Would you read it? (Story Idea trial)

Discussion in 'Author Discussions' started by Osamaru, Aug 22, 2019.

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  1. Osamaru

    Osamaru 『Shem's Best Pal ✧ Lexi's Ani ✧ Hamster's Keeper』

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    A World of Ashes
    Destiny, Glory, "Victory", Broken, Betrayal, Revival, REVENGE!, rUiN, Ashes.....

    Johnathan was a Hero of his world. Respected, revered, his song sung in every tongue in the world. Children spoke his name and "Hero" with the same meaning. Playwrights turn his story into master pieces. Bards and Authors deified him.
    Yet, that Story was based on a Lie. The Truth would break him. Shatter the "Hero's" heart and souls. And when he was at his lowest and weakest, it would be the hand closest to him that dealt the final blow.
    His mind broken, and all he ever believed in stolen from him, Johnathan swore Revenge. The world had taken everything, so he would do the same.
    Thus the "Hero" became a Demon. Uncaring. Unmerciful. Unstoppable.

    So the world Burned. Burned until all that was left was Ashes and weeping.

    Then, from atop his throne of ash and bone, the Demon that was once a Hero, felt the radiant smile slip from his face. He looked around the ash covered world, forged by his own hands, and for the first time is longer than he could remember, the Madness receded and a single thought crossed his mind.

    "What have I done?"
     
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  2. Novela

    Novela Immortal Sheep

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    So it's taking the plot of hero turned demon king *.*)
    I would read it if it was litrpg maybe '.') Though does sound interesting but what about your other story osamaru!
     
  3. Osamaru

    Osamaru 『Shem's Best Pal ✧ Lexi's Ani ✧ Hamster's Keeper』

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    More the AFTERMATH of that kind of story.
    *whistles*
     
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  4. Novela

    Novela Immortal Sheep

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    Kk though still that kind of plot '3')
     
  5. lighterxx

    lighterxx Hoshi stan before a human °^°)

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    ..i will read it if you dont name him jonathan :blobhero:
     
  6. Femme Fatale

    Femme Fatale | Sublime Goddess Of Chance |

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    Depends on how he emerges and what he does next. :)
     
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  7. clmbheat

    clmbheat Well-Known Member

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    Would you finish it? If you are not capable or it becomes difficult for you to finish your story then no. Sometimes I beat my self up for starting Novels here that get dropped or places on hiatus. So if you are going to finish it then I would.
     
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  8. Milanin

    Milanin [Reader] [???] [Freeloader]

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    You burned a whole world to a planet sized charcoal. That's what.

    Also, what the heck would the story continue as?
    The hero turned demon being the lone survivor on the clump of charcoal that used to be call a world?
    What's the reason for anything having survived if all he did was burn it all?

    All you've given is pretty much a bad ending for the entire world including the hero.

    So without any additional information other than the bad end:
    No, I wouldn't read it.

    It wasn't actually all turned to ashes? Then what the hell is he surprised about, he just lit the world on fire around himself until the horizon, wiping out at least one city or country. Nothing too interesting there, he'd just be a face that people could recognise even if he left to somewhere else if his name is so popular.

    Did he actually become human when he was a demon? Did he turn to dust the demon world that had kidnapped him when he was a child? Who knows.
     
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  9. Osamaru

    Osamaru 『Shem's Best Pal ✧ Lexi's Ani ✧ Hamster's Keeper』

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    lol, ashes is Metaphorical.
     
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  10. SquadCammander354

    SquadCammander354 〖Stormy's Better Bro〗『Lord of Storms』『The Expert』

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    Yeah, just don't make it edgy.
     
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  11. Milanin

    Milanin [Reader] [???] [Freeloader]

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    ... That's quite a Metaphorical
     
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  12. Kalto

    Kalto [Somewhat meticulous]

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    Keep his name and make it into a JoJo fanfiction (like a parallel world or something) :hmm:
     
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  13. lighterxx

    lighterxx Hoshi stan before a human °^°)

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    JoJo the demon world destroyer :blobmelt:
     
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  14. SquadCammander354

    SquadCammander354 〖Stormy's Better Bro〗『Lord of Storms』『The Expert』

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    Give him long or short hair, none of those generic hair styles.
     
  15. Kalto

    Kalto [Somewhat meticulous]

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    And everything would be Dio's plan
     
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  16. kyoshijiro

    kyoshijiro [Draugr] [Oniric Lord] [Disaster of a human being]

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    What will he even do? Mope around regretting his actions? Try rebuilding? Will the survivors know who he is? Are the only survivors his subordinates? How destroyed is the world? Is it survivable? Trees? Animals? How powerful is this guy to have brought the apocalypse? And how did "the world" screw him?
     
  17. SquadCammander354

    SquadCammander354 〖Stormy's Better Bro〗『Lord of Storms』『The Expert』

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    It'll probably have him time travel back into his younger self.
     
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  18. kyoshijiro

    kyoshijiro [Draugr] [Oniric Lord] [Disaster of a human being]

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    But then the story isn't about the aftermath but about resolving regrets
     
  19. Silver Snake

    Silver Snake Out of Order|Rain & Reason|Lonely Light

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    You got style, but the premise is too vague to interest me.
     
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  20. DiabolicGod

    DiabolicGod Well-known lazy Member

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    Give him this haircut:
    [​IMG]
    and also the face