Hi all. ive been thinking about starting a light novel or something and this is what ive created so far. can you all rate it for me. id really appreciate it. GodKing’s Tree David was just a regular 15-year-old boy. That was the fact at least until he turns 16. You see, everyone who turns 16 gets a certain root identified in your body. These roots are called spirit roots. They can help a person become extraordinary. They could become immortals, demons, war machines, and many more. The people who use these roots and nurture them are called cultivators. Now cultivators, they can be fit into 2 categories, those who work hard, and those who have talent. Those who have talents are the luckiest. Their spirit roots are the greatest cultivation treasures they have. Those with the legendary God Root can cultivate thousands of times faster than those with basic five elemental root. They are also much rarer for people to have though. There is only a 1 in 10 million chance of someone having that root. Most people are born with regular roots such as the five element roots. The five-element root is basic for ordinary people and some lucky ones have a chance of awakening the Sole Element Root. They can cultivate faster than others if they have the right environment. Such as a Sole Water Root cultivator cultivates faster in bodies of water or Wind cultivators on top of mountains in the sky where wind flows freely. Some people can be born with basic zero element roots, but they are also rare. People who are born with this root are labeled as trash and insignificant. They cultivate slower than everyone and would be lucky if they ever made it the first stage of cultivation. This is where our story begins, The Story of God King David the Shura of the Forgotten Realms. Chapter 2: Birthday Beginnings David awoke amidst a cold winter morning. Today he did not want to get out of bed, mostly because he was up all night too nervous to fall asleep. Today was his big day. The day he gets to see if he will ever be an immortal. Ever since David was a young child, he wanted to be like the immortals he has heard about in stories told by his grandparents. The immortals would fly on swords in the sky and battle with demon beasts, they would find riches and powerful techniques in ancient secret realms made by even more powerful immortals. They lived lives of adventure and fortune, never a dull moment. David let out a massive yawn and sat up on his old bed that has been stained with age. He looked to his alarm clock and realized he still has a couple hours before he must go to school. Just because its his big day does not mean he can forget his studies. He got out of his bed and stretched, went into his closet and came out in his set of jogging shorts and a no-sleave shirt he got for his birthday a couple of years ago. He went downstairs to see that no one is home, just like how it usually is. He goes to grab an apple from the fridge but sees a note on the door that wasn’t there yesterday (he doesn’t think it was anyway). ‘Happy Birthday sweetie, I know I can’t make you breakfast for your special day, but you know how work is. I will see you after school and ill take you to get your root examined. I know how you have been working hard, and you are going to get a Sole-element root and become a big immortal like grandpa always said you would. Love you always.” -Mom He smiled weakly and knew that his hopes were not high. Both of his parents have a 5-element root, and they could not be more useless at cultivation. His father tried to cultivate when he was young but was injured by another cultivator and lost his root in the fight. He married David’s mother after the became mortal again and they had him. Because of this, his family has always been on the bottom rung of the ladder. He never sees his father since he is always working at a dead-end job making low pay and his mother works equally as hard as a waitress at a low-end dinner. He does not blame his parents. He knew they were not at fault. He does want to raise the well being of his family not just for them but for his little sister and soon to be little brother. He exercises every day, no matter whether it is a heat wave that will burn the hairs off a fly or the harshest blizzard that will leave the city without power for a month. He read once in a book that if you exercise your mortal body everyday as hard as you can and break the limits set upon yourself, you can nurture the spirit root in your body until it levels up, into a better root. He walks outside and stretches, then he begins he 10 mile run he must get done in the couple of hours before school. He sets these goals for not only his future, but the future of his family. He will be an immortal one day. That is the promise he gave himself and his grandfather that recently died. Becoming one of the best cultivators in the know realms is his one and true goal in his unexpectedly long life.
I like it but I always find it weird when western names are used lol. It doesn't have to be Chinese but can be fantasy names as well you know