The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System fan fiction

Discussion in 'Community Creations' started by alexfilia, Jun 6, 2017.

  1. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    Bruh, aoguang my bro, was it worth it?
    (actually reading the scene of you indulgin i feel like you don't even think you've been taken advantage of but instead was the one who profited in the end. and honestly...i can see that)
     
  2. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    You fool...ruling a kingdom is an exhaustive and very hands on type of thing. Well it should be if you want it to be a thriving and self sustaining kingdom and era. If you don't have the skills, motivation, and the attention span to do as shizun does...be like i dunno an assistant or something don't just grab the position and then do fuckall with it.


    ( i dunno you guys binghe is starting to seriously fray my nerves...is that weird? Anywho thank you for these delicious morsels @Gav~ Hope yer having a wonderful day~)
     
  3. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    HA!
    "DAD I WANT TO GO BACK HOME!!! TAKE ME BACK PLS PSLPSLSPLSPLSPSL"
    okay so non 'non-negotiable and unreasonable' psycho binghe is okay
     
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  4. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    oooh boi. yea bad joo joo
     
  5. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    LMAO!!!! MA BOI YANG DEWEI FINALLY GOT A SIGNIFICANT OTHER~
     
  6. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    Oh my god....smart, wham bam thank you ma'am. One hit after another. You gotta give this binghe credit....he knows his strategies (that don't end in homicide, murder, torture. SO POINTS FOR HIM!!!!)
     
  7. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    (groan)
    react gif (grimace).gif
    The misunderstandings, the what-ifs the regrets!!! IT IS MAKING MY HEART ACHE AND WRIGGLE!

    i demand this discomfort to cease and desist ('cept then i would have to stop reading the story, but damn am i invested >-> )
     
  8. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    ....hey @Gav i had to take a walk because of this.....are you proud of yourself? (covers face) aaaa i'm weak to filthy talk and supernova in mind inducing treatments!!!
     
  9. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    YEA MING FAN BEAT EM UP!!! NOBODY GETS TO DISS OUR SHIFU LIKE THAT!!!!
     
  10. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    Okay...Now i'm all caught up!!
     
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  11. Gav

    Gav [Fairy of the Garden of Evil]

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    /pets you happily! Welcome back. Did you read the yellow chicken post and the one that came after it?.
     
  12. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    ....uhhhhhhh help this clueless child. I don't know if you just refer to them by name.
    Summary would be more useful
     
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  13. Gav

    Gav [Fairy of the Garden of Evil]

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    The ones right after the lamb chops which you quoted.
     
  14. Hydrochoerus

    Hydrochoerus Well-Known Member

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    hmmmm i too have considered the perks and results of an undead help assistants or community. ALSO socializing would no longer be a concern. so more points
     
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  15. Gav

    Gav [Fairy of the Garden of Evil]

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    *
    The Long Courtships of Lian Yunying, Wu Guen and Ao Jiang
    *
    When Lian Yunying's grandfather found out that the gifts that the Lian family had received for a bride price were being sent over by Qing Jing's inner sect disciple, Wang An, he had been torn by indecision.

    On one hand, Qing Jing's peak lord was reknowned and masterful, and Cang Qiong Mountain sect was unmistakably the greatest of the big four sects. This wasn't a marriage offer from a small sect or a middle class sect. Cang Qiong could easily roll them over and not even blink. To gain an alliance with them through his precious grandson would naturally catapult his grandson to a high position in their own sect and everyone he knew was already looking at Yunying with envy.

    However, Elder Lian had always hoped his grandson would have children. That was actually why he had always been willing to cover up for the boy's indiscretions with women.

    In the end, the factor that helped him make his decision was the fact that Wang An had promised that Yunying could have concubines of his own to bear children for him.

    Lian Yunying himself had been both appalled by the blatant claim on him that these jewels meant and his eyes watered reflexively as his mind began to conjure up images of how being a male wife might be like.

    He didn't like that idea at all!

    Well, his cousins certainly envied him for the proposal, which only made him feel more trapped and hunted.

    Meanwhile Ao Jiang and Wu Guen nursed grudges.

    The very blatant gifts sent over had tipped their families off to the fact that something had gone on between them and Wang An.

    Naturally, their families wanted to know all about it, which put the two former disciples of the defunct sect at a distinct loss.

    Neither Ao Jiang nor Wu Guen wanted to ever explain that they had been.... forced... into sexual servitude.

    Okay, it had been incredibly pleasurable and Wang An had certainly never physically harmed them.

    That wasn't the point!

    They hadn't wanted to be taken as male brides then and they certainly didn't want to be taken as male brides now!

    ***
    Naturally, Lian Yunying, Wu Guen and Ao Jiang all didn't want to discuss why Wang An had sent those gifts over to their families with marriage offers.

    The prospect of explaining that they had been debauched and deflowered was too embarrassing for them! They wanted to keep their dignity as men!

    Naturally each of them came up with their own spin on the situation, glossing over and when necessary, lying through their teeth.

    Then Wu Guen and Ao Jiang found out that Wang An had also sent the bride price gifts to Lian Yunying and were shocked and angry, sending Wang An letters of complaint which cursed him out for being a fickle fiend.

    Wang An's response was to visit Wu Guen and Ao Jiang's family estates, one after the other.

    Wu Guen, upon hearing that Wang An had come to visit him, locked himself up in his rooms and sent servants to say he didn't want to see Wang An. Wang An was a fiend who... who... had... uh...

    Okay, Wang An had gone and bedded someone else and then offered to marry them too.

    Except Wu Guen knew he had no logical reason to complain about that because wasn't that what he and Ao Jiang had been hoping he would do? Forget them and take someone else?

    Except when Wang An did it, why did it make Wu Guen feel so horrible?

    Ah, this was frustrating and he couldn't even really tell anyone why!

    He settled on cursing Wang An for being a fickle fiend who had gone after another man after starting marriage negotiations with him and Ao Jiang, and then cursed Wang An out further for coming to break the engagement.

    Except it turned out Wang An had no intention of breaking the engagement and was completely earnest about having Wu Guen as one of his male brides.

    In fact, he was willing to answer any questions Wu Guen's parents and family may ha-

    Wu Guen immediately unlocked his door and quickly headed out to intercept Wang An and prevent him from telling his parents anything that could ruin their mental image of him.

    This scene repeated itself in Ao Jiang's household, because naturally, Ao Jiang couldn't stand the idea that his sordid days of being debauched like a concubine would be revealed to his doting parents.

    Luckily, Wang An was kind enough to play along with their story and act appropriately with great politeness and consideration towards Wu Guen and Ao Jiang who were both incredibly chilly towards him.

    The discussion of marriage then covered the fact that both families would prefer if their two boys could still have children. Once again, Wang An's statement that he was perfectly fine with Ao Jiang and Wu Guen having concubines did a bit to allay their families' concerns.

    It was a fact that their cousins tended to be envious of Ao Jiang and Wu Guen for attracting a much stronger sect's powerful disciple and get him to offer marriage when even concubinage would have been a coveted prize for several people of lower power levels and ranks such as Ao Jiang and Wu Guen were purported to be.

    Lian Yunying by contrast, was like a shivering little white rabbit who was facing a slavering wolf when Wang An arrived to negotiate with his grandfather.

    Of course his grandfather did also complain that Wang An was also intending to marry two other men from a defunct sect, which became another bargaining and delaying tool.

    As a direct result, what Wang An had hoped would be a quick retrieval and pomp-filled ceremony became a much longer and more difficult conquest than he expected.

    This in turn caused even more rumors to cascade around, refreshed with each set of courting gifts sent over, causing Lian Yunying, Ao Jiang and Wu Guen to feel incredibly uncomfortable.

    Then Wang An accepted Marquis Ziming's proposal and married him in a pomp filled ceremony. A red wedding sedan, the family and friends attending, the dowry, the bride price, betrothal gifts, the massive feast... every single facet of a proper wedding ceremony was observed and Ziming married in despite his brother's spectacular fiasco on the night of his wedding.

    ....At that point Wu Guen, Ao Jiang and Lian Yunying's messages of complaint were matched by their families' letters of complaint which were only quelled by Wang An's visiting them again.

    And this time he pointed out that the only reason he hadn't married them earlier was that they themselves had insisted on drawing this negotiation out and refusing to meet with him whenever they could avoid it.

    ***
    This whole fiasco of marriage negotiation was actually incredibly dog's blood.

    It was so dramatic that people loved to gossip about it and every little detail of the courtship and marriage negotiations were being discussed constantly, from each of the courting gifts, to the bride price and betrothal gifts, to speculations on what the feast for each of the men would be like.

    Naturally, Ao Jiang, Wu Guen and Lian Yunying were all made very uncomfortable by the details of their personal lives being dragged out by this... this... clusterfuck.

    Lian Yunying, in a way, was the worst off because he was the most intimidated by the idea of marrying in. As a bride, no less.

    On one hand, it was still better than concubinage...

    Concubines had far fewer rights than wives.

    But still!

    Yunying had always thought that he would be the husband and he would have three subservient wives and four concubines. He would be the man everyone envied, and he would have plenty of female beauties. He would be a valued sect genius and everyone would envy and respect him.

    Well, there was no question about having his own concubines, he could certainly have those. But wives? Those were out of his hands from now on.

    And the galling thing was that any requests to buy beauties would have to be run past his new husband to be.

    The loss of control and the derailment of his dreams definitely kept him off balance, which was why things took as long as they did on his end.

    ***
    Greed is a wonderful motivator.

    Wang An was very stubborn, very persistent and quite willing to ostensibly (by mortal standards!) pour wealth like wine.

    That and Wang An's (frankly suspicious!) willingness to be discreet, accomodating and even polite towards his prospective in-laws eventually won the day, since the Ao, Wu and Lian extended families had quickly figured out that Wang An's taking their cousins or nephews as brides meant that they would, firstly no longer be competitors for existing family assets and secondly, the marriage was clearly bringing in a good alliance that could be a shady tree to shelter them and excellent new assets their families could profit from. As a result, they were quite willing to gently maneuver the prospective brides in the direction that they felt would profit them.

    Specifically because Ao Jiang, Wu Guen and Lian Yunying couldn't disclose what had happened between them and Wang An, they had no way of refuting his courtship.

    Worse, in Ao Jiang and Wu Guen's case, they were so confused and muddled in their feelings towards Wang An that they couldn't even justify to themselves a complete refusal of his offer, which meant they could only waver and dillydally without giving a straightforward rejection.

    Thus, in the end, they found themselves in red wedding sedans, feeling apprehensive, jittery, disgruntled and oddly expectant without having a clear reason why.
     
    Last edited: Aug 12, 2018 at 6:11 AM
  16. wraven881

    wraven881 Hungry Grouch

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    ......Fuck I just realized that this is from that virtuous wife novel...... [slaps palm on face]
     
  17. Gav

    Gav [Fairy of the Garden of Evil]

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    Lolololol tis an expy
     
  18. xenotop

    xenotop Well-Known Member

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    random thought:
    without the help of these fools who've tried and tested the stupid ways first, the rest wouldn't be able to cross out all the wrong ways to do it. these guys are heroes. :blobpopcorn::blobpopcorn::blobpopcorn::blobpopcorn:
     
  19. wraven881

    wraven881 Hungry Grouch

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    [squirts water bottle at Chen's face]
    BAD DOG! SIT!
     
  20. wraven881

    wraven881 Hungry Grouch

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    [blinks]
    Er..... At least Binghe looks good in drag? I think I got scarred away from men in drag by Bun and someone else's posts about One Piece drag arc....