The Best Part of NU.

Discussion in 'Novel General' started by otaku31, Jun 1, 2021.

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  1. otaku31

    otaku31 Well-Known Member

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    I'm talking about the reviews— not those perfectly objective, comprehensive, and seemingly credible ones, nor those spoiler-filled ones, though I'm not going to deny their usefulness. No, I'm speaking of those rife with wit and irony, oftentimes exaggerated but with the ultimate aim to delight. Scorn seems to bring out the best in reviewers as personal tragedy does in poets.

    Now they may not be the best reviews from the perspective of a potential reader as they tend to refer to the novel more tangentially than in detail, comically embellishing certain fallacies and building a narrative around them than focusing on all aspects of the novel. But they do call out ridiculous aspects of the novels they criticize, be it the allusion to fast-food nature of CNs (review here), the underdog's journey of Herculean Oedipal proportions to the top (review here), the art of rehashing the same hackneyed stuff in an incredibly creative assortment of words (review here) or the love for his country that comes to every C-author as naturally as the air he breathes.
    I want you to imagine something. Imagine this with me.

    The time is not too long ago. Maybe it's the 40s, or the 60s. You are a rural farmer in China. You don't know how to read or write, you only know the Glory of China. You father farmed here, and his father before him. All for the Glory of China. You lead a simple life, with your wife and kids. You grow crops and give them to the Mayor of the town to sell them at the next town over.


    Every few days everyone in the village gathers in the Mayor's house to sit before an image of a person. Everyone cries with joy and worships this image. It is the Great and Glorious Supreme Noble Leader. The leader of Glorious China! Everyone cries and exclaims with joy about how great their lives are, how great the Glory of China is. Sure your aunt died last week due to cancer, but you're just a farmer. You don't even know what cancer is. All you know is that she spent her life working for the Glory of China! How noble!


    Every few months some soldiers come by. They are so glorious! For the Glory of China! When they come, all the young women of the town don't come home at night. You're not sure why. The day after, all the women are crying and in pain, but no one can be bothered to talk about why. You just look down on them. Women are filthy creatures after all. They need to always work towards the Glory of China!


    Nine months after the this visit, new kids are born. How Glorious! More children to work for the Glory of China! You are so proud to be a farmer. Soon your daughter will be of marrying age and will be able to continue your humble peasant family line. Though you've noticed many of the soldiers look at her already. You are very pleased to know that your ancestors have worked for China, you work for China, and even your children and their children will work. All for the Glory of China!


    Now imagine this mentality, except in the modern age. This is the mentality of the author of this story. And oh my fucking god is it hilarious and cringe-inducing. I'm only on chapter 14 and the story itself isn't actually bad. Just be prepared for an incredible amount of propaganda. Propaganda for the Glory of China!


    It's like this author genuinely believes that communism is the greatest thing ever and corruption simply doesn't exist. Everything he describes in the story for how society works is exactly like the farmer. If the story keeps like this, I'm gonna keep reading it 'cause it's just too funny

    This thread was inspired by @sleib's reviews thread (I did not recieve any kickbacks from him, I swear) and the many such threads that preceded his', and my recent (re)reading of @Slants Perpendicular's reviews; the man has a way with words!

    While they may not necessarily be the reviews you should read if you are seriously deciding whether to pick up a novel, they are definitely the ones you should read if you, like me, are tired of most of the novels here, and want to switch to a new reading or entertainment source; they certainly seem to possess far more originality and creativity than many of the novels they criticize. Ciao!
     
    Last edited: Jun 1, 2021
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  2. UndyingSLIME10295

    UndyingSLIME10295 [•Figment of your Imagination•]

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    Explain it to me in less then 20 words
     
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  3. otaku31

    otaku31 Well-Known Member

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    I'll do it in just four: Click on the links. :blobpeek:
     
  4. UndyingSLIME10295

    UndyingSLIME10295 [•Figment of your Imagination•]

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    Which one???:sweating_profusely::sweating_profusely:
     
  5. otaku31

    otaku31 Well-Known Member

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    All.
     
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  6. Professional_lurker

    Professional_lurker [Pro gacha gamer]

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    I suggest the fast-food one. That review always manages to crack me up :blob_grin::blob_grin:
     
  7. UndyingSLIME10295

    UndyingSLIME10295 [•Figment of your Imagination•]

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    F
     
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  8. Ddraig

    Ddraig Frostfire Dragon|Retired lurker|FFF|Loved by RNG

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    Will you click on the links and read them or do you want this lovely Oneesan of yours to take a nice look at the wonderful set of guts you have? *wields knife*
     
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  9. UndyingSLIME10295

    UndyingSLIME10295 [•Figment of your Imagination•]

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    Oneesan, I choose you!!!!
     
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  10. schnellyjohn

    schnellyjohn Active Member

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    Yes! Some of the stories I’ve read have much better writing in their reviews, my favorite example being from “The General’s Little Peasant Wife”.
    The reviewer explains the MC’s actions using the example of a fly, and it works amazingly well!
    MC is reading a book in a small room, enjoying the silence.


    Suddenly there is a random fly buzzing around.


    Too lazy to bother to kill it, the MC instead says:


    "Stop annoying me before I get angry"


    Of course the fly doesn't understand it and won't stop


    Seeing that her gaze turns cold:


    "I warn you, you will not be able to handle the consequences of offending me. "


    For a moment the fly stops. Seeing that she is satisfied. But then the fly, that was just resting for a moment, starts buzzing around again, even louder than before.


    " Don't tell me that I didn't warn you. " she says in a cold voice as she stands up. After locating the fly she suddenly raises her arm and swoops it, causing the fly to spiral out of control and dissappear.


    Having restored the peace in her room, she sits down and starts reading.


    But after an hour of peace, it is once again disturbed by the familiar buzzing.


    "Dare to offend me again and again, it seems like you are tired of living" her voice laced with some killing intent that even the insect with its limited intelligence could tell was danger. But then it noticed a pastry on the table and the fear was quickly forgotten as it's mind was filled with greed.


    Yet before it could take a bite, it was caught by a pair of slender fingers.


    "You have had your chances, this is the result you have brought upon urself! "


    All she wanted was to read a book in peace, those that dare to distrupt it again and again, don't dare to later come complain that she is merciless!


    With that in mind she threw the fly outside into a mud pool.


    Yet on the next day the fly was back, with another, bigger fly following it...
     
  11. Ddraig

    Ddraig Frostfire Dragon|Retired lurker|FFF|Loved by RNG

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    Ara Ara, we have a willing participant here. How lovely ~
    *Makes a clean cut across the stomach*
    Now let's wait for you to bleed. If you have any last wishes, this Oneesan will hear them ~. And dont worry, I will make sure to preserve those beautiful, ripe, red gut of yours once you die :blobcatblush:.
     
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  12. UndyingSLIME10295

    UndyingSLIME10295 [•Figment of your Imagination•]

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    I'm a slime... I don't have guts...:facepalm:
     
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  13. otaku31

    otaku31 Well-Known Member

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    Yet you have the guts to go under the knife... :hmm:

    What am I doing, hijacking my own thread like this... :sweating_profusely:
     
  14. UndyingSLIME10295

    UndyingSLIME10295 [•Figment of your Imagination•]

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    Kekeke
     
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  15. Ddraig

    Ddraig Frostfire Dragon|Retired lurker|FFF|Loved by RNG

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    No you naughty boy, you definitely do. *pinches the gut* See? they are just too clear and blood soaked right now for you to notice. This Oneesan of yours is never wrong when it comes to guts ~
     
  16. UndyingSLIME10295

    UndyingSLIME10295 [•Figment of your Imagination•]

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    *Stare* Why do I feel like something's wrong but I just can't put my finger on it....
     
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  17. Halcyon Observer

    Halcyon Observer Full stop

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    Some might even say this sense is called a "gut feeling."
     
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  18. Bowie

    Bowie Well-Known Member

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    the best part of nuf is knowing that you have money.
    the best part of nuf is the money
    or what they call
    n u f f i e s
     
  19. UndyingSLIME10295

    UndyingSLIME10295 [•Figment of your Imagination•]

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    Uhh, I don't have guts...*Shiver*
     
  20. Mysticant

    Mysticant Active Member

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    I do love those snarky reviews when they point out how these authors just keep dragging their stories way beyond their expiry date or give illogical reasons/quantification just because it is "fiction" and how some people are just fine with drinking expired milk (sorry lactose intolerant people) or sewage water. This post made me go back and read Invisible Dragon again to cleanse my heart of all the filth that I have wasted my time on. As a wise man once said, " If you have read Invisible Dragon, you would have read most novels out there. "

    On a side note as much as I agree with the ISSTH fastfood example, I feel ISSTH was not that bad since all I ever was going to get from that is to scam the heavens, and it sure scammed the heavens sufficiently to my personal liking. Every other number, power level, heroine or young master/mistress out there is just to fulfill the roll of elevating the protagonist like 99% of the other novels out there.
     
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