Have to admit that I am rather jaded these days. Been on my own for about a year now after years of putting up with boat loads of crap, and always being the one to compromise. On one hand freedom is nice without having to be at someone’s beck and call... but I can’t seem to channel my motivation to make use of that freedom. Or rather I could be far more efficient at it. I have thought about volunteering but I no longer seem to have the font of patience I used to have, and find myself easily annoyed at times. Maybe I have that cat parasite. I did volunteer at my range over the weekend, and enjoyed talking to people there but that’s because they are enthusiasts like me.
Day 11 Still clean. Phone interviewed with medical folk doing VR. It went decently well. Custom volumetric shaders, wow color me impressed. It is a bit daunting though as these are some really smart people. Although I consider myself to be fairly smart, I currently lack long term focus. There’s also the Peter Principle parallel at work where one continuously moves up until they reach a point where they are no longer as smart as their peers. Still, maybe I shall be the sword that is forged in the fires of adversity and rise to the challenge. I’d pretty much have to fully immerse myself in this stuff, and go full blown fanatic on it. Tomorrow morning I have another interview in person for a tech job in the financial sector. Kind of bread and butter for me but more tech than the hybrid jack of all trades master of none stuff I’ve done. Probably easier, and pays much more. Should I go for a more laid back stable job or do I want to bleed and struggle in a field that I find interesting but only have entry level xp in? Well, maybe the decision is out of my hands. I should get a good night’s rest.
[QUOTE="SublimeWay, post: 4043703, member: I did volunteer at my range over the weekend, and enjoyed talking to people there but that’s because they are enthusiasts like me.[/QUOTE] You just proved my point. You said you were in a situation that made you compromise. Well compromise is only for true grown ups and you won't be that until you get a kid that you love so much that you could go hungry for them. Selfishness is important, the best way to be selfish is to do selfless acts. I won't bother you with a lecture but volunteer more at that place and get rid of your current bad state of mind. Yes you have met some crappy people but with over 7 billion people on earth there are a lot more that you haven't met yet. The odds are in your favor. My advice, dump this thread it's enabling your reclusive behaviour. Don't become a fully fledged hikkimori or was NEET!! Also do watch this http://wiki.d-addicts.com/Date
The setback must have been huge. I recommend two things Edit and delete your private info from the open forum, conversations are for that You can only move forward, you said being around like minded people helped. Do that more often. Books are supposed to be a side dish not the main dish of your life. It is like eating candy as your main meal three times a day, it will leave you malnourished
Reckoning is upon me. Got an offer today for VR, interviewed at the other place too, think they liked me. Chances are they’ll offer tomorrow at 2x the rate of the first place. First place is also only 4 month with option to extend. 2nd is 6 month contract to hire. VR place allows work from home, other places requires a 30-45 min drive each way. I need the remote flexibility? Do I want to be like a post doc (not a real one since I only have a MS) or stay corp cog? Just tried a vr360 pod to reinforce the VR appeal but now I feel pukeish. It did a wonderful falling sensation. Salary is just a number as long as I’m not buying houses or cars. QoL isn’t really affected. Number of toys is though. Stability also matters but if I don’t switch now then when?
Day 12 Still clean. Didn’t do anything for my VR project. So need to tomorrow. Decision time. Probably go with the lower paying but more interesting one to follow my dream. Still... half the amount of pay is painful even conceptually. That combined with a poor benefits package... sigh. Well, guess I can sink a year or two into an attempted career change, and climb from the bottom up again.
Day 13 Still clean. 90% set on the VR job. 3 month later when they run out funding I might be back at square 1 but hey, gotta at least give it a try. Summer is going to rough on my availability anyway so the VR job at least gives me the flexibility of working remotely. If I do this I have to basically work, eat, sleep and dream about VR dev 24/7 for the next 3 month. Either I’ll burn out or I’ll produce something half way decent. I tend to be one of those who perform better under the sword of democles or at least I used to be. Now I feel kind of parched without the daily rush from web novels. Maybe my whole reward system has been twisted so that it’s difficult to be thrilled by something productive because it’s so easy to be thrilled by something else.
Day 13 Still clean. Created my first editor script. Yay! It was recursive too. Non rigid bodies with collisions is just flakey. Guess there’s a reason why no one really does that. Got more rigged skinned meshes up and running. Need to think different approaches to this. Spent 6 hours today on this. Focus is improving? The sword is getting closer?
Day 14 Still clean. VR interactions can be really challenging at times. This whole slide your hand along the rope is much more difficult than I thought. Yes it works with colliders but it keeps slipping when you move too fast. Is there some way to keep the rope within the collider? Maybe a late update call to keep the particles constrained within the collider? And that nasty crash. How frustrating. Well, I guess it comes with the bleeding edge. On a completely random note, Manga Guide to CPUs is quite a good read. Reminds me of DSL class in college with all the gates and latches. Wonder how much better I would’ve learned and retained that knowledge if this book was around then. Also have the Manga Guide to Electricity. Maybe I should look into the Biology one as well. Bought some more assets thanks to the May sale. Easy Save because that seems useful -although I have a Google sheets integration already. Also bought another animation editor asset. Now I have at least 3 of those: Skele, Muscle Editor and now the new one. although I have very little talent in creating animations, this new one has some interesting blend shape features as well as a video showing it work with VRIK showing a cat ear flattening animation which sort of sold it for me. When will I learn.
Day 15 Still clean. Planning to travel to some place hot and humid, and camping there for a few days. Sunk a fair amount of time watching Princess Principal which is surprisingly good considering I’ve burned through most of the anime on prime. Guess you can’t really judge things by the cover. Spent several hours looking for a scanner/mfd. Finally settled on one. Brain stormed about dragging things along splines. Really need to read up on catmull rom splines.
Day 16 Still clean. 90 degree weather here compared to 60 degree. Thinking about getting points along iTween path, and finding distance to controller point. This seems rather expensive. Can I get current point on curve and then step prev/next to determine which direction to move? Might get stuck on a local min but my path should be relatively straight forward. Also need to sink several hours into debugging crashes. Can I force a particle in a physics simulation to be bounded and still look natural? Don’t want to build my own solver.
Day 17 Still clean. It’s quite maddening to teach kids to put together a presentation these days. There’s just a lot of cut and paste going on from Google without real understanding. Now get off my lawn! Spent most of the day as a gopher. Was completely burned out. My path dragging didn’t go anywhere. Did finish season 1 of Princess Principal which was fairly dark despite what the cover and ending scene credits would suggest.
Day 18 Still clean. Not reading but not terrible productive either. Watched a couple of episodes of Chuck that I had missed. Always felt Jake 2.0 was more interesting. Need to find out about my immunizations haven’t had to do that since my college days. Got a drag along curve working with two different algorithms. Neither is great because they can get stuck on local mins. Then again the curves used at fairly simple with no loops. Kind of lacking inspiration.
Day 19 Still clean. Nothing went right today. Rushed all over the place but nothing meaningful was done. Tracing things along a path in VR is a headache. Managed to get configurable joints working for sliding an object but it doesn’t work in VR. My path dragging thing is also flawed in that the path are not parents to anything. I have to physically move each control point. This is maddening. Physics slider seems to work but it has a funny offset for the hand model I’m using. Just can’t figure it out so all I can do is to manually offset the offset. Guessing it’s a pivot/center problem but my mind is mush right now. Can’t find my center.
Day 20 Still clean. Felt pretty unbalanced yesterday. Maybe that was withdrawal? Ended up using Surge for spline path. It has patented nodes, and closest point to path which iTween did not. Frakensteined a VR hand dragging setup. Not too sure how it will look on a movable path. Ended up watching the first season of Vivid Strike which was very odd in concept (being a boxing/MG mashup) but decently watchable. Should try to get bone/particle coordinates today. Wonder if I can attach a collider to the object on the path so it lifts things as it passes. What to do for... rats, lost my train of thought.
Day 21 Still clean. Managed to get path to follow rigged bone coordinates. Have not done it for particle coordinates but can probably pin the particle to zero weight objects and follow the objects. Need to create a more user friendly path tracer that allows easy path node following, a start, stop and completed msg settings and event notifications. Also does path have have rotation as well as position? Need to look into collision layers to prevent grab colliders from hitting physics colliders. Maybe I can disable grab collider on grab?
Day 22 Still clean. Going back home today. The past week has been quite frustrating. Maybe I will feel better at home. Still I feel sad to leave. Cobbled together my path tracer. Very raw though. Start collider is funny. Tried to switch to percentage of path as start state but it didn’t work. Attempt to integrate with rigged model caused the grip point to offset mysteriously. Is this a timing issue? Maybe force a drop and reset will fix it. I hate not understanding and just patching. Looks like spline path do not contain rotation orientation info or at least not as currently implemented in Surge. I can get a plane to follow a path but it can’t roll as it turns. This seems odd to me as the control points have rotation info. Can I slerp from control point to control point rotations?
Day 23 Still clean. Although I stayed up till 3 am playing games. Spent loads of time looking for my immunization records to no avail. Guess i’ll Need to be tested for a bunch of things. Spline orientation is still on my mind. Why hasn’t someone built something to accommodate this? Am I missing something conceptual? Also need to build a randomization engine. Kind of like a random item equipper with adjustable rates.
This is turning into a novel on its own. Add in some fantasy elements and bam! You've got yourself an epistolary novel in the making~