How many people did you friend zone?

Yeah. In my case, I just got tired of avoiding that person and I was like " whatever, if he wants to continue this friendship, let him. I refuse to always feel bad and make others feel awkward every time"

 

I friendzoned my dog

 

Oh.. Did he loved you? What a bad guy...

Why did you have to avoid him? Because of his feelings ? Do you still consider him as your friend?

Hm, but, isn't there a difference in concepts? Is love more than friendship or is friendship less than love? Or are those two different things?

This discussion reminds me of this video:

Spoiler: Video

 

you still need the answer?

for my victims are 2
n im victim from 3

 

Rather than friendzoning someone, oftentimes it was me being friendzoned....
Based on the vote, I'm not the only one....

Ah like the 4 type of love? agápe, éros, philía, and storgē?

 

Friendship is a relationship where there is a mutual understanding and respect between two people it is not less than or greater than love. TBH love is not limited to just a BF/GF relationship but can be said to be a caring relationship in which both parties are able to truly care for and make sacrifices to be with the significant other. Anything other than this is lust.

 

First off, I did say I didn't friend zone anyone, right? I can only reply to what happened afterwards, as in break up and were we friends?

Spoiler

Horrible? Well, I didn't really like her (or them). I just thought maybe I'll find something likeable in her? And so, with hopeful wishes, I just kind of proceeded. I did try my best, mind you. But I just simply found out they were quite nasty. As for how they are nasty, I just don't really want to write a wall of text here. Plus, to be honest, I don't remember all the details too well as it's a while ago. And when you don't remember it perfectly, you start to make up things to fill in the void. And I don't want to make assumptions that might make it worse than it actually is. You can just go assume relationship go sour and didn't end well.

One tried to be "friends" again. That didn't work. It supposed have been a nasty end. But I kind of just blurred it out at the time and was like sure, we'll be friends. A year later, any nice feelings I had disappeared and I kind of just remembered the horrible times. Kind of like when you gamble, it's easier to remember how many times you lost than how many times you won, unless it's like a jackpot or something.

I'm just one of those idiots that get blurred by emotions. So while we're together or after I break up, we'll be on good terms. But not so much afterwards, as I don't feel the same for me.

I do believe I might've been friend zoned once? Not entirely sure that's possible as I just wanted to be the bestest friend with her as she's a really awesome person. I do admit, at one point or another, I liked her in another way but not very long. I like her as my best friend more than whatever. Though, I never wanted anything more. I did felt a certain period of avoidance and then I was back at as a good friend. So, if anything, I think that's the period I might've been tossed in the friend zone? Not entirely sure, but she's still one of my best friends and I don't think she treats me that differently either.

And that is totally true. I totally love that girl and not so much in a romantic way. I also totally love my friend's fiance too. Yup, you didn't misread. And there's not a single bit of lust or anything in that way. She's also a really nice and awesome person and she's my other best friend's future wife. What is there not to love about her?

 

Well, If one day, somebody confessed to me (without me unconsciously putting them in the friendzone ... tehe!), If I like him as a friend but I can't accepte his feelings, I'll probably tell him openly. Not that I am strong or cold, just that I could not stand the pressure. I dislike awkwards situations and I don't like to pretend. I'm the kind of person who can't hurt people's feelings because I'm a coward. I would probably cut all relations because pretending being friends would be useless ... and sad for both of us.

 

I'll have to search for what you've wrote: those types of love, i read them for the first time.

So, if you were to choose between friendship and love what would you choose? Can you choose? Because you can't compare them.. It seems hard to answer but, in reality, the aswer depends of what do you treasure more. So, from your notions I see no relevant differences between the notions. Even in friendship you make sacrifices but, in love, sex do take place (usually). Are there any differences Between friendship and love?

From what you've wrote I understand that frienship is something expandable- any feelings dissapeared and you've remembered only what you deemed necessary . For me it isn't so easy to forget friends or to ignore friendship and that's because I don't offer my friendship to everyone and because I tend to give the second chance. I lose my feelings of friendship when I observe/discover that there was something in that relationship, that that my feelings were based on something fake. If, after an event, something changes at my friends and i realize that i can't continue being friends with him/her that doesn't mean that my feelings will disappear from the moment that friendship appeared.

I really can't see the point of why i should use the word 'love' for describing friendship. You need the context to understand the term and if you don't describe it, then, what's the point of using polisemantic words? You use love to describe the feelings of a parent for his child, to describe the relationship between lovers, from a religious point of view and so on when you could use different words.. Or give examples (thay's what i do and i do that because it's the internet and my english isn't the best one). Because the notions are hard to understand and define that doesn't mean that those who use them separately or give them different meanings are to be .. Ignored. But I'm really confused.. I saw, for example, that some companies or websites use the word 'friends' in a way that hollows it of every initial meaning. I'm annoyed by that, it's like any word that I know lost it's meaning.

I'm not referring to anyone, i just try to write in a general way. If there are some misunderstandings then, sorry. You choose to write and so you've allowed me to comment. Thank you all for the effort.

 

You mean expendable? I suppose you can interpret it that way. I don't mind. It is kind of like what you said.

Spoiler

Say, I'm in a relationship. It's nice and dandy. There are good times/feelings/memories and also some bad ones. Then eventually things go bad. I break up and we're still friends. A year later, the effects of "blinded by love" dissipates and the good times/feelings/memories just don't feel as "good" anymore. To top it off, we simply remember bad things much easier and better than good things. It really depends on how good/bad those relationships are. Mine just weren't as good as it seemed at the time.

It's more like, not that the feelings just disappear but changed. And a few years later, those feelings just don't matter anymore. They aren't part of your life anymore. And holding on to past memories/feelings aren't good for you. It'll just be stored in that box in the storage part of your mind that will never really open again.

I question you, do you "love" your parents? Do you "love" your siblings? Do you even "love" your pet(s)? I sure do. I don't see why I can use the word "love" to them and not friends. Sure, there are differences but at the end of the day, I do care about them quite a lot.

Anyways, that whole paragraph, I didn't get a single word (exaggeration intended).

Spoiler

I'll just simply say that each person's "love" is different. Take it as what others say and just accept it. Or else, you'll be going into some counselling service with them. And for what media (or websites) say about "love" and "friends", don't take it to heart. For me, at least, there will forever be differences (if you like games, ranks) between friends. Those that are just "friends" as in a bit better than strangers. Those that are like colleagues where you don't get that close. Those that you want to see every weekend and just chill with. And so on and so forth.

 

Nah, I took the Lasgun I received from him and shot him nonstop :x

 

If you were truly in love with someone they would be your best friend. Thats all i am saying

 

of course you can, just becouse you dont want to go out with someone in a romantic way, it doesnt mean you dont like the person, its two kinds of different relationships, and if you cant, that means that person isnt a friend to you but just someone you used to know( ♪)

 

That is also true. Well said.

Spoiler

And that is also why people should stop reading all those hentai or ero novels that totally messes up love with lust and some people actually do believe it, use it interchangeably, or it just slowly seeps in without them knowing.

 

The "friendzone" i believe is a crude term. It implies that the person who got "friendzoned" was only being friendly with the other person due to lust and not love. I've heard many guys complaining about how they got friendzoned. In most cases these same guys stopped associating with the chick they got rejected by. You tell me lust or love. If it was love they would try to understand the feelings of the opposite person and try to continue their previous relationship. I got "friendzoned" once and tbh me and the girl (who shall not be named) remained good friends up until high school

 

It could be lust. It could be love too. Like love with shame and ego. Like, "nobody likes to be friendzoned, and so I'll just stop associating with her". Or love with awkwardness. Some people just think that either we can be together in a bf/gf relationship, or be just plain friends, but not try to be bf/gf relationship and then friends. They can also be unable to accept being friendzone too and be angered. Or just feels better to leave the gal alone. Sometimes, that awkwardness will make people step back as being friendzoned caused some inconvenience already. Well, I'm just tossing a lot of hypothetical cases.

I suppose in some of those cases, it would be pride rather than lust, as in their manly pride triumphs over their love for the gal.

Hey, I'm not denying that lust can be and probably will be the major factor. Just saying that you shouldn't just toss all of them into the same category or giving only two option, lust or love.

 

Well, everything in you. The only barrier is your mind but.. You have to understand the 'why'. Humans have emotions and because they have emotions there is a conflict between what they want and what they think. Because you can't afford to ignore the needs you, as a human, try to obtain satisfaction in a indirect way. So, you read, watch or listen what others produce.. In your quest to understand life and yourself.

And so on..

 

I have voted.

The number is in the video link.. maybe

 

I liked them as people and good friends but I didn't feel butterfly or had romantic feelings toward them. I wanted to be friends/ best friends. But they didn't want to so we slowly drifted apart. I was sorry about it because of course, it hurts. But I can't help it and never felt sorry for not feeling the same ( I agree with remy911). I want to be with the person I really want to be with X: