Saying Goodbye, See you Later, See you Tomorrow...

Author

AliceShiki

『Ms. Tree』『Magical Girl of Love and Justice』, Female
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It can be... Surprisingly hard to say goodbye... Just goodbye, not a "Goodbye, we won't see each other anymore", but "see you laters~", something as simple as that can be surprisingly hard.

I tend to over think things a lot... It's just... How am I suppose to go say goodbye? Won't it look like I'm shoving the other person away? Won't it look like I want them to go? But I don't! I just think that they need to get ready for work, because it is about time for them to start getting ready... I just think that we can talk more later, but... But... But I get afraid of saying something that looks as if I'm dismissing them! >.<

Then I stayed silent, silent because I didn't want to start a new topic, afraid that this would make my girlfriend get late to work... But she also said nothing, and we kept silent, and then she said bye, because she needed to go to work and and and... And what's up with this awkward silence for a few minutes!? That felt horrible! Awkward silences are terrible! >.<

On another note, I really hate awkward silences, I desperately want to get rid of them as soon as possible... But an awkward silence with my girlfriend!? The world is ending! It's ending I tell you!!! >.<

Haa... I just felt like saying "I think you should log-off and get ready for work", but I held back on it because I didn't want to look like I'm dismissing her... I'm an idiot, I shouldn't overthink things too much and just say what's on my head properly...

But I get so afraid! I don't want to hurt her! I don't want her to get the wrong idea! I don't want to make her feel bad because I wasn't able to express myself properly! But now I could've made her feel bad anyway because I just yesterday said I hated awkward silences, and today I let it spread freely! >.<

... I'm really an idiot... T.T

Well... I hope she didn't mind it too much though, but I can't help worrying anyway... Though in the first place, why am I making this a blog post instead of just messaging this to her...? I mean, she is the one that I want to hear this, and I'm pretty sure I'll at least link her this post, or just rephrase the whole of it to her... Uhn... Maybe I just wanted to organize my head...

Still, it can be surprisingly hard to just say a "bye", can't it? I remember on the first months after my parents divorced, whenever I got home after meeting my father, we would say "bye" at least thrice before actually leaving, it was just... Hard, hard to say bye for real, not because we wouldn't see each other in the future, but because we would stop seeing each other now, on that instant we were separating.

And well, me, being this girl that overthinks all sorts of stuff... Yeah, it's pretty hard for me!
Especially because... I don't wanna say bye. The truth is, I want to stay with my GF 24/7, I want her her her and only her! I mean, sure, I can understand that being with each other 24/7 would be stressful, we wouldn't be able to get our things done, and lots of other problems would arrive, but... But right now I'm super entranced, okay!? I want her! I want her with me and I want to enjoy her company!!!

I want to cuddle, kiss and talk about anything and everything with her, slowly getting to know each other better, bit by bit, slowly but surely... I don't want to say goodbye just because it's 11pm, like... So what if I need to sleep!? I still want her company! >.<

... I say that, but I do go to sleep anyway... Doesn't mean I don't want to keep awake though!

I don't want to go away, I don't want her to go away, I don't want to dismiss her, I don't want her to think I'm dismissing her, yet she still needs to go, yet I still need to go... It's so... Bothersome...

I wish I could never say goodbye and just stay cuddling day in and day out... T.T

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Comments

    1. AliceShiki Apr 14, 2018
      @doomeye1337 Oh, I see... Pretty sure it's a cultural thing! Over here it's pretty common to just split bills if two people that aren't thaaaat close are eating together!

      If they are close, they probably already have some sort of agreement on how to handle it.
      doomeye1337 likes this.
    2. doomeye1337 Apr 14, 2018
      @AliceShiki sometimes the arguments over who'll pay for the meal takes longer than the meal itself.... It's a symbol of generosity, of wanting to continue/further the relationship, etc. If you let the other person pay too easily, you'll look like a greedy person who doesn't value his/her friendships. There's nothing wrong with saying "hey let's continue and /or advance this positive relationship we have", but it eats up too much time <.<;; all of us hyphenated Asian kids over here always talk to each other about how annoying it was when our parents did that. It's more or less what happens as long as you're dealing with someone non-family. When it's an internal family thing, generally the oldest person pays.
    3. AliceShiki Apr 14, 2018
      @doomeye1337 Perhaps it is a cultural thing! >.<

      What happened to my mom was more like... "I need to go" then the other party agreed and she started packing up... But they kept talking... And talking... And talking... And the talk didn't end... It absolutely didn't end.

      After around 1/2 an hour she'd say "No really, I really need to go", so she'd get back to packing up... And talking... And keep on talking... And the process would repeat X times until she finished packing up, reached the door, reached the car, entered it, and finally closed the door, then we would leave.

      It took a while.

      ... You have arguments over who will pay? Family restaurants are always split over here, with friends it's either split, or if it's on someone's home, that person pays (we go to different houses all the time, so it evens out in the end)
      doomeye1337 likes this.
    4. doomeye1337 Apr 14, 2018
      @AliceShiki might be a cultural thing then <.<;; I clearly remember when family friends came over or vice versa, saying goodbye could literally take hours. It's kinda like the whole "I'll pay" "oh no, I'll pay" etc. argument that always happens at restaurants with family friends >.>;; it also translated to the internet chat rooms I used to frequent (a lot of the people involved were hyphenated Asians or Asians) where byes from people in the social inner circle always took like 30 minutes XD. It was around that time I started my habit of keeping my personal good byes short.
      AliceShiki likes this.
    5. AliceShiki Apr 13, 2018
      @doomeye1337 Well, I don't have problems in saying goodbye succinctly most of the time, and even then, I never reached a 30 minutes bye! xD

      ... Coming to think of it, my mom is pretty terrible at saying bye though, she really takes a long long time to do it.

      My big ones usually last no longer than 5 minutes.
    6. doomeye1337 Apr 13, 2018
      lots of people have trouble saying good-bye succinctly for the same reason : you don't want to make the other person feel unwanted. That's kinda why I developed a habit of just saying good bye and then leaving : those 30 minute+ farewells were stressing me out lol. I realize it can come across badly but I'm also confident that those who know me know that I don't mean anything bad by it.
    7. AliceShiki Apr 8, 2018
      @Clozdark That's actually an interesting way of doing it! xD

      I might say something like that next time~
      Clozdark likes this.
    8. Clozdark Apr 8, 2018
      Re arrange the word is probably a good choice in this situation.
      - like what you want to eat when going back?
      - let's watch this movie later together
      - have a nice trip
      - see you soon
      - i prepared a surprise when you back
      - want to get massage in the bed tonight?
      doomeye1337, yuzuki and AliceShiki like this.
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