I've been struggling with this for a bit. At first, I wanted to see if I could write. And surprise, surprise, anyone can.
So then I thought to myself why; why should I write? I thought I wanted to make people happy. I still do. But people will often read what they're comfortable with, they'll stick to what they know, they may judge my premise or style as unworthy simply because it is not to their taste. Even if I became a great writer, that could only be in my eyes, and not to anyone else. That was another reason, to be great. So the chances of me making other people happy or becoming great are minuscule...
Then perhaps I should write for the sake of writing. But that's insane. It's like a person saying I've been walking for 48 hours for the sake of it. Wouldn't that sound insane to you? Writing to improve on your writing can be a reason, but it's not a very sensible one.
So why! Why do I write! Why should I write! I don't understand! I climbed the hill and realized I could. I see a mountain in the distance, a tall vastness that is incomparable to anything else. But why climb it! I've read most other's reasons, reasons that seem incomprehensibly pedestrian. For the fun of it!? Because another story pissed me off!? All of them sound like, "just because"! I'm starting to think no one else has a reason either!
Well then... how am I supposed to do it!? I can't understand doing something for no reason! It's incomprehensible! Everything happens for a reason! Logic and order to everything!
I can't do anything seriously if I don't have a reason. The reason used to be to see if I could. Well, I have seen that I could. So what now?
Should I do it for my readers, to end the story I began? I suppose that'll be enough for now.
12/12/2019
Author
Silver Snake
Magician of NUF|Show-off|Awkward|Genius
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