Discussion What's the Most Hurtful Thing a Friend Did To You

I decided to give this a try since some are willing to talk their personal experiences here.

For me, it happened recently. And everytime I remember it, I only feel disappointment in myself. All of my friends say that I shouldn't just blame myself alone though but I can't help it. I really feel like it's only my fault.

3rd year college is basically hell because we had 2 baby thesis to make and finish in the 1st semester alone and we have to begin preparing for our 'main thesis' by next semester. In one baby thesis, we need to form groups of three. In the other, we can form up to 4.

There are 7 of us in my circle of friends. Two of my closest friends (let's call them A & B) and I decided to form the group of three in the 1st one and letter C will join us for the second baby thesis.

That's where it started.

That year, I was basically the mom of our household since both of my parents are out all day, working. And as the eldest, I was given the responsibility to take care of all the households (well we do have routines, but the majority falls on me). I wake up at dawn and prepares the meal of the whole family for breakfast and lunch. When I go home, I cook our dinner and do the laundry, including the hanging and sometimes folding of clothes when my siblings are unreliable to do it. I wash the dishes and clean the house too.

I was tired doing all of that and yet ofc I still know my duties at school. Heck, I was basically studying for free because of my scholarship so I cannot lose it.

I told ALL of my friends REPEATEDLY what I am dealing with at our home and all I ask is that they do their share for the baby thesis.

The funny thing is only letter C, D, E and F seems to remember it and letter A and B don't

I was also the leader of both the baby thesis because no choice, we haven't decided who will actually be the leader but all the teachers addressed me as the one so we went along with it. For the matter, letter A is also the same as me. In fact she graduated as Suma Cum Laude while I graduated as Cum Laude.

Anyway, I gave them parts of what should they do and I divided the work equally as much as I could if I do say so myself. Majority of the work fall on me not because I am someone who can't trust other people, but because letter A doesn't have a laptop and internet connection of her own and while letter B have those, he has the brain of a 5 year old most of the time and I sometimes wonder how he is a college student. So I considered all of their circumstances and I trusted them that despite all that, they will do their part.

But why did I get? NONE. They didn't do a single thing.

The night before the 1st checking of baby thesis, I checked on their progress only to find THEY DID NOTHING. I just finished our laundry then and I was disappointed but I told myself that it was fine. I told them it was okay and I'll make it somehow. So yeah, I pulled an all nighter and went to school without an ounce of sleep. We manage to pass the 1st checking so it was fine, it was okay, I understand their circumsctances.

But it happened repeatedly. Letter A says she really can't do anything because she have no laptop and wifi. Letter B said he can't do anything because he doesn't understand. As their leader, ofc I explained to them what they can't understand and I even let them borrow my laptop at school and I bring it everyday just so they could do some work! The only relief I have is tht on our 2nd baby thesis I have letter C which I can rely on.

The 2nd, 3rd and 4th checking passed on a similar manner and I told myself to understand them. But I was tired of their excuses so I distanced myself from them and they noticed ofc... BUT THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY I WAS ANGRY WITH THEM.

5th checking came and I pulled another all nighter. I was doing some finishing touches when our group was called but at the same time, my seatmate chatted me up so I didn't hear. By the time I turned back to what I was doing, I found my laptop gone and letter A and B are right in front of the teacher with said laptop. The teacher asked them something and they paused, they couldn't answer. Letter A turned to me and letter B even had the gall to fetch me. But I didn't come with him and instead answered the teacher from my seat. The teacher suddenly looked at me with pity and gave back my laptop himself. He said, "You can go." So I did, I grabbed my things and walked out.

I found myself bawling my eyes out at our canteen.

After that I asked the same teacher if he could be a moderator because I really can't keep going like this. We need to talk if we want to finish these 2 baby thesis. Luckily he agreed and so letter C and I cornered letter A and B because the two of us alone are really struggling.

At our talk, letter A and B said they were amgry with me because I started to ignore them for NO REASON. Their words, not mine. They don't know why I was doing it! They said I was even isolating them from the rest of the class which is BULL. I don't even have the energy to talk lively with our classmates anymore! And I was so pained that I started crying why I told them whyyyyy. I told them I was tired and I can't do the 1st baby thesis alone and let letter C and I finish the 2nd one.

So we talked. Laid out our grieviances. Next week, letter A's mother finally bought her a laptop so it was smooth sailing since then. I practically stuck letter B by my side to ensure he'll do his own share and just so I could help him when he's struggling.

I thought that was the end of it.

Later, concerned classmates of mine approached me saying that letter A had been saying some things about me on twitter. AND HECK I DON'T HAVE TWITTER SO WHAT SHOULD I DO? Naturally I borrowed letter C's account-- she rarely used it-- and we both checked it out to find out that yeah, it was true.

Letter A had been saying how she was doing fine academically but emotionally she wasn't because of me. According to her, I isolated her, left her alone with no one to talk to and she often cry because it was 'thanks to her, I finally know what it feels like to be alone and it was okay.' And I am.... and a lot of her fellow cosers and artist friends are symphatising with her and telling it was 'that bitch of a friend,' meaning ME, fault.

And yeah, I guess I did start ignoring her and letter B but it's not like she doesn't have anyone else to talk to? She and letter B were practically joint in the hip those days and we have other friends inside and outside our circle???? And I never caused her to be isolated in class??? Like whaaaaat, I'm struggling on my own end how could I even bother to prepare a scheme like that But yeah, maybe I just haven't realized the impact of what had I done to her... still I think it's unfair that she painted me to be some sort of villain... also because of that I started to think that yes, it was my fault alone...

I thought after our talk that it was okay and that it'll go back to normal. I was wrong. I was naive. We never did go back to normal.

Thank you for reading this until the end! If you did, anyway.

Feel free to share your own experiences and I'll read them all too!!!!~~~

 

A friend should bear his friend's infirmities, But Brutus (replace with yourself) makes mine greater than they are- is basically what A and B are on about. Too bad "bearing infirmities" isn't equal to allowing yourself to be exploited. *shakes head*

 

Honestly, from what you told us, Letter A acted like a green tea b*tch and most likely, your classmates realized it and must have been isolating her on their own. She didn't have anywhere to vent because people that know her IRL must be aware she was being useless so she turned to the web. Her lack of self-awareness when even the professor realized you were in a bad situation is unnerving. We should hire a water army to flood her twitter acc

 

That's not a friend at all, that's parasites. Ignore them and move on with your life, from what i assume they become friend with you out of convenience (same college, meet with each other almost everyday) that makes them your acquaintance not friends...
None of this is your fault, being in college age means you need some assurance( don't know if this the right word, not native speaker) from your friend by being together,you feels a bit insecure if you're alone in college age, its like herd theory, people want to connect with each other because they feel safe that way.
I know this because i felt the same way when i was in college, new environment, new acquaintance, and although not as extreme as what they did to you, some 'friends' of mine do that kind of thing too. Well, they're strangers now, so no prob.
No worries, with a new perspective as you grow older you'll accept things like this better later, again, NONE of this is your fault.

 

Oh wow sorry to hear this.
I really hate those who "confide" to others their grievances to another friend. Why cant they talk it out directly between themselves? Sigh..

Anyway, mine is when a friend suddenly ignored us (there's three of us) for more than a year. You know why? Its because friend A asked friend B to go out but she cant make it because of work so friend A invited me instead as I am coincidently off work.

And so we went out and when this friend B found out she ignored us for over a year. We didnt know why she's ignoring until she decided to talk to us and said that she felt left out because of that incident.

Me and friend A were like wtf??!

Anyway, so we let that incident passed but another recent thing happened. Friend A said something tactless to friend B and so friend B decided to ignore us again.

I got real angry this 2nd time. She ignored us for a month or so this time. I confronted her and we managed to sort it out but there's something in our friendship that changed.

 

Fuck friend A.

One time, a ex-friend of mine knew that I was interested in a girl but he kept poking fun at me because she wasnt what everyone would call a conventional beauty. To me she looked like a fucking goddess so when he had called her disrespectful things I just lashed out at him and tell him it wasnt cool to say that shit.

A couple days later the girl walks up to me and says that I'm probably on e of the most disgusting people shes ever known.

Turns out that my ex-friend had lied and told her that I was talking shit behind her back and had been saying things like she should kill her self and other such things.

The day ended with me punching said ex-friend in the face and him breaking one of my fingers. The girl knows thaty I ddidnt say those things but she still wont talk to me to this very day.

Its a real bruh moment considering how much I liked her.

Dont be a douche and be a horrid friend, ok?

 

Funny thing is, something kinda similiar happen in my class
But the leader confront the baggage who talk on the internet..
It's about the event that our year(?) student have to held reponsibility on
So some people do nothing but talk sheat on the internet and group chat..
Several days after the event, leader and the sub-leader, share it in front of the class about people who talk sheat
And ofc it happen with some drama and tears
Does it resolve all the problem after they ask for an apology tho..??
Nope, some people ostracize them and kinda ignore them...
So for several semester there's like some rift in our class...
Super awkward....

 

Well, I can't say whether mine is as hurtful as some of the ones i read here, but it's kind of like a trauma for me. I was a kid at that time, maybe 5-6 and I had a fight with a guy, who, mind you, should have been at least twice my age at that time, and then he decreed that nobody should talk to me, nobody should play with me and the like, isolating me completely in the neighborhood, for about, 6 month to a year, I don't remember much about that.
Then, I became socially reclusive, and even now, 14 years later, I can't talk properly to others, make may friends, and my friend list never seems to go beyond 2 or 3, of which it feels like some aren't even friends, as I don't have much in common with them, we don't talk much, it feels like more than acquaintances and less than friends.
But, it's not all bad, at that time, I was also angry, I flung a brick and almost broke the leg of one guy who was that guy friend when they were playing, and I almost made that guy who isolated me deaf, although I too would have been beaten had I not ran as fast as I could, and some other fights, but it was fine. Point is, you should vent if you feel frustrated, no point in cursing yourselves, and no point feeling that others would hurt you more than they already have.

 

Well, sucks to be them. If I had a friend as good as you, I would never give you up.

The idiot B brought A down to his level... how sad. Or the A was just a natural born idiot and couldn't show it.

You know, it's funny, because from all that they did to defame you and make you evil, they are proving to themselves what they will never be. More than funny it's pitiful, but I like to laugh at idiots like A and B.

You can safely ignore whatever A and B say about you. As for other people's opinion of you, while being viewed in a positive light is helpful, those that get to know you will know what A and B said was bullshit.

You have the right to feel angry, you have every right to feel wronged and hurt. They do not have that right.

And since they fed you poison, you don't need to consider them as humans. Think of them as kind animals, those dogs that you pass by and want to pat and hug but eventually ignore because you have stuff to do and places to be.

 

I have to ask, how did you become friends with a jerk like that in the first place? I hate when people push their responsibilities on others and never look at the circumstances objectively, choosing to only blame someone else. That’s why I try to pick my friends carefully, since I never want to have a friend who disregards my own feelings, since I would never do that to them.

Thankfully, I have made my choice of friends pretty well in the past. I usually got along well with the ones I considered to be the closest to me, and we were friends for years. Not a small number of years either: almost 12 years. But I guess someone changed in that time without my knowledge.

Friend A, who was the person I considered one of the most important people in my life, shared a lot of interests with me. Both of us loved to read, loved to watch anime, loved to draw, even had pretty similar tastes in food. However, if I was honest, between the two of us, I was the smarter one. I got straight A’s during school, my projects were always approved, I was always on honor roll and everyone who knew me practically had praises on their tongues for my intelligence. And my manners. And even my family, who are a bunch of small geniuses. Wow, I got praised a lot, you’re probably thinking that. Of course, I was proud of it, but I never showed it.

The reason? My family, who were a bunch of geniuses. Whenever I got home and compared myself to my siblings, I felt like crying in shame. I could never face my brother, who was the most awesome, with any pride nor could I praise him out of the jealousy in my heart. But I still love him a lot, he’s my favorite sibling, it was just that my pride had been crushed around him.

Back to my Friend A. I wasn’t proud, but I wasn’t especially humble either. Hanging around me for so many years, I could tell that Friend A was having her self-esteem crushed by me. I had no idea what to do. I felt horrible, and I tried to compliment her and support her as much as possible, but it didn’t seem to work. Friend B, who was a good friend if both of us and pretty smart too, though not pride-crushing smart, told me that my praises sounded fake and weren’t helping. I gasped at her.

“Then what am I supposed to do?!!”

I was completely clueless. I was sometimes exaggerating when I praised Friend A, sometimes even outright lying, but I had no idea how I was supposed to deal with the situation. I tried to do stuff for her instead, to help her study to get better grades, to show her how important she was to me, but nothing really worked. I asked for advice from my mom once I didn’t know what else I could possibly do, and she told me: “Why are you trying so hard? It’s obvious she just doesn’t want to be your friend.”

Well, I, hot-blooded as I was, could not accept that. I got really angry and tried to explain to my mother how long we’d been friends, and that this was just a momentary thing. Something I didn’t realize was that the time we had gotten to know each other was in 1st grade. 1st grade, when children don’t even feel the need to compare every single detail. Eventually though, I cooled down. I was too tired at this point to keep talking, and my mind began to work properly.

I decided: I would talk directly with her. And boy, did that cause drama. I’m sure me and her were the talk of the school for quite some time. I won’t list details, but here was what happened:

I talked to her after school, beginning with the fact that I considered her as my best friend, and that she was really important to me. I told her that I hoped she didn’t think that I was ever trying to flex on her, or that I was using her as a way to boost my ego.

Her response was a bit unexpected-she burst into tears. I tried to calm her down and say I’m sorry (though I didn’t know for what), and tried to hug her. Not the best response to that though. She slapped me, and told me to go f*ck off and take my smart *ss into hell, and that all is ever done for her was to make sure that everyone looked down on her. She said much more, but I couldn’t even get a word in. I was dumbfounded, but that wasn’t the worst of it.

The next day, I tried to meet with her again, seeing she’d blocked my number, but who did I find? Friend B. Friend B told that I was a piece of garbage, who couldn’t even care about her friend properly and took me to the counselor’s office where Friend A was. I’m not even going into what happened there. The counselor could tell it wasn’t really my fault, so I didn’t get into much trouble.

After that though, I lost all my friends. Not two, all of them. See, I only kept close to a couple people, and I was always pretty busy, so maybe I never noticed, but all of them sympathized with Friend A.

To this day, I don’t know what I did wrong. I really cared for my friends, and I was heartbroken to know how she felt for me and that no one else believed me. It really hurt me a lot, to the point where I flunked a major test. That actually got me going: I might not have had anymore friends, but I did have my family, who cared for my situation a lot. And flunking a test made me mad, made me feel like I had put too much into my feelings. It got me so frustrated, that I put all my heart and soul into studying. Eventually though, I calmed down. I made a few new friends. Everything worked out well. But my heart still sometimes hurts because of the friendship I cared so much for disappearing just because of jealousy. I don’t know why my good intentions were constantly being misinterpreted, but I don’t care anymore. I have good new friends, and thankfully they all don’t seem to mind my achievements. I also don’t get what made everyone sympathize with Friend A, but I won’t think anymore about it. I did my best to stay with her, but it didn’t work.

Well, lesson learned. I won’t try so hard next time. Sorry for not listening, Mom.

 

*yawns*

You are an impractical leader, no offence.

Idk what interpersonal relation problems your team had, work is work, you should've made them understand atleast after the second time, letting drag on till breaking point is a mistake on your part.

As for that twitter shit. It's twitter, people who got attention problems seek asylum there (and any social platforms) don't let it get to your head.




Ps- when we had group thesis, we divided our work, fixed a date and hitched a cafe.. ( A should do his job Z should also do her job, if she doesn't then we kick that one out and do her/his part for that time and forget bringing her back.... Ofcourse they'll still be our 'friends' hanging and laughing around).

 

hmm.... Well, everyone has their share of faults. You : need to be more indifferent. if they can't do their share of work repeatedly, just kick them out.
And how did you just accept A excuse for not working hard repeatedly? Don't do that next time. if she really want to finish her work, she can find other way. like hand writing or phone.

Friend B, you can care to most people but don't make yourself their slave. you should think twice next time.

friend A (twitter part), doesn't need to really think of people like that. she just want an attention. The more attention you give her, you yourself the one who will suffer in the end.

Well, you can still talk to them if you really like that type of friend. But to trust them, you must really think twice.
i hope your life will be filled with worthy friends

 

Most hurtful thing? If anyone has a friend named @Ai chan, that is the most painful thing.

 

Does anybody else feel like a little giggle?

Well at the whole story...Well, no offense but you seem to be one of those leaders who have the position but zero authority. I don't know the exact term. Then again in your case, everything supposed to be done via escalations towards the higher authorities I was familiar with such people, and the only way to deal with them is the authority. In certain circumstances, you are allowed to shift the deadline too.

Also, I am curious how you got such friends though...I mean judging by the characters it could not be a newly found thing if you were really friends with them.

 

Ah.. that thing do happens. and sometimes we're just in no position to oust them...

Hmm... friend A has a handphone, right? She could open twitter! There's plenty of apps that allows you to write in a phone. Heck, google docs and ppt works wonder even on a low-spec phone. It's just a matter of will. So if they're butthurt over what you've said, just ignore them. People will complain over the smallest inconvinence, and this "sharing over internet" culture makes it worse. Pity them, since if they're gonna still be like that when they work, it'll be their end.
If you're concerned about your relationship with others because this friend A's might damage your reputation, just spread this griveance of yours by gossip.
As for friend B, i got no comment. If they tried hard, then they might still be salvagable. Effort, at the very least, is always appreciated

But yeah, maybe you should up your leadership game, although it was understandable considering your circumstances at that time . People might find you an easy mark if this goes on..

Spoiler: Story time! an intern story : epic failure

Once upon a time when i was still in uni, i got on an internship on a certain super prestigious place along with a group of acquintances. I've met some people from other uni, but my alma mater was automatically assigned to different groups for a project (and somehow all being the leader of their respective groups). The group consisted of 5 people, and because of my uni, i automatically got nominated as a leader. I was not used to leading, and ended up almost doing everything by myself because : (a) 2 members simply did not do any work, and, (b) two others do try, but they...have a hard time to understand the materials and wrote pages of mistakes.

One evening before the presentation, one member who almost did 0 work said that the central thesis is questionable. The barely-there-mentor agreed and asked us to change EVERYTHING in just one night. I was a bit taken aback because the amount of research that i've spent on that topic is HUGE, and it's just impossible to change it all on a single night.
So i pulled an all-nighter, activating my "Queen of Heart : Work or Off with Your Head" mode and called all of the group member and forced them to work. Sadly, i only managed to rouse 3 other members from their bed.

Neverthless, we managed to finished it in time and i repeatedly try to ensure all members that did not really work to at least read the damned papers. Each members, in turns, repeatedly assured me that they have read it. I thought that with a stake this high, they wouldn't be stupid and embarass themselves.

So this project presentation was attended by several super high level officers of my intern place; heck, you could say of the national government. Many of them are also my seniors, and my uni has a tight-knit fraternity--my reputation and chance of work in the circle would suffer if i fail . I offer to go first because, at least our group's lack of preparation wouldn't be too obvious and we could just read from the presentation.

Turns out, one of the member lied to me. They haven't read a thing .

When the presentation started, one of the member who insisted on talking keeps talking about the wrong term and giving the wrong explanation, whereas
the PPT displayed the correct words and explanation and everybody in the room could read it. I was frozen for a minute or two because of that, and by the time i recovered enough to take charge, it has been ruined. One of my uni acquintance even took the photo of my horrified, flabbergasted expression as a memento .
My seniors smile and shake their head. Some walk out from the room .

After that presentation, i excuse myself for that day, chatted up with some of my seniors on my way down the buikding (and receive their reprimand), and go to a friend's home and bawled my eyes out.

After that, i've learned to never be that...polite and passive anymore when leading. Better to show the whip right from the start or you will suffer.. And i wouldn't want some fools' laziness and incompetence to ruin me, thank you.

Some people just lacks common sense

The end.

 

(_　_|||) I guess I did allow myself to be exploited by being 'understanding' to their situation but it isn't really in me - at that time perhaps, I was just really tired with life- to put up a fight or deal with them more aggressively? With more dominance? But oh well, yeah I get your point T___T

I was surprised too. But I was really thinking that maybe that's how I really appeared to her by suddenly abandoning her. And yes, I am suspicious that perhaps the whole class realized it too since we were tight knit before and then boom! Also yes, that professor of mine is really sharp like that! A lot of students opens up to him because it's like he knows what you are going through in an instant! Like a mind reader! But I guess having a Master's Degree in Clinical Psychology helps too

Yes, I am trying to move on from that It's one of the reasons I dared to open this up in a platform like this since I was hoping it'll help me. Like it's been months since then but I still feel hurt and sad whenever we don't message each other or interact anymore. Thanks though, I'll try to apply that mindset!

 

I once did an art project that I thought I did very well on, and it took quite a while as well. However, my friend, who did not do as well, said that I did not deserve my 100, that my art was rushed and I was a slacker.
https://printsbery.com/planner-templates/daily-schedule

 

Wow, I don't think I really have some right to say this but that was one immature friend and one easily offended at that. And yeah, some relationships once there was a gap or a crack can never be really be the same way again even if you talked it out That's what I learned from my experience anyway...

*pats you in the back* Wow, I admire the leader and they confronted the perpetrators. It's good that it's handled that way. We don't have a class leader or anything see but if we have a responsible one like that... yeah, things might have turned out the same way it did yours haha~

Ouch shucks, that is the absolute worst! How sure are you that he doesn't like the same girl and was feeling threatened by you? But argh, I feel angry in your behalf. That friend basically ruined your potential happiness.

 

I kinda have the same circumstances as you but this guy was just plain idiot.

Well, we were a 3 man team working on the thesis and since we had a short time since we were only given half a year's time to work on it, naturally we would work harder on the thesis.

Well, while the two of us(me and the the Smart person on the team, gonna call him Smarts) was using our times to not only work on two thesis(since one was for a real thesis and the other was for a subject), but me and Smarts had another to work on for some other subject. We rarely have any breaks and even make some of our rest time to plan for our thesis.

Idiot(the third guy) was naturally talking with his friends and not even listening to our discussion while even had the gall to play games on a computer, while we literally worked on some subjects and even the thesis.

Luckily for him, we were almost done and we just need some few modifications where Smarts only have to modify while i not only research some data but also teach Idiot about literally what our thesis was about.

Both of us didn't want him to fail the subject and Smarts task me to inform him what our thesis was about and we even held meetings to help adjust the thesis and even learn what we should do before we defend.

But.... Idiot not only was missing from our meetings, i even saw him talking with some freshmens while i was going to the bathroom. He even had the galls to say when was the meeting when i literally texted him on Messenger just in case he forgot.

Then, when the defend had started and you know what he did? Stood there like the idiot he was. We had to cover for him and i even grit my teeth since i might have nervous breakdown whenever i stood too long in front of people.

Yeah, while Idiot just stood there, i already practice some questions the instructors were to say so i won't be nervous but since i had to cover for him, i get a minus because i slipped up some question due to my nervousness.

After we finished defending and gave advices for our final defense, i could feel my hands sweating from fear due to almost having a nervous breakdown. He just walked out with a smile and while i was smiling, i would literally kill him since he had the gall to congratulate us that all of us did our best.

Both me and Smarts decided that we can forgive him since we both aren't keen on being hated but it was the last straw when he didn't attend to some of our few meetings.

Smarts decided to ask the our advisor to kicked him out and since we might fail our final defense if Idiot were to continue his actions and dragged us out, i agreed with him and all of us were gathered at his office.

The advisor gave a hard scolding to idiot and even gave me some since from the last meeting where i began to miss some of the simple questions(i could have answered it but i get too nervous whenever i stood too long at the spotlight). The advisor decided to kick Idiot out from the group and he reluctantly agreed.

We tried to gave him some chances such as having to pay for some fees for the advisor's snacks or even having to pay printing fees yet he decided to retake the subject and left the group.

We felt bad for Idiot since naturally, Smarts and I didn't want to be hated but he was gonna dragged us with him with his actions and Smarts decided to kick him out since it was the best solution and we were almost gonna graduate that time. We already too many things to work with such as us having 4 subjects with activities to work with and i was even gonna take some summer classes just so that i can clear the subjects i lacked. We didn't have time to help Idiot.

After we were done, i received a message from idiot about 'Its not your fault' and i almost felt bad until he started spamming which i decided to ignore him.

Naturally, Me and Smarts had finished our subjects and i took summer classes to make up the subjects i lacked and i tend to see him hanging out with some freshmen while glaring at me but i ignored him.

As to why we were partnered with him, our teach naturally wants us to pass the subject and since the thesis was planned to be finished in half a year(she gave explaination and this was just an experimental plan for future references for the new students) and decided to partner up students with smart and idiot so all of her class would pass. We thought we draw the good idiot since the other went to my brother's side and having to deal with some classmates who gonna be absent, i sometimes naturally help him out since he would have too much work to do and might be stress out from overworking himself.

 

That was a classic big kid bully with egomaniac problems early on! It sucks that you experienced this early on- just on the age when we were suppossed to learn how to be social and play no less- and it affected you (_　_|||) but you know how to fight back! And at least you have acquintances now, if you want to, i hope you can learn how to be unbridled in making friends and discover that while almost everyone sucks one way or another (yes, this is the bitter side of me speaking), there are some people who are really treasures too ~

This... this... brought tears to me eyes. I guess I needed this kind of words... thank you so much ╥﹏╥ whenever i think about it- unintentionally most of the time- I really just feel a lot of regrets and self- blame...

Oh, you see... I kinda adopted them, I guess? Friend A and B had been loners for the first few months of 1st year classes you see... in our group, letter D was actually my longest friend, letter E, F and C are kinda drifters but they stayed with me and D more than the rest of the class... and since letter A and B have been just sitting alone there for months near us... I finally approached them and we all clicked so much that we hang out all the time~ letter A is actully one of the most beautiful girls in our class and gives off this moe feeling and letter B is actually energetic and lively but I never really know why they can't make friends those few months...

This may sound inappropriate but I guess yours was one of the cases that 'mere/ normal humans cannot grasp what's going on with the mind of geniuses.' I can see your effort and that actually hit me so hard! Because I've been through that! After I learned of letter A's tweets I also refused to believe that that was the end of our friendship, and I thought, we talked right? Wasn't that enough? So I also made an effort to pursue her like talking about the animes and novels we have both interest in, making her lunch, helping her in our main thesis (we're not groupmates anymore in this one yet because I still want to be friends with her, I sometimes help her because letter B isn't really reliable and I pity her because she now knows how I feel last semester) and even helping her with all the documents needed for school.... but yeah, it was pretty obvious that she's keeping me at arm's length since that talk and she never replied to any of my messages enthusiastically anymore... I guess that there are really times where and to whom we put our efforts into are the thing/one that will actually bring us down and it is simply never meant to be

Also that failure thingy? Dang, I actually almost lost my scholarship because of failing grades too because I was too invested emotionally in this issue, and if it wasn't for my desparate effort in the later part of the sem I think I wouldn't even be qualified to graduate with a Latin Honour anymore.