@Prolux Although I'm a man, I think any sex/gender could give his/her 2 cents about the situation. Well, I'll be Captain Obvious. IMO, the "oh lol" and then the "haha ok" were where everything went wrong. I'm not saying it's your fault. As we can see in this chat, you couldn't know and you did everything that seems the most diplomatic. After all, written communication has its flaws. You cannot see the reaction of others, you can guess at most if you don't know the people u are discussing with.The gal (I assume they are one) seems the kind to overthink/shoot her own movie about a situation whenever something happens and she's at fault. However, you can also see the thing like this: her last answer seems a sort of means to, well, exit the awkward moment due to her misunderstanding after your explanation. As in "sorry, I understand the situation, stop digging your own grave and my grave as well, it's an awkward moment. You should stop this discussion here and consider it as it never occured." But well, she seems really very touchy because of her overreaction: after all, she said that you were a jerk making a dick move although you seems to me willing to let the thing slide and consider she was joking with the haha ok. I think it was somehow a natural reaction. For me, if I were in your shoes, the jerk seems to come from nowhere. So as Har D Ray said, you should leave the chat and don't let his conversation bother you too much. I hope I was clear, English is'nt my mother tongue.
Please do not judge them based on one conversation they had with someone else. I know I would certainly feel hurt if someone posted my conversation for the world to see and had people comment on it as if they knew me (even anon as I would certainly know. Not that I'm blaming this person for posting this as he is confused and just looking for answers). Besides that, this seems like a one off thing. She stated that she hadn't played in awhile and was most likely self-conscious. Perhaps she thought he would automatically be angry with her when she told him she hadn't remembered. It is quite obvious he just wondered what the Oh meant, but to her it could have read as being upset that she didn't remember. Later she probably realised her mistake and that is when she wanted to end the conversation instead of explaining herself by going around in circles and embarassing herself more. Although this is a hypothesis based on my opinions and personal experiences.
Anra7777 also pointed it out, there are too much Lol. I haven't paid enough attention but the lol after saying she was shy seemed like a mocking tone. Then the oh lol and the haha ok reinforced this impression. Then, at the end, she didn't seemed convinced and tried to end the discussion, I think, partly because of the awkward situation. So forget what I said previously.
Basically, like a fool, you pushed her out of her comfort zone and being passive-aggressively pushing her to explain herself when you could have just left it at sorry and move on. "who you were too shy to talk too" is so passive-aggressive in pushing the fault at her like bro what kind of person says that to someones face normal people would say "we didn't talk to each other that much" besides the two of you "met" in a game. Do you really think a girl would put her guard down in the toxic gamer community? You weren't memorable to her and she felt bad about it but you had to go and be a passive aggressive male that went and said "who you were too shy to talk too" like dude read a book on how to start and make conversations to human beings before you talk to the opposite sex.
Oh, I forgot about this actually... @Prolux I don't know how you approached her to begin with, but you could read the messages you sent in the screenshots at the beginning as an attempt to slide into flirting with her. Especially the part where you bring up her being shy - creepy men really read into things like that and blow them way out of proportion. On such cases, the short and sharp replies were probably trying to get you to go away. She was waving a huge "not interested, leave now" flag. Honestly, I'd do the same. Some men get really bitchy about the slightest rejection, so she possibly thought you were the one getting touchy. There's an entire Twitter dedicated to men doing that crap, called SheRatesDogs. Very useful if you want to learn how not to talk to women.
If you decide to apologize: Do not say sorry I guess? Like it is a question, it comes across a as sarcastic and insincere, while can talk like that in person in text it just sounds like you are mocking her especially after pointing out that she was shy.
I actually said if in there for a reason. It basically means if she gets really offended this easily then just better to withdraw from this situation because it's more likely that they'll just keep on unintentionally offending each other as this guy seemed a bit on the oblivious side. It's probably for the better for both of them to put it bluntly
Yeah, it occurred to me that the “shyness” might really be code for her not wanting to talk to the OP in first place, but I thought I’d give him the benefit of the doubt that it was really shyness.... which still would not be cool to being up...
to me it seems from the start you two were not going to have the 100% best covo. you seem like a very nice person and really outgoing. she is most likely not. so the more easygoing you try to be the more annoyed she will feel. tho sum it up you two had two different energies, yours overwelmed hers and she became defensive. This is how i see it though. sorry if it does not make sense. if you run into someone with low energy and you start with high energy just tone it down a little. you can still be you and lattr when you two know each other better gust go back to high energy bit by bit. again sorry if it does not make sense. not sure how to explain. hope the rest of your day was good.
Very good insight. As a man who didn't played a lot on LoL, I haven't paid enough attention on this aspect of the specter. I think you resolved all this puzzling puzzle. Take this mindset (which is justified in this context), add the misunderstanding part and the "shoo shoo, leave now" with a pinch of the "awkward moment + stop digging the pit" and the story is complete. Thanks Moonpearl, Sherlock of the day (there isn't any sarcasm here).
Not really passive aggressive, that just herself and her friend were joking about it in the chat last time about how she, herself, was too shy to talk to me in VC like her friend Heartlace was.
The "im back btw" is after i left the group to go do something, then i sent her a msg saying i was back and ready to play again.
Sorry, I did not catch the if. Yeah, if I were her I'd avoid him as much as possible due to misunderstandings. Although, if they start a conversation naturally it might overturn this awkward one-timer. I've found myself getting over awkward encounters naturally if I encounter the other person in a non-forced situation and begin talking. This usually happens with other people being there as well and also participating in the discussion. So it might work out? Just don't force anything lol xD.
Hm... Okay, that does make that less likely. If you were group chatting, does that mean that the two of you had already been talking that day? You weren't contacting her again after a long period of time?