A tragic happening in a beloved character's life? I somehow manage power on through the attack of the onion-cutting ninjas. Humour that makes one laugh their head off? I can keep my head well enough to continue reading. A highly anticipated moment culminating in a gratifying development? I read on with what feels like a permanent grin plastered on my face. But vicarious embarassment can make me unable to carry on. I, like many do, project myself into characters and that combined with my fear of embarassing myself in front of others, makes secondhand embarrassment the hardest emotion to deal with. Funnily enough, it isn't so bad IRL. Yes, there are times I wish the floor would open up and swallow me. But the Earth doesn't stop revolving and that awkward moment passes. Upon recollection, that memory may bring some embarrassment, but life goes on. It's inevitable. But when reading, I am the one turning the pages, I am the one who gets to decide whether to move on to the next panel, paragraph or page, but sometimes I am so paralyzed with mortification those simple actions- a click or a roll of the mouse wheel- become a herculean task. Because I'm deeply flustered and, even more, afraid, of the possibility of further secondhand embarrassment if I proceed. I usually do get back to reading after a break, having steeled myself to face whatever cringe gets thrown my way. Not like that can spare me the blushes, tho...
Can read with a straight face. Besides, there are hardly any NTR stories that engage me deeply enough to be able to share the characters' emotions. And even if they did, I would think it's a good thing they discovered their SO's infidelity so that they can quickly get rid of them. I confess I haven't watched that particular anime. Actually, I hardly watch anime these days.
Same here. This is exactly why it is hard for me to enjoy most romance or harem anime/manga/LNs (Male Protagonist) because the main character is soooo cringe sometimes. I don't really wanna relive middle school again, it was bad enough the first time lol. On top of that, WHY DO THEY ALWAYS HAVE TO STUTTER?! I get the author's trying to portray nervousness but stuttering is not that common (not to mention painful to read) and there are tons of other ways to demonstrate nervousness. It ends up being kind of funny that the protagonist can easily talk in complete sentences in front of the most terrifying monster, but throw them in front of their archnemesis, a girl, and their tongue malfunctions.
Me too man. I kinda like just stop my reading steel my nerves and then come back to reading saying some mantra in my mind
You made me remember some romcom (don't recall the name) with such a pathetic, cringe-inducing protag that I, who was feeling mortified on his behalf, simply couldn't continue watching that train-wreck and had to drop it. Tho, in my case, I believe it's usually female protags that cause more secondhand embarrassment. Yes, it sometimes gets too much, doesn't it? You really have no choice other than to stop and regain composure. Think internal blushing. I'm not really how it shows itself on my face.
Me too! I stop reading and try to encourage myself, that it's all right, I can do it, as if I'm going off to war! Sometimes I skip to another part of the chapter and slowly go back in reverse. Sometimes I take a few quick looks then give up. Sometimes I decide to read that chapter when the next chapter arrives. The problem is that I don't only have that problem with the awful second hand embarrassment jokes, but with a lot of emotional moments. When the character is in a situation I personally can not endure, I feel super embarrassed in their stead. I'm a super secretive person irl, it's really hard for me to honestly talk about my feelings. So when the MC or others do smth bold and openly talk about sensitive and/or emotional topics, I can't read it. Even though it's not really smth embarrassing. But I just wouldn't be able to do it and to deal with the situation thus I feel like things are going very wrong and it stresses me out. It's incredibly annoying.
I get anxiety for the characters instead so I hate reading very obvious foreshadowing of terrible events that lead to their ruin. One novel was completely ruined for me because the author mentioned one of the side characters reading the MC’s fortune and lying to her. Apparently, her family were doomed to die no matter what even though she changed their original fates. The author went on to say that MC needed to overcome this terrible tribulation to level up. It felt awful and contrived.
Same for me. For me it depends on the delivery, the tone of the story, the character's personality, the audience and the setting. If it's a shameless character who won't feel embarrassed, I might not feel it either. If the character manages to laugh it off, I might not feel as bad. OTOH, if it happens to a painfully shy character, someone with social anxiety, who hasn't any mechanisms for coping with embarrassment, then I can feel their embarrassment to my very bones; it's intense, like a punch to the gut. And yes, some super frank/blunt characters talk sensitive issues without batting an eye, leaving the bashful reader, with lower tolerance, squirming in their stead. Has also happened to me b4. I'm not sure if it's the same, but sometimes I get anxious when someone the protag trusts is foreshadowed to have some ulterior motive while the MC remains seemingly unawares. It can be close friend, a system the MC relies on, the MC's master- anyone really, as long as they they have wicked designs and are in a position close enough to back stab the MC. This feeling also appears when there r a lot of uncertainties concerning the protag's future or when the MC has already stepped into a well laid trap. The worst is when the MC's life is in someone's hands or when they have been robbed of all independence. I know being the MC they will eventually get away from others' control, but the anxiety, in the form of a feeling of dread, still persists. At times like these, I wish like I could fast forward till it all gets settled.
Watching movies/tv shows at home I would often pause at embarrassing scenes and remind myself this is not actually happening to me.
I agree, it depends. I get it when the tone is very serious, and the moment dramatic. Like that violin manga where *spoiler* the german guy confessed that he was the MC's half-brother in an already tense situation.
Exactly! You took the words right out of my mouth. That kind of atmosphere amplifies the embarrassment; in fact, it was this kind of situation, recently encountered in a manga, which prompted me to make this thread in the first place. And I am ashamed to say I still haven't gone back to reading it.