amazing that'll help me."

    Before buying it, Ben closed his eyes and clenched his fists. He couldn't stop his forehead from sweating because he knew this was his only chance to live. Desperate but hopeful, Ben steeled himself, opened his eyes, and made the purchase.

    A small, candy apple red box with a white question mark on top materialized in front of him, falling into his lap. When he touched it, a bright light filled the room.

    Life or death. It was in this little box.
    Last edited: Jan 4, 2021
  3. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    2: Divine Pick Up Line

    Ben held his breath as his eyes stared downward, shimmering with both fear and hope.

    The light faded to reveal his fate. It was…

    A ripped off corner of a paper with some scrawling on it.

    "Well…good game."

    Ben embraced his doom tightly like a long lost lover. In his head, he wrote a bucket list of things to do over the next and final month.

    [You have gained Divine Pick Up Line(Consumable, Fine) x1]

    "Wait. Divine? That should be a good thing. Then why does this look like a note someone would pass in 3rd grade? The paper isn't even big enough for me to write a goodbye letter to my family."

    After a while, Ben surmised that humans just wouldn't be able to understand the artistic sense of whatever god or demon created this system. Instead of pondering the imponderable, he sought more information about the item.

    [Divine Pick Up Line(Consumable, Fine) x1 - Use on any woman to quickly raise her attraction to you by a significant amount]

    Ben's breathing became heavy. 'This is it...' He spotted a glimmer of light up above, a possibility of escaping the deep crater he was stuck in. This little scrap of paper could be his life-saving rope.


    The door opened and a teenage boy that Ben had never seen entered the dorm room. The boy's eyebrows raised when he saw that Ben was already inside. He put his luggage down, straightened his posture, and approached Ben in a formal manner for a handshake. Not wanting to be disrespectful, Ben stood up and shook hands with him.

    "Hello, I take it you are Benjamin? I'm Fariq, from India, and we will be roommates from now on. It is a pleasure to meet you. I did not expect to share a room with an established entrepreneur, which is my great honor."

    Ben's death sentence had distracted him to the point that he forgot his roommate was coming today. Yet, there was one part of what Fariq said that confused him.

    "Entrepreneur?" Ben asked, squinting.

    Fariq's back became even straighter. "I have seen the large number of orders at our front door. I am very impressed. It is only the first day and yet you've started a business already. What is the business model? A Mexican delivery food service?" He stared at Ben as if looking at a mentor. Fariq was in the business program, so he needed to learn from real-world start-ups like this if he wanted to launch his own company in the future.

    Ben's face was gloomier than a necromancer's Facebook page. "It's nothing great like that. That's a misunderstanding."

    Fariq nodded over and over in appreciation. "Modesty is a virtue. Good. Good. I can see that I will learn much from you and am looking forward to becoming friends."

    '…Friends.' To Ben, that word was like an idiom in a foreign language; He knew the translation, but he didn't understand the true meaning. 'When was the last time I had a friend outside of chat rooms?'

    Ben could see that Fariq was sincere and it improved his mood. 'It's my first day and I've already made a friend.' He found hope for the future. 'That's right, this is the beginning of my wonderful future. I may have made many mistakes in the past, but I'm still young and have infinite possibilities ahead of me. Who's to say I can't accomplish great things?' It was the spring of his youth!

    [29 days and 23 hours remaining until eradication]

    'Oh my god, Debbie Downer is living in my head! I didn't need to hear that just now!'

    [Would you like to turn off the hourly alarm?]

    'It seems like the system also responds to thoughts. Yes, f*cking turn it off. It's not like I'll soon forget the approach of my impending death…' His mental ramblings were interrupted by the sound of a wild animal.


    Ben looked down at his stomach and realized he hadn't eaten all day. He took the train in the morning, then was busy with registering and organizing his dorm room all day. Having already washed off the brown waste that covered him earlier, he decided it was a good time to go downstairs and try out the dorm cafeteria. It was getting late so he hoped it hadn't closed yet. Ben invited Fariq, who couldn't go because he had to contact his family and unpack. So Ben went alone.

    As Ben passed through the halls, his face brightened up a little because someone had taken down the meme posters of him. 'I guess there are good people in the world.' He used the elevator to reach the ground floor and walked toward the cafeteria. As he passed the entrance, someone next to him yelled, "Hey, Burrito King!"

    Ben looked over and found Tyler, the roommate of the person who created those memes of him, and one of the people who posted them everywhere. Ben's mood dropped like a stone again. He thought he'd left his dark past of bullying behind, but it didn't even take a day for people to push him down, burying him in the same lightless hole.

    "You still taking orders?" Tyler and another student laughed in Ben's face as they got drinks from the vending machine.

    Ben wanted to stand up for himself, but he wasn't a fighter. He made his stand once when he was younger. That's when he learned how much crueler reality was than the movies. The only result of his bravery was a beating from a bully that put him in bed for two weeks. Since then, he always kept his head down, having understood that walking in shame was better than lying down in it.

    As Ben prepared to walk away, he caught a powerful scent of floral perfume exuding from behind him. When he turned around, it only took an instant, but what he saw mesmerized him.

    Standing there was a gorgeous girl. She had an exotic Mediterranean face like a femme fatale from a James Bond movie. Olive skin complimented her neck-length dark hair, which waved when she moved like ocean currents under dim moonlight. She was talking on the phone and hadn't noticed Ben drooling yet.

    Ben gulped. 'What a beauty...'

    *Sneer* "Don't even dream about it, you scrub," Tyler said when he saw Ben gazing at the girl, lost in a trance.

    Ben clenched his fists, shivering. 'I can't even daydream in peace?!?'

    With heavy breathing, he took out the consumable Divine Pick Up Line from his pocket and stared at it for a long time...

    Was this the moment? He hadn't seen such a beautiful girl since arriving in Manhattan, but this was his life he was playing with. Failure meant probable death. His heartbeat sped up as he grasped the realization that this was the most important decision he'd ever made. One chance. That's all he had.

    'Should I use it now?'
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2020
  4. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    3: Casanova enters the scene

    "Stop staring freak. You're a disgusting worm to girls like her," Tyler insulted Ben as he stepped forward to stand at Ben's side and smirked. "That's Penelope. You couldn't get her to talk to you to save your life, so stop looking before you embarrass yourself."

    Ben gritted his teeth. This girl was way out of his league, but why did bastards like this always have to rub it in his face?!? Ben was reaching his breaking point.

    He came all the way to New York City hoping to start a new life, only to be treated like trash, and told he would die in one month if he didn't do the impossible! He couldn't take it anymore!

    'I couldn't get her to talk to me to save my life?!? Even if that was true before, things can change!' He gripped the Divine Pick Up Line in his hand, feeling the dry paper rub against his skin.

    'Tyler's right about one thing, this IS to save my life! Screw it!' Ben planned to wait for a perfect opportunity, to find a pretty girl somewhere to use the Divine Line on, but the system said it would work on any woman, so she might as well be a top beauty!

    He turned to Tyler, "You said I couldn't get her to even talk to me? Then watch!"

    Tyler was taken aback by this outburst, but soon sneered. "This should be funny."

    Ben ignored him. When Penelope got off the phone call, he took a deep breath, squeezed the paper in his palm, and walked into the flames. Annihilation or rebirth,

    *Gulp* "Excuse me, m..mi..miss…" he stuttered.

    Tyler and his buddy were already pointing at him and chuckling, getting ready to emasculate Ben once Penelope rejected him. They were certain that any moment now, he would be humiliated in front of the entire cafeteria.

    Penelope hadn't snubbed Ben right away, but it wasn't a good thing. It was only because she didn't hear him! She was still texting on her phone!

    "Miss!" Ben spoke louder.

    "Ah!" Penelope jumped back, startled. She held her phone to her chest in a defensive posture as she glanced at Ben like he was about to assault her.

    Tyler was bent over now, laughing at Ben like he was a sideshow clown.

    'This is not going well.' Ben felt his heart leap up his throat. His hands were shaking as he raised the paper to his face and read from it.

    'F*ck my life.'

    He made a terrible miscalculation. The text was tiny, so he hadn't studied it in detail during the short time before Fariq's entrance. Now he saw that it was complete gibberish! It didn't resemble English or any language he'd heard of!

    'What is this garbage?' He tried to read from it. 'Druhhin…Uut...'

    Out of nowhere, Ben's pupils dilated and his body froze. 'What's happening?' He could still think, but couldn't move or control anything. He was a statue, or so he thought…

    Suddenly, "Ben" stretched his neck and took a step towards Penelope, but this wasn't the real Ben at all! His body moved on its own!

    'I've been possessed!' The "Ben" in the cafeteria was walking, being controlled like a video game character. Ben viewed everything from his eyes as usual, but someone or something commanded his body. He felt his eyes relax and his lips stretch, forming a casual smile, an expression almost like…confidence?

    "Miss, that's the textbook for Macroeconomics, isn't it…" Ben pointed to a book under Penelope's arm.

    Penelope's eyes widened, glimmering in surprise. Ben was even more shocked. It wasn't because he somehow knew about the textbook, but because he was speaking a foreign language!

    The Ben watching from inside only spoke English. How was his body able to converse in another language so fluently? Even though the real Ben couldn't say a word of it himself, at this moment, he could still somehow understand everything, and also recognize that it was Greek.

    Tyler and his friend had their eyes bulge out! They couldn't believe this short fatty spoke a rare foreign language so well.

    After a slight surprise, Penelope responded in Greek, "It is…"

    Ben shook his head and sighed. "Too bad...If you're taking that class then you've missed a huge opportunity for the easiest perfect grade..." Then he turned around and prepared to walk away.

    The real Ben went crazy. 'What are you doing bastard?!? Turn back around and woo her off her feet! You stole daddy's body so at least give me a good show!'

    "Wait!" Penelope shouted.

    Ben felt as his lips stretched wider into an expectant smile. He turned around.

    "What did you mean by that?" Penelope's attention was captured.

    "That book is last year's edition. There's a new edition with an extra section that had only been available to professors before--questions and answers. The professors here use that section to create their exams. If you had it then it would be like having the tests in advance."

    Penelope's eyebrows arched upwards. "At the book store, they said this was the latest edition though…"

    "The new edition will be available in a few days as an online-only version at the publisher's website."

    Penelope's eyes shined. She became excited! Everyone knew how difficult the classes at this university were. Her English was only intermediate, so studying would be even harder for her. Having the tests beforehand would be a godsend! Still, there was a concern in the back of her mind. "Isn't that…cheating?"

    Ben smirked. "It's not cheating if you don't get caught." Then he turned and strolled away again.

    'Don't play with me! Get your ass back there and finish the job!' Real Ben was fuming. He couldn't handle this back and forth pace.

    When Penelope saw Ben leaving, she panicked. She had been nervous before coming to the USA because she didn't know anyone here. She was an unfamiliar girl in a foreign country, with no friends, no fellow students to speak Greek with. Now, this guy came out of nowhere and spoke her language. He even knew these hidden tips about school and seemed so aloof. She couldn't let him go like that! This boy was too intriguing!

    "Ah! Wait a second!" This time Penelope ran to him, with an eager smile on her face, and flushed cheeks.

    Tyler's jaw dropped! Did this beauty chase after the Burrito King? He couldn't believe it! A few others in the cafeteria also rubbed their eyes to make sure they weren't seeing things.

    Penelope asked him, "Can I have your number?"

    At this moment, Ben felt like his brain had rebooted. He was back in the driver's seat. It's too bad the timing was awful since he was at a total loss for what to do. 'No. Bring Casanova back!' he cried, but there was no use. The Greek-speaking, charming alter ego was nowhere to be found.

    "Tha mou dóseis loipón ton arithmó sou?" Penelope looked at him with expectant eyes.

    'Oh sh*t...No wait, she asked for my number before. Ok, I can do that much.' Keeping his mouth shut, Ben took out his phone and showed her his number on the screen. After he confirmed she watched her save him as a contact, he did an about-face and walked out of the cafeteria.

    Having seen everything, it was now Tyler's turn to be a statue, standing there gawking like a fool. He and his friend were speechless!

    On Ben's way out, he glared at them. 'You said daddy couldn't get her to talk to me? I didn't have to. She ran over and did it herself! She even asked for my number! Could you do that? No! Never underestimate my colorful student life, bastard!'

    Ben left the lunchroom in the highest spirits. That was the first time he'd spoken to a girl and received such a warm reaction. So what if it was only his body and some charm demon doing the talking? That's called having a stunt double. If Hollywood stars could do it, why couldn't he?

    Then, mid-step, he halted.

    In his excited state, Ben had left the cafeteria. There was only one problem--he forgot to eat!

    'Should I go back? …No way, too embarrassing.'

    It was instant noodles for dinner.
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2020
  5. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    4: The thong test

    5 days later…

    "Why hasn't she called!!!" Ben was sitting on his bed with his face buried in his hands. He thought he made it out of the woods. He thought he had a chance to live. But he discovered he was too naive!

    "That Divine Line was actually a death sentence!"

    He was tricked into a sense of complacency. Ben figured since the line went well, everything would work out with Penelope. Instead, death approached closer and closer like a runaway train.

    Over the past week, he'd started class. The first couple of days were fine. He waited for Penelope to call while focusing on his studies. Then with every following day, he lost more and more sleep as reality sank in. His eyes became black as he grew pale and carried a nervous sweat at all times. His face was that of a ghoul!

    Though what could you expect from someone on death row? She hadn't called and he was out of moves. There were no PUA Points left and was helpless without them. He wasn't charming. He didn't speak Greek. When talking to a girl, he could barely speak English!

    'It's the end. What should I do? I have no cheats from the pick up artist system. How the hell am I supposed to become a pick up artist?' Drowned by depression, Ben lied down in his bed.

    A few moments later, he shot right back up. "Wait…pick up artist. That's not a term invented by the system. That's a real thing. Though I laughed in his face, didn't my idiot cousin Antonio call himself a pick up artist the last time we spoke?"

    Ben stood up and paced around the room. "It's ridiculous to depend on that fool...but what other option do I have?" Ben picked up his phone and called his cousin.

    *Ring* *Ring*

    "Yo cuz, what's up?" Antonio answered.

    "Antonio! You have to help me!"

    His cousin was startled. "What's the matter? Did you get kidnapped?"

    "Worse! Listen, I have to meet you! Where are you?"

    Ben received Antonio's location, grabbed his metro card, and ran out of the dorm.

    Inside a Starbucks in Midtown, the front door shot open. Someone entered at suck speed that the employees thought it was the cartoon Road Runner. They were relieved when they saw it was a short teenager, then became disturbed again when they saw his brown hair; It was styled in an atrocious huge perm. They only relaxed once they remembered that New York was filled with all kinds of strange characters.

    Ben searched the cafe before running to a back table. There sat a young man with tanned sand-colored skin and a shaved head. He was skinny and of average height but gazed around the room with unbridled arrogance, like he was a young noble from an ancient family. Meanwhile, he drank water because he didn't want to spend 2 dollars on a coffee.

    Upon reaching the table, Ben grabbed his hands. "Antonio, I need your help!"

    "...Cuz, calm down first. Tell me what happened."

    Ben wasn't sure what to say. 'Should I tell him a voice popped into my head and is forcing me to seduce women? He'll have me committed.' He needed to come with something else, so he took a few seconds to gather his thoughts.

    "It's like this. I must seduce women!" Ben couldn't think of a good reason, so he skipped the reason instead.

    Antonio inspected him. Ben's eyes were bloodshot, redder than the devil's butt-cheeks. He was sweating buckets, had shaking hands, and panted uncontrollably. Antonio squinted his eyes, then nodded in understanding.

    'So this is the legendary thirst…' Antonio believed Ben was going virgin crazy. "Ok. I understand."

    Ben followed up. "You told me you know a master pick up artist right? I need to meet him!"

    "…Whoa, slow down cuz. You should start slow so let me show you the ropes first. You're soundin' like Icarus and sh*t."

    "I don't have time to play in the kiddie pool! I need to talk to a true master right away!" Ben wasn't saying Antonio was a waste, he was only thinking it.

    Antonio looked at this cousin of his: short, chubby, stupid clothes, even stupider hair. 'This will take massive work. Well...that guy might appreciate a hopeless case like this.' He made a decision. "Ok, hold on. I'll make the call." He got up and went outside, calling this acquaintance.

    A few minutes later, Antonio returned and sat down. Ben stared at him like he was a doctor with news on his mother's surgery results.

    "He said he'll meet you…on one condition."

    "Say it!"

    Antonio didn't want to say it. *Cough* "Wea* *…*****." He only managed to mumble it.

    "What? Speak up!"

    Ben swallowed. "He said…you have to…wear a thong."

    "What?" Ben double-checked.

    "A thong…Wear one if you want to meet him."

    "Is this guy a master pick up artist or a gay r*pist?!?"

    …Antonio wasn't sure how to justify it either. "Look, he said he needs to test the bravery of any prospective student. If you don't have the courage to wear a thong, then you don't have what it takes and it would be a waste of time meetin' you. That's what he said."

    Ben clenched his jaw as he flushed his dignity down the toilet. Screw it! If he failed, they'd be putting him in a casket. They could bury him in a thong for all he cared. At least the funeral would be memorable. "Damn it! Fine, I'll wear it!"

    The two of them walked over to a cheap department store. Ben entered and did some retail therapy that might lead to needing actual therapy.

    A store employee passed and saw Ben browsing through the female underwear section. 'He must be browsing for a gift for his girlfriend,' she guessed as she approached him to offer help. After one step, she stopped dead in her tracks. She watched Ben holding various thongs against his waist, trying to guess his size…

    It was clear now. The thong was for him. Ben noticed her presence and they locked eyes…

    A second later, they both turned around and walked in opposite directions.
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2020
  6. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    5: Meeting a master of seduction

    *Ding* *Dong*

    Ben and Antonio were at the front door of a two-story house in Brooklyn. A few moments after ringing the doorbell, a man opened the door.

    He was 30ish and tall, with an imposing heavy-set frame, but what was most striking was his outfit. It was epic. He wore a curved purple pimp hat capped by a red feather. It partnered with his chinstrap beard to frame his thick face and eyebrows. With a purple bathrobe to match, he gave off the impression of a cartoon emperor from a Sesame Street character's deluded nightmare.

    'What have I gotten myself into?' Ben wondered.

    "What's the password?" The man queried.

    Antonio and Ben glanced at each other in confusion.

    The big man took out his phone and played a song.

    "I like it when the beat goes.

    Baby make your booty go-oo-ooo.

    Baby I know you want to show.

    That thong thong thong thong thong."

    It was "Thong Song" by Sisqo.

    Ben's face turned green. He had to summon the strength of his ancestors to avoid walking away. He gritted his teeth in determination. Dead men didn't have the luxury to care about self-respect. Besides, what self-respect? He was already wearing the damn thing!

    Ben pulled the top of his pants down a bit to flash the shiny fabric.

    The Big man nodded as his eyes showed appreciation. "You're qualified, come in."

    'Because of a thong? Am I qualified? Am I really?!?' Ben cursed this perverted bastard.

    As Ben and Antonio entered the house, a woman's shout came from above.

    "Eugene! Who is it?!?"

    "Shut up ma'! I've got guests!"

    Ben felt the thong's silky texture brushing against his legs as he walked. He made a decision. With this shame haunting his soul, if it still didn't work out, forget waiting a month, he would end it tonight.

    The three sat down on sofas in a basement with fish tanks everywhere. "Welcome to my underwater man cave," the large man said.

    'Is that a man cave for fish? Wtf? I suppose it is a cave technically, because it's his mom's basement!' Ben felt like crying. This was his savior?

    "I haven't introduced myself. They call me Beluga."

    "Because you're a big guy?" Ben asked.

    "No, because beluga caviar is the rarest and most expensive," Beluga responded with a prideful expression.

    'Yea…I'm not sure that's why they call you that though,' Ben thought.

    At this moment, Beluga crossed his legs. By coincidence, Ben noticed he was also wearing a thong!

    An issue plagued Ben's mind. 'He forced me to wear one. Now having seen he's in a thong himself, should I feel better or worse?'


    Ben shook his head. "What's with the thong thing?"

    "…You don't know? Chicks like it. You've gotta be open-minded and willing to take risks in this game."

    Ben wasn't sure if he was serious. 'Ye…I'm not sure about that. Regardless, in this case, I prefer my mind nice and closed.'

    Beluga tried to make Ben feel welcome. "Ben right? Antonio has told me all about you. He asked me to invite you here to my home. Here we are. Look around you. I know it's hard to believe…that you've been granted the opportunity in your life to run into a peak specimen like me. Well, I'm here to tell you. It's real. One day, this could be your future."

    Ben looked around at the dark dump filled with fish tanks. Death was starting to sound not that bad to Ben.

    Ben narrowed his eyes. 'I'm having trouble believing this guy. This is a master pick up artist? Let me test him first.'

    "Beluga, you're a master pick up artist, right?" Ben inquired.

    "Certified," Beluga responded.


    Ben didn't understand what that meant, but he continued. "Then I have this problem with this girl…" Ben told Beluga about the situation with Penelope. He needed to understand why she hadn't contacted him.

    Beluga laughed. "The reason for your problem is simple; It's because you gave your number to a pretty girl."

    Ben squinted in confusion. "I don't understand."

    Beluga clarified. "Look, the cheapest thing to attractive females is male attention. They're surrounded by it, hounded. Attractive females, especially ones in crowded places like universities, have an infinite amount of options. They'll never call you. They're too busy getting attention from the next guy. It doesn't matter how well your meeting went because attention is its own reward for females. It gives them a kick of dopamine. That's why you can't ever give your number if there's an alternative. You have to get her number. Besides, you failed her sh*t test."

    "Sh*t test?" Ben confirmed.

    Beluga answered him. "A sh*t test is a female's way of finding out if you're qualified to date her. She wants to see if you have what it takes. Some tests, they throw out consciously. Some subconsciously. You'll know you failed one when she walks away. When that girl asked you for your number, that was a subtle sh*t test. She wanted to see if you knew enough to flip it and get her number. You showed you didn't..."

    Beluga continued, "You failed that test. As for how serious that mistake was? It depends on the test and the female. In this case, it wasn't fatal, but I doubt she'll be calling you."

    These new concepts intrigued Ben. "So the tests are to see if you have what it takes...What does it take?"

    Beluga laughed. "You've got to push the right buttons. Sh*t tests are only one part of the puzzle. What does it take? Knowledge of how females think, confidence, charm, experience, and more. To put it in one word—it takes game."

    "...Game?" Ben recognized the word but didn't understand the meaning in this scenario.

    "Game…That's how we in the pick up artist community refer to skill at interacting with females. They use the term too when they say 'You've got game.' They know the truth. Some of them won't admit it though. The term game is meaningful. This dance between men and women…it's a lot like a game. In fact, if the only thing you changed was to view your exchanges with females as a game, you'd already be far ahead of most men." Beluga smiled.

    Ben was deep in thought, trying to digest everything. 'I suppose it shouldn't be hard. After all, I have a game-like pick up artist system in my head.'

    Beluga then leaned in. He stared deep into Ben's eyes with a stern expression. "Remember this Benjamin. Beware…beware of the sh*t tests! Always! I don't care if you've been married 40 years. Watch out for them even then! If not, they'll be the death of you. Beware!"

    Ben swallowed. Beluga made them sound like ghosts or demons. "Don't worry. I'm already afraid."

    Beluga calmed down. "Good. With that out of the way, we can discuss the ultimate thing you came here to learn…"

    Beluga stood up and looked at Ben. His tone became mysterious. "Mastering the art of seduction!"
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2020
  7. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    6: We're stuck in caveman bodies

    Beluga was giving Ben his first lecture. "Benjamin, I'll tell you this. Mastering the art of seduction is a long pursuit, but it isn't as hard as you think to get started. Ok, lesson one. Stand up and repeat after me. 'I'm the best looking and most charming man you've ever seen.'"

    Ben was hesitant but followed his instructions. "I'm the best loo—"

    "No! Say it to me..." Beluga interrupted.

    Ben tried again. "…You're...the best looking and most charming man I've ever seen?"

    Beluga looked into a mirror he had hanging on the wall to his side. "I know. Ok, good. You've got potential."

    Ben leaned over to Antonio and whispered, "Some of the stuff he said was interesting, but is this guy serious? Or is he only fishing for compliments?"

    Antonio replied with confidence, "Trust me, he's no joke. He's a legend in our community. His rep on the forums is top-tier."

    Ben's eyebrows knitted. 'Did he say forums? Is this an epic 4chan troll? I don't know what that means, but it doesn't sound reliable at all…'

    When Beluga finished admiring his reflection, he continued speaking. "Benjamin, we're having a nice banter here, but you can't just walk in here and become my disciple. You need to prove yourself first. Only the bravest of men are qualified to become true pick up artists. I need you to show me you're willing to do what it takes."

    Benjamin glanced at him. "Was wearing a thong not enough?"

    Beluga answered, "No, that was my gift to you. A free style tip. Next comes the proper test in the field."

    Ben thought, 'Keep your damn gifts next time! ...Is he going to make me wear the thong in public?' Ben wasn't excited about this test but decided to see what Beluga proposed first.

    The three went to a public shopping mall nearby. Being midday, it was loaded with people. They were near the food court which had many cafes and people sitting down eating. Ben looked around. There were many women in the vicinity.

    As people passed them, some would point at Beluga. It wasn't a surprise. He hadn't changed at all. He wore his purple pimp hat and bathrobe with pride.

    Ben wanted to run far away from him, but he was also wearing a thong underneath, so he wasn't holding the moral high ground either.

    Beluga put his hand on Ben's shoulder. "Ok. Here's what you'll do. You see that female sitting down? Approach her and say this…" He gave Ben his version of a divine line.

    Ben's eyes widened in shock. "Are you serious?"

    Beluga gazed into his eyes. "I've never told a joke in my life."

    Ben gulped. He gazed at the woman Beluga told him to approach as his heart sped up and his hands became clammy. It wasn't the line that made him nervous. It was the idea of approaching a woman...

    "You're worried, right? Afraid?" Beluga asked.

    Ben hesitated but nodded.

    Beluga said, "Look. Think of it this way. What's the worst that can happen? Say you open her and she rejects you. Then you'll be in the same place you are right now. Isn't that the worst case scenario? Why should you care about that? Why should that stop you?"

    Ben blinked a few times while processing the information. "But…"

    Beluga interrupted him. "No buts. You know why you're scared? It's because your body is still programmed from the caveman days. Human society has advanced but our bodies have lagged behind. It's not surprising. It takes thousands or even hundreds of thousands of years for significant evolution to occur. In caveman times, if you approached a female, you may have had to fight some man to the death for the opportunity to mate with her. Now? Nothing. There's no such negative consequence…"

    Beluga continued. "We live in a country full of police where even fighting can get you sent to jail and sued. People are civil. There's nothing to be afraid of, yet your body is still hard-wired to be nervous about an impending deathmatch against a caveman. That's why despite your mind knowing you have nothing to lose, your body is resisting,"

    These words were a shock to Ben's mind. 'Is that true? …Why am I so nervous?' He stood there for a minute as he visualized what could happen if he approached the woman and failed. A while later, he realized...there wasn't anything that bad! Most likely, she would say no and that was it.

    'He's right...' Ben understood the truth and his nerves eased a little. He looked down and clenched his fists. So what if she rejected him? Hasn't he been getting rejected by everyone his entire life?


    When Ben looked up, his eyes changed. They were filled with determination. He took a deep breath, glanced at the woman, and walked towards her.

    "Excuse me, miss…"

    The woman was surprised an unknown teenager was speaking to her, but was cordial in her reply. "Yes?"

    Ben recalled the line Beluga gave him. He didn't know if it would work, but Antonio said Beluga was a legendary master. He chose to trust him for now. Still, his nerves were shaking and he had to calm himself down. 'You can do this. Remember, there's nothing to lose. What's the worst that can happen? She'll say no and you'll walk away. No Big deal.'

    The woman observed Ben. Here was a nice boy with an honest face. He seemed like a dependable student, the future of America.

    Wearing his sincere expression, Ben gazed at the woman. He radiated righteousness. With bright eyes and a clear heart, he told her his best line.

    "I love your tits."

    Ben walked back to Beluga with a red palm print on his face.

    Author's Note:
    Not exactly a divine line, but there’s a good reason Beluga gave him a line like that. It’ll be explained around chapter 10.

    Things will get better for poor Ben soon. I promise haha.
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2020
  8. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    7: A better result

    Ben wasn't feeling great, but Antonio and Beluga encouraged him. They said that in the beginning, it was normal to be rejected, even necessary.

    Ben thought about it. 'Whatever. It's only a palm print. It'll come off. Even the shame will wash off with time…' He wasn't ready to quit.

    Beluga pointed out another woman and Ben decided he would try again. He approached her.

    "Excuse me, miss…"

    "Oh, hello. Yes?"

    Ben considered how to improve. 'Beluga said I need to show more sincerity…right, sincerity.' He knew what to do.

    "I want to marry your tits."

    Ben walked back to Beluga and Antonio, this time with coffee all over his face.

    Ben thought about the outcome. 'Beluga said improvement comes as you collect many approaches, adjusting your method by learning from better results. But was that a better or worse result?'

    He pondered. 'Is it better to get slapped or get coffee in the face?'


    Ben weighed both sides of the argument. 'On one hand, the last woman was willing to waste the coffee she spent money on to express her hatred. On the other hand, there's a tiny chance she thought I looked thirsty...'

    Ben felt it was important to look for small positives in bleak situations. Little by little, he was developing an optimistic outlook. So what if a psychologist would label it delusional? What do they know? They don't approach women. Their clients come to them.

    He approached more women using the previous lines or modifying them to try something different. Each time he'd return to Beluga with a new "gift."

    After the last one, onion rings in his hair, Ben became frustrated. "Damn! What use is this? There's no way I can get any good result from saying these things!"

    Beluga snorted. "Is that right? Check this. I'll use the same line I gave you and get a good result. Watch and learn." Beluga approached a woman and said the line.

    She frowned. Several seconds later, she got up and left. Beluga watched her walk away as he nodded to himself. Then he turned around and swaggered back to Ben and Antonio with a triumphant smile. "Did you see that?"

    Ben responded, "Yea…she just walked away."

    Beluga's eyes glimmered, satisfied with Ben's answer. "Good. You understand..."

    'What the f*ck do I understand?!?' Ben was confused.

    Beluga saw Ben still hadn't grasped it so he clarified. "That was a good result."


    Beluga continued. "Unlike you, she didn't hit me. She JUST walked away. That's charm," Beluga said with a raised chin.

    'I think it's because you look like an insane person though…' Ben had different ideas. He sighed. 'Whatever. I have nothing to lose. Let's keep at it.' Ben continued to approach women. After the 10th one, something happened.

    [User has unlocked Achievement system]

    [Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Newbie Opener(common) - Open 10 women]

    [Distributing reward: PUA Points + 100]

    [Challenge system unlocked - User will receive a new challenge every week. If a challenge is completed, the challenge for the following week will unlock early]

    [Weekly Challenge: It's a numbers game - Open 100 women]

    [Reward: Stat Point(Random) x1]

    [Completion status: 10/100]

    Ben started panting. "Yes!" He screamed in the middle of the mall.

    Beluga and Antonio glanced at him, wondering if he was having a breakdown.

    'This is it! I've found my way out!' The system appeared again at last. Ben saw hope. He laughed off his outburst, reassuring Antonio and Beluga that he was only hit by a wave of motivation. Eager for more points, he wanted to approach more women. An even thirstier Ben was unleashed on the mall.

    With madness and excitement in his eyes, he fired openers at women like a machine gun. His speaking tone became faster and more energetic. He figured being more high energy might improve his outcomes.

    The women had a different perspective. A tweaker methhead was coming at them!

    After a while, Ben heard a sound he had prayed for in his dreams.

    [Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Shameless Assault Victim(uncommon) - Get assaulted by 3 women in one day]

    [Distributing reward: PUA Points + 200]

    Hot coffee dripped down Ben's face as he laughed like a crazy person. 'You can even receive points for that! Amazing!'

    This was the path to becoming a masochist!

    '150 more points and I can buy another Low Level Mystery Box!' Ben was becoming addicted to this "Game." Another helpless victim of micro-transactions.

    All of a sudden, Ben heard another system sound and became even more ecstatic!

    [Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Fugitive of Love (fine) - Get reported by 3 unknown women in one day for harassment]

    The smile on Ben's face froze. '…This is bad.'

    [Distributing reward: PUA Points + 500]

    'Nevermind! Way to go Ben! History is told by the winners!'

    To Ben, Points were king. Points were god.
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2020
  9. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    8: Stat Growth Multiplier

    Ben was back in his dorm laughing like a crazy person. 800 points! He earned 800 points just from getting rejected! If it allowed him to live, he didn't mind getting rejected a thousand times!

    Back at the mall, Beluga had commended Ben's efforts and they agreed to meet again next weekend. Antonio also said he would come. Still, time was running out for Ben to complete his system's death mission. Before meeting them, he needed to make the most of every day. He checked his completion status for his weekly challenge to open 100 women.

    [Completion status: 15/100]

    'Still a long way to go. I can raise that myself during the week though. First things first, I should use these points.' Ben opened the store and saw that like before, only the Low Level Mystery Box was available for 500. He didn't have a choice so he bought one.

    A red box appeared in front of him. Without hesitation, he opened it, illuminating the room. When the light dissipated, a flat card was lying in Ben's lap. He picked it up.

    [Low Level Stat Growth Multiplier(Consumable, Fine, Looks) x1]

    "What's this do?"

    [The Low Level Stat Growth Multiplier can be activated to provide a growth boost in a particular stat for one week. During that period, activities that develop that stat will provide 10x the results. The item will also increase the user's motivation to perform those activities, as well as efficiency and recovery while doing so. This item is locked to the Looks stat]

    "Amazing! So if I take a class or train in some activity, I'll get 10 weeks of results in only 1!" Then he realized something more amazing. "Low level? So higher levels would have even bigger boosts?!?" Ben gasped. His mind raced in excitement.

    'Ok, that's too far off in the future. I need to survive this month first!' Taking a closer glance at the item's description, he considered what activities he could do to develop his looks. As he looked down at his chubby gut, the best answer was obvious. This was his a heaven-sent opportunity to improve his body! Ben couldn't wait any longer and activated the Low Level Stat Growth Multiplier.

    At that moment, a wave of motivation hit him. It was like he had a strong itch to work out or improve his appearance somehow. He felt bad sitting there not doing anything! Ben was also impatient to see what results the 10x multiplier would give. So he changed into casual wear and headed to the university gym that was free for students.

    When Ben was in high school, his parents tried to motivate him to get in shape many times but it never stuck. When he played sports in school, he would get bullied so he avoided them. Working out and dieting were too difficult.

    If his parents asked him to diet? The idea's nice, but he was hungry! Did they want him to starve?!?

    They wanted him to lift weights? Easier said than done. That sh*t is heavy!

    As Ben walked into the gym, his feelings differed completely from the last time. He used to have a strong sense that he didn't belong. Now? The powerful motivation from the Stat Growth Multiplier overwhelmed him! He needed to make gains! He felt like a gym addict!

    Ben learned how to access the facilities and use the gym lockers. Then he entered the weight room. He didn't know much about working out, but using cardio and weightlifting machines wasn't too complicated. His parents had paid for a personal trainer for him once who had taught him a basic program. Ben still remembered it. So he hit the machines and broke a sweat. His current training intensity was unimaginable for the old him. Get results! Push harder! Faster!

    An hour later, Ben was covered in sweat and out of breath. He wanted to work out more, but his body wasn't in good enough shape to handle it. His plan was to increase his training load as the week progressed. Right now, he had to rest and recover. As Ben walked out of the gym, he ran into an acquaintance. He frowned as he watched Tyler enter with several friends.

    "Is that Burrito King?" Tyler and his group laughed.

    Ben frowned but knew it was a waste of time talking to bullies, so he tried to walk past them.

    Tyler moved to block his path. "You must've mistaken this place for the cafeteria. You're in the wrong spot. This is the gym. It's not a place for couch potato wastes like you!" Tyler and his friends laughed.

    Ben snorted. Tyler was one to talk. Ben was fat but Tyler wasn't skinny either. Although he seemed popular and was better looking than Ben, he wasn't an athlete himself. Ben thought about his Stat Growth Multiplier and decided to teach this guy a lesson. "Is that right? So you're saying I'm wasting my time here?"

    Tyler looked at him, chuckling. "Uh, yeah! That's exactly it."

    Ben smirked. "Tell you what…How about we make a bet?"

    Tyler was silent. He wasn't sure where Ben was going with this.

    Ben explained. "One week from now, whichever one of us is in worse shape...has to call the other daddy for a year!"

    Tyler looked at his friends and they all broke out into mad laughter!

    "Is he serious?!?"

    "This fat-ass worked out one day and thinks he'll be an athlete?!?"

    "I can't! HAHAA!"

    Ben was too fat! Even if he lost 5 kilograms, he would still be chubbier than Tyler! He could start pumping steroids and run a marathon right now, and he still wouldn't win that bet in one week! Even liposuction wouldn't work! What was he expecting to achieve in such a short time?

    "Ok, I like that idea. You're on Burrito King!" Tyler agreed, snickering at Ben's ridiculous proposal. It would be a good chance to embarrass him later.

    Ben smiled and walked past them to leave. 'I'm looking forward to adopting a cute new foster son.'

    As Ben left, he thought about his next Mystery Box. He hoped it would have an item that worked on milfs so he could meet Tyler's mom and become his official stepdad.
  10. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    9: Swole daddy

    Ben stared into the bathroom mirror and didn't recognize the person looking back.

    "Holy sh*t!"

    He wasn't a fatty anymore! In only one week, all the fat came off. What's more is his muscles were chiseled. He was lean, not huge like a bodybuilder, but he looked like an athlete! Ben had gone to the gym every day. Yesterday, he trained for 3 hours before becoming exhausted. These were the inevitable results from training like an animal.

    This is what 10 weeks of hard work in the gym could do! Ben felt lucky the Stat Multiplier was for Looks and not another stat. If it was for knowledge or communication, it would be difficult to say if he could make a significant leap. After all, people study for years to get entry-level degrees. Meanwhile, 10 weeks in the gym is enough time to make a total physical transformation.

    His face also appeared somewhat more attractive. Although it was only average, at least he was part of the single chin club now. Too bad he couldn't do anything about his height. No doubt his style could use a lot of work too.

    Ben checked his stats. He had received several alerts before.

    [Looks: 5 - You're short and have idiotic hair. Your body is decent though so targeting blind women is an option. Just don't let them touch your hair]

    Ben started flexing in the mirror. "Yes! Blind women will do just fine!"

    [Charisma: 0 - This is still at leper level]

    "...I need to take a leadership class."

    [Social Status: 2 - Students are our future. Too bad we live in the present.]

    [Seduction skills: 0 - Consider blow-up dolls]

    "I can't afford one!"

    [Knowledge: 4 - Entry-level student]

    [Manliness: 3 - Congratulations. Both balls have dropped]

    …Ben was about to celebrate that he also gained two points in manliness, but then he read that damn message! Still, this was a good thing. After asking the system, he learned his physical transformation only increased his manliness by one point. The act of going to the gym every day got him the other point. Manliness was a stat that increased by doing things the system considered "Manly," and some of those activities needed to be done on a regular basis. As for a list of what those were, sorry. This system wasn't nice enough to give him such a thing.

    [Communication: 3 - You can speak]

    [Personal talent: 2 - Waste level]

    …While reading the status screen was as soul-crushing as ever, Ben still felt great about his growth. He saw the potential in the system because he gained 5 stat points in a week! If he kept gaining stat points at this rate, wouldn't he one day be strong, tall, and handsome like Batman? Even if he couldn't become tall, then at least Wolverine!

    As long as he survived this month, this system would be the key to his future! Besides the stats, Ben had other gains too.

    [Weekly Challenge: It's a numbers game - Open 100 women]

    [Reward: Stat Point(Random) x1]

    [Completion status: 87/100]

    Ben had been busy. Between school and working out, he went to crowded places in Manhattan and approached women to progress in the Weekly Challenge. He even had some results! Although they rejected him every time, he noticed that as the days progressed, the responses became not as bad. In the last couple of days, he even almost didn't receive slaps or drinks to the face!

    ...Not many slaps or drinks at all!

    ...Only a few times!

    Towards the end, one girl even laughed like it was a joke! When she realized Ben was serious, it became even weirder, but it was a good beginning!

    The reason for the better responses was obvious—his looks were improving. 'These girls only care about looks…' thought the man approaching women telling them he loved their tits.

    It was unfortunate that Ben hadn't unlocked any new achievements, but that wasn't something he could control.

    [PUA Points: 350]

    He had 350 points but still needed another 150 to use them.

    After reviewing his progress, Ben was pumped up. He decided to go to the gym. Even though his Multiplier had expired, he tasted the sweet gains and wanted more even if it took much longer. He also knew that getting fit didn't mean he would stay that way if he did nothing. A good body still needed maintenance. Besides, Ben's new fitness goals were still far away.

    Training was impossible for him before. Now, he enjoyed it. The thing with habits is they're hard to form but much easier to maintain once you go through the challenging early phase. Ben was lucky to have a Stat Growth Multiplier for that.

    Ben was in the gym training on a weight machine. He finished his set of exercises when he heard the laughter of several people at the entrance. He turned to see it was Tyler and one of his friends. They had dark bags under their eyes, taking unsteady steps as if half asleep. Ben could tell they had been partying and were hungover from the night before. In fact, there was a high chance they were only here to detox in the sauna. When Ben got a closer look at Tyler though, his eyebrows rose.

    Tyler wasn't any skinnier. No, he was even fatter! Since they made the bet, Ben hadn't seen Tyler in the gym even once and now knew why. It was freshman week. Every year at this time, the first year students had many parties, and it was clear Tyler had indulged too much.

    Ben glanced at Tyler's gut as he staggered around the gym like a zombie. Then Ben looked at his own muscular arms. He squeezed his biceps and realized that things were different now…He wasn't the weak one anymore!

    Ben smirked and walked over to Tyler, blocking his path as Tyler did to him last week. "Tyler, it's time to check the results…"

    This sudden intrusion surprised Tyler. He squinted at Ben. The hair looked a bit familiar, but he didn't recognize this short athletic guy. "Huh? Who're you?"

    "…Who am I?" It took Ben a few seconds to understand that Tyler didn't recognize him.

    Then, Ben's grin grew wider.

  11. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    10: A Japanese cutie with R.A. duty

    "What the f*ck did you just say?!?" Tyler grew furious. Some random guy was insulting him out of nowhere.

    "The truth is you were a mistake. Your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory!"

    Tyler's face turned red with embarrassment and anger.

    Ben might have been reserved, but he was damn good at cursing. Even the system praised his video game trash talking when it first described his communication stat. At least, that's how he saw it.

    Ben looked at Tyler's bulging stomach. "From the looks of it. You'll be needing another birth certificate."

    *Ptuu!* Tyler's friend spit out his Gatorade on some girl running on a nearby treadmill. He laughed uncontrollably and the scene descended into chaos!

    Tyler almost fumed from his ears! His arm shook as he pointed at Ben while searching for a comeback.

    Ben continued gazing at Tyler's mid-section. "Not pregnant? Then you'll be needing a girth certificate."

    *Bam!* A guy broke into laughter while sprinting on a treadmill and got flung off. Most of the gym-goers nearby exploded into laughter, staring at Tyler!

    Tyler couldn't hold back anymore! He lunged at Ben and swung a haymaker! Despite Ben not having fought in many years, he found it too easy to dodge this fat, slow, hungover slob. He was already short so he side-stepped it.

    Pulled by the momentum of his wild swing, Tyler stumbled forward until crashing headfirst into a rack of weights! One of the heavier weights fell onto his foot! "Ahhh!"

    Ben glanced at Tyler's friend who was still recovering from his laughter. He put his hands up in a nonchalant manner, showing no intention of joining the scuffle. It wasn't too surprising. Everyone here only knew each other for under two weeks so no one was close yet.

    Ben walked up to Tyler who was still on the ground holding his foot. "Tyler, say it. Who's your daddy?"

    Tyler glimpsed up at Ben. 'That hair…' At last, he realized Ben's identity. "It's you…"

    "Good answer."

    Tyler wanted to cough blood!

    Ben never expected Tyler to hold up his end of the bet. It was enough that he had an excuse to humiliate him. When people bullied Ben, he didn't stand up for himself in the past, but it wasn't because fighting scared him, but that he didn't see a way to win. With his recent physical changes and his system, he had weapons now. So why should he allow others to bully him?

    Feeling he had shamed Tyler enough, Ben went back to his dorm room. As he walked through the hallway of his floor, a door to the side opened, and a girl backed out of it carrying a stack of papers. She was in a rush. She didn't notice the silent Ben right outside her door. As a result, she bumped into him. The collision had knocked her documents out of her hand and scattered them in the air.

    As the papers floated in the hallway like clouds, the two of them locked eyes.

    Ben stopped breathing at that moment.

    Her clear eyes seemed focused and persistent, like they gazed at the future as much as the present. Her long black hair hung down her chest, blending into her professional dark skirt. High cheekbones accented her small pink lips, now forming an O from the surprise of the collision.

    When the documents reached the ground, they both snapped out of it. "Oh…" the girl cried as she began collecting the papers. Benjamin knelt down and helped her, stealing the occasional glance at this diligent beauty.

    She blinked for a few seconds as if recalling something, then looked up at him, "Benjamin Romero-san?" the girl asked in a sweet but restrained voice with what sounded to Ben like a Japanese accent

    Ben's eyebrows raised. "That's me."

    She followed up. "We haven't met yet. I'm your R.A. I came by your room several times, but your dormmate Fariq-san said you were at the gym or in class..."


    "Resident Assistant. I'm a grad student, but I get free-housing by working here to help undergrads with any issues. Every floor has one. I wanted to introduce myself. My name is Miyuki Saito." She held out her hand as she continued stacking the papers with the other, showing how much of a rush she was in.

    Ben shook her hand, noticing how polite she was. 'Now that I look at her, she seems a bit older, around early 20s…'

    "Oh…" Miyuki made that cute sound again as she remembered something. "I apologize for not tearing down those awful flyers faster."

    It took Ben a few seconds to realize that she must've been the one who took them all down when he first entered the dorm.

    Miyuki continued. "Although…I don't get it. 'Burrito king?' You look like you don't even eat burritos." She gazed at Ben's muscular arms as her cheeks became red.

    "Oh, that...that was a misunderstanding. It was...a Mexican delivery side-business I was trying." Ben said with a straight face. 'Who's to say it wasn't? Fariq thought so. Maybe she will too.'

    "Oh…side-business." She nodded her head.

    'Thank you Fariq, you angel!' Ben lucked out with his roommate.

    Miyuki stopped collecting her papers, realizing something. "Then…I ruined your business?" Her face turned pale, then she bowed. "Gomen-nasai!"

    Ben's eyes widened. He lifted her up by her exposed upper arms. Her face went from white to red in the blink of an eye. "It's nothing. You can buy me a drink." Ben didn't know where that came from. After getting into good shape and owning Tyler, his confidence was growing.

    "You cannot drink here Benjamin-san. It's not allowed. You are not 21. One of my duties here is to keep an eye out for underage drinking." She looked at him with a stern face like it was a life or death issue.

    "Not even sake?"

    "Not even sake, Benjamin-san." Miyuki looked down at her watch and realized how late she was running. She collected the rest of her papers. Then she said goodbye to Ben and ran to the elevator.

    Ben watched her leave. 'A Japanese cutie with R.A. duty…'

    Author's Note: Regarding Miyuki's use of Japanese honorifics in English, it's not my personal preference so much as her type of character. No, not every Japanese person in New York speaks like that, but many elderly and formal people do. The reason is English does not have corresponding translations for the various Japanese honorifics outside of Mr/Ms/Mrs. This is also how businessmen speak when speaking English to Japanese associates. In summary, Miyuki is a rather formal person from a proper Japanese family.
  12. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    11: Peacocking

    16 days to live.

    It was time to meet Beluga and Antonio again. Ben sat on a bench in Central Park as he waited for them to arrive. It was a beautiful afternoon with lots of people walking, exercising, or sitting on the grass. There were many women alone or in groups.

    Beluga came from the direction opposite to where Ben was sitting so Ben didn't see him when he came close, showing surprise when he arrived.

    Beluga was just as surprised to see Ben, but for a different reason. Ben had become much thinner! Beluga almost didn't recognize him. Beluga looked down at his big belly and then at Ben's. However, his reaction was the opposite of the normal person. He felt bad for Ben!

    In Beluga's head, big was beautiful! If Beluga lost that weight, maybe people wouldn't call him Beluga anymore. Maybe they would call him shrimp. He couldn't take that risk.

    Ben lost his natural advantage, but Beluga wouldn't rub salt in his wounds. "Sup?" Beluga greeted as he sat down next to Ben.

    Ben observed Beluga's Unique style. He still wore his signature purple pimp hat and sunglasses, but exchanged the robe for a purple jogging suit with white stripes. 'Is he Barney the dinosaur? Why does he only wear purple?' Ben wondered.

    "Hey. I've been meaning to ask you. I've noticed your clothes are a bit…unorthodox. What's with that?" Ben asked.

    Beluga turned to Ben. With his mouth hanging open, he slid his fingers along the brim of his hat and tipped it. "This righteous gear?"

    'Don't feed the troll,' Ben reminded himself as he stayed silent.

    "This is peacocking," Beluga said.


    "Yea, you've heard of the bird peacock? With the beautiful feathers? Those birds attract mates with their fancy feathers. The ones with the flashiest feathers get the most females. In pick up, we have a similar concept. Flashy clothes can attract attention from females. Many people will look at you which is good for your image. Females may even open you. At the very least, you'll have an extra conversation topic when they ask you about the clothes."

    Ben thought about it. 'That's interesting. Maybe I should try that.' Then he saw Antonio approaching from down the street. He was peacocking too.

    Antonio wore giant green feather shoulder pads that were bigger than his head. They extended out to his elbows from his blue polka dot jacket. This was peacocking to a whole new literal level.

    Ben gulped. 'I better stick with classic styles. You can't go wrong with those…'

    When Antonio arrived, Beluga looked at his outfit and nodded. People all around the park stared at them as the two showed looks of pride. This was the attention they were after.

    It didn't matter to them that most of those looks were of disgust.

    Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

    Ben tried to keep a poker face watching all this.

    Antonio wasn't too surprised to see Ben's improved body because Ben had warned him ahead of time. After some appetizing small talk, it was time to get to the main course.

    Beluga spoke to Ben. "All right. Last week was only a warm up. Those lines you used? That was just some crazy nonsense I told you to wipe out your fear of rejection. That's the first step. You need to be able to open a female in a calm manner without nervousness. Saying crazy things helps with that. Since you've already used such offensive lines, you should have an easier time using normal ones right?"

    Ben's eyes widened in understanding. 'I guess it makes sense that commenting on their tits wouldn't be the best opening line.'

    Ben learned something new every day.

    Beluga continued. "The biggest factor in opening isn't what you say, but how you say it, also known as tone and body language. You have to be calm, confident, and obey certain rules. Once you're good enough, you can use almost any opener as long as it isn't offensive. A simple 'How are you' can work as well as anything fancy."

    Ben listened in rapt attention.

    "We'll get to the specifics later. For now, let's start with a simple example. Antonio, go open a 2-set to show your cousin how it's done," Beluga stated.

    "2-set?" Ben questioned.

    "Set refers to a group. The number is how many people there are in it," Antonio answered. His eyes burned with anticipation. He looked around and spotted two girls sitting on a towel on the grass. Without hesitation, he approached them. Ben watched as Antonio opened these two complete strangers. He used some opener Ben couldn't hear but it seemed to go very well.

    At first, the girls' faces showed surprise. Then after a few exchanges, they loosened up and even asked Antonio questions. A minute later, he was sitting down on their towel laughing with them.

    "You see that?" Beluga asked.

    Ben's jaw hung down. His cousin was always a nerd like him before. He didn't know his cousin had this in him! That was amazing! He walked up to two girls, total strangers, and now it's like he's part of their group! The girls were now patting Antonio's shoulder feathers, giggling about how soft they were. Things were going great!

    "That's how you do it, watch and learn," Beluga said with a smile full of confidence in Antonio.

    Ben nodded. It seemed he could learn a lot from his cousin.


    A loud bird call erupted through the park. Ben, along with everyone nearby glanced in the direction of the noise.

    Ben saw Antonio flapping his arms like an eagle, laughing. *Squawk!* he cried as he made some kind of joke or impression. The two girls backed away with looks of terror. They picked up their things and ran away as fast as they could.

    Ben looked over to Beluga whose confident smile was frozen on his face. Ben couldn't view his eyes but he imagined they gave off an aura of wanting to die…

    After a long silence, Beluga said, "He's still got a lot to work on after the opening part…"

    Antonio sighed but shook it off and went back to Beluga and Ben. When he reached them he showed a proud face to Ben and asked, "You see that?"

    Ben stared at him. 'I don't know what I saw…'
  13. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    12: What is attraction?

    Beluga praised Antonio. "That was pretty good…Things got a little weird at the end there, but people don't judge stories only by their endings, right? Nice job!"

    'The ending is important though…' Ben thought.

    Beluga looked at Ben. "That's the power of peacocking. Did you see how those females were playing with Antonio's feathers? It was a conversation topic. The peacocking item also made him seem unique and interesting. Being attention-grabbing is important. All right. I'll show you another example myself."

    Beluga got up. Scanning around like an eagle, he identified three cute girls on the grass at the bottom of the hill where he stood. He adjusted his hat until it was at the perfect angle. Then, with a smirk radiating confidence, he walked on the grass towards his target. Each step contained a supreme swagger. There was a rhythm to his movements, like a bass beat from a catchy funk song oozing flavor and flash. Each forward motion built his momentum until he became unstoppable. That's when Beluga's eyes popped out.

    He looked down. His legs were now behind him as his face approached the grass.

    He'd tripped over a rock.

    The funk song became death metal!

    Julia was having a wonderful afternoon. She hadn't seen her two girlfriends in months. They were catching up and having a wonderful picnic when she heard a scream and looked to her right. A giant purple bowling ball of doom was rolling towards them at horrifying speed! "Aaahhhhh!" The three girls escaped like fleeing cattle!


    Beluga got up from the ground. He removed the bits of grass from his mouth and clothing as he looked around. Scattered sandwiches were strewn all over the beautiful picnic he had demolished. Shrugging, he picked up a sandwich and ate as he went back up the hill, resuming his swagger steps.

    The previous scene had stupefied Ben and Antonio. They stared with their jaws hanging down until Beluga made it back to their position.

    Beluga held his chin high. "You see that? That's how you get attention. The females even left me home-made sandwiches to show their appreciation."


    Next, it was Ben's turn. This time Beluga gave him a few normal lines. Ben also felt these lines had more potential. Eager, he got to work.

    Right away, he noticed a difference! Even though the women still rejected him, they were much more polite about it! At least, his face was still dry and slap-free!

    What was growth? This was growth!

    Even the tiniest improvements are exciting when you start at the absolute bottom!

    A few times, the responses were even lukewarm!

    Not cold like a slap in the face! Not piping hot like coffee! Lukewarm!

    Ben felt there was room to continue conversing. The problem was he had no idea what to say! As a result, those interactions ended with him stuttering or giving a blank stare.

    Ben returned to Beluga. "What do I say after the opener?"

    Beluga stroked his chinstrap beard. "The early phase is all about building attraction. That should be your focus."

    "Attraction?" Ben asked.

    Beluga clarified. "You need to attract a female before anything else. That's the first major hurdle. Only then would she be interested enough in you to consider something romantic. If a female isn't attracted, you'd be wasting your time, because the best-case scenario would be friendship."

    At the word friendship, Beluga and Antonio showed frightened faces. It was the dreaded friend zone!

    "What types of things affect and increase attraction?" Ben asked.

    Beluga answered. "The obvious ones are the more universal things like appearance, social status, and charm. Then there are specific factors, which some females may prefer over others, such as common hobbies, intelligence, how well-spoken you are, how manly you are, etc. The influence of the specific factors can vary depending on a female's type. The universal factors can also vary in a female's type, but not as much. For example, a male model will be attractive to the vast majority of females."

    Ben thought, 'Isn't he describing my system's stats? Appearance is looks. I'm guessing charm is the same as charisma. Then there's knowledge, manliness, etc.'

    Beluga spoke. "Think of it like this. Those previous attributes I mentioned set the foundation for attraction. When a female sees you at first, she'll discover some of those things on sight such as your appearance. Others she might only discover through speaking with you or others about you, such as your social status, intelligence, etc. When you add all the characteristics, it creates an attraction baseline. If your baseline is high enough, you will attract females right away!"

    He continued. "Why do men do things like go to the gym, get high-status jobs, become rich, and many other things? A big reason is to raise this attraction baseline with females! Even though making gains in these areas takes a long time, even us pick up artists recognize the value in developing them. Raising the baseline is important because it makes everything that follows easier. Of course, if attraction was fixed and only depended on those factors, then what would be the point of us pick up artists? Our specialization is the last part in attraction, and also the most important—seduction skills!"

    This hooked Ben's attention. "What are seduction skills?"

    Beluga smirked. "Seduction skills are ways to raise attraction in a short time! Even if your baseline was 0, with perfect seduction skills, you could skyrocket attraction to the peak! You could get any female you wanted!"

    Ben gasped. He'd only heard of such things in legends! Right then, he received a system alert.

    [User has unlocked Favorability system]

    [User has unlocked Favorability sub-system: Attraction]

    Ben squeezed his fists in excitement!
  14. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    13: Jokes and stat bumps

    Ben unlocked another system function!

    He asked the system and it explained the Attraction system would indicate the attraction level of a woman towards him when they spoke. 'Isn't this like an NPC favorability system in games?' His eyes shined! This excited him for several reasons!

    First, this favorability system would be very helpful! How useful was it for a clueless nerd to know how a girl felt about him? The answer was obvious! Second, he now knew that by learning more about being a pick up artist, his system would unlock more abilities!

    After calming down, Ben went back to listening to Beluga, who explained attraction further: "The reason seduction skills can raise attraction is that it isn't fixed, atraction is a perception! It can change inside a female's mind! Thus, by saying and doing various things, a pick up artist can raise attraction."

    Ben swallowed. "What kinds of things?"

    Beluga smirked. "To put it in obvious terms, you have to do things females find attractive. There are hundreds of different techniques. Let's start with the basic layer of building attraction through speech, which is communicating attractive qualities about yourself that aren't clear on sight. That may include accomplishments, interesting stories, and things that show your high value. So Ben, tell me. What are some attractive things you've done?"

    Ben was deep in thought for a full minute...Then, he had it. "15-game win streak in Rocket League?"

    "...We'll skip that. The entire section, we're skipping it. I'll ask you again in the distant future. You'll have to work on it, but it's okay…" Beluga assured him.

    "That is pretty amazing though." At least the fellow nerd Antonio was impressed.

    "Alright, how about this…" Beluga said. "Ben, do you know any good jokes?"

    Ben's face became full of confidence as he nodded and smiled. As an internet Otaku for so many years, how could he not know excellent jokes? He knew the best jokes!

    It was his time to shine. Ben saw a single girl sitting and reading a book nearby. He approached her.

    "Excuse me miss…"

    "Yes?" she responded.

    "Is that the new Harry Potter?" Ben asked in a curious tone. This was one of the new openers Beluga gave Ben, to ask a basic question about an item of the girl's such as a book, a phone, a strange piece of clothing, etc. It was a simple opener to break the ice and was strong in its flexibility; You could adjust it to many situations.

    [Target's current attraction level: indifferent]

    Above her head, the system produced a small pop-up screen visible to Ben only. It displayed on its own without Ben having to request it.

    As she responded to Ben, he prepared his follow-up joke.

    Antonio and Beluga watched on in support and anticipation.

    When the woman started cursing Ben…the anticipation disappeared, but they still supported him!

    When the shoe flew at Ben's head and bounced off…their support also withered, sprouting shock in its place.

    Ben walked back to Antonio and Beluga with a new bump on his head.

    Antonio questioned Ben, "What Joke did you use?"

    "Your momma's so fat—"

    "Stop!" Beluga realized he should've been more specific about the jokes. "Try ones that aren't insulting." Then Beluga gave Ben a joke to try on another woman.

    Speaking with the last girl, Ben had watched her attraction level change from indifferent to disinclined, and then to disgusted. The system explained to him the attraction levels from worst to best: [mortal enemy-disgusted-disinclined-indifferent-curious-interested-attracted-fangirl]. So far, Ben had started at indifferent, which he reasoned was because of his average 5 in looks.

    Armed with better material, he spotted another woman and tried again. He opened her in a similar way to the last one, but when it came time to tell the joke, he stuttered because he wasn't used to telling it, and it failed.

    Ben returned in disappointment when something happened that brightened his mood.

    [Congratulations! You've completed the Weekly Challenge: It's a numbers game - Open 100 women]

    [Completion status: 100/100]

    [Distributing reward: Stat Point(Random) x1]

    [Assigning Stat: Communication + 1]

    [Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Junior Opener(common) - Open 100 women]

    [Distributing reward: PUA Points + 100]

    Ben was ecstatic! Not only did he finish the weekly challenge, but there was even a hidden achievement for the same accomplishment—two for the price of one! Even though he only had 450 points and needed 50 more to get a Low Level Mystery Box, he was still excited! He browsed the next Weekly Challenge.

    [Weekly Challenge: Handful of digits - Acquire phone numbers from 3 women who are interested in you]

    [Reward: Stat Point(Random) x1]

    [Completion status: 0/3]

    After reading the challenge, he took the description to mean the attraction levels of the 3 women had to be at least interested. He assumed it was to stop him from finding loopholes. As far as seeking loopholes, Ben didn't bother wasting time doing so. He still remembered when this shameless system told him no slam donkeys and no pay-pigging when he had only thought of some possibilities.

    Ben's communication stat went up from 3 to 4. Unlike looks, this wasn't a stat where he could notice the difference in a mirror. He was anxious to see if the higher stat would change the results of his approaches so he searched for a new target right away. After selecting one, he took a deep breath and stepped forward.

    It was time to see what his new communication stat could do.
  15. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    14: Teasing

    When he spoke to the woman, Ben noticed a difference right away. The words flowed from his mouth like water, his voice sounded smoother, and even his body felt more comfortable!

    As Ben delivered the opener and the joke, the woman responded well. She giggled!

    [Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Curiosity Killed the Cat(common) - Make one woman curious]

    [Distributing reward: PUA Points + 100]

    There was nothing better than points! Ben didn't even mind the system's vague insult in the achievement title! He had enough to buy a Mystery Box, but he'd save that for later. Now, he needed to focus on the present opportunity.

    If he could raise this girl's attraction level to interested, then he might get her phone number!

    Ben persisted in chatting with the girl for a few minutes, but the mood only turned awkward. Despite the higher communication stat, he was still too lacking in experience and conversation topics. After some time, she excused herself and walked away, leaving Ben standing there frustrated.

    He shook his head. 'It's fine. This is already a massive improvement.' He returned to Antonio and Beluga. They also observed that Ben had done much better and encouraged him.

    Ben described to Beluga how well the joke went, but he needed more material to raise attraction.

    Beluga said, "The best jokes are situation specific. Not only will they be the most relevant, but they'll display your intelligence in adapting to the situation. Females will pick up on that and become more attracted...I could give you a fish, but it's better to teach you how to fish. So rather than hand you a jokebook, I recommend you try inventing teasing-style jokes on the spot to build attraction."

    "Teasing?" Ben questioned. He understood the word's general meaning, but not the specifics of doing it.

    Beluga answered, "Teasing is making a lighthearted joke targetting the female. You choose some item or attribute of hers: clothing, an accessory, a tattoo, something about her body or hair...Then you make a joke about that, poking fun at her in a subtle way."

    "Hmmm...I understand. I'll give it a try," Ben said. Despite his inexperience, he discovered the boost in communication improved his creative thinking ability. That made it easier to generate conversation ideas. He amped himself up to give it a go.

    Ben approached a woman stretching after a jog.

    'Body part,' he reminded himself.

    "Hey beer belly!"

    As Ben walked back, Beluga and Antonio shook their heads hard. Ben knew it was no good. He moved to a new girl to try again.

    'Clothing item,' he said to himself.

    "What's up clown shoes!"

    He dodged a water bottle. 'Ok…That didn't work either…That's all right. Third time's a charm.' Ben found a new target.

    'Let's try a different accessory.' He adjusted his material.

    "I like your Racoon hat!"

    He hiked back with his new hickey--the red slap mark on his face. "That was her hair?!? Who could tell?!? Why is nothing working!" Ben screamed at the heavens.

    [Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Watch Your Back(common) - Make one woman a mortal enemy]

    [Distributing reward: PUA Points + 100]

    'I even got points for that?' Ben glanced back at that woman he just spoke to. Her strange brown hipster haircut framed her eyes, as they spat a venomous glare at him. Behind the malice...Ben only saw more malice, and the desire for devilry.

    He jogged back to Beluga and Antonio, glimpsing over his shoulder every so often to confirm he wasn't tracked.

    Upon Ben's return, Beluga gazed at him with newfound respect. He didn't know if this kid would ever make it as a pick up artist, but he was a damn prodigy at cursing and offending people. This was a talent!

    Beluga explained to Ben where he went wrong. "You're doing too much. The point of teasing is to be playful and charming, not insulting. There's a spectrum between boring and abusive. Choose something the target won't be sensitive to. The teasing should be funny, which helps loosen things up."

    He continued, "Your body language is also important for easing the tension. Enter with a relaxed joking tone and a light smirk so they know you're playing around...Ok, let's try something a little different. Approach some females and think of a famous person they have a vague resemblance to. Open them by jokingly asking them if they're that person.

    "...Ok, I can do that," Ben replied. He spotted another woman gazing at a lake in the distance.

    As he got closer to her, he went over the plan. 'Famous person…I Got it. Don't forget the light smirk.'

    Ben was a quick learner. His body language and tone aligned in perfect harmony. He remembered to speak with a carefree, playful attitude. He did everything Beluga said. It was perfect. "Are you Hitler?"

    Ben rationalized it to Beluga. "Her short hair looked like Hitler's though!"

    "He committed genocide! No homicidal maniacs for f*ck's sake! Pick someone with no crimes against humanity!" Beluga yelled.

    Ben reflected and brainstormed. "What about aural genocide? Is Miley Cyrus out?"

    You can read more chapters here: My Pick Up Artist System - Webnovel
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2020
  16. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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    15: Otaku religion

    'This is harder than I thought.' Ben sighed. 'All right...I can do this. Let's go again.'

    He scanned the horizon, discovering an intriguing girl with bright pink hair in the distance. She was standing next to a flower garden, laughing at something on her phone.

    Ben thought, 'Pink hair? That's too easy. I'll ask her if she's the stripper from that movie.'

    'No damn it! That's offensive! Something else...'

    Ben pondered for a while but no one else sprang to mind. Then he thought of something. 'Wait…would that work? Beluga said famous person…I don't know if characters would qualify?'

    His idea was strange. He wasn't sure if it would fly. In fact, he expected it to probably crash and burn. 'Would she even know who that is?' After considering it for a few seconds, he sighed. 'Whatever, I'll just try it. I'm not getting any better ideas anyway.'

    Ben went over to the girl. As he got closer, he noticed two things. First, on her pale skin, she had an almost star-shaped birthmark under her left eye. Rather than making her unattractive, it added a unique charm. Second, she was super sexy!

    Her long pink hair stretched down to her waist, curving around her large D cup breasts, which popped out even more when contrasting with her narrow waist. A skin-tight black top displayed her smooth stomach, accented with a butterfly piercing at her belly.

    Ben gulped. 'This is a long shot, but I'll never know until I try!' He walked up to the girl and launched the stupid line he was sure would bomb.

    "Hey, are you Sakura from Naruto?"

    He delivered the line with the proper playful tone but was still pessimistic. Ben predicted she would glance at him like he was crazy or say no and walk away. At best, she wouldn't understand who Sakura was and ask for clarification. The prognosis wasn't good, but this world had no shortage of medical miracles.


    Ben's face froze. 'Did she just burst into laughter?'

    "Haha. I wish!" The girl said.

    [Target's current attraction level: interested]

    [Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Passing Interest(common) - Make one woman interested]

    [Distributing reward: PUA Points + 100]

    'Another 100 points!' The achievement shocked Ben but he tried to keep a straight face. It seemed this girl not only didn't walk away, but her attraction level jumped right to interested! Was she an anime fan?

    Ben realized, 'This must be what Ben meant by type. If this girl is an anime fan, then me using such an unusual opener about a subject she likes must've created this amazing result!'

    It made sense that some openers could lead to leaping attraction levels. Not long ago, he cliff dived from indifferent to mortal enemy on a raccoon-head.

    The girl interrupted Ben's thoughts. "Do you like anime?"

    Ben hesitated. It was an unwritten rule among Otakus and superheroes that you never reveal your true identity, especially to a cute girl. 'No. I can't play this one by the book...I need to take a chance!'

    "…That's right." He risked it all!

    The girl stared at him. After a long time, she smiled and extended her hand. "I'm Katie, please ta' meetcha!"

    'Yes!' Ben tossed the Otaku bible in the garbage and it worked! He wouldn't be bound by mortal rules anymore! Hail Satan!

    Ben shook her hand and offered his name. 'Now what?' He was lucky that he didn't have to decide.

    After he admitted to liking anime, Katie began an endless rant. She talked about the recent animes she's watched, her favorite characters, and scenes. She didn't even give Ben a chance to speak. The dark side offered many benefits!

    Ben only nodded the entire time. After a while, when Katie was out of breath, Ben's instincts told him the moment had arrived and he took a stab with his devil-forked tongue. "Katie, I have to go, but can we exchange numbers and talk later?" Ben's tone was relaxed but his heart was thumping!

    She was silent for a few seconds, considering it…

    "Alright. Give me your number," Katie said.

    'Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, I'll die in 16 days!' Ben knew better than to give his number to a girl. He was thankful that Beluga already gave him the perfect line for this occasion.

    "I don't pick up calls from unknown numbers, so put your contact in first." Ben took out his phone and put it in her hand to input her number. To Ben, the line sounded like something a drug dealer would say, but according to Beluga, women liked that!

    After he said it, Katie's eyes flashed. Then, she put her number in the phone without further hesitation!

    'It worked!' Ben was dancing in his mind! Morpheus Beluga was right! He began to see the Matrix!

    There was one last step left. He still remembered what Beluga said: 'These females are sneaky. Sometimes they give fake numbers. Be sure to call it and see her phone ring before you leave…' It's not weird. This is called double-checking, ok! Even NASA does it!

    Even though something sounded off, Ben couldn't afford to care about it. He pressed call on her contact...When her phone lit up, Ben knew he succeeded!

    [Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: If You Throw Enough Sh*t at the Wall, Some is Bound to Stick(common) - Acquire a phone number from 1 woman who is interested in you]

    [Distributing reward: PUA Points + 100]

    He gained another 100 points and now had 850! His weekly challenge also progressed! As for that brutal burn of an achievement name, Ben didn't care! The system was like a beauty with a bad temper; He would put up with her as long as she kept giving him benefits!

    Ben saw the chance to live! If he kept going at this rate, maybe he could really complete the life and death mission…No! He'd already given up his Otaku religion! He'd do it no matter what!

    You can read more chapters here: My Pick Up Artist System - Webnovel
  17. samsarawithwords

    samsarawithwords Active Member

    Jul 21, 2020
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  18. redleaf97

    redleaf97 Lurker

    Feb 13, 2016
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    How big is the harem? I'll delete my text later