Corrupt a Wish

Granted, but you have to shout "I hate cats" every time you use space and time abilities.

I wish for a backyard full of mystical creatures.

 

Granted but they are only a bunch of your imaginary friends~

I wish for my room to be an all-in-one house!!

 

granted, but its only fit for people the size of dwarfs to live

i wish for the next wish to appear

 

Granted but your internet suddenly went haywire making you unable to reply~

I wish for an invisible and mighty A.I. chip connected to my consciousness!!

 

Granted, but sadly you were unconscious when it was set up and fell into a coma

I wish to throw a pie into the next poster

 

Granted, but I have a force field that bounce anything thrown at me back to the thrower.

I wish games can become reality.

 

Granted, you're stuck in a game while your real body rots

I wish for a library with all the novels fully translated

 

Granted, but it accidentally catches on fire

I wish to be a ninja

 

Granted, but your ninja teacher was naruto, a fictional character

I also wish to be a ninja

 

Granted, but ninja teacher will be rock lee and you'll be forced to have a bowl cut

I wish Saitama was my teacher

 

granted, he destroyed the world cause he doesn't want to deal with you anymore

I wish everyone was equally unhappy

 

Granted, everyone was equally unhappy towards you~

I wish for unlimited free supply of fresh Yogurt!!

 

granted but the secret ingredient was cat innards

I wish everyone would fall into depression

 

Granted but it all ends after some fresh air and drinking water~

I wish to be accident and illness proof!!

 

Granted, but you'll be a human panacea and your blood will be used for medicine making

I wish I stopped hiccuping

 

Granted the dead does not hiccup anymore~

I wish for a ring that bestows the abilities, I needed everyday!!

 

Granted, but some random maniac chopped all of your fingers so you cant wear it.
I want a girlfriend :0

 

Granted, but she will be two timing you

I wish I never had hunger

 

Granted, you've lost the feeling of hunger but you still need to eat. Since you wished for NEVER, it means that you never ate and thus. . .

I wish i was impervious to the cold winter

 

Granted, but you're extremely sensitive to heat so much that you melt under the sun

I wish Starbucks sold brain juices