Question Please read my attempt on translation of the novel.

Discussion in 'Translator's Corner' started by RedIska, Jan 31, 2021.

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Is it an okay-ish translation?

  1. Yes.

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  2. No.

    0 vote(s)
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  3. Grammar is bad.

    50.0%
  4. Translation is too inaccurate.

    0 vote(s)
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  1. RedIska

    RedIska Well-Known Member

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    Good day, Everyone! I tried to edit the MTL from DeepL, but then just translated by hand. Is result any good?

    Edit: It's not that I don't see the obvious errors or ways to make the wording better, but I decided to post it as it's right now. Sorry to put y'all through this.
     

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  2. Astaroth

    Astaroth empty

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    It's definitely readable.

    As for what's good and not, tbh I struggle with defining that myself so can't say. But it's better than most of the "edited" MTL passed off as translations.


    I didn't check the raws too much because 1) I'm not some great translator myself and 2) for some reason a lot of the characters became empty boxes when I copied them & popup dictionary didn't work on PDF.


    I did notice you skipped on some details though (which is good sometimes, bad other times), for seemingly no reason.

    e.g. in, "Chen Guoguo put down the chopsticks, and struck a smile towards middle-aged women on the other
    side", besides the grammatical errors (woman instead of women), it should say on the other side of the (dining) table.

    Like I said, many times you don't want to translate things literally and some stuff are just useless details, but I don't see any reason to remove table from this sentence.

    e.g. of a good exclusion, in the same sentence, it says Chen Guoguo held the chopsticks in her hand(s), but that's not really necessary to point out.


    Also, something else you did which is typical of 'edited' MTL is that Chen Guoguo's username changed. At times it was Miao at other times it was Meow.

    Not sure if that was you or the the machine translator that translated the same thing inconsistently, but that's one of the really annoying and obvious things when reading MTL.

    Someone's name obviously shouldn't constantly change.
     
    Last edited: Jan 31, 2021
  3. RedIska

    RedIska Well-Known Member

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    I translated by hand. I noticed that I translated Miao into Meow in the end of the chapter much too late and missed one when doing the initial edit.
    About the table.
    From raw I understood that situation played out in a kitchen or living room, with owners who were clearly pragmatic so it could only be an ordinary table, which felt redundant enough to not mention. I was clearly wrong, and will write it more clearly next time.

    Thanks for feedback.