I think I already talked a bit about labels (if not, that's okay, I'm talking about them now~), but... Well, to put it simply, I think they're annoying. In particular, labels related to sexual identity are really annoying.
Like the whole joke of "traps are gay" or that "it isn't gay if they are cute" or something... It's like... That's now how it works.
An heterosexual man finding a guy dressed as a girl cute doesn't make him homosexual, it just shows his heteroattraction (dunno if the term exists or not, I don't care, I'm coining it if it doesn't). Essentially, he is attracted to people of the opposite gender, that's all there is to it. If he suddenly discovers that whom he thought as a girl is actually a man, he may lose this attraction or not, which then touches on his heterosexuality... Until then though, it's just pure physical attraction, it has nothing to do with sexuality.
Being attracted to traps doesn't make someone gay, that's just not how it works, if someone has been attracted to women all their lives, and keep being attracted to women, and has no intention of getting into a relationship with another man, they are obviously heterossexual, and they are sexually attracted to the opposite gender... Which may backfire on them in case they see someone crossdressing.
It's a whole different thing when talking about Emotional Attraction... Which is... Uhn... A bit hard to explain I guess... It's like... It's easier if I use a personal example.
I'm bisexual, and I'm a lot more attracted to girls, sexually speaking. Their bodies are a lot more alluring to me no matter how hot any guy out there is... At the same time, I think I'm a lot more emotionally attracted to men. I feel a sense of security when near men and feel like I have someone I can rely upon, that I can bury my body on and cry my heart out and... Honestly, I would just feel plain weird if I dated someone shorter than me, not because of I have anything against shorter people or because I feel taller people are hotter... I just want to stand on my tiptoes when kissing (it honestly feels scary to even consider needing to bend down to kiss someone), and want to lay on my significant other's chest easily while we're in bed and enjoy a comfy snuggle...
It's a physical aspect, but my reasons are physical... It's weird. Plain weird. But it's how it works.
Most people have matching sexual and emotional attractions I think, but it's by no means a problem to have them as different... One can also think that when someone likes people of one gender, but absolutely can't understand them, so they need to constantly consult with friends, is someone emotionally attracted to the same gender while sexually attracted to the other... It's really not a problem, but not exactly an easy thing to deal with, can be quite a big dilemma.
What really annoys me though, are the labels... I'm bisexual, so I have to like both genders equally, person A is hetero, so they can't find someone of the same gender hot, person B is homosexual, so they can't find people of the opposite gender hot... That's not how it works. People are more complex than a single label for heaven's sake.
Hmmm... This has been something that has kinda been on my mind, but it only came to me enough to make me want to make a blog after reading Nanashi no Asterism... Yeah, that manga really got in me... Uhn... For this one I can't speak without spoilers.
So, while the author doesn't directly give any labels or treats about this part of the characters in particular (especially because they're too young to be worrying about this kind of stuff for the most part) is how sexual identity of the character roster is completely different.
While the 3 girls are on a love triangle with one another (a particularly bad type of triangle when their interests just don't match at that), Kotooka (I really love this girl btw!) is the one that genuinely identifies herself as a lesbian. Tsukasa and Washio are clearly in love with girls, but none of them seem to have a defined sexual identity, Tsukasa seems to be Hetero though, and just happened to fall in love with a girl, while Washio is plain and simple undefined... Which is also okay, especially for her age.
On the matter of Kotooka, it's also nice how she is the only one that understands the feelings of their triangle, and how she tries denying her own feelings... Kotooka doesn't view Tsukasa as a lesbian, but as a girl with a temporary affection for Washio, she wants Tsukasa to find a man for herself, for her to overgrow those feelings and become "normal". Just like she herself wants to deny her homosexuality and keeps on jumping from one boyfriend to another for the sake of trying to achieve this "normality".
I think this is very real and amazing, how she denies herself and tries her best to shy away her feelings, to run away from her own sexual attraction for the sake of what society views as acceptable as well as how she herself wants these feelings to disappear.
The other interesting character is Subaru, which can only feel truly comfortable when crossdressing as his sister, he feels a need for his sister and kinda takes her into himself in order to feel the comfort her presence brings... Tsukasa is a key character for him in an extremely affectionate way, but by no means in an emotional way... And it's also clear how he crossdresses for himself and himself only, he doesn't do it because he wants others to look at him as a girl, but he feels more at ease when he is like that... It feels like the author is hinting that he might actually be transgender, but he himself doesn't even know what that is.
Subaru is a pretty complex character, and that is why he is also a character I love a lot! It's not really clear if what he likes is just crossdressing or if it goes somewhere beyond that... At the same time, he feels like other people falling in love for him can be creepy, so he might be asexual... Or not, because he feels some affection towards Asakura, so he might be homosexual... Or, in case he is transgender, this actually makes him hetero.
I loved Subaru because it shows an extremely complicated conflict within his mind, he has no idea on how he should feel or act for the most part, he is just hoping things don't change and he doensn't need to worry about change... He doesn't need to worry about growing up, or losing the people he cares for... He impersonates a lot of teenage worries, some more common, and some a lot more complicated, he was a really good character!
And what makes him fit this blog post a lot more than Kotooka (even though I like her a lot more), is because the labels just don't fit him... He is in conflict, many conflicts, he has no idea about how he himself should act or feel, labels don't fit him, it's pointless to try and label him because he doesn't understand how they should apply to him. He is just one mess of an extremely realistic character that heavily depends on others and doesn't know how to walk with his own two feet.
And lastly we have Asakura, which is somewhat similar to Tsukasa in the way that he is probably hetero... However... He gets a crush towards Subaru. He definitely gets a clear crush towards Subaru... But Subaru is a confusing character that is hard to define... What does this make Asakura then?
Is he homosexual? But he had a crush on Tsukasa in the past. Is he bisexual? I don't think he looks like it, Subaru seems like more of an exception than the norm. Or is the fact that Subaru is so girlish at times that makes Asakura's heart beat? Is the possible transexuality of Subaru what drags Asakura towards him? It's difficult to say. Because... Those labels don't make any $¨&*¨&(*& sense!!!
Well, that was one big spoiler~
What I wanted with it was to discuss a bit how the whole thing about the labels of sexual identity are limited, and how even if you do have a set sexual identity, you can still have cases of being attracted to someone you wouldn't normally be...
I know a case of 2 people IRL, both men, one is homosexual and the other is hetero... And they dated for a while. One of them was clearly hetero, he loved girls, he was not bisexual or anything... But, he dated a guy, and was serious about it... Why? Because they matched, because my homosexual friend flirted with him and he sort of gave in and decided to see how it went... It's complicated. Sexuality is complicated. Attraction is complicated. Affectivity is complicated. It's all complicated, and I don't think it's a good idea to simply label things in small boxes.
Personally speaking, I was a lesbian for as long as I remember, I didn't even consider dating a guy before I fell head over heels for my ex. I became bisexual after quite a bit of introspection after we broke up... But at that point, I definitely wasn't, I was a lesbian dating a guy I was absolutely in love with.
Love is complicated, it's very complicated and takes a multitude of factors into account, your own identity, your physical attraction to the other party and how you emotionally get close to them are just a small part of it. Labels to categorize people in one way or the other when trying to relate to something as complex as love is... Haa... Honestly tiring.
Uhn... Can I resume this whole thing as "Traps aren't gay!"? Probably not, but it does play a part on why I wrote this tbh, this kind of discussion bothers me quite a bit... I don't think you should bother with labeling someone as gay in the first place, let them do that regardless of who they get attracted to.
Sexual Attraction, Sexual Identity and Emotional Attraction.
Author
AliceShiki
『Ms. Tree』『Magical Girl of Love and Justice』, Female
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